A/N: Thank-you to my reviewers! I hope this installment lives up to you're expectations. This is the first story I've written where I haven't planned it out, every bit and piece, into a nice little package, it's all free-hand, flowing right out of my brain so, it may be in some differing contexts, etc. This chapter, as with the second one is fairly mild in rating, it does get steeply higher rated though quite fast, for further reference.
Part 2
Hugs, arms pulling bodies close, old scents and too much heat. From one person to the next it made me ill. First Ginny and then bombarded with brothers, my father, grandparents, old friends of the family, aunts uncles, until at last I got pushed to the outer edges.
My throat aches for liquid but I sustain myself. My body aches from the extensive weight lifting I forced myself to do that morning. Forced myself to lift and lift and lift until it burned so badly that I could take my potion with real reason, that I could let myself be lost.
Ginny sits down in a chair next to mine and starts talking to me but my mind is too far gone to understand my own replies. My eyes, however, can still somehow take in the fact that her already slim figure is now deathly looking her eyes seem to have sunk so far into her face that the shadows surrounding them are permanent. Somewhere it hurts, it hurts to see her like this and a wave of guilt engulfs me.
I can't take care of you. I leave; I left you here with my parents, my dying parents, to be overwhelmed with their sickness. I've sentenced you to a life you don't deserve, already lost, already a whisper, forcing a dead body to continue on, at the age of seventeen.
My chest is tight and in seconds my head is hanging between my knees and I'm coughing. My head reels in pain. Around me everyone is gathering an angry silence filling the room, only to be broken by my coughs. My whole body shakes, shuddering violently in round after round of pain until at last my lungs seem to have enough air to allow some wheezing breaths.
My mother's arm has found it's way around my shoulders and she is holding a cup of warm tea, my sister has water, and in front of me the rest of my family watches in concern, I take a sip of the tea before standing up taking a few staggering steps and walking up to my old bedroom where my stuff is, where my potion is. Behind me I know they are talking to me- "Ron, are you ok?" "Just sit down, relax," "Has that ever happened before?" "Ron-"
I push open the door to my room and go straight to the bottle sitting on my old, cracked school desk, I tip it back letting long slow drops slide down my throat, only setting it down when I feel the hand against my back.
"Ron?" The voice is soft, quiet as a whisper, and when I turn, she's standing there.
"Hermione, what are you doing here... In my room?" Her gray face tints slightly pink as she replies.
"I suppose when I apperated, this was the room in my mind."
"Oh," I can't think of anything else to say. I stretch out on my bed still watching her out of the corner of my eye. She goes and sits on the edge of the bed putting one hand lightly on my stomach, pinching the gray fabric of my shirt between her fingers.
"You look..." She trails off watching me as I watch her.
"Tired," I finish for her and she nods.
"Tired."
"And you, look organized," I say eyeing her professional looking business suit and short hair smooth and flat against her head. I want to take my hand and run it through her hair until it turns curly and frizzled again, but I don't. She stands at this and straightens.
"Well, I was and then-"She stops abruptly, mid-sentence but I know the words formed in her head, 'My plan was interrupted.' 'By my brother killing himself,' I add in my mind. "Well, I should go say hello to everyone," She turns stiffly and starts to towards the door, but stops when she gets there.
"I've missed you," She breathes. I turn propping myself up on my elbows and look at her. I don't reply, but I don't need to, we both know what I would have said if I had replied.
She shuts the door and as she does I get up and grab my bottle.
"You wouldn't miss me if you hadn't organized me out of your life." I say to the angry silence left in her wake.
The liquid slides down my throat easily and I float away on a gray cloud.
A/N- Continued: More to come soon, please review, it takes me hours to write this, it only takes seconds to review!