The Top 10 Girls of Shibusen (A/N:Eee yay! Someone liked my srupjd humor /)(\ please excuse the loooooonnnnnggggg wait. Also excuse the crappy writing and short descriptions on everything, especially the girls like reasoning and things. I have a tendency to dislike female anime characters so I got kinda biased on the list and I hope you don't mind terribly who got #1, after all I'd initially made this story for the sake of having that person at the top of the list. Also I don't really understand the physical appeal over many of the characters which is why the descriptions are short and everything and I tried really hard to write the story like the last chapter but I couldn't quite manage it so I'm really sorry for the crappiness.) 'Lets start this off the same yet differently, shall we?' The screen wrote. "Aww Kid dont be mad! I was just joking!" Kira said with her arms wrapped around the young reaper's waist. 'The girls are judged a bit differently than the boys since we have a higher population of them. The first 7 are based purely on physical appearance, the top 3 are based on attractiveness, sex appeal, personality, and intelligence.' "Sex appeal?" Maka said with a flat look on her face "there are 11 year olds at this school" "You're just sayin' that cause you couldn't get on the list; you have the sex appeal of an 11 year old." Black Star muttered. "MAAAAKKAAAAA-" "NO! I DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE-" "CHOP!" 'That is where it's different, it's the same in that we shall start from the end and end at the start. So now them, lets start, shall we?' The screen read. "OWWWWWW" 'First one up, at number 10' *drum roll drum roll* "Oh yay it's starting again!" Kira cheered "I never thought about selling girl's pictures but I guess I could make a profit out of this business too!" *crkkkkk* "Only joking! I swear I am out of that business! No more selling pictures for me! Hehehhehehehe" 'Elizabeth Thompson!' In the picture she looked rather bored, sitting in a cafe with a small cup of coffee in her hand. "WHAT?! I GOT NUMBER 10?! LOWEST ON THE LIST? YOU'VE GOT TO ME ****ing KIDDING ME!" Liz yelled. "Hotty with a body" a boy nodded "I do like blondes, and a girl that takes care of herself" "Though I kinda prefer her younger sister..." "No way! Her whole attraction is her 'mothering' side!" "Now now Liz, at least you got on the list. Some people don't and they feel bad about it, not so bad is it?" Kid tried to calm her down. "LIKE HELL! I AM A 10! IT DOESN'T MEAN I SHOULD BE 10th ON THE LIST!" Liz yelled. "Hahahahahahaha hee hee hyahahaha" Patty collapsed in fits of laughter. "WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING AT- KIRA I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL CRUSH YOU IF YOU DONT STOP POINTING AT ME! I WILL NOT ACKNOWLEDGE 10th PLACE!" 'Number 9!' "You're only 4 inches and 15 pounds heavier than me you can't crush me, though most of my weight is muscle..." "NO ONE NEEDS TO KNOW MY WEIGHT!" "Hey this is unfair! Every time we start over reacting Stein beats us! Why not Liz?!" Black Star exclaimed. "Difference being, I actually like her most of the time" 'Jaqueline O. Lantern Dupré!' "But Steeeeiiiiiiiin you ADORE me!" Kira flashed her pearly whites. "Congrats Jacky!" "Seeeee I told you you were super cute!" "I'm forced to put up with you. There's a difference" "I WILL NOT ACKNOWLEDGE 10TH PLACE! AS FAR AS IM CONCERNED THERE WERE ONLY 9 SLOTS ON THE LIST!" "She's got that whole 'sexy school girl' thing going on. Ya get me?" "Dude. She IS a schoolgirl" "I know but, like, Maka Albarn, she just looks prude-ish in the skirt. Jacky pulls it off" "Think real carefully about what you just said assholes" "W-where'd you come from?" "Maka..." "No!" "CHOP!" Her voice and the sound of the blow rang through out the room, though its effect was lost by the 'crkkk crkkk crkkk' that happened moments before aswell as the accompanying blow. "Owwwww I always thought you guys were exaggerating" Liz held her head. "OWWWWWW!" 'Number 8!' "Please let it be Kira or Patty PLEASE let it be Kira or Patty" Kid chanted, again with all his fingers crossed. "I think he actually went easy on you" Black Star inspected the blow. "Huh, he didnt even use his right hand" Kira noted The two looked each other in the eyes and nodded "jackass" they agreed. 'Fire!' "DAMN!" "I'm going to shoot someone" "Are you all idiots that run this thing?!" "A male toddler ranks higher than me!" "FIRE's A BOY!" Kira grabbed Fire and paraded him around as Kilik held Thunder and yelled out a reprimand on the constant confusion in genders. "Awww so adorable!" "I don't know who'd'a voted for him on the list, not even the chick version woulda been on it" "Who's running this thing anyway?" "Ehh, maybe in a few years when she looks like a person and not just a chibi character" "Bets are the boy's gonna be around all the time though..." "Guys... She's like 4" "There are things wrong with all of you too" "Damn damn damn" "Hahhahahahaha" Patty laughed while Kid had another meltdown. "Why's it so bad that Kira or Patty weren't in 8th?" Soul asked him. "Because!" Kid exclaimed "8 is such a beautiful number! It's exquisite symmetry!-(To save time on Kid's love of the number lets just skip ahead and pretend like his whole explanation went on!)- To have women in my home that were placed at such a beautiful spot would be an honor!" Kid declared "well, I guess there's no other option- Fire, Thunder, move into my Manor!" "THERE ARE MANY OTHER MORE SENSIBLE OPTIONS!" 'Number 7!' "Name one" "GET OVER THIS BONER FOR THE NUMBER 8 YOU HAVE!" "Soul! Stop being so vulgar!" "You just called a guy an asshole and beat him to a pulp for calling you a prude. I don't think you're in the position to reprimand people right now" Soul told Maka flatly. "Don't worry Soul, Kid only gets those for me" Kira winked. "...Gross..." "Please don't let it be Kira or Patty, Please don't let it be Kira or Patty" 'Medusa!' There have been few moments that have calmed down the very very strange students during the course of this list's publication: Stein's beatings... that is all. This however, was one of those moments. "NO" "Yes" "No" "Yes" "Nonononononononononono" "Oh yeeeesssssss" "She's the sexiest psychopath I've ever seen" "She revived the Kishin" "And I bet she looked mighty fine while doing that" "No" "She doesn't even go here!" Kira exclaimed "hahahaha that was in mean girls, no but in all seriousness she doesn't even work here anymore". "I think we've already established that this list maker is a total dumbass" Soul replied. "Must be blind too if he thinks that witch's hot" Black Star muttered. "Black Star!" "I said witch! Witch!" "No." "Yes" "No" "Yussssss" *whisper* "No" 'Number 6!' "Kid. Drop it, Fire and Thunder don't want to move into your house" "But the symmetry. I mean they even look almost exactly the same" "Except for the whole, one has a penis thing" "Maka stop yelling at me! Yell at Kira!" "What the hell did I do?" "I don't know, there's always something though" 'Patricia Thompson!' "WHAT?! YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! MY LITTLE SISTER RANKS HIGHER THAN ME!" "Oh what an honor it is! #6, at least it divides evenly!" "Hyahahahahaha" "Yay Patty!" Kira waved gestured to Patty for everyone to see "I can get good pictures of this one!" She whispered. "She's kinda... Recklessly cute. Isn't she?" "Yeah, I gotta thing for blondes" "Especially ones with big boobs" "Hahahaha you know it!" "I don't know, I like the short hair thing" "Clay?!" "What?! I just said I like short hair not that I have a crush on the chick!" "Mhmm" "It's true!" "MY LITTLE SISTER!" Liz cried while hugging Patty "she's 6 on the list! I'm so proud, I'm such a proud big sister. But at the same time. My little sister ranked higher than me and... THAT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH" "Now now Liz, just be proud of your little-WAH!" *Here lies Death the Kid, who tried to calm one of the Thomson sisters* "Nooooo! Kid!" Kira cried, holding him. "Ki...ra... I... always... loved you" he croaked. "The 3 of you are ridiculously dramatic" Maka informed them. "Not ridiculously so" Kid stood up. *Facepalms all around* Maka pressed her fingers to her temples and sighed. "Hee hee hahahahahahaha hyahaha" 'Number 5!' "I don't remember everyone being so crazy back when we were in school" Spirit muttered, looking around at all of the students. "Yeah, well it has been a while since me and you were at school" Stein told him "though I suspect that an added factor are the star clan brats and the Shinigami babe" "But in all seriousness Liz aren't you overreacting?" "No!" "But most people don't even get on the list!" "Yeah but most people aren't as hot as me" 'Marie Mjölnir!' Spirit's jaw dropped and Stein's cigarette fell out of his mouth in his surprise. They both turned to look at her, she was blushing and covering her mouth with her hand. "Oh! Well..." "Boobs" "Boobs" "Boobs" *nods nods nods* "What was that?" Marie asked, her eyebrow twitching "talking about..." She rolled up her sleeves "my breasts?" *hammer smacks all around* "Oooowwwwww!..." "Blonde hair + boobs" *nod nod* "Dangerous looking" *nod* "Hella, fiery personality" *crrrrrrrrkkkkkkkk* "Oh no" "Oh yes!" "Someone other than us is getting beaten!" "OOOOWWWWWW!" *pain, pain, pain* "Well, Marie-Sensei is very pretty, she has blonde hair and her eye patch makes her look somewhat wild" Maka nodded "she is intelligent, kind and has that motherly-vibe." "So are you saying that the person that made the list has Mommy-issues?" "Possible" 'Now then, we are going to begin the announcement of the top 3. Remember, these are chosen in more than just their physical appearance' "I wonder who's gonna be in the top 3?" "Me too" "It's so mysterious, who is worthy enough to covet beauty, intelligence, and a killer personality?" "Well obviously my sweet princess Kim is going to be in it!" Ox said, throwing his arms around said girl. "Ugh no way, things like that are a waste of time and are so stupid in the first place. Who cares about how pretty someone is? Ugh. It's disgusting" Kim grimaced "and step. Away." "Real killer personality on that one" 'Coming in at number 3...' "Well I think Tsubaki is gonna be in it for sure!" Kira grinned "probably 1st place too!" "Thank you Kira-San" Tsubaki smiled. "Of course Tsubaki is going to be first! Do you think that anyone but my star is worthy of being 1st?!" Black Star declared. "What about 'your moon'?" Kilik teased, referring to Kira. "Pfft, as if" Kira laughed. "Yeah! There's no way Kira'd get on that list" Black Star waves it off. "You're so kind..." Kira glared then turned her fingertips into blades "...KIIIIRRRAAAAAA" "No!" "SLICE!" She dragged her knives across his back. "OOWWWW" 'Kim Diehl!' "Yes! My beautiful goddess of course she made it!" "This is stupid" "A bitch but a hottie" "True Dat" "I dunno... Sometimes she can be pretty cool" "But is she really all that smart?" "Never seen it" "Playful schoolgirl" "Dangerously playful schoolgirl" "Hahahahahahahahaha" Kira burst out laughing "Kim *wheeze* who doesn't even *giggle* want it *laugh* got 3rd, while Liz who desperately wants it, got 10th. Hah!" "KIRA YOU ARE ABOUT TO DIE" "Uhh no please don't kill her, I kinda like her" "Don't destroy half the star clan Liz!" *giggle* "Kim you're totally cute!" "Yeah! See, now more boys will notice you other than that creep Ox" "He's not really a creep... Plus, shouldn't I already have been noticed by guys if I made it onto the list? The whole system is stupid" 'Coming in at number 2!' "Wonder who it'll be?" "I thought you were betting on it being Tsubaki?" "No, Tsubaki's gonna be number 1. I wonder who number 2 is though" "So confident in Tsubaki?" "Of course! And then I can really make a profit, do you know what she wears to bed? Spoiler alert, it ain't clothes" 'Tsubaki Nakatsukasa!' "EHHH?" "HOLD UP! If Tsubaki got second what bitch gets 1st? Cause I'm about to throw down up in here!" "Kira calm down!" "Don't tell my little sister to calm down! Who got 1st place that my star was knocked down to 2nd?! I demand a recount!" "Well, I'm older. But I agree!" "There are no recounts, there were no votings" "Yes Black Star, Kira, there were no votings so will you please calm down? 2nd place is extraordinarily well, winning 1st isn't everything" "Did she seriously just say that to two members of the star clan?" -Soul "Aw Tsubaki, and you know them the best." -Maka "I fear for the safety of whoever gets 1st place" -Kid "Do you think we're allowed to comment on why she's so hot?" "I'm afraid ill be killed by Black Star" "But he DID say that she deserved 1st, so he must know how hot she is" *nod nod* "She's got the whole exotic look going on" "Yeah, and those tits on an Asian chick? Crazy" "She's really nice too" "Sometimes I ask her for help on homework just so that I can feel her boobs rubbing against my arm" "Well then remind me to screen the next person that asks for help from her" "Oh no" "Ohhhh yes" Black Star looked at them, his glare so strong his pupils had turned to stars. "AHHHHHHHH!" 'The long awaited moment...' "Ehh not that long" 'The highly coveted,' "Ehh not really" ' most beautiful,' "Relatively" 'most intelligent,' "show me proof" 'kindest girl in the entire school... Coming in at first place...' "Some skank" "Ooh! Who could it be who could it be?" "Who's nicer than Nakatsukasa-San?" "Who's prettier than her?" "This person has to be smarter than Albarn-San too right?" "Well not necessarily since Maka's not on the list" "What if SHE is first?" "Hah!" "MAAAAKKKKKAAAAAA... CHOP!" "Maka YOU are taking this way too seriously!" "Eek I can't wait!" "Who could it be who could it be?" 'Kira Tsuki!' *silence all around* (a/N: there will be 2 or 3 more chapters)