A/N: Hello everyone! Many apologies for not updating sooner. This chapter is twice as long so I hope that makes up for it being so late.

This chapter starts off a little different but I hope its not too confusing. Just to clarify the confused reader, no one's memory has been lost! So don't worry about that. There is also a lot of clues and symbolism in this chapter for things that will happen later on. So try to keep that in mind while reading.

No Beta so many apologies for any mistakes. I tried my best to proofread this like twenty times but there still might be some mistakes.

Remember Rated T for swear words! (Though a very strong possibility it will become rated M later on)

He is laying on a soft bed of grass under a summer sky. The sun's vibrant rays are shining so brilliantly, he could feel the heat warm his skin. His arms are stretched toward the expansive sky. He doesn't know what hes searching for, but if he reaches far enough then maybe it will become something tangible. To another set of eyes, the particular scene could be thought as beautiful, picturesque, and yet it makes him feel incredibly sick. Feeling light-headed, he grabs his head, the brightness becoming too much to handle.

In the distance he hears a child gigging. It isn't long before said child is hovering over him with large bright eyes that peer into his own. "What are you doing there?" The young child questions. His expression is all curiosity and delight.

"I...I don't know." He replies, though he is shocked by his own voice. Is he also a child? He doesn't remember anything about himself but he is sure he is in a place he does not belong.

Once reaching toward the distant sky, his hands now reach for the boy's outstretched hand. The child's small fingers wrap around his own and he helps him stand. Closer now, he studies the boy's features. Long tamed black hair frames the boy's chubby pale face. It is unlike his own messy brown hair that has grown much too long from his years of neglect. He isn't sure how old he is, but he assumes they are the same age. What bewilders him is he has never seen this kid before and yet he knows him.

"I haven't seen you around here before! My name is Mana." A large grin stretches across the boy's face. "What's your name?"

His name?

"Allen." He responds instinctively. Though he is not sure why he said that name. All he knows is that it was his.

The kid, Mana, makes an 'o' shape with his mouth as if he is in complete disbelief. "That's a cool name!" He shouts, much too excited for something so minor.

Before he can finish giving his thanks, Mana grabs his hand and pulls them both into a sprint. They run for minutes before they come upon a garden, much more beautiful than the field he was in moments earlier. Mana pulls him to the ground where they lay side by side, their hands entwine. Allen watches the strange child chuckle merrily and he's not sure why but he begins to laugh himself, so incredibly hard in fact, that his sides starts to hurt but he doesn't care. For the first time in his life, he takes comfort in the fact that he isn't alone.

"Why did we run?" Allen inquires once they manage to catch their breaths.

"Our babysitter, Alice, won't allow us to hang out with the neighbor kids." Mana states in a manner as if he is sharing common knowledge.

Us?

"Mana, what are you doing out here?" Someone asks. Allen turns his head toward the direction the voice comes from. There is a boy who, except for his short hair, looks just like Mana. The child catches sight of him and narrows his eyes. He walks closer to them though his movements say he's acting with caution. "Who are you?"

Mana grabs his hand suddenly and pulls them to their feet. The movement was so quick he feels light-headed again. "This is my new friend, Allen." His grip tightens on Mana's, his instincts are screaming at him, telling him to not let go. "This is my twin brother, Nea!"

Nea, however, ignores their introduction.

"Alice has been looking for you." Nea informs his brother. "You should return to the manor before she gets more angry."

"Eep!" Mana squeaks with exaggerated fear. The dark-headed child lets go of his hand and Allen immediately feels the loss of his soothing warmth. How long has it been since he has felt human touch? "Allen," Mana voices quietly, a tiny smile on his face. He doesn't say anything further and the silence makes him feel a hammering in his chest. Is this a farewell? It feels much worse than he could have imagined.

Allen reaches for Mana to hold onto that warmth once more but his hand swipes through the empty air. The boy is already gone.

Panicking, Allen tries to run anywhere just to find Mana again. His head turns turn in every direction, his eyes frantically scan the perimeter. His chaotic thoughts are broken, when a hand clasps around his wrist. He turns around to find Nea staring at him with a small smile on his face but it doesn't comfort him the way Mana's had. Allen realizes he doesn't like Nea's smile.

"Where's Mana?" The question is spoken near silently. Nervously, he fiddles with his hands, his shirt, anything to not look at the boy in front of him.

"Allen was it?" He simply nods in agreement. Nea leans in close, lowering his voice as if there are spectators nearby. "I can take you to him."

Allen knows, somehow, that following Nea is a bad idea. He thinks that maybe his parting from Mana should have been final and another part of him feels that their meeting should have never happened in the first place. He decides that against all risks that he will go wherever Nea takes him because there's this burning need to see Mana again. Allen follows after the boy, studying his back as he follows from a short distance. Eventually they reach the end of the bluff he didn't know they were standing on. He gasps at the the vast murky sea several kilometers below. It stretches out as far as the eye can see. Nea points eastward. There is a small island that stands out stark against the blue, on it a lighthouse stands alone.

"There. Mana is there." The boy says and Allen looks up at him and suddenly finds that Nea is no longer a child and neither is he. He looks down at his own hands, one is normal and the other is ugly and disfigured. The site pains him for some reason and there is nothing on his hands but he can smell the strong iron of blood.

"He's not who you think he is, you know." Nea frowns momentarily before another grin returns on his delicate face. "Don't worry, it won't be much longer." Allen isn't sure why the statement makes him feel uneasy but he knows that whatever it means, it is a promise. 'Run' His conscious is demanding, but his legs feel heavy and he can't move.

Before he realizes it, Nea twists his fists into his shirt and pushes him over the edge of the bluff. All of a sudden he is falling toward the dark sea below. He wants to scream but he can't seem to find his voice. Once more, he reaches for that powder sky, trying to grab a hold of it so he can't fall any further. In return, he receives nothing but the harsh lashes of the cold winds that whip his face.

Allen crashes into the water below with so much impact the air gets knocked out of his lungs. He tries to swim, he needs to catch his breath, but like an anchor he continues to sink in the darkening abyss. Again, he tries to escape but the the salty water burns his eyes and he can no longer see. Desperate now, he thrashes skyward, but the water is never ending and the surface is no where in reach.

He wants to cry for help. He wants to feel the warmth of human touch again but he knows that its a pointless wish. Allen has never felt more alone.

It isn't long before the darkness consumes him.

Light floods his vision. It is so blindly bright that it hurts.

Where was he?

Who was he?

A weight is pinning his arms down and there is a blurry silhouette above him. The person is calling for him but he can't respond or stop the salty tears that are rolling down his cheeks. He squints to focus on the person above him. It is a man who looks familiar, yet he can't remember who he is. His dark hair is tied in a high ponytail, two long strands hang alongside his bangs. The stranger's face is slightly feminine but also so very masculine. Despite being a man, he is beautiful, ethereal almost.

His finger's twitch to touch the stranger's face, just to confirm if he is real. It reminds him of how he had once reached toward the sky except the man is very much tangible. The dark-haired man flinches at the contact but allows his curious hand to curl around his face. Briefly, Allen closes his eyes, relishing the warmth. The dark-haired man's countenance remains stern, yet there is a small hint of concern on his face. He doesn't speak any further but searches his eyes as if he is trying to determine something.

Is this man concerned for him?

It isn't until Allen brushes his thumb across the soft skin, that the man reacts.

"Moyashi, What the fuck!" The man growls and smacks his hand away.

Moyashi.

The foreign word triggers something in his mind and a flood of memories return to him. He is Allen Walker, a former exorcist of the Black Order. He is on the run for treason. There is a Noah who has taken residence in his brain and is waiting for the right moment to take over his body. The man above him is Kanda, someone who he could never define as a friend or a foe. And yet, just a second ago he desperately reached for Kanda, needing to revel in his warmth...and Kanda let him!

Allen scoots back into the headboard so quickly its as if the mere site of the Japanese man has burned him. The only thing that does burn is his face from embarrassment.

"Idiot! W-Why-Why were you watching me sleep?" He yells loudly in attempt to sound angry but he is so embarrassed he can't seem to do so.

"Dumbass, you were thrashing in your sleep." The samurai explains. "I thought the Fourteenth was taking over." The Fourteenth. Nea. The images of the dream spin in his mind, never ending flashes from that dream make his chest ache. Lighthouses, Manors, gardens, and the sea. If it was a dream then why did it all feel so real?

"Oi..." Kanda vocalizes, the sudden sound almost scares him. Then it dawns on him that Kanda is here and he isn't alone and for some reason the fact comforts him. Unlike Lenalee and the others, the Japanese man doesn't care and hes not going to try and comfort him. Nea and Mana, he just doesn't want to think about them anymore.

"Don't do that again. It was creepy waking up to your stupid face..." He mumbles, rubbing his eyes. For some reason, they sting.

"Che. Imagine how I felt when you were caressing my face." The older of the two quips, his face twisting into a scowl. Allen's eyes widen and his face becomes even more hot with the added embarrassment.

"Shut up!" Instinctively, he reaches for a pillow and smacks an unsuspecting Kanda in the face with it. Really, he only tolerates Kanda's company because despite everything the man treats him the same as he always has and he doesn't feel like a basket case like he does with Johnny at times.

"Stupid beansprout! I'm going to make you pay for that!" The dark-haired man's face has contorted with anger, his nostrils flaring. They're back to their tussle again, throwing their fists and insults back and forth. Kanda charges forward and pins him to the mattress, his hands hold onto Allen's arms and his knees dig into his thighs. Allen stares up at the man, trying to wriggle out of his hold. It's been a few nights since he thanked Kanda for staying. He wasn't sure what came over him, but it was something he had wanted to say for a while. Allen knows Kanda doesn't have to be there, but he suspects the situation with Alma has something to do with it. The thought of Alma pains his chest.

"Not so tough now, eh, beansprout?" Kanda sneers.

Suddenly, he realizes just how close Kanda is, their faces are only a few centimeters away from each other, any closer and they would touch. He tries to fight the crimson shade from staining his face. They've both sparred many times before but this time feels so much more personal. A multitude of thoughts crosses his mind. He knows Kanda would kill him if he apologizes, but he still feels terrible about the whole situation with Alma. Neither of them deserved to suffer the way they did and even if he says they are 'free' it doesn't make him feel any less. He still isn't sure what the Japanese man's motive is for helping him and he's not sure he ever will. Allen turns his head to the side because he's not able to meet that cobalt gaze any longer.

"Get off, dick." He seethes.

"Weak." The blue haired man responds, but he doesn't move. While Allen can't see Kanda's expression, he can practically feel the confusion radiating off of him. Where the hell has Johnny been? If the bespectacled man had been there he could have avoided this awkward situation. As if on cue, the door swings open and Johnny walks in.

"I brought food-" The scientist stops in his tracks and drops the bags of groceries he was holding. For a moment, Allen wonders just what has startled his friend, until he remembers what. There's no way for him to stop his face from flushing this time. Kanda is still on top of him, to anyone their position would look inappropriate.

"I'm sorry! I-I didn't know!" Johnny squeaks frantically shaking his head back and fourth as if he's shaking the images out of his head.

"Didn't know?" Kanda echoes unaware of what is going on. 'Go figure,' Allen thinks. He squirms out of the Japanese man's grip and shoves him off, making him fall hard on the ground. Surprisingly, he remains there, though true to his nature, Kanda insults him and kicks him in the shin. Allen thinks that even though he isn't acting like it, Kanda might actually be a little embarrassed himself.

"No, no! It's not what you think. This idiot wanted to spar." Allen lies, its easier than explaining the situation. Its bad enough Johnny found Kanda on top of him in bed, but he surely doesn't want Johnny to know they ended up that way because he stroked Kanda's face! Oh God.

Johnny breathes a sigh of relief. "Okay. I just thought that maybe I missed something." He chuckles, returning to his same old self.

"Never! What would give you that idea?" Allen rushes to his side and helps the scientist pick the food he dropped on the floor.

"For starters," Johnny pushes his glasses up to the bridge of his nose. "your face is all red! And then there's the fact that you-"

"Ugh, you two are annoying. Let's just eat." Kanda interrupts. For once, he is grateful for the samurai's terrible temper because he is sure he was about to die from embarrassment. "And by eat, I don't mean garbage you just dropped on the floor!"

How they ended up at a bar in the red light district, Kanda doesn't know. He was eating delicious soba at some Japanese restaurant that they miraculously found in the city. Then, Johnny decided they should celebrate their 'strengthening friendship' by drinking at a bar. Kanda refused but then the beansprout and Johnny had started to leave without him! He couldn't let them go on their own because the idiots would probably have found a way towards trouble. Now, here he was a quarter of the way through a mug of beer, wondering how the hell he ended living his life according to those two morons.

The bar is grand and full of patrons to the brim; it isn't a typical establishment. There are plush red couches, each with their own table. Kanda thinks the couches are a ridiculous addition to have in a bar. Its a place to get intoxicated, not a home. So, it doesn't come as a surprise to him that Johnny had chosen to sit on the ugly red things instead of at the bar. But that wasn't the worst part of the place. There are waitresses who serve drinks and their accompaniment to their patrons. Not to mention they do it very little clothing. Having a surprising appreciation for women, it really is no wonder why Johnny picked the place.

The scientist is wedged between two women on the couch while he and the beansprout sit on another. From his peripheral vision, he notices Allen seems to sit out of place, much more quiet than he has been in days. Even though he's physically there, he can tell that his mind is not. Considering his apprenticeship with Cross, he figures Allen is unaffected by places like this. But he wonders if there's something more.

With Johnny occupied, it's basically just two of them alone again. It's been days since Allen thanked him and he still hasn't managed to have a proper chat with the beansprout. He knows this is his chance to say something, but as always the words remain at the tip of his tongue. His thoughts return to that morning. Seeing the teen writhing violently in his sleep made him feel an undefinable twinge in his stomach. He was sure that the Fourteenth was taking over, especially since he knows the tears that fell from his eyes were definitely Allen's. Then there was that strange physical contact. It's the closest him and Walker have ever been in a situation and while he didn't think much of it earlier he wonders now, just who was reaching for him. Was it Allen or the Fourteenth? It's still a mystery how close to the edge the kid is from giving in, but as time goes on he finds it is becoming much more difficult to reach for mugen.

He would be lying if he said he wasn't relieved when the idiot came back to his senses. There's still so much left unsaid between the two of them and he hasn't even begun to change that. Kanda takes a swig of his beer. He glances over at Allen and sees him shuffling a deck of cards Johnny had gotten for him that morning. The white haired teen's curious mercury eyes turn to meet him and Kanda's about to force some words out but before he could say anything, a server practically tackles Walker.

"Hello, Sir!" She shouts much too loudly, her breasts are practically suffocating the kid but he makes no move to push her off. Eventually she peels herself off of him but she's still touching him like he's some sort of prize. "Would you like any refreshments?" Allen declines, but she doesn't leave. Instead she continues to talk to him, playing with the strands of the teen's hair and tracing the scar on his face, going on about how amazing his look is. What was worse was he was humoring her! Who knew he had it in him? Of course, that only made her come onto him even stronger. Ugh.

So, he actually waits for him to stop talking because if he tells he woman to 'fuck off,' the beansprout will make a huge deal about it and give him some lecture on how to treat women, again. Please, he knows how to treat women, it's just that women could be so troublesome. Maybe its the drink that's at work but he continues to listen to their conversation because he's still determined to suck it up and talk to the damned kid.

He's not sure how much time went by but he's already halfway through another mug before hes noticed Walker has scooted too close to him. As if he's read his mind, the teen mutters something but its too entirely quick for him to understand. Why is he so damn fidgety? He looks over to his right and sees exactly why. The young server who had chatted with Allen all this time had definitely gotten passed the point of chatting. She crawls toward him with her very gracious chest mostly exposed. Her hand that rests on his thigh traces small circles before it trails up and up...

Allen squeaks and practically jumps in his lap, spilling the remainder of Kanda's drink all over him.

"Fuck!" Kanda growls. The alcohol spills on his crotch and its freaking cold! He jumps to his feet to dump the pool of beer that hasn't been absorbed by his coat yet. "Fucking idiot, what are you doing?"

"Kanda, I'm sorry," Allen throws napkins at him haphazardly. "It's just that she-"

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry!" The server who was groping Allen says, before she crawls over towards him to try and dry him off. Her hands nearly fondle him just the way she did to the idiot beansprout and he smacks them away.

"Fuck off!" He yells harshly. The woman practically shrinks under his glare but finally, she scampers off. He snatches the remaining napkins from Allen and tries to dry off his damn crotch. He's had enough of this place now. Forget trying to talk to the idiot, he's going to go back to their hotel. Really, the kid is lucky. If it hadn't been for the drinks in his system, he would have ripped his head off.

"I thought you were used to this shit." He mutters, still drying his pants.

"I'm used to it happening to Cross, not me." Walker huffs and stands up to his full height. If that could be called full height, hes still shorter than Kanda. Still a beansprout.

"Whatever. Let's just get out of here."

"Uh, Kanda..."

"What?" He demands, but his question is answered when hes looks at what Allen was pointing towards. Johnny nor the women he was with are there anymore. "Where the hell did he go?"

How could have not noticed that Johnny had left? He was so wrapped up in waiting for the server to leave so he can have this awaited conversation with beansprout that he had forgotten all about the older man. He curses under his breath, he was so careless. Being with the two of them was like watching stupid kids and he hates kids. He tries to think back to that night and when the last time they saw Johnny was. Allen starts walking in the opposite direction, but Kanda quickly grabs his arm and drags him through the crowd. If he doesn't keep him close, the stupid kid would probably get lost in the place and end up getting fondled by other drunk people.

They had searched the entirety of the bar twice with no luck. Johnny was gone and they had no idea where he went.

"I think that was one of the ladies that was with him earlier," Allen points toward a woman with cropped blonde hair. Kanda begins to walk toward her but Allen stops him, giving him an almost disbelieving look. "It's better if I talk to her." Whatever.

From afar, the samurai watches as Walker approaches the woman with his disgusting fake smile. They chatted momentarily before the teen's face blanches and he runs for the exit. Kanda follows after him, bumping into a few of the patrons on his way out. They run to the alley between the bar and some other building. Its mostly dark except for the single lamp on the wall, eerily illuminating the small space. Under the light, they see a figure on the ground clutching at his sides.

"Johnny!" Allen exclaims, running for the man who, except for his glasses and underwear, was very much naked. He lifts the man into a seating position and lightly pats his face to wake him up. A trickle of blood drips down his face, but he finally he opens his eyes, though it's half-lidded and not quite focused.

"Allen! What're you doin' here!" Johnny shouts out merrily then looks up at him and points. "Wow and Kanda too!"

"What the hell happened, Moyashi?"

"It's Allen." The silver haired teen corrects for the first time that day. "And that woman inside said he gambled with some people in there. He obviously lost everything."

"Why would they strip him naked and throw him back here?" His face twists into disgust but its just a mask. It irritates him that he didn't know some morons decided to attack Johnny and that he wasn't there to scare them to death with mugen.

Allen shrugs. "But the owner kicked him out for not having clothes."

"Because those weirdos took his clothes."

"I know, Kanda." Allen is fuming now, the situation greatly upsets him and for once, he isn't trying to hide it.

"Whatever. Let's just go kick their asses and get his clothes back."

"We can't."

"Why the hell not?"

"That woman said they ran out when Johnny mentioned his friends."

"So, what do we do?" He questions, leaning against the cold brick wall.

Allen doesn't respond to him, instead he is saying comforting words to Johnny and soothingly stroking his hair. It really shouldn't, but it kind of surprises Kanda just how different Allen acts toward he and Johnny. He is much more gentle as opposed to his brash roughness when they're together. The fact is, he really knows nothing about Allen Walker or the way his mind works. Allen doesn't hold Kanda up in the same light as he does his close friends, hell, he probably doesn't think much of him at all. It doesn't bother the Japanese man, no he could care less, he's only indebted to Walker, right? Kanda looks away from the scene for some reason its hard to watch.

"Hey, give me your coat." Allen says suddenly.

"Hell no!" He glares daggers but the kid just walks over to him and stares at him challengingly. He's much more serious than he was earlier, the incident with Johnny has really angered him and he knows hes taking it out on him.

"We can't bring him back to the hotel like this." The kid is practically in his face now, ready to fight him for his coat if he has to.

"Give him your clothes then!"

Allen looks down at his clothes and unlike him, the idiot opted out of wearing his winter coat. Instead, hes only wearing a white button up shirt and brown slacks. With how slender he is, its a wonder how he didn't freeze to death. "Then I'll be the naked one, you freak!"

Kanda grumbles under his breath and takes his exorcist coat off. He makes sure to throw it extra hard at the beansprout and it earns him a curse in response. The teen didn't make too much out of it because he's already at the the bespectacled man's side, helping him into the coat. Once done, Allen looks back up to him with some smugness on his face. Kanda wants to punch the expression off his face.

"That wasn't so hard now, was it?"

"Yeah, yeah. Let's just go before I leave both of you behind." He says walking away from two of them.

Walker, with a very drunk Johnny hanging off one his his shoulders, trudge toward him. He practically drops the man but grabs him before he hits the ground. "Kanda, a little help here?"

The samurai groans and swing Johnny's other arm around his shoulder. Johnny holds onto both of them for support but still stumbles in between them as they walk.

"Y-You... guys are my betht friendth!" the older man sings happily. Kanda nearly gags at the strong scent of alcohol the man breathed out. They stumble back to the hotel, earning strange looks from passersby. Its colder than it was earlier and now he's grumbling under his breath because his damn crotch is cold from the beer the idiot spilled on him and Johnny is still singing terribly.

"I think Kanda peed because the coat is wet!" Johnny says leaning in towards Allen attempting to whisper but really he's practically shouting. The white haired teen laughs in response.

"I did not piss myself!" He retorts with much irritation. "And shut up beansprout." Kanda stretches his leg around Johnny, kicking Allen in the back of the leg, but his movement throws them all off balance and they stumble to the concrete ground. Their legs are a tangled mess and Johnny's face has planted in the ground.

"Fuck!"

"Good job, moron." Allen mocks and pushes him off. They both immediately help up Johnny who looks dumbstruck but then starts laughing uncontrollably. Allen looks at him as if he's confused by Johnny's reaction, but the kid ends up losing it just like Johnny. He's not stupid like the two of them so he doesn't join them in their madness, but he does smile to himself. Maybe the night wasn't so terrible.

The way back to the hotel was quiet once Johnny passed out. Once they returned to their hotel room, they dump the bespectacled man on the bed, but he leaves Allen to take care of the rest while he opts out for a shower. The hot water washes over his body, washing away the alcohol stench.

There has been something that had been bothering him all night. His purpose for tagging along with Walker and Johnny was to kill the Fourteenth. Yet, that night he went out with the two of them and sort of, partially enjoyed himself. His eyes close, the hot water splashes against his face. He doesn't want to think about any of this anymore. Enjoying their company will only be disastrous.

Minutes later, he returns to the room and finds Allen on the floor fiddling with his cursed hand. They don't exchange any words or glances, which he is glad for. He's actually tired from the night and the last thing he wants to do is address things that have been left unsaid.