Addison was still in the locker room, lying on the bench, an old, unclaimed sweater propping her head up, when Callie came in.
"Way to hide, Addie," she said, her eyes immediately attaching to her shoes on the tall, usually graceful woman's feet. "Nice shoes."
"Oh yeah," said Addison. "I borrowed them. Heels, I've decided, suck."
"Whoa now," said Callie, abandoning her walk to the locker and sitting herself next to Addison. "What's the matter?" Addison knew she looked like crap. Her hair had been teased from lying on the sweater, she was wearing pink plastic shoes with a white blouse and brown pencil skirt and her eyes were puffy in a way only crying could manage.
"I'm hormonal," Addison said, trying to maintain her poise. "Very, very..." she was quiet for a moment, her eyes glazed over and focused on the locker directly in front of hers. "Very, very…confused," she relented, allowing herself to topple sideways, resting her head on Callie's shoulder. "I don't know what to do."
"About what?" asked Callie gently, offering her other arm for comfort.
"Everything," Addison said, as though it were enough. They both knew it wasn't, but Callie nodded anyway, not wanted to confuse her friend anymore. "It's late," she said instead. "Are you on-call?" Addison nodded. "Well, how about you go to your office, crash on the couch and get some sleep? Think things over?" She figured she could lie on a public bench and mull over her confusions and her seemingly meaningless life, or she could do it in seclusion. At least in seclusion she could change into sweatpants and play Solitaire on her notebook.
Her office was on the third floor, home to a selection of impressive textbooks and an empty photo frame from which she just removed a photo of her and Derek. Her degrees were framed as was customary in a doctor's office, but the only place she actually frequented was the bottom drawer of her filling cabinet, which held usually her surgery shoes, and always a pair of homely, worn sweatpants. She drew the blinds, the room immediately immersing her in a stark darkness, and stripped herself of her skirt, pulling on her pants and removing the pearly clasp from her red locks.
She'd barely been lying on the couch when she startled at a nervous knock on her door. Fortunately, there was a peephole. Unfortunately, she didn't use it, instead swinging the door open, expecting to see Callie.
"Karev," she said with a sigh, blocking the doorway so he couldn't enter. He eyed her pants and messy tresses of hair and she could see an inward shrug, as though it meant nothing that the usually immaculate Addison Forbes Montgomery looked nothing more than a bedridden witch.
"Can I come in?" he asked. She shrugged. "Are you going to subject me to another fricken lecture?" she asked, tiredly, mocking his frequent use of the non-word.
"Will you listen?" he retorted, and reluctantly, she stepped aside shutting the door after he'd come in. He sat himself on one half of her couch, obviously indicating she should occupy the other half. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry," he said blandly, his tone indicating he was anything but. "For…umm…snapping at you. You're my superior. It was…wrong."
"Say it like you mean it," she said, rolling her eyes. "Fine. Go." She turned around and opened her filing cabinet, trying to look intently absorbed in work.
"Addison! What is this you're doing to me!?" She swung around, and he stared her piercingly in the eyes. "For Christs sake, you pull me from pillar to…post," he said, deliberately withholding the expected "fricken". "I just don't know what to expect. I need to know what the hell we are." He paused. She slowly walked over, and lowered herself into the couch next to Alex.
We. He said it again.
"You counted," he proclaimed. She looked quizzically at him. "How many times I've said 'we'. We. We. We. You and me. Now you're analysing what it means, aren't you?" She nodded.
"I kissed you. And I would like to do it again. That is what it means." Alex got up, and ventured toward the door.
"Wait," she said. "Umm…your…" she stood up to hand him the chart he'd brought into the room with him. He took it, but Addison's grasp around it was surprisingly strong. Their hands met over the spiral bind and Addison inhaled sharply, scared to examine the gaze Alex was projecting on her. "It's okay," he said, and his voice contained more certainty than she could remember in a man's voice for an excruciatingly long time. He loosened her grip around the chart, and awkwardly tucked it under his arm. Then he touched her cheek, running two fingers across and down her cheekbone, memorising each dip and curve, concluding the gesture by tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. He took her hand, and gripped it firmly, but gently at the same time and brought them up to his lips, kissing the tip of each finger gently, protectively.
"Ads," he whispered, so softly despite being alone together in her office. "Friends talk, okay? Friends call each other if they need one another. I'm your friend, if that's what you want." He let his lips linger on her fingertips for probably a second to long, before he exited her office, gently shutting the door. On one side Alex leant, exhaling slowly, the taste of Addison still dancing on his lips. He was content, he thought, to be her friend. Maybe what he felt for her could only consummate in an intimate friendship. He didn't care. The overwhelming desire to protect her from everything and everyone was as overpowering as her scent. It would be enough. It would have to be.
A/N: So…Addison/Callie friendship – I really LOVE this relationship. I haven't really delved into it so much because in an upcoming chapter there is definitely a relationship (friendship) that I'm excited to explore! But anyway, at the moment, Callie is Addison's person. Not necessarily by choice, but they are both in a similar boat at Seattle Grace, and naturally they'd gravitate together. But the point is, Callie is her friend, but she's not always THERE the way Alex is. Cause Alex? Is there. Now. And he's saying "We" again. So like Addison needs that. Or the finger kissing for that matter. But Alex, it has been ascertained in the show, is a physical person. Wrestling, sex, that's what Alex's good at. So it's not really surprising that he's trying to convey his feelings physically. It's more of a surprise how gentle and emotional he is though, because gentle, emotional Alex isn't really revealed save for babies and Jane Doe. Anyway I'm rambling, yet again, but the point is, Alex has more or less come to terms with where he is, emotionally. Addison's not quite there. So Alex has resolved to help her get there, whether or not it results in something more, he's happy just to be her friend because he's never really experienced emotion like this before.