Well this chapter isn't as long as I intended for it to be but after I accidentally deleted it last night and went on a raging search through my computer to reclaim it...I'd say that it's just best that I go ahead and upload it while I still can. In fact I believe I'll just upload a chapter each day, or maybe every other. I guess it all depends on whether or not you guys like it, huh? I certianly hope you do.

BPOV:

I couldn't believe that what I had seen just before the blackness consumed me, was anything more than a figment of my imagination. It didn't make sense that Edward would come back for me, now of all times, like a knight in shining armor. I had always imagined him to be just that, my knight, but that was before he had left, before my life had been shattered from the very fibers that held it together. He had cut me deeper than any wound I had ever experienced and I refused to believe that he would come back for me. It wasn't right. But at the same time, I couldn't deny the overwhelming feeling that I was no longer in our meadow; that I had been moved. This feeling only grew stronger as I heard another familiar voice.

"Why did you ever leave her?" a voice that was distinctly Alice whispered from somewhere nearby.

My heart fluttered as though a hummingbird had just taken up residency within it. I hadn't any idea where I was exactly, although I could only assume that I had been brought to the Cullen's house, but that didn't make any sense. I assumed however, that if I was insane enough to imagine them, it wouldn't be too far off base to be in their house either. Perhaps this was where the engulfing blackness had brought me to. These voices, the overwhelming feeling I was now experiencing, they all added up and in their entirety I found more confusion than I did meaning. I didn't understand where I was or how I was now hearing Alice's voice.

Even more apparent however, was my own fear. I wanted desperately to open my eyes so that I was no longer envisioning Alice, but seeing her in her current form rather than the one from my memories. I wanted to open them so desperately, so acutely, that it was hard to deny this yearning. What if when I opened my eyes, this alternate universe I now believed myself to be in, vanished from my grasps?

My best friend might have left me behind but it was a pleasure utterly unexplainable for me to be able to hear her soprano's voice for at least one last time. I didn't dare open my eyes in for fear that I might lose her all over again. For the time being it was enough to simply drink in the sound of her much like a drunkard would his beer.

"I don't know how I managed to ever walk away from her. Seeing her again is nearly unbearable as I see all the suffering I've inadvertently put her through. I can't begin to imagine what Charlie must think of my right now. A coward maybe? A predictable bastard? I'm not saying I'm undeserving of such titles, I only believe he might think differently if he were able to understand." Edward murmured.

His voice was closer than Alice's, just off to my side. It's velvet undertones rang in perfect clarity through my thoughts. Even then I didn't believe him to be either of those things that he named. I knew the real Edward, I knew that he was not a bastard. He may have hurt me but I would never consider him as anything less than I had before.

"Edward," Alice said presently, "I'm not Charlie, I know that. But I do want to understand what was going through your head. I'm not blessed with the gift of reading minds, I can only catch glimpses of the indefinite future. Please...Enlighten me?"

He sighed tentatively and I almost expected that that would be the only thing Alice would have gotten from him until he spoke again. Although I couldn't blame him much either. Alice was definitely a force to be reckoned with when she was denied something she sought after.

"When I look at all the times we've implicated her life...All the times she could have died at my hands or at those of another vampire...That's not how things are supposed to be. She shouldn't have to risk her life to be with me and I don't want her to. Her life is something I would not easily jeopardize; I had always thought that. When Jasper tried to attack her it only made everything that much more real for me.

"I wanted her to live a life without all the dangers that we inadvertently brought into it. She's so pure, so self-less that I knew she would give up everything for me and I couldn't have that hanging over my head for the rest of eternity. I thought that leaving her would effectively change that. She would move on: she had to. I never would have thought that things could end up this way or maybe I just didn't want to."

What the hell? What kind of sick imagination did I have? Hearing their voices brought me a great overwhelming sense of contentment but I couldn't stand listening to the words that Edward spoke. They were laced with so many untruths that I almost despised my fantasized Edward for so much as uttering them. My eyes fluttered open only to be met with deep fiery pulls of golden topaz.

"How are you feeling?" Edward asked me.

I rolled my eyes. Wouldn't he already know the answer?

"I'm fine. Just fine."

Now it was his turn to scoff. His eyes glared down at me and I hated that he held the upper hand leaning above me. It made him look so much more fierce than I.

"You know how much I hate that word when you use it. How are you really?"

I scowled at him. The words in my vocabulary were not there for his personal liking but for my own habit of using them. A few choice terms came to mind however and I would have shared them too had Alice not chosen that precise moment to intervene.

"Edward stop being such an idiot. She doesn't care what words you like for her to use."

The sound of Alice's bell-like voice beckoned me to turn and drink her in with my eyes. I longed for nothing more than to see my best friend again, regardless of the fact that she was nothing more than an apparition of sorts.

I craned my neck so that I could see around the icy boulder that was Edward, and took in her petite figure. She was standing off to my left, leaning against the cotton-white wall. Her expression was devoid of any emotion but in her eyes showed a great happiness. I smiled at her tentatively.

"I never thought I'd get to see you again." I whispered, belaying to her the truth of how I felt, "And I'm glad that I got the chance to one last time."

"This isn't the last time you'll see us." Edward spoke, "We're here to stay. All of us."

I hadn't missed his emphasis on the word 'all.' All of them? How was that even possible for me to imagine them each? That meant that Jasper and all the others had returned as well. I couldn't say that I hadn't been expecting it. If there was anything I knew about the Cullens, was their tendency of staying together. What I hadn't been expecting was that I might someday imagine them all as well. Perhaps that was what cancer did to you? I had previously believed that Edward came to me to keep me from danger, to help me hold up my end of the promise we had made, but now I wasn't entirely decided. If I'd of had my way I wouldn't have imagined Rosalie at all. Apparently that didn't matter to my subconscious or to whatever it was that brought me these figments of people I once loved.

"I don't understand how it is that I can see you all. You only ever appear when I'm in danger."

Looking around to survey my surrounding I found no immediate dangers. I was undoubtedly in the Cullen's old living-room, their furniture still coated with shear plastic covers. It seemed as though everything were being preserved and perhaps that was why I was capable of seeing them. My memories of them would surely be stronger here.

"Bella I don't know what you're getting at or what you mean by danger, but we're here. Myself and the rest of my family. We've returned to Forks. I couldn't bear to stay away from you any longer." Edward said gently.

I already harbored the pain of losing him, the pain of everyone else's suffering, and now the pain of his return. I didn't believe that there was any more misery that my already tormented heart could handle.

His eyebrows hung in confusion, a familiar 'V' forming between them and I looked at him evenly.

"Stop, just stop. You have no right to say those things to me. You're not real for Christ's sake! I don't want to hear lies. Just leave me be." I growled at him. Yes I wanted to see them all again but at what cost to my sanity? My heart? It would be better if they'd just leave me for good.

"What are you talking about?" He exploded, "Of course we're real! Dammit Bella I know that I've made a lot of mistakes in my life and leaving you just happens to be the greatest of them. But I'm back now, trying to seek redemption for what I've done and you think I'm lying? That's the most idiotic thing I've heard!"

Alice groaned and with that, instantaneously regained my attention.

"Can't you see Edward? The danger? She connects danger to you-,"

"She should!" Edward interjected.

Alice hissed at him before continuing, "-and when something dangerous happened she could see you. I'm not saying that I understand it completely but I am saying that I can put two and two together. That's the only logical explanation for what she is saying. She doesn't believe that we're really here and I can't say that I blame her."

"Excuse me? As much as I would just love to sit here and listen to the two of you converse about me, there's really other places that I have to be." I interrupted.

Both of them glanced back at me as I spoke. Edward's expression was one of great pain that I'd have to live several more years to ever fully comprehend. I didn't like knowing that I had hurt him but hadn't he hurt me already? Everything comes back at you in the end.

"Bella please believe me when I say that we're not some figment of your imagination. We've truly come back this time. I can't stand being away from you anymore." He murmured gently. There was so much truth soaked into his words that I had a hard time denying them.

What if he really had returned to me? But that didn't make any sense to me either. He had claimed that he didn't want me, didn't love me and now he was practically tearing himself up as he leaned over me? The easiest explanation had been that he was only my envisioned Edward telling me what it was that I wanted to hear, but was that really the most logical? Now as I looked back on it, I didn't quite think so.

"Fine we'll say that hypothetically you are real. What other reason would you have me believe that you're here for? It sure as hell isn't for me, you merely stumbled across me in the woods. What's your real reason for being back?" I asked him again.

A growl raged in his chest but I didn't cower. It didn't matter what his reasons were, I was still absolutely certain that he would not harm me.

"Why can't you believe that I've come back for you Bella? I love you and my deepest regret was having left you behind. I've come back to beg for your forgiveness and I won't stop until I've achieved just that. You are my reason for coming back, never doubt that."

"So what? You've come back out of guilt, seeking your redemption? How self-less of you." I sneered. All that old anger was starting to be reinstalled in my heart and I had finally found the opportunity to release it. Edward real or otherwise was quickly taking on the role of my verbal-punching bag.

"To say that I don't feel immense guilt for what I did would be a lie and I will not lie to you. But I have not come back out of guilt, only the hope that you would take me back in your life. I don't have some sort of ulterior motive; you are my reason for existing and I've come to seek you out. Why can't you see that?"

"Seek me out? Really Edward, just give up already. I don't want to forgive you and I surely won't offer as much to you simply because I'm going to die."

His expression was so furious, so enraged that I immediately regretted my words. He had never looked so much like a vampire until that very instant and it terrified me to see him as such. My vision of him had been seriously flawed.

"Surely you're not still on that? Dammit Bella! I've only just returned and you're already pining after eternal damnation? I left you for your own good and I'm not going to change my mind on the vote of your immortality! Death is simply a part of life; it's the normal way to things." He snarled at me.

"Edward!" Alice cried. Her lower lip was quivering as her eyes revealed a great sorrow. "I don't think that's what she was talking about."

Edward's eyes searched my face, searching it for something, though I hadn't any idea what he found there.

It was about time someone understood what the hell I was getting at. Of course I didn't seek immortality anymore. There was no reason for me to exist after they had left me. They had taken everything with them, my heart, my soul. Death wasn't something I feared, it was simply a timely escape from the world I no longer wished to be a part of. How stupid I had been, wishing for an eternity.

"Am I to believe you didn't already know of my cancer Alice?" Edward gasped and I turned to face him, "Yes that's what I meant. Cancer. Say it with me now. Cancer. I'm not asking for immortality, I'm asking that you allow me to leave. I don't want to be here right now."

Somewhere nearby while I had been speaking, I'd only dimly picked up on the sound of shattering glass. It was surprising that in a house full of steady vampires something would break, but at the moment I had been too absorbed to consider it.

"Bella I didn't-," Edward choked.

I scowled at him as I squirmed out from under him. There was no reason for me to be here any longer. I needed nothing more than to leave and the front door seemed only too inviting.

Both vampires had to have been certain of my intentions but as neither moved to stop me I bolted. Although the definition of the word was clearly defined as having ran away quickly, I came to a dead halt instead. I hadn't meant to pay any mind to my surroundings but as I made for the front door, it was hard not to catch of glimpse of Esme standing in the entry-way, a puddle of water and glass at her feet, pink tulips strewn across the floor.

"Esme..." I breathed shakily. As soon as I did so, strong cold arms encircled me in their icy embrace. I stood stock-still.

"My daughter, I'm so sorry. We wouldn't have left. We didn't know." She cried into the crook of my neck.

I pulled away from her gently my hands pressed lightly against her shoulders. To say that I had missed her would have been greatly insubstantial to how I felt but I couldn't let that affect my judgment. I knew what it was that I had to do and I wouldn't let myself get swayed from it.

"Esme, I'm truly sorry. I'm sure that you didn't know, but that doesn't change that fact that you left. You all left. And I wasn't able to pick up the pieces after that. I'd like to say that it doesn't hurt me to be here right now, but the truth is that it does and I can't do this right now. I don't know why you've come back and although I'm glad to see you...I'm worried that you were expecting something different than what you've been met with. I have to go and I'm sorry." I said finally as I turned my back on her.

I closed the distance between myself and my blessed exit, wrenching open the door roughly. Tears that I had hoped to conceal shed freely from my eyes as I retreated from their house. For whatever reason they might have had for returning, their sudden reappearance in my life wasn't for the better.

Turning my back on him, leaving his family in their living room gazing after me, was very possibly one of the hardest things I had come to do. I had always claimed that moving on, becoming adjusted to a life without Edward was the hardest hurtle that I had surpassed. This was of course, true to a point; I had always seen him as a great portion of my life and leading one without him was beyond my capability of imagining. But when the news of my new-found cancer had risen, this became the most difficult. It wasn't just hoping to live, it was so much more. It was having to face everyone's pity for my condition, face the reality that Renee and Charlie were already sent into flailing grief for a life they thought I would lose. Having to face this all and still face my own overwhelming doubt in my capability to live through it, I found this the most difficult to take in.

However, Edward had come back and there was still the possibility that he hadn't known of my illness. I didn't like to believe this, like to feel the first shards of hope beginning to surface in the pit of my stomach. If he hadn't come back out of his guilt for leaving me in such a condition, than what other reason would he have? This was the question that kept echoing in my every thought and demanded my concentration. He had left me and though I hated to admit it then, in his absence I had been completely and utterly broken. That is not to say that in his sudden reappearance that I was now healed. Instead, the inner-turmoil that raged on was evident enough that I was being sent back to stage one, all over again. I didn't know that it could be bearable for him to resurface in my life so suddenly, were he to leave again. There was already so much grief swelling in the depths of my soul, that I couldn't stand the outlook of more being added.

It was idiotic all on its' own that I would be holding his reappearance in such high regard. I was searching, looking for any sign that he had returned for me and only me. I couldn't help this foolish yearning within me, this wanting for him to be here because he needed me just as desperately as I needed him. I couldn't have been his reason for returning, or at the very most, I couldn't have been his only reason.

And what do you think? I'm sorry if this chapter comes across as a little rushed to you...I am on a caffeine buzz right now...What can I say? Please take the time to review and tell me what you think. Even if you were just dropping in to say something as simple as "Hi," it would still mean the world to me. Also if you came across any mistakes, please feel free to notify me. Please: REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!

Thanks for reading,

~Ash

xoxoxo