A/N: Inspired by the epic writer Penelope Wendy Bing's 'Fate's Cradle.' Seriously check out her shit it is off the chain, I am in love. I wondered if perhaps Katniss could go back to the Reapings, what would she do? I have an actual story about this, but here is an AU of a 'could be.' Involving Cato, who thanks to the movies inspired me to think perhaps at the end he did realize what the games where about.

I'm a Katniss/Peeta shipper at heart but there is an understandable amount of tension between these two people, I feel that they could perhaps...click under the right circumstances, lets see how it goes then!

"Forgive me my friend, though not for what I have done, but for what I'm about to do."

Ragnar Lothbrok."

She thought she had been given a second chance at first, selfishly assuming only she had been given, to what she thought of at the moment, this gift. Hope flooded through her body after the shock had diluted, on a train towards her third, though physically first, Hunger Games.

She ignored Peeta's attempts at conversation, didn't speak when Haymitch entered the compartment drunkenly, no recognition was on his face at the sight of her and was calm as Peeta lost his mild disposition to strike their mentor. He muttered something and kept his eyes on the boy, hitting him back.

This is when she was meant to step in, but she didn't, still in shock over the fact that she had been here once before, perhaps the Capitol caught her, this was all just some induced vision. Katniss wondered what would happen if she didn't react.

Haymitch vomited and ignoring Peeta's curses, she lugged him to his compartment, still trying to be calm. She had done this many times before in fact, but apparently here she had not. Washing him was always awkward, he gained awareness of his situation when she pushed him onto the bed, wet and naked from the shower. He looked confused for a moment until she threw some clothes towards him, expressionless as his dressed.

"Enjoying the show Sweetheart?" He sneered, flopping back onto his bed once his buttons where mostly attached. It seemed so real, she tilted her head and thought for a moment as to what she was meant to say.

"Highlight of my life." She muttered dully, angry all of a sudden and for that she was thankful. It was better to be angry than to be scared, she hated being weak. With that she left, falling asleep on some couch she tried to ignore the nightmares that plagued her mind.

She ignored Haymitch and Peeta the next morning, eating breakfast quietly, Haymitch's snide remarks were easily ignored and his snorted. Writing her off as a lost cause, she smiled at this, eyes very hard.

Peeta looked distraught over this and Katniss ignored the pang in her heart, he was dead and broken, there was no longer the boy with the bread and suddenly here he was. Katniss didn't know how to deal with the emotions so she closed them off. It was an illusion, it had to be. This made things easier to deal with. She didn't understand though why she was reliving this scene of her life in particular.

Then again, reliving her life seemed to be exactly the kind of punishment she wanted least in life. Only Snow would think of something so cruel. Still, aside from questioning her sanity it was easy to stay calm, the realism of the situation collided with the fact she had experienced everything before. Like De Ja Vu switched on. Seeing dead faces made her feel distant from it all.

"Relax Peeta" She muttered, the first thing she must of said since being reaped. Peeta's head turns in shock at the sound of her voice, apparently distracted from yelling at Haymitch for a moment.

"I'm sure Sweetheart" She stresses the word as she sneers at him, drink in hand watching her with amusement. "Does not appreciate your efforts to include me." She takes a drink from her coffee, sighing at the sweet, rich flavor in her mouth.

"Of course your included! Its ridiculous that our mentor isn't even trying to help you!" Katniss looks at him for a moment, confused, he was meant to feel for her later on.

'But then again hadn't he loved me from the start?' She wondered how she could of missed the clear distress in his voice, but not for himself, but for her.

No wonder the Capitol ate up their star-crossed lovers act, not on her part but his, the fact that he loved enough for both of them, Katniss felt very sad in that moment, the kind that tightens your body and lets a weight drop in your stomach. It was so obvious, how had she not known.

"I don't need help Peeta, I'm not going to win the games." She says, trying to tell him that she didn't want to win. If this was a second chance, maybe it was better she died, Prim wouldn't die, District 12 would be around, it wasn't right or fair but better than the future she had come from.

"I don't want to win the games." She re stated, more to herself than anyone else, and this was true. Once your named is reaped, the sentence is set, being a victor means nothing other than your life sentence is expanded longer than your tribute at a price, she realizes, isn't worth paying.

He seems stunned at her statement while Effie looks confused. 'Ridiculous' She exclaimed, her wig giggling a little at her sudden movement.'Who wouldn't want to be a victor?' Haymitch is paying attention to her know, a serious expression looking out of place on his face.

"Why not? Your a survivor! You hunt! You have the best chance to win out of any of the tributes!" He seems confused, Petta with his kind eyes looked so confused Katniss couldn't look at him anymore. He knew her from the beginning, his love wasn't born from some mendacity, it was a choice. He choose her and all she did was hurt him.

"Because I had to be Peeta." She says, looking at the table, staring at the wood like it personally offended her, and in a way it had, the smooth, decorative piece probably cost more than every house in the Seam combined.

"I have done my duty, my sister is safe from the Capitol, there is nothing else to do." She winces at the dry tone she uses, her voice doesn't sound like it should. Peeta slams his hands down and the table shakes a little, his emotion displayed makes it easier to close off. She lets him feel for both of them.

"But you don't understand! Prim needs you, how could you leave her!" His desperation doesn't make sense to them, and it really doesn't to her, how could she explain without sounding crazy? Prim...She halts for a moment, her little duck did need her, but she could survive, she was strong, what she really needed was to be safe from the gleaming eyes of the Capitol.

"No Peeta you don't understand, your living in a dream world." She laughs cause its funny, that she would of accuse him of being the unstable one.

"Wining the games means nothing, if Haymitch is anything to go by all it ends with is your family dead and being an arse." She looks and the man himself and his pale face and keeps her voice even, though it is a difficult feat to do.

"I don't think I am capable of being some Capitol whore Peeta." He gasps and Haymitch's eyebrows shoot up, surprised that this apparently hidden information was known to me. She mentally scoffed at this, guessing that telling a tribute of what life they would live reduces their will to live.

If she had known, would she have been so willing to win, probably, but after living through it things were different, she doubted that if Haymitch told her bluntly about what happens to Victors that she wouldn't even understand what he was saying. She would take the warning, but ignore it, after all, didn't they all think that they were the exception?

"Cat got your tongue." She says, sarcasm dripping from my tongue, turning to look at him now, angry at his ignorance.

"How don't you know this! How isn't obvious to you! Think Peeta think! How do they manage to get, what? 73 victors to play the game with a smile on their face at the end?" The table is silent, Effie's mouth hanging slack against her face.

"What, or better yet whom do they threaten to keep them quite! How could they not scream and kill the twits who cheer for them if there wasn't something else at stake?" She is breathing heavily now, and turn to Haymitch, a man who means everything to her and yet nothing at the same time.

She didn't want him to think she was a fool, she wanted him to know that her actions were for some reason other than reluctant suicide. She wanted to have some semblance of meaning.

"The way I see it, the Games are not a punishment but a method of control, balance is a delicate thing, and while fear and oppression worked wonders you need something more to keep going, Hope." She smirks, remembering what Snow once said to her, long ago.

"A victor doesn't win the games Peeta, they are the reason the Games are still going. The small, meager hope that the victors represent stops the people from rebelling against them. Funny how things work, right Haymitch?" He doesn't respond immediately, still in shock she supposed. Then again this view was one formed by Snow himself and she doubted he was inclined to share.

She ignores them as she leaves for her room, taking a bottle of alcohol from the cart on her way, and regret kicks in. She shouldn't of said those things but it was too late, they needed to be said. With that she waits in her room, till Effie collects her and she starts from the beginning again.

She thought that by this point, nothing could faze her, that she was hardened to it all, though this though was abolished at the sight of Cinna, alive walking towards her. He viewed her, naked and plucked like a chicken before offering lunch, this was when she spoke.

"No" Her voice surprised herself, she assumed standing in front of him would render her speechless, cause her to burst into tears and beg for forgiveness, but he doesn't know who she is, at least not yet. He raised his eyebrows and Katniss was stuck but the sudden urge to explain herself.

"I want to talk to Haymitch before he gets too plastered, it's important." She says, not wanting to tell him that it hurt her, standing before him. Cinna nods at this with some amount of apprehension.

"Are you not hungry? You know that the games do not began till later this evening" He hesitated, she looked down, not willing to respond and in fact not even sure of what she was planning to do.

"It needs to be as soon as possible, without peeta." She looked down while speaking, wondering if she should of mentioned anything at all, she just couldn't handle being in the same room as him, she had watched him die...

After a moments silence, he agreed, calling in the flock of birds to work their 'magic.' There was some talk but she was short with him, focusing on the thought that she would be away from him, sooner rather than later.

A while later, dressed as a pretty pig about to be slaughtered, she waited, ignoring the mirror in front of her. They gushed around her but Cinna kept quite, observing her. Katniss noticed how Cinna was acting differently to her than how if first was with her, that the special bond didn't seem present anymore, but Katniss was okay with this, it hurt less she supposed.

"Your free now, the Opening Ceremony is in an hour and I believe Haymitch is with the other Victors on the other side of the chariot section." His voice was smooth and comforting, Katniss felt her mouth go dry.

"Thank you" She whispered, hoping to convey everything she felt in one word. Cinna smiles and she leaves them, trying to avoid the suspicious looking Peacekeepers as she walked towards her mentor.

She walked towards faces she knew with a frown, ignoring them as she eyed her mentor. It only took her a moment to realize every tribute was still in make over mode, their teams using every minute given. She realized she should be more thankful for Cinna listening, but then again he always had.

They observed her and she did what she did best, acting sullen and unapproachable. Haymitch seemed in a contemplative mood, more so than usual. Chaff and Finick seemed to be attempting to cheer him up and a few victors watched in interest. Haymitch, dark and bitter was usually drunk around now but for some reason he was sober and quite, not something they had seen in quite some time.

That's the thing about victors, they might not like each other, after all, not many pleasant people have won the games, but they accepted the fact that the others understood like no one else could. Another thing about victors, they didn't change, or lose the act, after all, they where always playing the game.

When his newest tribute approached them, an unpleasant expression on her young face, the reaction in Haymitch, his back straightening, his face turning into a growl the few who were paying attention guessed they found the source of Haymitch's behavior, they watched the interaction, curious.

"What the fuck are you here for?" They are surprised at his aggression towards his tribute, snarling at her like a mutt. The girl doesn't react, just leans back on the bar and flags an avox, smiling lazily she replies dryly.

"The refreshments Sweetheart." They don't understand Haymitch's laughter, or how he relaxes, their interest grows. He relaxed because he was worried she would start shouting some anti capitol shit and cause trouble. He was wary of her, still contemplating what she had said previously that left him feeling angry but even more so, empty.

"Relax Haymitch I'm playing nice, you should too." Her mild comment flagged something inside of him and he growled. Play along is what he got from the statement, he watched her drink a glass of what ever capitol concoction was on the menu.

The girl frowns at the taste.

"Jesus even their liquor is fake." Her reply causes another chuckle from the resident drunk, he seems relaxed him her company, they knew each other well apparently. The victors didn't need to know it was the first real conversation they have ever had and one party of it was being blackmailed into it.

"Though Ripper would tear you a new one if she saw you drinking this shit." He snorts, hailing over more drinks of a stronger variety he wears an expression of exasperation on his face.

"She never knows when to stay out of other peoples business." Sweeping his hair off his clean shaven face he seems more coherent than he had in what, a decade? Most assumed he was a mostly lost cause, stumbling around till he died. They were not exactly wrong.

"Please Sweetheart, you are her business." The girl replied, taking a disgruntled sip of her drink. The man frowns at this and responds after a drink. Play nice.

"True, don't tell Cray that though, Ripper acts like he just preformed a toasting whenever he is around." Katniss nodded in understanding, guessing Haymitch understood that her thinnly veiled comment. Play nice or I will cause trouble.

"Can't blame her though, even old Sae plays nice." She shivers a little for effect, understanding that this created some mystery, that Haymitch was more than just a drunk. Usually he wouldn't give a fuck about what they thought of him but the girl was dangerous, she was playing the game well, it caught his attention and he guessed she wanted to catch theirs as well.

"You would think that the head of the Peacekeepers would frighten you more than that old cow." He mused. The girl snorted and glared half halfheartedly, finishing her drink.

She was very real, not playing an angle seemed to be her angle he realized. He could tell they were interested in the exchange, Finnick watching and Gloss glaring, tributes don't usually present their presence to other districts victors.

They could give away her strengths, and that was when Haymitch understood, she wanted them to see this side of her. It was different than the freakishly dull chick with a quick temper, she was portraying something she was not which would be passed down to the tributes, overwriting their own opinion of the girl who volunteered. It helped that she manipulated to conversation to somehow downplay their district's head peacekeeper. Surely she didn't know that other districts didn't have such relaxed heads? Afterall, there was some safety in being the forgotten district.

"Please Cray? Have you seen Old Sae? I rather be in the Hunger Games than face her after Hawthrone ripped her off." She says, his face grows serious and they both think the same thing, game time. Haymitch is letting her lead, but she honestly has no idea how she wants to play this out.

The only reason for running to Haymitch was to get away from Cinna, she realized she was playing a game and for some magical reason Haymitch was playing too. She didn't know why, but it was instinctual by this point, she never stopped playing.

"Well congratulations kid, your in them, still rather this than Old Sae?" His tone serious and she lets her expression match his.

"Meh its not like this is a surprise now is it?" She says, smiling wiry. It never was and Haymitch seems slightly confused, though I suppose it could be considered contemplative.

"Just didn't expect them to call on Prim, thought it would be most assuredly me." Haymitch scoffs and stares her down. "Please kid you stand a chance, Prim wouldn't even make it to the countdown." They are quiet for a moment. He wasn't lying though surprised he even remembered her sisters name.

"How is your mother?" He says, all of a sudden, the tone in his voice is one that is wary, nervous even, she looked at him for a moment, guessing the angle he wanted to play.

"Wishing you never won the games." Haymitch sighs and looks almost sad, but then again my statements is true, had Haymitch lost instead of Marges aunt things would of been different, she wouldn't of run away from a place so familiar into the arms of a man who lost his older brother in the same games, my father.

He knew the story, the whole district knew, he probably put two and two together after eyeing the token she donned unlike last time was something he noticed.

"Hey you wouldn't exist if it wasn't for the fact that I won the games." He says, ignoring the way the victors reactions to this statement. Eyes wide, a few chuckles and some gasps, after all, they did look scarily similar, attitude as well, they didn't need to know that everyone from the Seam looks like this.

"Arh yes but like everything connected to you, apparently I'm destined to die." Her remark was dry, smiling at the way this played out. "And as fun bonding is with you, I'm going to grab something to eat, any advice before the ceremony?"

He finishes his fourth drink and barks out "Try not to get in a fight, game makers will punish you ten fold for it later."

She frowns and says, "Thought you said it didn't matter, there is no chance of me coming out alive from the games?"

The victors watch, not comprehending. Some of them did have children and nearly all of them had been reaped, it wasn't a coincidence but most trained them to survive, not embrace death.

"Perhaps, but you will regret it later if the game makers make you a target, there are some pretty nasty ways to die you know."

"Fine, I'll try not to stab someone, try not to choke on your own vomit." She sneered at him before leaving, he chuckled as she walked away.

"Horrible kid isn't she? Nothing like her mother." He speaks to Chaff, who is still and not responding.

Haymitch was smiling hard now, he didn't want to play apart of her angle, which is what he realized this was all about. It would spread, and nothing could beat the prestige of having a parent as a victor, even a drunken one, the sponsors would wail in attempts to save.

It wasn't impossible to believe either, her own father was dead, her mother had left the town to be with someone from the Seam, parental heritage wasn't too much of an issue in district 12, especially in the Seam, besides, he had no friends and all of Everdeens were dead, the district was quick to gossip, no one would deny it and those who could probably wouldn't, she had just saved her own life. He needed her to keep her trap shut and if this was the cost so be it, he couldn't deny that with a plan like this, the girl deserved to win.

"But so similar to her father." It was Finnicks smooth voice that spoke, quietly and looking at Haymitch with caution. This was his way of asking, and Haymitch knew the others would listen. He snorted and felt very bitter about this situation, it would not end well if he was caught out. Taking the fence he smirked.

"Please, kid never had a father." His bitterness was not missed, he left then, to go drink privately and they wondered how they never knew about this. Haymitch was quiet as he left but had they seen his face all they would think is murder. Haymitch was going to have to speak with his tribute and Katniss knowing this, doubted it would end well.

Chapter 6: Little Talks

a/n:Yes, Cato is back as well and no Katniss does not know this, afterall, she slept instead of seeing the reapings so she wouldn't think anything else was different.

Into the darkness they go, the wise and the lovely. "

Edna St. Vincent Millayy

After being put on display at the opening ceremony, she entered the elevator quietly, not looking forward to encountering a most likely raging Haymitch. As she pressed on the button in the elevator she realized she was shaking.

As Haymitch growling dragged her to his room dread began to fill her. She was used to dealing with Haymitch but that was after everything had happened. He felt no fondness for her now. Ignoring Peeta he slammed the door shut and glared, hate evident in his eyes.

The room was similar to hers, though lacking the stench of alcohol. She sat on the beds soft satin sheets and let her hands run over the soft fabric, calming her a little. She remained silent and ignored the man in front of her, wondering what she was meant to say.

"Nothing to say?" His voice startled her a little, it was harsh and Katniss wondered why she was never able to think before arguing, maybe she should of consulted him before dragging him along.

"You seemed plenty chatty before." He continued, watching her stoic expression he decided this wasn't the way to proceed. She was scared as she should be, but he needed answers.

He observed her now, paying attention the kid was smart. Cunning seemed to be the word to describe her actions, but the lively, snarky kid wasn't real apparently. He watched her volunteer for her sister and was disappointed at her dead response, she was dead meat in his eyes until the outburst.

District kids didn't think like this, especially Seam ones, shoulders curled and subcuming to defeat they were dead men walking. She was too skinny and small but not exactly hard on the eyes, her mind was sharp and her acting skills managed to fool nearly a room full of victors. His anger at being used as a scrap goat aside he felt something else, hope that for once he could bring a kid back.

"What are you playing at?" This got some response out of the kid, a sullen expression on her face her shoulders hunched up defensively, eyes troubled.

"I don't even know" Was her muttered reply, snorting he wondered if a more blunt approach would work, nice didn't suit him and he had a feeling it would just freak the kid out.

"Please your suicidal act fooled the boy but not me." Seeing the anger in her eyes made him feel victorious, he was getting somewhere.

"What is your plan then? Dearest daughter." He sneered the words and as she recoiled away he wondered if it could be possible, though he doubted it, he never had relations with Everdeens wife and had always been careful to avoid such a situation. Any bastard of his was better off not knowing, he wasn't a particularly maternal person and any kid of his would just end up dead in the games, which bought him to his current situation.

"Sorry to disappoint you but pairing yourself to me isn't going to help, Capitol isn't fond of me Sweetheart." His lie rolled off his tongue, it would help actually, he was too old to be any worth to the Capitols amusement, but she most defiantly wasn't.

"It wasn't how I expected it to play out, it just kind of happened, deny it." Haymtich stared at her, her nonchalant attitude pissing him off now actually.

"Bit too late for that." She flinched at his biting reply and took a breath, face empty again. It was a little unnerving to see but, some small part of him calculated, beneficial to being in the games.

"Maybe, doesn't matter anyways, I don't want to win." He snorted and opened his mouth to say something unpleasant but she cut him off.

"Prim was reaped and I took her place, that's it, save your breath and go find something to drink." Bitterly he wondered why his only ever tribute with some potential had to be some suicidal winy bitch. Anger gone, he thought briefly about her outburst, rebellious thinking indeed.

"Watch you tongue or Prim is dead, you know that right?" He decided to let her entertain the idea of death, this kid wasn't gonna die, some instinct told him so, she was too dark, too grim to just die. He would play her angle, he would get her out alive because he refused to let her die before him.

He had done his duty for nearly 25 years, he could not die until the touch was passed on, he wanted out and he knew that this is the one, the only one who could win. Because if she won, he would be free, guiltless in knowing that she was fully aware of her fate, if she still choose to compete it was on her, not him.

With that, for the first time in a long time he had resolution, cause he was tired and she was as well but he was selfish. No one who won the games wasn't. With that in mind he shooed her away and she left, relived, unaware of the determination set in Haymitch's mind. Not knowing the consequences of her actions.

In her bed, she had no dreams, exhaustion taking over, worries of her sanity going away into blissful emptiness.