So when they got there the writing on the door appeared and it said: Speak friend and enter. So they sat there for an hour or two while not-so-genius Gandalf tried to open the door.
"What's the elven word for friend?" Frodo hinted at long last.
"Ummmm…..,"Gandalf thought for a long time.
"Ooh, ooh, ooh, Mushrooms! Mushrooms!," Pippin cried, jumping up and down.
Suddenly something big and octopussy came out of the lake.
"So I guess that story about the Watcher in the Water is true," said Gandalf.
Legolas jumped up. "Mellon, Mellon, Mellon!" he said quickly.
The door opened and everyone ran in.
The floor was covered in dead Dwarves.
" Fred, Bob, Jordan, Steve, Joe….."
"Legolas, what are you doing?" Aragorn asked.
"Naming the dead Dwarves," Legolas replied.
"Oooooookay", said Aragorn, "Hay, isn't that a tomb?"
"Wahhhhh," Gimli cried.
"What's wrong?" Legolas asked.
"Balin is dead," Gandalf replied in his not-to-smart-sounding know-it-all voice.
"Zombie Nerds!" Pippin and Merry yelled together.
"Where," cried Boromir excitedly.
"Those are orcs," said Aragorn.
"Ohhhh," said Boromir in a disappointed voice.
Merry and Pippin hugged each other and started crying.
"Get a grip," said Gandalf. "Hay-yah!" He screamed, going into a matrix position and beckoning the orcs with one finger. Quickly he hit three orcs over the head with his staff.
"Well there goes the first three," said Aragorn.
"Ouch," added Legolas, wincing; an orc had kicked him. Then he realized that there was mud in his hair and he started slaughtering orcs by the dozen, leaving the rest of the Fellowship temporally free to take a rest.
Suddenly a red light came from the end of the cavern and a Balrog walked in. Everyone, including Legolas, had enough sense to stop fighting/resting and run for it.
When they got to the bridge across the chasm, Gandalf stopped like the not-too-smart-guy that he is and said, "I am part of the secret fire, you shall not pass."
The bridge broke and the Balrog fell.
"You just got schooled, Balrog!" called Sam.
Then suddenly the Balrog's whip wrapped around Gandalf's leg and our not-so-smart-wizard fell to his death.
Boromir, like the psycho that he is, jumped in after Gandalf.
"What a dumb thing to do," said Pippin.
Gimli sighed, "Well maybe if he hadn't gotten drunk before we left Rivendell, even though he knew it takes him a month to recover……"
THE END