11/11/80

Havent entered in this diary due to forgetfulness. Still, some things of note have occurred.

Mitch says the stims will be delayed for another few days. I am beginning to run low. I have 5 left plus the 5 I keep for emergencies.

Ulysses came to the prospecter on the 6th. He came up just to see me. He looks well. His dreads are coming out well again. He told me with some shame in his features that he had to cut it partially but refused to say why.

He spoke of the Divide, that town called Hopeville that I visited god knows how long ago. He looked depressed but also incensed about the subject. I know it was taken by some vicious disaster on the eve of the first slew at the dam. But Ulysses was there. He still hasn't shared how the hell he survived. He must have been some kind of lucky though. I tried to re-assure him, knowing his Legion sympathies, by informing him that the divide stopped the NCR from re-enforcing themselves quickly enough to move past the dam. So while they won the battle, the war was still in play and the legion still had a chance. But he wasn't much calmed by it. Sometimes he speaks well of Caesar, but I think what dominates him now is despair. I forgot to ask if he was acting on Caesars order as a courier right now.

He then started asking me about my sedentary life. He said that goodsprings was doing me little good and that I should move somewhere more peaceful like Arizona. The look I gave him was lost on him. I have no wish to return to the Legions lands. I have no love for the NCR, but I cant deny that their more industrial bent is more useful to a person like myself.

He was unfazed and repeatedly offered to take me wherever I wanted. I asked why he was so eager to leave the Mojave and after some pressure he admitted he was looking for a fellow courier who he had met in Hopeville before it became the Divide. He didn't know where she was but knew she was eventually going to turn up in the Mojave. He kept stressing that I should go somewhere else, East preferably. But I don't plan on it.

He left saying he might see me again, he wasn't sure. He stressed again that I should leave the Mojave as he did. I haven't seen him since. He is such an aged man, but he isn't even out of his twenties. When he meets me now, its as if he needs to unload his mind. I knew him before Hopeville. He was learned, but not quite philosophical. He needed a calling. He gobbled up books on religion looking for a faith but in the end he gave up, saying they were group-based. His tribe had been an identity but thanks to the Legion they no longer existed. He was more pro Legion then but he could easily talk as if he wasnt. I learned things from him. Its probably because of him I read. I could always count on him to buy books so I made sure to scavenge them when I went out into the wastes. Then I started to read a few. From there, as he would say, it was history. He still likes to borrow my books and he took some again this time. One I remember is "A history of English Speaking Peoples" the authors name was blacked out. He wasn't dissuaded when I informed him half the pages were missing.

I enjoy seeing Ulysses, but he worries me more with every visit. I hope that courier can give him the answers he desires and I hope he realises I cant provide them.

Sunny and I went out looking for Geckos and Mantis two nights back. In the end, we found little. One mantis did turn up near the water mains but I found no damage when I checked. We came across a degenerate called Barton. He didn't say his last name, but he looked well wrought. He was hardly armed and didn't seem thankful when I got to him. He probably has a basic camp somewhere nearby. He better not be some opportunist thief. I don't want to have to shoot a person but I wont hesitate if it comes to it.

Geckos are more persistent. The Banana Yucca was damaged last night. The revolver counted this time. I fired all six cylinders into it but it kept coming, its huge eyes obviously able to spot me at that distance, which must have been 15 metres. I fumbled some more bullets in and I fired again. That time it went down. I decided against approaching the Yucca until tomorrow, in case theres more Geckos. I was not at all scared during the encounter, but it was a job getting the fat carcass off my land. Bill came along and helped me move it down a small hill patch. I skinned it as outer vegas correspondents have said that skinning them rots them faster, which Is desirable.

Light keeps failing and flickering. Am going to dig towards the main wire tomorrow If I can. I think I would have heard on radio if there was a massive outage or power issue. Trudy said to not do it if NCR are about. Some obscure law prevents me from doing so.

Little else to say.

Today is the anniversary of "The Great War". Not the one we are still recovering from. A different one that ended all the way back in 1918. I know little of its particulars except that it was a mechanised conflict and that pre-war america took part. It is mentioned in passing in some of these books but i have failed to find one on the subject specifically.

Spoke to a passing trader about finding an old world printer (for books, literature, etc) but he gave me a shrug. It appears that he wasn't aware of them, despite specialising in tech.

Breathing was mostly normal since last entry. I was intensely short of it after the gecko encounter but I have since regained constitution.

Will update this diary when I can.