Dipper's Guide To The Unexplained: Candy Monster

AN: Dipper and Mabel notice a nighttime intruder inside the shack, can they, Steven, and Amethyst stop it from eating their candy?

Note: Takes place after Summerween chapter of UF.

Enjoy!

It was late at night in the Mystery Shack, only Mabel was sound asleep in her and her brother's shared bedroom/attic, after getting into another skirmish with one of the famous supernatural anomalies of Gravity Falls, which was the situation in which they were nearly eaten by the elusive creature who was actually a creature made up of discarded loser candy that just wanted basically everyone people to think he was good, it was experiences like those that rest was greatly needed. Dipper on the other hand was still up doing a segment he called Dipper's Guide To The Explained.

A while after arriving in Gravity Falls, he decided to do a series of videos each focusing on any anomaly the town had, presently he was showcasing the town's oddly shaped food.

"Well that concludes Gravity Falls Anomaly #13: the Möbius chicken strip." he ate one that looked like the infinity symbol. "It's infinitely delicious." Suddenly, a shadowy figure ran right past the camera, it was so fast Dipper couldn't see it, but he did see it take a bag full of candy, that they kept after their first Summerween.

"Yaghhhh! Ya ya!" it screeched.

Dipper jumped at this recent turn of events. "Woah! What the-?!" The creature bumped into the camera, making it fall over, it quickly exited from the attic. Dipper picked it up and went to his slumbering sister. "Mabel, did you see this? Wake up!" he urged her.

"Never." his twin sister responded, she then turned over to the other direction. "Let me sleep forever."

"Some creature jumped out of nowhere! It's eating all our leftover Summerween candy!" he urgently informed her.

Luckily, that was enough to wake her up. "What?!"

"Look!" Dipper turned the camera over to the monster, it finally slowed down so that they could get a better look at it as it ate away at their candy, it was small in stature and round in shape, had tiny hair strands, its eyes were light yellow with red pupils, its skin was tan orange, the tongue was blue, and had short stubby arms and legs.

"Ew." Mabel recoiled in disgust. "It's like some kind of... naked little man."

Seeing that this was another new anomaly, Dipper held up a title card. "Okay, forget the chicken strap, this is now Dipper's Guide To The Unexplained, #76, uh That Thing?"

"I like Candy Monster." Mabel chimed.

Dipper thought for a second and found the name an improvement. "You know what? That's a way better title."

Candy monster crawled around the floor and saw some more candy and consumed it hungrily, then it picked up the Summerween basket and looked at it curiously.

"No. Put it down." Mabel demanded. "Put it down."

Candy Monster ignored her and proceeded to lick the basket.

"Oh, gross!" Mabel cringed in disgust.

"Aaah!" Candy Monster threw the basket and it crashed through the window, hitting Stan.

"Ow!" Stan shouted. "Why am I even outside at this hour?!"

*STATIC*

Now, we see Dipper come into view, dressed with squeaky toys around his body and armed with golf club. "Okay I'm ready." he announced with a serious tone, dead set on finding the creature. "I've covered myself with armor." he pokes a toy with his club to show this. "I'm gonna capture that thing for science."

"And for candy!" Mabel added.

"Get this on tape in case I die or whatever." Dipper instructed his twin as he started to cautiously approach the candy thieving creature, both circled around each other then Dipper spotted some candy that the monster dropped and used his golf club to move it over to him so that it could jump to grab it, it worked but Dipper wasn't able to trap it inside a bucket as it dodged Dipper's trap with a jump and climbed up the ceiling.

Mabel shouted in alarm. "It's getting away! Die mutant, die!" she threw one of her stuffed bears but the creature hit it back to her. The twins gave chase to it once it went out of their room. "Save the candy!"

They arrived in the living room looking around. "Where is it? Can you see it?" Dipper asked, but it seemed to be nowhere in sight

"Wait, listen." Mabel told her brother as they heard something coming from the kitchen, they carefully peaked in and saw what they thought was the candy monster digging through the fridge. Sharing a tentative look, the twins tried to sneak up on it, and Dipper raised the club.

"Give us or candy back!" but as he swung it down, a familiar whip wrapped around it and threw it aside.

"Dude, what's the big deal?" the Pines twins were both surprised that instead of the monster that took their treats, it was actually Amethyst of all gems taking stuff from their fridge. "Can't a gem shop in peace?" she asked.

"Wha-Amethyst? Why are you at our house at this hour?" Dipper asked with an eyebrow raised. "Stealing all the food?"

The purple gem chuckled. "Heh, okay don't tell Stan, but I sometimes break in and take some grub from him, and by sometimes I mean all the time! And your uncle doesn't have a clue!" she cackled.

"Amethyst? Is everyone okay? I heard some noise, Mr. Pines didn't-oh hey Dipper, hey Mabel." the twins were once again taken by surprise when their friend Steven showed up.

"Steven? You're in on this too?" Mabel questioned,

The young half-gem scratched his nape. "Yeah, Amethyst needs a lookout in case Mr. Pines catches her. But what about you two? Shouldn't you be asleep?" he inquired.

"We actually were, until some pudgy little naked monster took our candy, now we're on the hunt for it." Dipper explained.

Amethyst's eyes lit up as soon as he she heard the description. "Wait, are you talking about-" But before she could finish, the candy monster grabbed on to Dipper's face, shocking Steven and Amethyst, though the latter quickly got over her initial shock and was replaced with a scowl. "You!" she used her whip to throw it off Dipper's face. "Time to settle the score!" she swiped at it but it got out of the way and ran past Mabel.

*STATIC*

"What was that thing?!" Steven asked as he helped Dipper up.

"The candy monster we told you about." Dipper answered.

"AKA a no-good dirty thief!" Amethyst clenched her fist. "I've been waiting for the chance to finally get that little snot!"

The kids shared a curious look, each acknowledging that their purple friend seemed more serious than usual, which is saying a lot. "Amethyst, do you know it?" Mabel asked.

"Know it? That little creep always managed to sneak into the temple and starts breaking stuff, I tried to catch it myself but it always gives me the slip." she scowled even further. "To make it worse, Garnet and Pearl always think it's me doing it since they've never seen it before, and if that wasn't enough, it always eats all the cool junk in my room! But this time I'll catch it and rub it in their faces that it wasn't me!" she proclaimed, punching a fist to an open palm.

"So...where is it now?" Steven nervously asked then dodged as an object was thrown straight at him. "Woah!" he looked to where it came from and gasped. "Up there in the fridge!" he pointed as the Candy Monster gorged on more of their treats.

"Oh no, someone do something!" Mabel shouted, Amethyst tried whipping it but it dodged each strike. "He's wasting all the candy, Dipper open your mouth! Try and catch the candy in your mouth!" she suggested.

Her twin looked at her incredulously. "What? No, why would I-" the candy monster threw some treats in his mouth and it surprisingly worked. "Actually, that's pretty good-OW!" he was hit by a big piece of candy as the candy monster jumped down and scurried across the kitchen.

"Ah, it getting away!" Steven shouted.

Amethyst's eyes narrowed. "Oh-ho no, not this time you little freak!" they chased it to the living room. "Alright, now it's time I drag you to the temple and show Garnet and Pearl that I wasn't the one breaking stuff, got it?!" she was confused when it didn't respond only a blank stare once it turned on the television. "Um hello? You candy freak, you listening?" They saw as it was transfixes by the images and sat on the chair.

"Look, it's hypnotized by the TV." Mabel observed.

"And he dropped the candy!" Steven cheered.

The purple gem couldn't believe it. "You gotta be kidding? All this time I could have nabbed it just by turning on some Tv? Talk about weak, thought it had more brains or something."

"I know, right?" Dipper agreed walking to it. "What a little dummy, glued to the...to the..." he couldn't finish his sentence as he saw the screen, being lost to its hypnotic powers as well. "Oh I love this movie." he smiled.

"Seriously Dipper?" Amethyst folded her arms turning to the screen. "This is just...this is...I'm sorry what were we talking about?"

*STATIC*

And so, Dipper, Mabel, Steven, Amethyst, and the candy monster helped themselves to some late hour movie. "Hey shouldn't we do something about the monster?" the male twin asked.

"Yeah, didn't you say you wanted to prove that it was the one making a mess in the temple, Amethyst?" Steven recalled.

She just shrugged her shoulders. "Hey man, I'm in no hurry. Besides they'll just come straight here once they notice Steven's not there."

It soon reached out to the golf club in a pleading manner after finishing the last one. "Aw don't worry fella, I got it." Steven said as he handed it the club and promptly ate it whole.

Soos then walked in. "Oh hey there little dudes, Amethyst, Grunkle Stan." the handyman's eyes focused on his supposed "boss".

"Well, I guess that's it for Dipper's guide to the supernatural." Dipper said to the camera. "The next episode will probably be about how to get rid of this candy-eating monster."

Soos whispered to said monster. "Psst! Stan, what's he talking about?"

*STATIC*