Breaking Destiny's Plan
Chapter 2: Not everything goes in the microwave
Irish: HAPPY(belated) BIRTHDAY KANDA!
Kanda: Shut up! Your too loud!
Irish: YULLEN WEEK KICKED ASS!!
Irish: Do I really have to do the disclamer thing? I think you guys already know I'm not Hoshino-sensei
Irish: Oh, Spoilers up to.....186
Third Person's POV
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Mia was very excited today, and do you know why? No it wasn't because the war with the Millennium Earl was over or that someone invented a pepper that didn't give you gas(None of those things have happened yet). No, it was because it was Kanda's birthday...not really. His birthday passed a few days ago but this was the day when Kanda comes back from his mission and he could (or be forced to) celebrate his birthday.
"Its almost done"
Mia said happily
She was busy cooking Kanda's present. She had no idea what to buy him for a present so she decided to make him something instead and you know what they say the best way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Even if that said stomach eats the same meal everyday.
"O.k its done"
Mia said beaming with pride.
She had just put the finishing touches on her creation. At first she wanted to bake Kanda a cake but since he hates sweet things she decided to make him a cake made of rice.
She had been poorly spying on Jerry watching him cook, so she could learn how to cook. Cooking was easier said than done. Mia learned many lessons about cooking that week and a half.
1. Just because the water has a few bubbles doesn't mean its boiling. She finally understood the statement "a watched pot never boils".
2. Knifes are very sharp
3. Not everything goes in the microwave
Such as hotdogs, tin-foil and cats. Things like that tend to you know EXPLODE! Luckly Mia was able to get the hell out of there when something went KA-BOOM! Finally after many hours of effort and making tons and tons of blacken crap Mia had finally was able to create something eatable.
"JERRRYYY-SSSAANN!"
A very happy and hungry Moyashi called out
God damn it! Allen its 5:30 in the morning! Why are you awake at this hour?
Mia thought to herself
but more importantly why was she awake at this hour? It was time to bust out those ninja hiding skills she learned from Lavi.
"Mia-san what are doing?"
F$%K!
" what are you doing here?"
"I asked first"
"LIES!"
Glancing over Allen glanced at the rice-cake and the look on his face could only say one thing 'I'm gonna eat that'. He was going to be happy moyashi after eating but he realized what day it was and made an angry-yet oh so adorable face.
" Who is THAT for?"
He asked trying to be polite through all his anger.
Allen liked Mia(as a friend) she was a nice girl. Allen did not like Kanda and how Any woman could find love Kanda enough to make him food that wasn't laced with poison was a complete mystery to him.
"Kanda-kun of course"
Kanda didn't like it when Mia called in 'Yuu-sama' in public which didn't make much sense to her for he didn't mind her calling him that in private. Mia thought it must be a "man thing"
"Why?"
"Cause it he was away on his birthday so I want to celebrate it with him when I get back"
"No, I mean WHY do you care about him? It makes no sense, he makes people want to punch a dolphin in the blowhole!"
He yelled
"Just because he make you want to punch a poor sweet innocent dolphin doesn't mean he makes everyone else wants to punch a poor sweet innocent dolphin"
Mia said
This was the last straw for Allen, he could never understand women! They always go after the jerks(cough) CROSS(cough). This was just like the time he told Lenalee all of the terrible hardships Cross made him go through.
And what did the women around him do? Not sympathies or say what poor excuse for a master Cross was but swoon over him. Saying he did tough love or some bull shit like that!
Gawd, I'll never get girls
Allen seeing her busily running about trying to make herself look pretty, he felt a twang in his heart. The only relationship he's seen if the one-night-stands his master has on a daily basis so it was interesting to see one that wouldn't end in 30 minutes.
Kanda is in a meaner mood than usual, it isn't fair that all Mia's hard work will go to waste. I wonder if I should tell her? Why the hell am I even asking?She's my friend so I should tell her
Allen thought to himself
"Hey Mia-san"
"How many times do I have to tell you; NO -SAN! Its either -chan or nothing at all! Do you want to be beaten with this frying pan?"
"No but um uh...."
"Spit it out already-Yuu-sama!"
Mia's eyes lite up as she saw her favorite samurai walk in. The only thing she didn't see was how pissed he was. If you look into his eyes no one would be surprised if your face started to melt. Allen with his very developed survival skills decide to high-tail it out of there. Laving a moyashi shaped puff of smoke in his wake. He knew things were going to get ugly very quickly but not before taking alittle snack.
"YUU-SAMA WELCOME BACK, I MISSED YOU!"
Mia yelled happily jumping over the counter to give him a hug. And thought= he was giveing her death glares she still buried her face in his chest.
"G-get the hell off me!"
"How was your misson?"
"......"
Great, he's ignoring me.
"So what happened?"
"Nothing"
"Nothing huh? Nothing seems alot like something"
"Well, what do you know?"
"I know lots of things, like multiplication, division, history, writing"
That's not what I meant you stupid girl, this is all the Rabbit's fault and his present
Kanda thought to himself as Mia went on about all the stuff she knew.
"I know how to cook-oh I almost forgot I have a present for you!"
Mia said jumping over the counter to go get the cake.
"Do you like me?"
Kanda suddenly asked in a voice dripping with bitterness.
" I love you, I say it all the time"
"but do you mean that?"
"What are you getting at?"
Mia gave up on searching for the vanished cake and had decide to get herself some breakfeast.
Kanda was angry and depressed, the closer he got to Mia the harder it was to deal with the fact that he wasn't human and she was; it was beating him on the head with a mallet.
Your not human
THACK!
She is human
THACK!
And humans can only love humans
THACK!
THACK !
THACK!
"Would you still love me even if I said that I wasn't human?"
"Do you bleed red blood?"
"Yes"
"Does your heart beat?"
"yes"
"Do you breathe air?"
"Yes"
"Sorry, tell you this but your human"
THACK!
Her words were comforting but if she knew the truth, she would be singing a very different tune.
EWW! GO AWAY YOU FREAK! I CAN'T BELIEVE I ALMOSTFELL IN LOVE WITH A DISCARDED LAB RAT!
THACK!
THACK!
THACK!
Kanda's rudeness overridden his adorable shyness and yelled out a good hint to Mia about what was wrong with him
"That's not what I meant you moron!"
"Well, if you put it that way there is no true definition on whether or not you are you human. In that sense (munch) being human is only a list of rules or regulations that people must follow. It is only when one breaks those rules that they become inhuman but they(munch) have not changed species(munch).
Mia said in between bits of cereal
"Do you feel better?"
"no"
Mia now finished with her cereal plopped herself on the counter giving herself momentum to jump up on his back. She used to do this all the time to her older brothers.
" I don't care if your human or not I still love you and that's not going to change. So stop worrying about dumb things"
"says the girl who won't sleep with the window open cause she thinks a cereal killer will come up and kill her"
"SHUT UP! IT COULD TOTALLY HAPPEN!"
Kanda just rolled his eyes, his little bird worried about the dumbest things. And telling her how dumb they are only made her mad. Too bad she looks so damn cute when she's mad.
I hate sweet things but I lov-really like you
"Yuu-sama?"
"Hn?"
"Can I kiss you?"
Kanda's mouth dropped open, did Mia just ask to kiss him? It seemed too good to be true. His cheeks felt hot before he could do anything Mia grabbed his chin pulling his face towards hers.
Chu
It was rare for them to show affection, both were very shy(he is admit it) and the fact that they could never spend time together definitely put a damper on their relationship. But this made every moment special.
This would have been a beautiful moment if you take out the fact that Mia made Kanda give her a piggy-ride, yes, a beautiful moment until..
"Yuu-chan!"
C^%KBLOCKED!
"Go away"
"Awww is Yuu-chan still upset"
"Yes I am now go away before I chop you to bits"
Kanda sounded alot less threat hing with a girl on his back.
"What did you do Lavi?"
"Mia-kun your so mean, you've been spending so much time with Yuu-chan your starting act like him"
"just answer the question"
"Fine, Yuu-chan didn't like present I gave him"
"What did you get him?"
"Strippers"
Kanda butted in
"ST-STRIPPERS! YOU GOT HIM F%^KING STRIPPERS!"
Mia roared to the heavens. How could that moron buy a guy some strippers when he has a girlfriend. Now that she thought about it really wasn't a big deal. Its not like he was going to sleep with them anyway.
"THEY WEREN'T STRIPPERS,they were hookers"
Hookers
Hookers
Hookers
Hookers
Hookers
HOOKERS
Mia snapped
Jumping off Kanda the vicious yet tiny wolf attacked the hyper-active-hooker-buying rabbit. Compared to liss a Panda-attack seemed like a gentle tap. The knees to the crotch was a real kicker(no pun intended)
"Having fun rabbit?"
Kanda said sarcastically.
Kanda was enjoying this, it was a 2-for-one deal of enjoyment. Having the oh-so-annoying rabbit getting the living shit beat out of him and the fact that Mia was doing was a major turn-on.
This beautiful beating was sadly cut short for it was now officially morning and the riser awoke to get some grub.
"Shit! Witnesses!"
Mia cried as she jumped off the Lavi's beaten corpse.
Glancing around Mia noticed her birthday boy had fled the scheme and went to go look for him. Lucky for her he didn't go far. Wanted to call out to him, her better judgement stopped her.
Yuu-sama is probably very tired, and clinging on to him would only annoy him. Its best to let him sleep.
Did I make you happy today Yuu?
She would never know unless she asked him. That would wait until hell was frozen out. Making a loud and dramatic yawn Mia went to go back to her room and get some rest.
"Attention all exorcist meet in supervisor Komui's officer immediately, that is all"
Or maybe not
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Irish: Mia was really voilent today
Mia: hey Allen
Allen: Yeah?
Mia: Where's my cake?
Allen: IDK
Mia: Oh really, cause when you left so did the cake. Why do you think that is?
Allen: IDK
Mia: I THINK YOU DO KNOW AND I THINK YOU KNOW WHERE THE CAKE IS
Allen: THE CAKE IS A LIE!
Mia: no it isn't its in your gut!
Irish: Thats all we have time for today, see you next chapter!