Author's Note:

First of all, I want to thank all readers for reviewing, following, choose it like a favorite etc. It was a really amazing surprise and it encouraged me to write more. I've taken your comments into consideration and there will be a full developed sex scene very soon. Please tell me if you still like it, reviews are really helpful. I'm also open to suggestions. And again, I apologize for any grammar mistake. Enjoy!

Fear

"Shut up," gasped Souichi, mashing their mouths together once again.

"No," the brunette whispered, drawing strength from God knows where to break the kiss and look into Souichi's blurry confused eyes. "I need you to tell me you want me…" The man sighed deeply. "Us…"

The blond's eyes widened.

"I really need it. I can't carry on like this, Senpai. I need to know there's something…real. " Tetsuhiro's voice lowered even more, it was barely audible. "I can't…" he sighed. "I can't act like nothing happened the next day, not anymore…"

Tetsuhiro's eyes were firmly closed, ready to be rejected once again. He loved Senpai in the deepest way it was possible and he had already given up on reaching Souichi's love for now, but he needed hope. Anything that would tell him he wasn't fantasizing anymore.

In the middle of his mental rambling, he decided to open his eyes and confront the reality of Senpai's reaction. It would hurt less if he knew the truth now and not after he had completely fallen for him….It made sense… Right? And if there was something he had learned about Souichi was that the older man needed things to make sense before acting in consequence.

Senpai looked up Morinaga's hopeful eyes, and debated to run away once again. Debated to insult him, tell him he was pushing his luck, that he was doing nothing but causing him harm. But…it wasn't true anymore, perhaps it never was… No, that was ridiculous.

He looked away, unable to hold Morinaga's gaze- trying to figure out how to show him he wasn't that reluctant anymore. That something had changed… But he was terrible with words, they always came out messed up and confusing and all he got was making things worse.

Was it even worth the risk? Remaining quiet and letting Tetsuhiro fall apart, lying to him in a way… by not telling him he could give him what he asked?

And all because of what?

Fear?

Souichi nodded, flashing Tetsuhiro a shy glance. It was as far as he could go. He looked up those green eyes, praying their owner would understand that he was giving in, letting himself go. For now.

Breathing heavily, Tetsuhiro brushed his fingers with the buttons of his Senpai's shirt. He could perceive his nervousness, his infinite doubts. But, above all- brand new determination.

And so Tetsuhiro waited, to let Senpai know he was the one in control. But the man didn't move- he broke eye contact for the first time in those never-ending seconds, closing his eyes and taking a mouthful of air to encourage himself.

Tetsuhiro hesitated, realizing the moment was crucial. It was his chance to show him that he really cared about him, and truly wanted to respect his wishes. To let him know he didn't mean to take advantage of him and all he wanted from Senpai was acceptance, affection… This was Tetsuhiro's chance to make Senpai feel safe.

Trembling like a leaf, the brunette planted a tender kiss on Souichi's forehead. The man responded by taking a deep breath. Was that a good sign?

He proceeded to the blond's cheeks and then slid down the corner of his mouth to press his lips ever so slightly against Senpai, attempting to soothe both men's nerves.

"I want you to be sure…" He murmured.

Senpai swallowed softly, glaring at the brunette. "Don't make me say it again."

Tetsuhiro nodded.

Even if he was a well experimented man when it came down to sex, somehow he felt like an unconfident teenager. He had no idea how to start or where to touch. All he could think was that there was too much to lose, and even more to gain. So he couldn't simply just decide it on the fly. And damn, he was already wasting too much time thinking about it. ut how could he not? It needed to be perfect or he would lose him… This time for good.

Senpai had already lost confidence, his body language had changed, he looked so…ashamed. All Tetsuhiro wanted to do was hug the fragile man in front of him, fondle him. But he knew Senpai needed him to go on, it was the delay what was making him unsecure.

Or so he thought.

The younger man felt as though he had stopped breathing when he felt his Senpai's lips kissing him firmly. Wasting no time, Tetsuhiro took the man's face with both hands and dived into his mouth in a mix of desire and fear.

Despite Souichi's fake attempts to break it, the kiss became more heated. Their tongues dancing with fury, struggling for that kiss to turn into trust.

The motion increased its pace until Morinaga's body was on top of Souichi's, sliding down his own shirt.

The brunette's fingers finally grazed the silky skin of the blond's bare chest and felt the blond's hands mirroring his actions.

Both men stopped, staring at each other- acknowledging the state of affairs. Souichi's amber eyes showed anxiety, fear and lust…making Tetsuhiro's self control a little bit harder to hold.

Slightly more confident, the man's mouth travelled all the way down Senpai's waist- guided by the soft moans escaping out of his lover's mouth. Stopping on every inch of his body, kissing and smoothening every tense muscle.

"Ah…"

Well… Fucking finally. What had been taking him so long? He really was an idiot. How much longer did the moron expect him to hold his 'yes'?

He was already regretting it. On one hand, his breath had become deeper and heavier, and his stupid voice was already tightening up. So, yes... In some sick twist of the present events, his body had ended up wanting him.

Very much so.

And even though he was taking his first steps into realization, those nagging ideas weren't fading away.

What the hell are you doing? You make me sick. This is disgusting. But you seem to enjoy it, so I guess you really are a hom-

Souichi squeezed his eyes, doing his best so the word 'Stop' wouldn't come out of his mouth. He couldn't do this to Morinaga, not again. He had…promised him in a way. Hell, when has he become so pathetic?

Alright, so he did want- Oh…

That feels so...fucking…good.

See? Homo.

"No! wai-! Ah…" Morinaga's kisses were spreading all over Souichi's hips and were now already heading down…making the blond's body writhe against his will.

And the first time Morinaga wasn't supposed to do what Souichi told him, the fucking moron stopped, forcing him to voice his true desire.

Fuck.

"Yes?"

Alright, it's not that hard. 'Go on', just say it.

"Uh…" Nothing came out.

"What is it, Senpai? Did I do something wrong?"

Fucking idiot.

"No, shut up," the blond managed to say.

Morinaga frowned slightly. "Uh? I wasn't saying-"

"I know, just do it now."

Shit.

"What?"

"Shut up!"

"Do you want me to shut up? I don't understand. I wasn't even-"

Souichi sighed in pure frustration. "Don't make me say it!"

"What? I don't know what you want me to do, Senpai! Do you need me to stop or go on or-"

"Yes."

Pathetic, just fucking pathetic.

Souichi's arousal seemed to build as the eagerness became stronger, for the first time in his life- he needed to be touched.

"Senpai…" Morinaga whispered, misinterpreting Souichi's attempts to communicate. "Talk to me…"

Now, say it.

Souichi turned his head aside, burying his face in a pillow.

Say it!

Morinaga's mind-twisting voice was coming closer, his warm lips brushing Souichi's ear, sending electric shocks up the man's spine.

"Senpai…?"

Don't…come…so…close… Just…fucking…

"Hurry the fuck up.

In a flash, the blond felt his body being pulled up and positioned against the wall. The cold concrete causing chills throughout his trapped body.

It was then that he noticed Morinaga's wet mouth, sucking the skin on his neck and gently spreading Souichi's legs. He could feel his heart hammering in his chest, hear his own breathing.

"Ah… Ahh… No… Ahh…Ahhh! Wait! Mori…"

Morinaga's devilish eyes glowed, while his lips curled into a sweet smile before kissing Souichi's smooth thighs.

"Just relax…"

"N-n-no… Ahh…"

"You're so delicious…"

"Don't tal- ahhh!" gasped Souichi when the brunette's tongue flickered in between his legs. His bangs jumping all over the man's shocked expression.

Morinaga was completely lost, driven by a blinding lust. Dying to evoke longer and louder moans from his lover, getting off with each little spasm in Senpai's trembling figure.

"Do you like it, my love?"

Souichi bit hard down on his lip, trying to shut himself up.

"Do you want me to go on?" the brunette continued.

Stunning Morinaga and himself, Souichi nodded- tangling his fingers with the dark strands.

In no longer than half a minute the Tetsuhiro's mouth was gently touching the burning flesh, making him release an inevitable moan.

No matter how achingly much he wanted to blow Senpai's mind and beyond- he couldn't. He simply couldn't afford to mess things up again.

So he backed off, despite the disturbingly erotic sounds that left Senpai's mouth as he did so.

"Are you- ah… are you fucking…" He gulped, struggling with consecutive shudders. "Are you fucking stupid?!" yelled the blond, mortified.

Author's Note #2:

If you've reached this point and you liked it, I'd like to propose a little game. There's a few questions I would love you to answer (And therefore, help me with the story)

Why do you think Morinaga thinks he can't mess things up again?

What is making Senpai change his mind and attitude towards Morinaga?

Why do you think Senpai is mortified right now?

Do you think Senpai is doing this for Morinaga, or for himself?