I'm home and Damon and Matt are already here, I wonder if Caroline is here too. I open the door and yell out Damon's name.

-"Hey beautiful, Matt and Caroline are here, what's this all about?"

-"I'll tell you once they come downstairs but before they do, can I have a kiss?."

Damon flashes a smile, holds my waist and kisses me. This kiss would have been perfect if I could get Stefan out of my head. I had the feeling Damon knew something was up.

-"Hey Elena, I can sense something is wrong. Did I bite your lip or something?"

-"No it's not that, it's Stefan."

-"What..."

Before he could finish his sentence, Matt and Caroline come walking down stairs with Caroline saying, "What's with the face, Damon?"

"It's nothing. Now what's the problem? Matt says it might have to do something with college."

I can tell Damon is frustrated that I would think of Stefan during our kiss, but why would he get so frustrated when he knows I still care about him and that I'm in love with him, only him.

Caroline breaks the silence and says,"As much as I would love to talk about college and how Tyler is back-"

I blurt out, "Oh my God, when did Tyler get back, I thought he couldn't return to Mystic Falls because of Klaus."

Caroline replies with sass, "Well since you haven't answered my calls, I haven't gotten to tell you about many things. Your my best friend, you should be there for me and for Bonnie, who's not even human anymore."

I can sense Damon and Matt feeling awkward behind us. Matt is probably thinking about his European trip with Rebekah this summer.

"I'm sorry, we can go to the Grill after this with Bonnie", I reply. She nods and says,"Elena and I brought you guys here to ask you a few questions about Stefan."

"I knew it!", Damon shouted. "Well do you have anything on where Stefan could be, he's been gone since graduation.", Caroline replies angrily.

-"He said that after he finally gave Elena the cure, he would leave Mystic Falls and have a life of his own, I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have left if Elena didn't chose me ."

-"Well do you know where he's headed, I can't let him go without saying goodbye.", Caroline says softly.

Matt replies,"Me neither."

-"He didn't say where he was headed. He just said he was happy for me and left with Lexi in the SUV.", Damon says.

All I could think about now is why didn't Damon mention this to me especially since I've been around him this whole time. I also wish I could've said goodbye.

-"Do you know anywhere he would've liked to go?", I ask?

-"He mentioned to me once he wanted to go to Portland since he never been there before.", Matt responded.

-"Great! We can all go looking for him tomorrow, I think I know the way Stefan might've went to reach Portland.", Caroline said.

Everyone agrees and we plan to go searching tomorrow at noon. Before Matt left, Caroline and I left to go to the Grill to meet up with Bonnie. It's been a while since us three have had a nice conversation without supernatural talk. We reach the Grill and find Bonnie waiting for us in the table next to the fire.

-"Hey Bonnie! It's been a while since I've seen you. I'm sorry I couldn't come sooner, I'm having some issues with Stefan and Damon.", I said.

-"It's fine. Anyway, what's wrong with you, Stefan and Damon, I thought you finally made your choice."

-"I did. I love Damon but hearing how Stefan left without a goodbye kills me inside and unfortunately Damon can sense it with just a kiss."

-"You really miss him, do you."

-"I do, since we have a whole lot of history together but I made my choice to be with Damon. He's the man I'm in love with. I just love Stefan as a friend like I do with you guys. "

-"I always thought once the sire bond was broken, you would turn back to the girl who loved Stefan uncontrollably."

-"I did too but the sire bond taught me a lot about Damon and once it was broken I was still in love with him."

-"I can see that."

-"Tomorrow we're gonna search for Stefan, it would be great if you could join us."

-"I'd love to help besides have you heard Tyler is back!"

-"I did! How did this all happen?"

-"It was Klaus' graduation present to me since he knew it might've not accepted his first class ticket to New Orleans with him.", Caroline said with a smile.

-"Oh my God, he's so in love with you. Did he say anything else?!"

-"He told me that Tyler is my first love but he intends for him to be my last however long it takes. After getting to know him, I realize how a gentleman Klaus has become, he seems like Stefan nowadays."

-"You totally want me to ditch Damon and live happily ever after with Stefan."

-"Am I that obvious?"

-"Yes and it's not going to happen. I made my choice and you know it."

-"Fine, so Bonnie how's your hot relationship with Jeremy."

-"Don't forget he's my brother, Caroline."

-"No comment.", Bonnie says cracking a smile.

After Caroline finally convinced Bonnie to spill and me explaining about how I used the cure on Katherine, I head home. I reach home and change into some white lace trimmed boy shorts and a red tank top. I get in bed finding Damon reading a book. I decide to to break the silence.

-"If you put that book down we can have some fun."

Before I know it, Damon throws the book on the floor and begins to kiss me. Every kiss we share makes me want more. He starts leading his kisses to my neck but before I can let him continue I ask him, "Why didn't you tell me Stefan was leaving. Since you knew I still cared about him, you wouldn't have left him leave without saying goodbye to me and my friends."

I knew I asked this question at a wrong time but I couldn't help but ask. Damon lefts his head and answers,"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. I just thought if he said goodbye for good to you, you would have a change of heart and ditch me for him. I will admit that I didn't tell you because I was scared you would let me go and maybe I got jealous of how perfect and happy your past relationships had been with him. Again, I'm sorry."

I seriously have no words. How could Damon not still trust me with saying goodbye to someone I dearly loved and who was leaving for good after I confessed my love to him instead of Stefan. I don't know if I should just tell Damon it's ok and it was just him being protective or to just argue with him about how we need to trust each other or we won't work out. I can see Damon just wondering what I'm gonna say. I know what i need to say.

-"I just need some time to think this over for a bit, will you excuse me. I'll be back soon."

-"Sure."

I grab my diary underneath the bed and head to Stefan's room to be alone. I lock the door, grab a pen, and get in his bed ready to write.

Dear Diary,

I just figured out Damon didn't trust me with saying goodbye to Stefan who apparently is gone for good after confessing my love to him instead of Stefan. I chose Damon. I, worried our relationship won't work without trust. What should I do? Maybe I should talk to Damon tomorrow to work things out. I don't want our relationship to end, after all, I'm still in love with him after what he did. So what, every couple has problems. Our situations are what makes your relationship with someone even stronger. I sure learned this with Matt and Stefan. Being in Stefan's room bring back such good and funny memories. I can just remember it like it was yesterday when Stefan and I celebrated my first feed with the delicious champagne. I do miss him like crazy but I think Stefan and I would be better as friends. A friend might wake up tomorrow early to look for a lost friend. Who knows. Elena Gilbert has a busy schedule for tomorrow. I think I'm going to sleep here tonight to get away from the awkwardness with Damon tonight. Tomorrow him and I will talk it over and pretend nothing ever happened. Good Night. Xx

Forever & Always,

Elena