08. storelined streets
(implied spoilers for chapter 16)
He has a ring in his sock drawer.
It's stuffed in the back, way way way in the back, squished against the left corner.
If anyone asks, he'll say he's never seen it before.
If anyone asks, he'll swear it isn't his.
If anyone asks, he'll tell them it's his mother's, his grandmother's, a cousin's, an aunt's, some family heirloom that somehow found its way in his possession.
If anyone asks, he hopes he'll come up with a credible story.
(He hopes she isn't the one who finds it. He doesn't know what she would - no, he. He doesn't know what he would say.)
If anyone asks, he was drunk when he bought it.
It was all Hughes fault, really.
(And he actually was drunk.)
He can still remember the night. Or parts of it, anyways.
(Memories of Hughes are like that. They get mixed up with the dreams, the ones that end in ash and crimson pavement.)
It was snowing. Or hailing. Or maybe it was raining, but he's sure it couldn't have been that, because if it were then he'd remember complaining about it.
... maybe it was raining - a light drizzle, perhaps, not heavy enough to bother him...
Either way. All he remembers is looking up at the sky at some point and thinking that the stars we falling.
Hughes had been babbling about Elysia, again. Even drunk, he remembers being smart enough to tune him out. Come to think of it, being drunk probably made that easier.
He doesn't know how the subject changed, when the conversation turned against him. All he knows is that one second Hughes was gushing over the picture Elysia drew last week and how she would make such an incredible artist when she grew older and would he like to see some pictures she is just soooo cute and talented and didn't he wish he had a daughter as amazing as her - and then he was being ushered into a jewelry store.
Before he knew it he was standing in front of the engagement rings.
Really, knowing Hughes, he had probably planned this from the start. A friendly hey how are you it's been a while we should go out for drinks tonight, quickly followed by another hey how come you don't have a girlfriend yet. The sneak.
(Another thing he will never admit: Hughes had been leading him to the necklace - or maybe it was bracelets, he hoped it hadn't been earrings - section. A nice present, he had said, something sparkly, he had said.
But he was the one who made a beeline for the rings.)
He still remembers the conversation. Clear as crystal and ice and sharp winter skies.
(Words don't rot quite as easily.)
It went something like:
Heeeeey, Roy, you didn't tell me you found someone already.
I didn't.
(pause. then, the mistake.)
(hewasdrunkhewas drunkhewasdrunk .)
She doesn't know yet.
Oh? (a quirked eyebrow. a curious Hughes is never a good thing.)
Do I know her?
...no.
Oh, who is it!
I'm not telling. (at least he was sober enough to bite his tongue. not like it really mattered, because soon enough - )
Well, which one are you going to get? How about that one? (and he pointed to a huge, gaudy ring smack dab in the middle of the display. the knuckle-sized stone was the color of peaches.)
You're kidding.
Yeah, it does look pretty expensive -
It doesn't suit her.
No? (a smirk. a curious Hughes is a dangerous thing.)
Why not?
It's too... too... (he failed to find a word that would accurately describe the ostentatious ring) It's... it's not her. I need something simple. Pretty, but simple, you know? A rock that big would just get in the way -
Get in the way of what? (the smirk widened to the likeness of a cheshire cat.)
(and you know what they say about cats and curiosity)
Not telling.
(he clammed up, after that, ignoring Hughes prodding like he had ignored the night's precious Elysia anecdotes.
yet they didn't leave -
or rather, he didn't leave.
he was looking through the rings - dammit why was he looking? - contemplating...)
(then)
How about that one?
(Hughes was pointing to a ring in the corner. he was surprised he hadn't noticed it before, but once he saw, he couldn't take his eyes away. it was perfect. a golden band, no, not quite gold, but rather a metal that was almost the exact same color as her -
three diamonds were embedded in the ring, instead of poking up like awkward mountains. lined up like constellations, they wouldn't snag on blue sleeves or get caught in -
the more he looked at it, the more beautiful it was.)
Yeah. That's it. It's perfect.
(and Hughes was smiling, smiling. not smirking, but smiling.
although there was that look in his eyes - )
(Hughes being Hughes, there was only one thing left to say.)
Well? What are you waiting for?
It took all the cenz in his pocket, all the money in Hughes, and two trips to the bank, but he did it.
He remembers the weight of the box is his pocket as he carried it home. Maybe it was then that he looked to the sky and thought he saw stars falling. He recalls making a wish -
(because isn't that what he is? an idealist? a dreamer? the kind of person that does silly things like wishing on stars?)
So, Hughes had said, what are you waiting for?
He didn't answer.
He didn't know the answer the next day, either.
He remembers waking up, staring at the box on his bedside table, the confusion, then
remembering.
Shock rolling in like a tidal wave, embarrassment like the undertow, because god he was such an idiot and surely if Hughes didn't know before he knew now and -
He remembers grabbing the box, to throw it against the wall, set it on fire, something, something, make it go away and then he could pretend it never existed because the fact that it existed and he bought it and it was perfect meant that
meant that
He remembers tense knuckles and fingers curling around velvet and
stopping.
Stopping and
opening the box and
looking inside.
Because it was perfect. So perfect.
He has a ring in his sock drawer.
(he considered installing a lock for the drawer, but figured that would just be overkill.)
It's stuffed in the back, way way way in the back, squished against the left corner.
The ring is in a box and the box is velvet and the box is wrapped in a silk bag and the silk bag is in a package and the package is tied with string and he hopes no one will ever find it.
(Hughes never mentioned their little shopping trip again, but he's pretty sure that's when the taunts shifted from get a girlfriend to get a wife.)
If anyone asks, he'll say he's waiting.