Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto (yet).

Neji was in a good mood.

The sky was cloudless, the flowers were blooming, and he had not miscounted a single bird within a 50-meter radius, despite his Byakugan's blind spot. But best of all, he was finally going home. Home to the Leaf Village's cheerful, colorful buildings. Home to team dinners at Ichiraku. Home to sparring (physically and verbally) with the two Green Beasts of Konoha.

And home to training sessions with Tenten.

Neji smiled (only slightly – he didn't believe in appearing TOO happy) as he strolled down the road, the pack slung over his shoulder suddenly feeling much lighter. Yes, he was in a very good mood.

"NEJI-KUN!"

Neji stiffened. Or rather, he had been in a very good mood. Using the past perfect verb tense always meant bad news.

A hand with nails painted a flagrant scarlet color clamped onto his right arm. "Wait for me!"

Seconds later, his left arm was rudely jostled by another hand, this time with nails painted purple with small daisy decals. "Get off of him, Ishiko. Neji-kun's MINE."

Neji saw a flash of red as Ishiko's hand shot out to push Miyuki. "You get off, Miyuki! Neji-kun would never want to be with someone like you!"

A purple flash sliced the air in front of Neji's face as Miyuki grabbed a handful of Ishiko's hair.

"He's mine!"

"No, he's mine!"

"Mine!"

"MINE!"

"You little slut, I'm going to –"

"Girls – PLEASE." Neji clamped a hand on each of their wrists and bodily removed the two fighting fangirls. "We are almost at the gates of the Hidden Rain Village. I am going to return you home safely, and then I will depart for Konoha."

Ishiko and Miyuki looked crestfallen. "But Neji-kun…" they whined simultaneously.

Miyuki blinked up at him with vacant violet eyes. "Stay with us in the Hidden Rain Village, Neji-kun! We'll make you so happy you won't even remember Konoha!"

Ishiko nodded vigorously, agreeing with her rival fangirl for once. "Yes, Neji-kun. You saved us from the scary Sound-nin – you're our hero!"

Neji closed his eyes and sighed. He really had to stop playing the hero all the time; it was such a nuisance. He could have been at the gates of Konoha by now if he hadn't stopped to rescue Ishiko and Miyuki, two empty-headed kunoichi from the Rain Village, from a band of Sound ninja.

"Oh, Neji-kun – your eyes are so beautiful! Don't tell us that we'll never be able to look into them again." Ishiko latched onto him, her scarlet fingernails digging painfully into his arm.

Miyuki, not wanting to be left out, dug her nails into Neji's other arm. "Shut it Ishiko. Only I'm allowed to tell Neji-kun how penetrating and pearly his eyes are." She sighed dreamily.

Neji cleared his throat and quickened his pace.

But the girls held on like leeches sucking the blood dry from a beleaguered victim. Miyuki stroked her hand through Neji's hair. "This is the most lustrous hair I have ever seen. The Leaf Village doesn't deserve it!"

Neji flinched at her touch. The pack slung over his shoulder was beginning to feel distressingly heavy again.

Ishiko giggled. "And his chest!" She slid a coy glance at him from under her lashes. "The muscles in his chest are so defined…so gorgeous."

Neji, who had been moving at a brisk and clipping pace, stopped in his tracks. "My – my chest?" he managed in a strangled voice. "How did you –"

Miyuki smiled and swatted him playfully. "Neji-kun, you're such a genius! Well, you've caught us… Ishiko and I were hiding in the bushes by the river yesterday when you were taking your bath."

Neji stared at her in wide-eyed horror.

A cat-like smile stretched across Miyuki's face. "Don't worry, Neji-kun. You were already in the water when we got there, and a bee stung Ishiko right before you got out." She paused to shoot a death glare at the other fangirl. "So we didn't get to see much."

Ishiko had a dreamy look on her face. "…Except your long, wet hair clinging to your god-like chest…and your sculpted shoulders gleaming in the moonlight…"

Hyuga Neji, who never once allowed shock or surprise to overtake his impassive features, felt his jaw drop.

Ishiko was still waxing rhapsodic. "…and the long, smooth column of your neck…and the sleekness of your defined abdomen…"

Neji was sure of it. This was his punishment for smirking at the Uchiha every time he passed a pack of his fangirls.

"…and your toned biceps coated with a sheen of river water…"

Desperate times called for desperate measures.

"Girls," he began, clearing his throat uncomfortably. "I would like to inform you that I have a…a…" He cleared his throat again.

"A girlfriend." The word sounded awkward on his tongue, clumsy and uneasy, like it didn't belong there.

Ishiko and Miyuki gasped. "No! Neji-kun, you're breaking our hearts!"

He trained his gaze straight forward. "I'm afraid it's true."

Miyuki stared at him with tear-filled eyes. "Well, who is it? Who is it that's taking our beautiful Neji-kun away from us?"

Neji had planned on ignoring her, he really did. But the name slipped out of his mouth before his mind could protest.

"Her name is Tenten."

This time, the words didn't feel awkward or clumsy at all. Rather, it felt like they had been sitting inside of him all along, waiting to be said.

The moment his mind caught up, Neji suffered a bout of total inner panic. (His face remained as emotionless as ever, of course). It didn't mean anything that he had said Tenten was his girlfriend. It was an act of self-defense. Self-defense! Surely no one could protest that infallible reasoning.

What was he expected to do when put on the spot? It was only natural that he should name his sole female teammate. It was as natural as saying that Sakura or Ino was his girlfriend. As natural as going into his kaiten whenever weapons were hurled at him. As natural as the leaves on the swaying trees that dotted the road.

At least, that was what Neji told himself all the way to the gates of Konoha.

-x-

Tenten gulped as she stared at the monstrous collection of frilly tops and gaudy skirts that lined the walls of the shop.

"Ino?" she ventured timidly. "I want to go home."

Ino's aqua-colored eyes narrowed dangerously as she grabbed Tenten's arm, forcibly dragging her back into the store. "No, Tenten! It's a crime against fashion to allow you to return to that tomboyish closet of yours. We need to get you some real clothes."

Tenten groaned as Ino loaded up on short skirts and minidresses. "Here. Hold these." Ino dumped the pile of clothes into Tenten's arms. It was the size of Chouji…post-expansion-jutsu. Tenten noted with dismay that the pile was predominately pink.

"Besides," Ino shot over her shoulder as she unloaded a mountain of low-cut tops into Tenten's arms, "it was you who asked me to take you shopping for some 'nice girly clothes', remember?"

Tenten nodded in resignation as she followed Ino deeper into the shop of girly horrors. This was all Sasuke's fault…

-x-

"Sasuke? I know this might be a touchy topic for you…but what do fangirls usually wear?" Tenten and Sasuke were at the training grounds, retrieving her weapons after they had finished sparring.

He grunted but was otherwise silent. It wasn't until after he had retrieved her katana that he finally spoke. "I don't know. Ask Ino."

Tenten smiled. "Ino – of course! She used to be one of your most devoted fangirls before she started going out with Shikamaru. They're so in love now that it completely slipped my mind." She had been about to let the topic drop when another thought struck her. "Hey, what about Sakura? Do you think she'll have any ideas?"

She was surprised to see Sasuke jolt and drop the handful of senbon in his hands. He stared at the scattered senbon needles for a long time before speaking.

"I don't think so."

Tenten was about to ask him more, but she stopped when he abruptly turned his back and crouched down to pick up the fallen senbon.

She had thought their conversation all but over when he suddenly spoke again, his voice soft in the waning light.

"She won't – not anymore."

-x-

And so, after five hours of grueling shopping, Tenten found herself the owner of three halter tops, two scandalous dresses, five blouses, six dangerously short skirts, four pairs of uncomfortable shoes, and one staggering credit card bill.

She was ready.

Author's Note: Hope you all enjoyed this installment of "Not Another Sasuke Fangirl." Thank you so much for the wonderful reviews…and SmilesLasting for the best first review ever! (They totally inspired me to finish the second chapter in record time). I guess I was suffering from Neji withdrawal in the first chapter…so I had to make up for it with the Neji fangirls in this chapter. :) And I just couldn't resist the little hint of SasuSaku… Reviews welcome and encouraged! Thanks for reading!