Cover art by CatrinaSL; special thanks to Bragi151 for his excellent beta work.
Disclaimer: We do not own Fruits Basket. But we have been the third wheel once or twice during what otherwise would have been a romantic date.
Maybe it was Shigure's fault. He was the one who manipulated Tohru into delivering a package to Hatori. It was only natural for her to stay for a bit after her errand was done, only the "just for a moment" turned into a long afternoon of chatting. It was dark out before a grumbling noise alerted them to the hour and the fact that they had both missed a meal. She blushed and stammered apologies, but he simply shook his head and asked her out to dinner.
They were on their way out of the Sohma compound when they ran into Momiji. The rabbit lost no time in asking where they were going, and when he was informed, promptly invited himself along.
Hatori was planning on stepping into a quiet family restaurant or just buying them something from a ramen cart, but it appeared that Momiji had other plans.
"Let's go here!" he said excitedly, pointing and tugging on Tohru's hand. "This place is good!"
"O-okay, Momiji-kun," Tohru said, ever ready to go along with him.
"This place is kind of..." Hatori began, eyeing the facade of what appeared to be an expensive and romantic restaurant.
"Don't you like it?" Momiji cried, in his best 'pouty child' voice. "Tohru likes it! Tohru wants to go!"
"That is... um, if that's all right with you, Hatori-san," she said politely. He couldn't stand for long against their united front. Momiji's cuteness, which was deliberate but effective, and Tohru's innocent hope, which was more persuasive for its being unintentionally so, would have been enough to convince anyone.
He swung the door open. The room was filled with couples. Hatori sighed. Momiji was up to something, and that was never a good sign. Not if one wanted a quiet, uneventful evening. Hatori happened to enjoy quiet, uneventful evenings, and he was starting to think that asking Honda Tohru to dinner had been a bad idea.
"Let's sit over there!" Momiji pointed at a rather dark and romantic-looking corner, where a table for two sat waiting for the next lucky pair.
"Welcome," said an employee, "Table for... three?"
"Yes, please!" Momiji chirped.
"What a nice family," the employee said, smiling at Momiji, and then in a lower voice to Hatori, said, "Sir, this really isn't a family restaurant, you know."
"I'll be good!" Momiji promised, tugging on the employee's sleeve. "They hardly ever get to go out!" he whispered loudly. Hatori and Tohru glanced at one another, simultaneously blushing when their eyes met.
"Well, um," the employee began, obviously falling victim to Momiji's adorable charms. "I suppose we could make an exception this once. I'll get another chair and place setting." Momiji released him and he stood upright, giving Hatori a look. "But next time, please arrange for a babysitter beforehand."
"But, we're not-!" Tohru began to explain, but the employee had already turned away to fulfill his duties. They waited in silence while the necessary arrangements were made to the table Momiji had indicated. Hatori occasionally cleared his throat as if he was going to say something, but he never spoke. Tohru looked from Momiji to the table, from the table to Hatori, and blushed all the while. Momiji just grinned, as if happily unaware of his maneuvers.
The light and easy mood of the afternoon had all but disappeared, and the group would have sat in silence were it not for Momiji's chattering. He spoke quietly, at least, showing some respect for their surroundings, but overall, it was awkward.
Luckily for everyone, that changed about halfway through the meal. Momiji slipped away, explaining that he had to use the restroom. Tohru and Hatori avoided looking at one another for the first minute or so. When they finally did make eye contact, they couldn't help it.
They burst out laughing.
"What..." Hatori gasped out between laughs, "What was Momiji-kun thinking?"
"I don't know!" she said, wiping at the tears of mirth streaming down her face. "I can't believe they think we're his parents!"
"'This isn't a family restaurant, you know,'" Hatori said, imitating the man who had seated them.
Tohru giggled. "Well, next time we'll just have to find a sitter."
He gave a crooked grin. "Yes. We will."
She blushed. She'd just been repeating what the man had said, but...
Momiji chose that moment to return triumphantly (and quietly). He smiled at both of them as though he knew what they'd been discussing and approved.
Their server, on the other hand, was giving them looks that spoke plainly of his disapproval. Hatori smirked and pointed him out to Tohru. "I think we've upset the mood of the restaurant. Shall we get the rest of this boxed?" She giggled and nodded; the man looked wary when he was waved over, and relieved when he found out why they'd done so.
They left quickly, still amused about the whole adventure. They walked back to the Sohma compound, where Hatori had left his car. He drove them both to Shigure's house (Momiji insisted on accompanying them) and walked her to the door.
"Well, thank you for dinner, gentlemen," she said, still laughing a little.
Hatori smiled. "Until next time," he said, causing her to blush.
"Next time," she agreed, then rushed inside.
"This is the last time I'm going to help you, Ha'ri," Momiji lectured as they walked back to the car. He sounded surprisingly serious. "As far as I'm concerned, Tohru-chan's heart is still fair game."
Hatori was a bit surprised to have this sort of remark aimed at him by someone more than ten years his junior. But he smiled, glanced back at the house, and said, "May the best man win."
Authors' Note 10.19.13: Thanks for reading!
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