(Chapter 12 - Four and Tris climb the Ferris wheel)
"That's the sissy way out," says Uriah. "I vote we go all out. Hide the flag well enough that they can't find it."
An argument erupts, and everyone shouts their ideas for how to win this game. With a sigh, I back up to the edge of the carousel behind me and take a seat. I picked my team to be fast, and now they are using up their lead. Still, I can't help but have a good feeling about tonight.
I look up, and I notice how quiet the night sky is. Mostly dark, with a small moon and some thin clouds. The noise of the team's conversation seems to subside, and I can hear my own breath.
Out of the corner of my eye, I notice someone moving away from the group. My eyes dart towards the figure, and it's Tris. I wonder what she's doing. She moves quickly, and I get up before she's out of sight.
Without making any noise, I make my way around the rest of the team, who are still deep in argument. I follow behind her at a distance, and she stops when she reaches the bottom of the Ferris wheel. Oh no. As she hesitates on the first rung of the ladder, I catch up to her.
"Tris," I say, quietly.
"Yes?" she says. She seems unsurprised, as though she knew I was there.
"I came to find out what you think you're doing." Please don't climb this.
"I'm seeking higher ground," she says firmly. "I don't think I'm doing anything." She can be funny sometimes.
"All right," I decide. I take a deep breath. "I'm coming."
"I'll be fine," she says. I know you'll be fine, I think. It's me I'm worried about.
"Undoubtedly," I say, and she starts ascending the ladder. After a moment, I grab the first rung and start climbing after her.
Soon, our steps are steady, and we are in sync with each other. I know better than to look down, but I am all too aware of how high off the ground we are getting. I need to focus on something else.
"So tell me…," I say. "What do you think the purpose of this exercise is? The game, I mean, not the climbing." I focus on keeping my breaths deep, but I can feel my lungs tightening up already.
"Learning about strategy," she says. "Teamwork, maybe." She continues to climb with hesitation.
"Teamwork," I repeat. Unfortunately, this is not the case.
"Maybe not," says Tris. "Teamwork doesn't seem to be a Dauntless priority." Right.
"It's supposed to be a priority," I say. "It used to be." But not anymore. I try to take slow breaths as I continue to climb, but my mind is wavering.
"Now tell me," I continue. "What do you think learning strategy has to do with… bravery?"
"It… it prepares you to act," she says. "You learn strategy so you can use it."
Suddenly, Tris stops climbing, and she is quiet. "Are you alright, Four?" she asks.
I realize that my breathing is loud and fast. The inside of my body is shaking. This isn't normal. "Are you human, Tris? Being up this high… It doesn't scare you at all?"
Before she can answer me, a gust of wind swings Tris swiftly to the right, and she loses her balance. Without thinking, I reach out to block her body from falling off the ladder. I grab her hip, and I firmly guide her back to the center. By chance, I brush the skin of her waist with my finger, and the warmth shocks me. Suddenly, I'm not thinking about how high we are anymore.
"You okay?" I say.
"Yes," she says. We continue to climb in silence, and we reach the platform soon after.
She turns to me. "You're afraid of heights. How do you survive in the Dauntless compound?"
"I ignore my fear," I say. "When I make decisions, I pretend it doesn't exist." I look at her, and I try to catch my breath, and I am silenced by the steadiness in her eyes. Like she can see straight into me.
"What?" I say, a little defensively.
"Nothing," she says, and she looks away. I don't want to look anywhere but at her. And after surveying the view, she looks up at the Ferris wheel and says, "We're not high enough. I'm going to climb." Of course.
"For God's sake, Stiff," I say.
"You don't have to follow me," she says, and she begins to climb up the crossed bars of the Ferris wheel.
"Yes, I do." I start climbing, and I focus on her. Her hands, her feet, her movements.
Soon, we are high enough to see the entire city skyline.
Tris has stopped climbing. She points an area near the end of the pier. "See that?"
I catch up to her, and standing right behind her, I look over her shoulder. "Yeah." A green flag. She found them. Of course she did.
I realize how close I am standing to Tris and how close her face is to mine. I can almost feel the heat off her skin, but the cool night breeze carries it away. My breath has steadied.
"It's coming from the park at the end of the pier," I say. "Figures. It's surrounded by open space, but the trees provide some camouflage. Obviously not enough."
"Okay." She turns to look at me. For the first time tonight, she looks like she's lost focus for just a moment. "Um… Start climbing down. I'll follow you."