"Tell me a little bit about yourself, Dawn." Dr Nathan Greene, one of several juvenile psychiatrists working at Grey's Psychiatric Hospital, asked pleasantly.

"I already filled out one of those form thingies when I came in. I put all my details on that." said Dawn. Although, of course, she knew that Greene wasn't asking her about where she was born, or her telephone number or medical history. He was obviously asking about why she was checking herself into a juvenile psychiatric ward.

"Of course." Greene replied. "But that information is merely factual. Why don't you tell me why you're here?"

Ah well. Dawn knew she would have to tell someone at some point. They could hardly help convince her that she existed if she didn't tell them that she wasn't sure she did. "Well, I'm not sure that I exist." Dawn said slowly. It sounded rather foolish, now that she came to say it aloud.

"Oh? A sort of reverse solipsism, is it?" Greene commented. "Solipsism means-"

Dawn cut him off. "I know what solipsism means, thank you. And no, it isn't. If I was solipsistic, I'd think that only I existed and everyone else was a figment of my imagination. Therefore reverse solipsism would mean that I think that I'm a figment of everyone else's imaginations. Which I don't."

"So, would you mind telling me how exactly it is that you think you don't exist?" Greene asked, not missing a beat.

"Um... Well, see, I think I was created. By monks, from a ball of magical energy, to hide me from something. I don't know what, or why. I've been having these dreams..." Dawn said, blushing. She was fully aware of how silly it all sounded, which was partly why she was here. It sounded ridiculous, but she was nevertheless convinced that it was true.

Greene paused for a second. As a juvenile psychiatrist, the most common cases he had to deal with were anxiety or eating disorders, occasionally severe depression or a particularly bad case of OCD. Schizophrenia wasn't something that Greene commonly dealt with. While Dawn was in the right age group for schizophrenia to manifest, it generally started more gradually than this. Dawn seemed to be having full blown delusions, one of the primary symptoms of schizophrenia.

"So, these dreams. Would you mind telling me a little about them?" Greene asked. "When did they begin?"

"A few months ago. They're exceptionally vivid, just as if I was awake. They're all about these monks, and they use this ball of energy - me, I think - as a focal point for their rituals. Then, recently, I dreamt that they cast a spell to send me away, put me in human form as me, to hide me - hide the ball, they called it the Key - from something." Dawn replied self-consciously.

"Are these dreams the only reason that you believe... what you do?" Greene asked.

"No. I also know things. I've learnt languages that should take years of study in weeks, and become intimately familiar with certain historical periods. At the same time, other languages and other eras are more remote. I could learn them, you understand, but certainly not at the same rate I learned everything else." Dawn answered. She felt more comfortable talking about that - after all, she could easily demonstrate her aptitude. However, it would be far easier to shrug off the dreams as mere dreams if she couldn't.

"Your file says that you got a perfect score in your SAT's and were offered a scholarship to UCLA. Is that correct?" Greene questioned.

"It is."

"So you're evidently a bright girl." Greene expanded.

"I suppose so." Dawn mused, wondering where exactly Greene was going with this.

"Did your parents ever pressure you, or set out a plan for you to follow?" Greene asked.

"God, no. My mom was happy, of course, but she would've been happy if I'd just passed my SAT's normally. And my dad... I don't really think he cared. He's not really home all that much, and he was always closer to Buffy than me anyway." Dawn replied.

"And how did that make you feel? Your father's indifference, that is."

"Dunno. Never gave it much thought. I guess, after him spending so much time fussing over Buffy, it just seemed kind of natural that he didn't really notice I was there." Dawn answered.

Of course, the reason why Hank hadn't really been close to Dawn, had spent more time with Buffy, might be because Dawn actually hadn't been there. She might've been sewn into his memories, whereas Buffy had actually been in them. Dawn hadn't considered that possibility before. She wished she hadn't thought of it now. She certainly didn't mention her doubts to Greene, even though she was fairly certain it would come up in a later therapy session. This was, after all, only a preliminary discussion.

"And how's life at university? How are you handling the course load?" Greene asked, jotting down Dawn's response.

Dawn shrugged. "It's okay. The classes are interesting when they aren't ridiculously easy, which I've got to say is most of the time. The course load isn't bad, and the work's pretty easy anyway."

"And the people? Have you got friends, formed any relationships?"

"No, not really. I never really bothered at high school, 'cause, I mean, they're jerks. They teased me for being clever, and for not being all cool and fashionable. Same kind of thing at university really. I enjoy being with my sister the most, 'cause she's interesting. Even if she is years younger than me." Dawn replied. She didn't mention that she thought that the reason that she had never formed close attachments to anyone but her sister was because Buffy was the Slayer. Being around her was supposed to keep her safe from the Abomination, whatever that was. So no one else could fit into the picture.

"I see." Greene said neutrally, making a few final notes before saying "Alright then, it's about time for your physical, and then we'll show you around the ward."

Dawn swallowed, then nodded. It was too late to back out now.

~*~

As Dawn was having various scans done, she wasn't sure whether she wanted them to find something or not.

Dawn knew she had several of the symptoms of schizophrenia: delusions, hallucinations (in the form of exceptionally lucid repeated dreams), a lack of interest in people, and not emotionally caring about anything very much. She was pretty sure that none of her family had schizophrenia, which ruled out the cause being genetic. But she could still have something wrong with the structure of her brain, or something wrong with her neurotransmitters. Dawn was pretty sure that having the wrong quantity of dopamine or serotonin could lead to schizophrenia.

But Dawn didn't know if she wanted the scan to show either of those things or not. If they did, then she was crazy. She didn't want to be crazy, she really, really didn't, but if she was, then Dawn could be treated. She could get better.

But if they didn't find anything, then Dawn might be sane. She might really be the Key, and everything she knew - everything she thought she knew - was just a fabricated memory. Dawn, as she thought of herself, wouldn't exist. She would be a lie. Dawn didn't know if she could deal with that. She didn't know if she wanted to deal with that.

Of course, the causes of schizophrenia were still largely unknown. They might not find anything, but that didn't mean that Dawn wasn't crazy. So, even if the scans showed everything was normal, Dawn would still stay. See if she could get better. See if, eventually, someone could convince her of her own existence.

~*~

As it turned out, the scans showed nothing out of the ordinary.