[Quinn's journal]
Rachel Berry.
One could say she's the most wanted girl in school, outside of me, Santana, and Brittany, of course… the outspoken diva with an affinity for stealing my boyfriends.
There was once a time when no one knew her name. She was still the same ambitious singer she is today, but no one paid her any mind. No one noticed the tiny brunette striding down the halls with some hidden purpose in her step, so full of talent that no one was willing to take note of – I miss those days.
Back then, the only people who knew her were the ones who slushied her… myself included. Even Karofsky didn't know her name; he only slushied her because I asked him to. Times were simple then. The social hierarchy was in full effect: everyone was in their own place. Of course it was only an amount of time before the petite diva made herself heard… and who knew how many people would eventually stop to listen.
Finn was the first; my steady boyfriend and the "father" of my unborn child. Granted, the child wasn't really his, but it doesn't change the circumstances. At the time he believed he was the father… but he still drifted towards her. The giant oaf, how dare he?
Then Puck came into the picture. I'm not sure I ever really understood what was going on there. For Puck, it was probably just because Rachel was a warm body… but for reasons I'm sure I'll never understand, the juvenile delinquent still has a soft spot for the girl even today.
And lastly there was the whole Jesse St. James debacle. I still have mixed feelings about that. I didn't know the guy… he didn't go to our school so technically I couldn't blame him for having such horrid tastes. However, I still didn't like him. He was almost like the male version of Rachel herself. Blech.
Outside of boyfriends, though, she's also gathered a good handful of friends. They're all from Glee, of course, but they even hang out outside of practice now… or so I've heard. Who knew Mercedes would take such a liking to the annoying girl? Kurt as well. I could've sworn they would have more sense than that, but apparently not. Tina and Artie I could understand; before Glee, they didn't really have any friends themselves. Even Brittany claims Rachel as a friend now.
But the most shocking of all I found out only earlier today… Santana Lopez… may or may not have shown interest in getting into Rachel Berry's pants.
WHAT?
What is going on with everyone lately? Have they secretly formed some Rachel Berry fan club? Do they meet after school to watch Funny Girl, eat kosher, non-dairy snacks, and sing show tunes in their animal sweaters until their voices give out?
What is wrong with the world today?
I liked it better when no one knew her name.
I liked it better when no one had ever heard her sing.
I liked it better when no one wanted her.
It doesn't make sense to me. I mean, the girl is highly irritating. The way she can never give you a simple answer; she always rambles on for ages, using complex sentence structures complete with scholarly vocabulary words that the rest of the club cannot keep up with. She's self-centered… which makes sense considering she's determined to be a star one day, but that is center of her ENTIRE world – "Me, me me," "MY solos," "MY stardom," "BlahBlahBlah." – nothing else exists. The way she dresses also leaves something to be desired. I never used to have a problem with argyle – I even liked it at some point in time – but she wears it every. single. day. And not just on her shirt. Sometimes it's even on her knee high socks… which, at one point in time, may have been cute, but now it's just grotesque. And there's no need to mention the fact that she's an attention whore. Granted, that probably stems from her desire to be a star, but it doesn't make her any less annoying. I doubt she ever really cared for Finn. She simply threw herself at him because he was the star quarterback and he showed her an ounce of attention. Stupid girl.
She was even annoying when she was a kid, if I recall correctly. I remember we played in our school's production of Annie together. She was Annie, of course, though she really didn't fit the role… physically. She was always so tiny; back then she looked even more fragile than she does now. But Annie was supposed to be one of the older girls… in other words taller… that didn't matter, though; Rachel still got the part. I played the part of one of her friends. We were in practically every scene together, except for when she was at "Daddy Warbuck's" mansion. We huddled together on the bed while we waited for Mrs. Hannigan's tirade to end, we danced around each other while we were forced to clean the bathrooms… stuff like that.
The part was easy enough for me to play, but Rachel didn't really fear me then like she does now. Nowadays when we meet face to face, she gets all fidgety and nervous. I'm proud to say that even though she feels more comfortable at school now with her newfound friends, she's still afraid of me… as she should be.
But back then she looked at me differently…
Her eyes were always wide, and maybe a bit… hopeful? I guess she didn't know the difference between acting and real life. That didn't stop her from clinging to me, though. Every rehearsal she'd get a little braver: she'd scoot just a little bit closer to me on the bed or she'd hug me just a little bit tighter before she left the orphanage. Granted, I never really discouraged the interaction, but I was acting… that's what actors do!
Okay, so I'll admit that maybe I didn't find her so annoying back then. Her girl ambition was ever present, but… she wasn't entirely unbearable. I may have even thought it cute that she rambled when she got nervous… or that she always sought me out when we had breaks from rehearsal. The woman playing Mrs. Hannigan actually freaked her out, ironically, and I thought it was funny… though I never hesitated to hide with her when the mean ole red headed lady came around.
So… maybe Rachel had her moments… and maybe I actually, once upon a time… kind of, sort of… liked the girl.
It wasn't until our last performance that I was set straight. My parents had finally made it to see me perform on the last day we had the show. They were so proud of me; they came backstage to bring me flowers. Of course, that was when they saw the tiny brunette clinging to my side, hurriedly ushering me to meet her two fathers. My own father had words with me that night. He told me that I wasn't allowed to hang out with her anymore… that her fathers were sinners and that she was bred into sin. I didn't see it. Rachel was… innocent… and kind of cute in her own way. How could my father say she was a sinner?
I didn't ask questions, though. I only acted the way I was expected to.
The next day Rachel Berry came up to hug me and I swiftly dumped my slushie on her head.
My reign of terror had begun.