A/N: A shout-out to charliesunshine and Akalchemist for reviewing and following/favoriting this story. Thank you, it really means a lot!
I try not to scream, try to keep my mouth shut, as the name processes. Primrose Everdeen. This is so much worse than if Katniss had been reaped. Because now it's my fault that she is going into the arena. My fault.
Every fiber of my being wants to yell out for Katniss to not volunteer, but I know it will be useless. I feel terror consuming me. Katniss is going into the Hunger Games, and it's my fault! If only I had been stronger. If only I had been better. If only I had not forced Katniss to protect me in every way possible, maybe she wouldn't feel like she has to do this now.
I force my feet to move. The crowd has parted, and I see people's mouths moving, but I can't hear what they're saying. My ears are ringing, and I can't hear anything except for the name. I am moving through the crowd towards the stage, forcing myself to stand tall and hold my head high. I am just mounting the steps, just thinking that maybe Katniss isn't going to volunteer after all, when I hear it.
"Prim!" It's her. Here it comes. My sister sounds as if she is choking, but as I turn around, I see her rushing forward. She meets me, her eyes wild, and shoves me roughly behind her. I stumble, but manage to keep my footing.
"I volunteer! I volunteer as tribute!" she gasps out. I scream. I wrap my arms around Katniss's waist and refuse to let go. After a pause, I choke out the words.
"No, Katniss! No! You can't go!" I shriek. Because if she does, she will die. Maybe I can keep her from going, maybe I can convince her to stay and let me go. But even as the desperate thoughts run through my head, I know it is useless. Nothing can convince her to stay here. Nothing at all. I don't even know if it's legal for a volunteer to back out. But I can't just let her go. I have to try to keep her here. My grip tightens around her waist.
"Prim, let go!" Katniss snaps at me. Her tone is so unlike the tone that she usually uses when she speaks to me, I'm shocked. My grip loosens, for just a moment, but it's a moment too long. I feel someone pulling me off of her. I scream as I am yanked away from my sister. I'm shrieking for Katniss, trying to wriggle out of the iron grip, but it's no use. Dimly, I hear Gale's voice.
"Up you go, Catnip," he says, in a weak attempt at cheerfulness. Then he is pulling me away. Away from my sister, away from the stage. I scream at my captor, who I have identified as Gale, but it's no use.
"Let me go! Go back! She can still stay! Let me go!" The tears are streaming down my face, but Gale ignores my cries. He just drags me away from Katniss, and no matter what I do, he won't go back.
"Why did you take me away?! I still could have saved her!" I shriek, as he sets me down. By now we must be back where my mother is, but I can't tell for sure.
"I still could have saved her," I sob. "She's going to die and it will be your fault!"
"Prim, it's going to be okay," Gale says, trying to stop his bloody nose with his sleeve. Vaguely, I realize that I probably hit him in the nose while I was struggling to break free of his arms. I should feel bad, but I just glare at him through my tears. This is his fault, almost as much as mine. If he hadn't pulled me off of her, if I hadn't been so weak, if he had tried to convince her to stay, if... But I'm not being fair. He didn't do anything wrong.
Gradually, my tears subside, but they leave me feeling every bit as bad as before. Katniss is going to her death right now and it's all my fault. Finally, I calm down enough to see Effie Trinket leading Katniss and a blond boy who I don't recognize into the Justice Building. I bury my face in my mother's shirt, trying to block the events of the last hour from my mind.
I hear the Mayor making the normal end-of-Reaping speech and then we are released to go where we please. I step slightly away from my mother and wipe my eyes, looking at Gale. "Sorry I hit you. It wasn't intentional," I tell him honestly. "And I shouldn't have said those things about it being your fault. It wasn't fair." Gale just smiles sadly at me.
I manage to get my face relatively clear of tears before my mother and I begin walking towards the Justice Building to say our goodbyes. Gale follows behind us, but he lets us go into the room with Katniss alone. He understands that we want our privacy.
Katniss opens her arms to me, and I climb up onto her lap, hugging her tightly. I try not to think about how this might be the last time that I ever hug my sister. My mother sits down next to us and pulls us both close to her. We sit, as peacefully as the circumstances allow, for a few minutes, and then Katniss starts talking. She seems so strong, even though she has essentially just received her death sentence. She tells me that I can not take any tesserae, no matter what. That I can sell my goat milk and we will live. I agree, not because I want to, but because I have to. If I refused, I don't know what she would do. And I know that we can make it by without tesserae. Somehow.
Then Katniss goes on, talking to my mother for a bit about how Gale will bring us meat and such. I tune out of the conversation, just savoring the feel of my sister's arms around me, of my head on her shoulder.
I hear Katniss sounding very intense, and start to listen again. She's glaring at my mother.
"Listen to me. Are you listening to me?" She demands, fear evident in her voice. My mother nods, looking almost frightened herself. "You can't leave again!" Katniss yells. She screams at my mother about staying herself, not leaving like she did when my father died. She acts like I'm not right here in the room, like I'm no more than I toddler. Finally, I can't bear it anymore. I take Katniss's face in my hands.
"I'll be alright, Katniss," I say, trying to calm her. "But you have to take care, too. You're so fast and brave." I think of how she can go under the fence without a second thought, of how I have always envied her courage. "Maybe you can win."
"Maybe," she says, but it is obvious from her tone that she has already given up, that she's just humoring me. "Then we'd be rich as Haymitch." She's trying to be upbeat.
"I don't care if we're rich," I state vehemently. "I just want you to come home. You will try, won't you? Really, really try?" I'm trying to get her to promise, to feel like she has to win for me, because I know that if she does promise, she won't back down. She'll try as hard as she can to come home to me.
"Really, really try. I swear it," Katniss says, and I let out an inward sigh of relief. She's going to try. She's going to really, truly try.
A peacekeeper comes in and tells us that we have to leave. And then we are hugging each other as hard as we can, and Katniss is telling us she loves us, and I'm desperately trying to hold on to my sister, but the peacekeeper is pulling me away.
"I love you, Katniss!" I scream before the door slams shut. And then Katniss is gone, and I know that there is a very good chance that I will never see her again. Trying to win likely won't be enough. The tears are streaming down my face again, and I feel like I'm choking, but I force myself to at least kind of keep it together until my mother and I make it back to my house. I can go to pieces there, but I have to stay strong for now.
A/N: I'm sorry that it's short, but I like to end chapters where it seems natural, and there wasn't another good stopping point for a while. Please review! :)