*TRIGGER WARNING*

Goren held open the door for Sirius, then closed it behind them as they walked out under the stars. "Why did you take so long in the toilets?"

"I told you, I was showering." Goren looked him over, a judgemental look coming from his eyes.

"Were you cheating on me? With Sirius? I see the way you look at him. When we were friends you even told me how you wish he was into guys because you thought you were in love with him. He went in there to get you. You took forever to come out." This shocked Sirius. Remus fancied him? How long? Since when?

"I... I don't anymore. You know I only fancy you." Sirius said, quietly. Subconsciously, he rubbed his aching forearm but stopped when he saw Goren's eyes follow.

"Again? Remus, baby, I told you not to do that to yourself." His eyes went soft, sincere. He gently grabbed Sirius's wrist and pushed his sleeve back. When Sirius tried to get his arm back, Goren only held on tighter, cutting off circulation to his hand. "What? I'm trying to help you and you decide it's not good enough? What? Did I hurt you as you hurt yourself?"

"No," Sirius whispered.

"That's right. I work so hard to always make sure you're happy. And for what? You just go and stab, what is this glass? Into yourself? I won't take it. You're deliberately trying to make yourself sad, you fucking psycho. This is all your fault. Why none of your friends actually love you." using his wand he conjured up a piece of glass and threw it at Sirius's face. "Go cut yourself some more, you stupid depressed bitch." Sirius took out Remus's wand, so glad he remembered to grab it and muttered a charm to heal the cut. After a few moments of silence and Goren's intense gaze, he picked up the glass and handed it to Sirius. "That was stupid." He placed it in his hand and Sirius looked up at him, puzzled. "You know what to do. What I say. When you do something like this, you have to live with it until it heals naturally. It's for your own good." Then he understood.

"No, no I can't," Sirius said almost panicked. "Please." He couldn't cut himself. He broke the habit a long time ago and he wasn't gonna start it again. He couldn't risk it, couldn't tempt it. Sirius couldn't count on him being strong enough again.

"Why are you acting like this? You're so whiny. You better be glad I'm here, if I wasn't no one would want you, or love you and your millions of flaws." Disappointment and disgust washed over his eyes. It made Sirius want to do anything he could to make him feel better, to make him happy and proud, to go back to having the charming smile he wore around others.Shakily, he looked at the glass and then his forearm. A tear escaped his eye as he let the sharp tip touch his skin. He pressed and drug it downward, suppressing a gasp. Not out of pain, out of relief. The thing he was scared of feeling most.

But something was wrong. It didn't feel right. He went too deep. Pressed too hard. Went too close to his hand. Sirius felt dizzy. "Stupid bitch, you made it worse!" He cast a silent charm on Sirius's forearm, partially healing the wound. "There. Now come on." He smiled an award-winning smile and led Sirius by his hand to a blanket he laid out. They lay under the stars and talked for a while. Moments of laughing fits and unbreakable smiles. They told stories they knew the other hadn't heard of. Sirius almost forgot he was supposed to be Remus, it just felt like he was getting to know Goren. He forgot all about what happened earlier. "Do you know any awesome constellations? I never asked."

"Oh yeah!" Sirius said, both excited and disappointed. He hated knowing the constellations and being named after them, but he loved the night sky and the stars. "I told Re- S- James. I told James how I love the night sky. It's so beautiful. The stars have a kind of lost, lonesome beauty about them. So isolated from each other... but so beautifully bright." His face flushed. That was too close. How long does polyjuice even last? he asked himself. An hour? Two? He had his answer when he felt his insides start to twist awkwardly. "See that one over there?" He asked, pointing across the sky, farthest left, and using his robe to mostly hide his face. He quickly snatched the bottle and downed the rest, then threw the bottle over the edge and dropped his arm. Luckily, Goren was still looking away. "That's Hercules. That one is Ursa Major. Ursa Minor. Orion." He said with a grimace. "The famous big and small dipper. Leo."

"They're all so beautiful. Goren turned his head and looked at Sirius. "Just like you." He rolled on top of Sirius, placing his hands on either side of him. He hadn't realized he felt safe with Goren until he didn't. Now everything in him was telling him to get out.

"Thanks," Sirius said awkwardly, trying to shift out from under him and sit up.

"What are you doing?" He asked. There was a new type of look in his eye. Sirius couldn't identify it, he'd never seen it.

"Just. I don't know. I don't want to get into all that right-"

" 'All of that'? That isn't really for you to decide now, is it? And I mean you owe it to me, don't you?"

"What do you me-"

"Oh come on." He cut Sirius off again. "I had the most perfect night planned. You ruined it by being all sad. Then you ruined it by making me think that you were cheating on me." Before Sirius could see it coming, Goren sat up on his knees and lifted his fist, then drove it into Sirius's only remaining unbruised side. "After that, like always, I had to be the one to fix you." He brought up his other fist and slammed it into his stomach. "Always. Maybe I don't wanna be the person to fix you." Sirius was expecting another hit, but instead, Goren grabbed his arms and held them down hear Sirius's head, making him cry out in pain. He had put a ton of pressure on his cut at the same time he accidentally kneed his bruised ribs. "But I do." Goren finished. "because I love you. And I know no one loves you as I can. I care for you as no one does. So I'm happy to help fix you. Because you're mine." He smiled. The look came back to his eyes, and Sirius knew now what it was. He tried to squirm away, but Goren just pressed him into the ground tighter. Right as Sirius opened his mouth to call out, Goren shoved his tongue down his throat, and Sirius bit down. Hard.

Clearly, he wasn't expecting this, he was probably expecting him to go along with this because he jumped back and cried out in frustration. "You bastard!" He yelled.

"Now, James!" And that's when Goren started hitting him. Earlier was practice round compared to this. What he was doing was worthy of Walburga. He was being hit over and over all around his torso, knees dug into his thighs, making it impossible to move. He barely had time to react and move his hands in front of his face when the hits started coming to his head. He was out after Goren hit his nose.