"Am I a bad person Santana?" Kurt asked as the pair laid down together on Santana's bed. Kurt and Santana, or Kurtana as they were known by the school, had been best friends since meeting in third grade. Santana helped Kurt when he had been pushed into the mud by some stupid boy who thought that Kurt's bag was 'girly' and she taught him the trick of kicking a boy in the 'gonads' when they were mean. They soon had become an indestructible pairing and when they were together they were feared by the masses at McKinley High for there sheer fabulousness and the utter terror they bought. Kurt had become annoyed at himself for becoming Noah's plaything, he never wanted to belong to somebody, especially when he knew that for that person that's all it was. Noah could never love Kurt. Sure, Noah was in lust with Kurt, of course he was. Kurt could make Noah cum harder than anyone ever could, but Noah would always, always end up with a woman. That's the just the way it went. Kurt stood no chance. Unless he grew a vagina, and no, he doesn't quite fancy having one of them thank you very much. Santana was his best friend and if there was one thing you could count on from Santana was brutal honesty.
"No, you're not a bad person Kurt" Santana stated as they stared at the poster of Jennifer Lopez of Santana's wall. She may not be out of the closet yet, but she couldn't deny the honor of having Jennifer Lopez on her wall. Plus, you know, it kind of helps get her in the mood when she has some D.I.Y to attend to. "You have questionable taste in men and friends, I mean how you can even bear to be in the same room as Rachel Berry for more than 3 seconds without wanting to set yourself on fire God only knows, but your one of the most decent and honest people I know". Santana spoke. "Why'd you ask?"
Kurt sighed. "I'm kind of a bastard to Sebastian, aren't I?"
"He gives as good as he gets" Santana replied "And remember he started the fued when he labelled you gayface in senior year".
"Oh God yeah" Kurt laughed "He soon shut the hell up once my foot connected with his nuts though, he didn't see that one coming!"
Santana didn't say anything for a while. But she turned around to look at Kurt and said "You know you're gonna fuck him eventually don't you?"
Kurt groaned. "Don't be so vulgar"
Santana shrugged. "Hey Snow White I'm just telling you like it is. The sexual chemistry is there. You two are seriously gonna get hot and heavy one of these days and it's going to be sensational". She paused for a moment, a slight grin forming on her pretty face. "Can I be there? Please. I won't make a noise I swear down. Or could you at least record it?"
Kurt picked up a pillow and slapped her with it. But then he got serious. "I'm going to end it with Noah tonight I think" he said and Santana looked surprised.
"Really?" Santana asked as she took the pillow Kurt had thrown at her and put it on her stomach "I think that might be for the best".
Kurt sighed. "I like him Santana, but I'm getting kind of fed up of being used merely for my quite fabulous body and my ass that won't quit. And I'm sure he'll find some cheerios soldier to cry on. Or fuck. Or something".
"That sounds like Noah to me" Santana laughed and Kurt grinned. "Not shut up and help me with my Chemistry homework. Brittany is coming round later and I gots to get my dyke on. Plus you go on too much, you have a pretty mouth but you don't shut up".
"Pot calling the kettle black" Kurt laughed as he stood up and walked over to Santana's desk. "Bloody cheek".
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"Oh fuck yes" Kurt groaned as Noah took his dick whole in his mouth. This wasn't going as planned. Kurt had come here to tell Noah that he didn't want to have sex with him anymore and he wanted to just remain friends. But Noah answered the door wearing nothing but his Calvin boxers and all coherent thoughts were erased from Kurt's mind, especially when Noah pushed him against the wall and throughly tongue fucked his mouth. "Don't stop. Never stop" he moaned as the boxer clad stud continued to take Kurt's rather impressive sized dick down his throat.
Noah seized the sucking on Kurt's dick for a moment to look up at Kurt. "Fuck my mouth Princess". Kurt did as told, thrusting his dick straight down the open and willing mouth of his former bully Noah 'Puck' Puckerman.
"Fuck, who knew you'd be so good at sucking dick" Kurt stammered as he felt himself growing closer to eruption. Kurt thrust into his mouth again, and this time Noah choked slightly as Kurt's dick hit the back of his throat. "For a nethanderthal, you sure know how to blow me".
"I like what I like" Noah stated as Kurt thrust into his mouth again "And I like making you feel good". He paused for a moment then looked up at Kurt "But don't cum in my mouth. I have a date with Leanne and I don't think she'd appreciate the taste of you when I kiss her".
Kurt was angry. So he slammed his dick so hard down Noah's throat that he choked hard. And then again. And then again. He felt himself growing closer to the edge but this made him even more angry. How could someone so pathetic and slimy be so great at making one feel so good? It was a crime, that's what it was.
So he got revenge. He pulled out of Noah's mouth and Noah looked at him like he didn't know what was coming. Kurt grinned down at Noah as he felt himself about to erupt. "I hope when you fuck Leanne you just see my face, you bastard" he groaned before his dick exploded and his seed landed straight onto the face of a very unexpected Puck.
"Fuck, you bastard" Noah moaned as he stood up and grabbed a towel from the shelf. "Why the fuck did you do that?"
Kurt shrugged. "Because I wanted to Puck".
Puck was taken aback for a moment. "That's the first time you've called me Puck in months, why do I get the feeling something bad's about go down?"
"Because it is" Kurt stated but he sighed as he placed his deflating cock into his jeans. "Look, we've had a good run and it's been great, but all good things have to come to an end and I don't think we should do this".
Puck took his boxers off and shrugged. "Fine"
Now Kurt was the one that was taken aback. "Fine. Fine? Is that all you have to say".
"Yeah it's all I gotta say Princess" Noah said and he grinned. He actually fucking grinned. "Because we all know that your going to be straight back into my bed the next time you get even the slightest twinge in your cock. Let's face it, your addicted"
"I'm not addicted you bastard!" Kurt denied abit to loudly that it shocked even him.
"Denial is not just a river in Egypt" Noah replied "Now can you leave, I need a shower before I go meet Leanne".
"You a bastard and I hope you die alone" Kurt replied to Noah as the footballer abanded him in his bedroom to go into the bathroom "And just so you know, you're not the best fuck I've ever had and I was just using you out of boredom".
Noah's laugh rang out all over the house. "Now your just lying to yourself Princess".
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Kurt avoided Noah for the rest of the next day at school. When he saw Noah approaching with Finn Hudson, he literally dived into the girl's toilets. And when he realised he had English with Puck, he bunked his first lesson ever and spent it hating himself in the bathroom of the gent's.
"You're in the wrong toilets Princess Peach" an annoying voice stated as Kurt washed his hands at the sink. Smyth. Fuck. That was the last thing that Kurt wanted at this moment.
"And your hair looks shit today" Kurt bit back but it fell flat and Sebastian looked at him with a mixture of pity and amusement.
"So harsh Ladyface" Sebastian said as he continued to look at Kurt "Is that seriously the best you got?"
"I'm not in the mood" Kurt stated as he walked to the washer and put his hands in it. He loathed Smythe, he really did. But crap, he looked good today and that was not something that Kurt would ever admit out loud to anyone. Ever. "I really don't need you and your obnoxious personality around me".
Sebastian shrugged as he leant against the wall. "What's wrong Cinderfella, have you broken a nail or something? Oh I know, your on your period, ain't ya" he spoke and Kurt's patience was wearing thin.
"I've had just about enough of you and your Meerkat face. Go away your making me feel sick" Kurt lied "Plus I've got a hot date tonight".
"Don't lie to a first class liar because one always knows when someone is lying" Sebastian replied "And the only date you've got tonight is with your right hand".
"I'm left handed you imbecile" Kurt replied "And why would I lie? Have you seen me? Have you seen my behind?" And so that Sebastian got the point, Kurt turned around so Sebastian could get a better view at The Arse.
The Arse. That's what everyone called it. The Arse. Because it was perfect. And Santana wasn't lying when she said that The Arse had its own appreciation thread on the school website. The fact that Sebastian started such thread in a moment of weakness was something that never needed to be revealed.
"Why would I need to lie? All the guys in this school want to get all up in this".
Sebastian sighed because that was true. Sebastian didn't want Kurt to see how much this affected him because his feelings for Kurt were something he knew he would never be able to show. Because Sebastian was a handsome guy but Kurt was just.. in a different league. He had no chance with Kurt. "Who is it then? This date. If it's so true then you won't mind spilling the beans would ya?"
"I'm not telling you anything" Kurt stated as he picked his bag up from the floor and put it on his shoulders "I'm sure your find out tomorrow".
And those words stabbed at Sebastian's heart like a knife. Because he knew it was true. And fuck. That hurt.
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"Don't sit so close to me Rachel, I have a banging headache and the last thing I need is your voice making me want to jump from the McKinley roof" Kurt said as he sat in the canteen next to Santana who was otherwise engaged in a slanging match with Quinn over who was wearing the better dress. Quinn was, but Kurt would never tell Santana that because everyone would be mourning his death the next day.
"I'm sorry Kurt but there's something I need to you" Rachel said quietly so that Santana couldn't hear "I only need a minute of your time. Please"
Kurt sighed and agreed to go with her. Mainly for his own sanity. If he said no then Rachel would go on at him for the rest of the day and he really didn't need The Rachel Berry dramatics thank you very much.
When they reached the hallway, which was empty, Kurt listened as Rachel spoke.
"Please don't say no before I've even asked you" Rachel said but Kurt had heard enough.
"No, No way" Kurt pointed at Rachel "There is no way on this earth that I am joining Glee club, christ"
Rachel sighed. "But you have an amazing voice Kurt and it would be a talent to waste that. You could end up in Broadway you know" she stated. But then backtracked. "Like Off broadway or something".
"No. No" Kurt replied "And again in case you didn't hear it. NO!"
"Fine" Rachel sighed "Your loss. But when Sebastian suggested we ask you, I told him you would never agree".
Kurt paused for a moment, his mouth literally dropping open. "Sebastian is joining Glee club?"
"Yes" Rachel stated, her grin wide. "And Finn Hudson is aswell and he's trying to get Puck involved which I don't think will happen because I heard him telling Finn he'd rather flush his own head down the toilet and eat off Santana's toilet bowl then ever join the Glee club, but it's not impossible that he would say no". she stated "And also, you know Mercedes the big chick with the big attitude, she said yes and Tina Cohen-Chang but you wouldn't know her because she's well, not popular".
"I know her" Kurt stated and for some reason he felt like a knife had been stabbed into his chest. Damn.
"Fine" Kurt stated "But if I do agree to come. For ONE SESSION" he said and then he added "ONE SESSION" again just so Rachel got the message. "YOU ARE NEVER EVER TO TELL SANTANA".
"Fine" Rachel stated "But that will be kind of awkard since Santana has been in the Glee club for nearly a month now".
WHAT. THE. FUCK.
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"I feel like I've been stabbed in the heart" Kurt dramatically said as he sat in the Locker Room with Sam "How could Santana keep something like that from me?"
Sam shrugged and carried on pressing benches. Or whatever it was called. But it looked hot. "Maybe she knew how you'd react".
"She hates the Glee club. She always calls them 'Losers from Loserville who are destined to become King Losers" he sighs "I need to talk with that Latino Bitch and give her what for".
Sam stopped pressing weights and looked at Kurt. "Maybe you should join Glee club" Sam said but then he saw the look on Kurt's face. "Or at least give it at go and see if suck's that bad".
Then a thought came to Kurt. "Samuel Evans".
"Shit, you full named me. Shit, what are you going to do, Kurt Elizabeth Hummel. Why do I suddenly fear for my life?"
"You are going to join Glee club with me!" Kurt replied "It can be another thing ot add to our bromance book".
"Oh Christ" Sam said "And I thought it couldn't get any gayer then the time we fell asleep together".
Kurt grinned. "What time?"
Sam rolled his eyes. "Fine. Fine. But only because that Rachel chick is kinda hot in a dorky kinda way".
"She is not hot. Have you seen what she wears? If I do join Glee club I am taking her shopping" Kurt replied "Or selling her on Ebay". And then Kurt's eyes drew to a shirtless stud talking to Noah's brother Jake. "Who is that and why don't I know him?" Kurt asked Sam.
The blonde turned around and looked at who Kurt was pointing to.
"Ryder Lynn" Sam stated "He just transferred here from California".
"I want him" Kurt said bluntly and Sam rolled his eyes. "Dude, I don't think he swings that way".
Kurt stood up, pulling out a mirror and looking at himself in it. He looked good. He looked more than good. "Does my arse look good in these jeans?" he asked Sam.
Sam grinned. "Your arse always looks good in those jeans". But then when Kurt coughed he changed his tune. "But it's looking exceptionally perfect today Kurt".
"Atta boy" Kurt answered, turning back around and looking at Sam. "You are the perfect guy. Why can't you be gay? Are you sure you haven't got a twin brother hiding somewhere".
"I'm positive".
"Damn"
Kurt turned back around and then walked seductively over to where Ryder and Jake were talking. "Hey Jake" Kurt said and he held out a fist which Jake bumped with no hesitation.
"Kurt" Jake nodded
"And who is this fine young man?" Kurt stated, looking at the new transfer who blushed.
"Ryder" Jake stated "And he's single".
"Really" Kurt asked and he looked at Ryder. "Now that's a shame". And then he did something that if it went wrong could leave him with a broken nose and several broken ribs. He rubbed a finger up Ryder's bare chest. "We're going to have do something about that, aren't we?"
"definitely" Ryder replied staring straight into Kurt's eyes. "You talk sense".
Kurt leaned in and blew into Ryder's ear causing the younger lad to shiver. He leaned in and whispered into Ryder's ear. "Breadsticks. 8pm. Be there. Don't be late". He pulled away and ran his finger down Ryder's chest. He then turned away and walked around to rejoin Sam at the gym area.
But then he turned around and shouted out loud. "And wear a jockstrap!" before walking away again.
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That was a longer chapter then I anticpated but I hope you like it! RYDER AND KURT was a shock and it's something that I kinda like but DON'T WORRY THIS IS KURTBASTIAN END GAME OK.
Next chapter will see Jealous!Sebastian, Horny!Kurt, A Bitch fight between Kurt and Santana which will inevitably end up with ice cream and laughter, a shock Rachel kiss and Kurt audtioning for the Glee club.
ALSO! I'm looking for a BETA because I know there are errors. I have Dyslexia so I'm pretty rubbish at spelling but I've tried to use a dictionary for the most part. Thank you. If you wanna apply please message me.