Perception
"You're doing great, Carter," Jack encouraged quietly from his perch beside her on the bed, giving her hand a supportive squeeze.
For her part, Sam was doing her best not to flinch away from Brightman's probing hands. She was mostly succeeding, although that was not to say that every touch didn't make her skin crawl or start her heart racing.
Upon arriving in the infirmary, Doctor Brightman had instructed Sam to change out of her blood soaked fatigues and into an infirmary gown. However, it had soon become apparent that the blood had stiffened the fabric too much, and her clothing was stuck to too much of her skin to be removed easily. In the end, Sam had been persuaded to leave Jack long enough to shower, stripping off her clothing as the water slowly rinsed the blood out of each item. Standing under the spray of the hot water, Sam had watched in morbid fascination as Teal'c and Daniel's blood had swirled around the bottom of the shower, a never-ending red whirlpool forming around the drain. It was only when Jack had called in to check on her that she had realized how much time she'd spent watching her friends' blood drain away.
"Sir, may I have a word?" Brightman asked, pulling her gloves off and shooting a reassuring smile in Sam's direction.
Squeezing Sam's knee gently, Jack stood and followed the doctor to the far end of the infirmary, out of earshot of the other personnel working there. Glancing over his shoulder every few seconds to make eye contact with Sam, Jack only half-listened to the doctor as she explained her findings.
"… But I would like to sedate her," Brightman concluded, drawing Jack's full attention back to her.
"No," he replied firmly. "That's not open for debate."
"Sir, with all due respect, she is exhausted and, based on her behaviour in the gate room, I think we can both agree that she's not going to fall asleep on her own."
"She hates to be drugged," Jack argued. "And after the last few days she's had, she's going to want to know she can wake up from the nightmares anytime – that can't happen when she's sedated. And believe me doc, there's no dosage of sedatives that will keep her from having nightmares right now."
"She needs rest and, quite frankly, she's not going to get it if she can wake up from her nightmares. Sir, it's in Colonel Carter's best interest," Brightman insisted.
Sighing, Jack conceded that the doctor was right. Pinching the bridge of his nose, Jack cast another glance over his shoulder, finding Sam nervously watching his furtive conversation with Brightman. Holding up one finger in her direction, Jack turned his attention back to the woman standing before him.
"Let me talk to her. When we're ready, I'll let you know, but I don't want to see a single needle before I call you over," Jack bargained, knowing that if Sam thought she was being forced under sedation, her breakdown in the gate room would be just the tip of the iceberg.
Heading back over to the bed, Jack sat down beside Sam and gripped the hand that shot out to grab hold of him. Stroking his thumb soothingly over the back of her knuckles, Jack contemplated the best way to broach the subject with her.
"You're cleared," Jack began slowly. "She wants you to eat a couple of good-sized meals and get plenty of rest though."
Nodding her head to show she'd understood, Sam moved to hop off the bed. All she wanted to do was hole up in her quarters and cry her eyes out, but a firm hand on her shoulder stopped her progress before she'd gotten very far.
"Carter, I don't want you to be alone right now, and deep down, I don't really think you want to be alone either. I want to stay with you, but there are some things I really have to do, you understand that, right?" When he received a nod, Jack continued, "You need rest, but you shouldn't have to deal with nightmares, not yet. Doctor Brightman thinks it would be a good idea to give you something to help you sleep for a few hours, and I think she's right."
"Sir, no, please, I don't want…"
"Even a few hours of sleep will do you a world of good, Carter," Jack reasoned, appealing to her logical side. "You'll be able to rest without nightmares, I'll be able to make the calls I need to make, and I can be back here before you wake up."
"Will you really come back?"
"Absolutely."
Thinking things over for a few moments, Sam decided that his proposal made sense. She hadn't slept since Ba'al had captured her team four days ago, and the possibility of escaping the horrors she'd been subjected to during her imprisonment was enticing. But a big part of her was terrified at the idea of being left alone, even for a few hours.
"Okay," Sam finally agreed, sliding up the bed to lean back against the raised mattress. "I'll let Brightman give me something, but only enough to put me out for a few hours."
"Good girl," Jack murmured, grabbing the blanket that lay across the foot of the bed and spreading it over her. Nodding at Doctor Brightman that it was all right to approach, Jack grasped Sam's hand again, squeezing reassuringly.
"I'm going to give you just enough to put you out for eight hours," the doctor explained, flicking the needle in her hand to remove any air bubbles that might be in it.
"And I'll be back in seven," Jack promised, relieved to see a ghost of a smile cross Sam's face, if only for a moment.
"Someone needs to tell…"
"I'll call Cassie in an hour or two, I don't want to wake her up with this," he interrupted.
"If you wake up sooner and you need something, just let us know Colonel," Brightman instructed, easily sliding the needle into a vein in her patient's arm. Once the syringe was empty, she pulled the curtain around the bed completely closed and left, giving Jack and Sam a few minutes of privacy before Sam drifted off.
Sliding further up the bed, Jack stroked Sam's hair back from her face, watching as the sedative worked its magic and she slowly began to relax.
"I don't want you to worry about it now," Jack said quietly, "but we'll probably have to do a de-briefing sooner rather than later."
"I know," Sam sighed, feeling the tug of sleep pulling at her as the sedative began to take hold. "I'm sorry I haven't told you more,"
"You were in shock, Carter," he reminded. "You did what you could, and the rest we can take care of later. Right now, you just worry about getting some rest."
"Yes, sir," Sam mumbled, her eyes bobbing open and shut several times before they stayed closed.
"I'll be back in a few hours," Jack promised again, although he seriously doubted that she could hear him anymore. Standing, he leaned over and pressed a kiss to her forehead. Then, knowing he had a lot to do and only a few hours to do it all in, he turned and left the infirmary.
Once out in the hallway, he released the tight reign he'd held on his emotions since Sam had informed him that Daniel and Teal'c were dead. Turning abruptly, Jack smashed his fist into the nearest wall as hard as he could. Pulling his hand back, he examined the patches of broken skin and rapidly swelling knuckles with indifference. Hitting the wall hadn't helped anyone, he decided, but the pain in his hand had managed to distract him from the pain in his heart, at least for a moment.
Deciding that phone calls could wait, Jack switched directions and headed for the gym. Right now, he really needed to beat the hell out of something.