Dear Someone,

You know when I thought of the hero that the girls painted for me, I thought he was going be some buff, tan, hairy chested, loincloth wearing, butt chinned, hunk of a man. Boy, was I disappointed beyond comparison. But I'll get to him later let me first describe the villain here first.

Lets see, I would describe the old wizard as… creepy beyond all reason. My back was turned to the icicle bars and I was watching the princess's converse with each other like this happened to them every other day. They talked about the weather, their kingdoms they even talked about what type of hair soap they used to get their hair to stay like that or like this. Blah, blah, blah, boring girl talk. Even though I didn't listen a lot about what they were saying it was cool watching them interact with each other considering I've never seen people like them before.

Slowly I noticed all of their conversations were coming to a stop. They were looking at me with ether fear or hatred. Which confused me for a second until I felt a puff of cold breath go down my neck. Goosebumps and hair raised on the back of my neck. Slowly glancing behind me I saw a pair of black beady eyes set inside a light blue face, a noes so long that it could have been a foot, and a white beard covering half his face.

"Hi," he said in a voice that's high-pitched and nasally for a man.

I don't know what came over me but after he said hi to me I was so startled that I yelped and jumped back away from the bars and backed up to stand by the girls. He was wearing a dark blue robe and his beard almost reached the floor. His hair was just as white as his beard and on top of his head sat a large golden, three-point crown with three red jewels set into it. The creep was giving us a crooked smile.

"Oh, Fionna, I'm so glad your awake. I have so many stories to tell you. I'm sorry for the conk on the head but I couldn't of let you run away from me."

"Ice King, let us out of here," demanded Princess Bubblegum.

The way she talked to him sounded almost mechanical like she's had this conversation with him all the time.

"So you ladies want out, do you? Did you girls decide who will be my bride among yourselves," his bushy white eyebrows went up and down a couple of times in a quick motion.

Everybody in the room groaned, "How many times do I have to tell you this, Ice King, we will never want to marry you," Princess Bubblegum said slowly like she was talking to a child.

"Oh, that's just because you don't know enough about me yet," he said unfazed, "Once you ladies stay here longer I'm sure you won't be able to resist my charms."

Again everyone groaned. Some even face palmed themselves.

"Fionna, come here I want to show you the fanfictions I wrote about you and Cake."

I was hesitant to go towards the guy. He just oozed craziness and creepiness and the girls beside me were signaling me not to go. But for some reason I felt a bit of sympathy for the old man. It's obvious the guy just wants a friend, who's willing to be his friend is beyond me. But I'm willing to be a little nice to him.

Walking towards him I said sternly, "My name isn't Fionna, it's Crystal."

"Of course your name is Fionna, you look just like her."

"Nooooo, just because I look like her doesn't mean I am her," I was standing in front of him now.

"Yes it does."

"Alright then, if I'm from your fanfiction stories, how do you explain me being here?"

"By my magic, silly. I've been trying spell after spell trying to get you and Cake here. Right now I'm having my snow men searching for your cat sister so she can't rescue you."

Now I face palmed myself as well. The old man was having a bad case of tunnel vision. Then the Ice King slid a couple of books through the jail bars handing them to me. The covers of the books were crude and looked like they were drawn by a child. The covers all had the same two people doing something together, a white cat with orange spots and a girl wearing what I had on right then.

"Oh, read my first fanfiction," he pointed excitedly.

The book he was pointing to had a picture of the girl in a fighting position holding a pinkish-red sword. In front of her was what looked like a womanly version of the Ice King stepping out of something pink? In the background it looked like they were in a bedroom and someone was frozen to a wall. The title said Adventure Time with Fionna and Cake: Book One.

I was about to open it when we heard a crash.

The Ice King gasped, "That must be Finn and Jake. They're the inspiration that helped me create you. Oh I can't wait for you to meet them, if only Cake was here."

There was more crashing sounds then a giant shattering of what sounded like glass; signaling their entrance. The Ice King turned towards the sound.

"Let the princess's go, Ice King," shouted a young boys voice.

"Yah, let them ladies go man," said a deep male voice.

All of the girls started to do one of ether three things. Some swooned, some shouted words of encouragement to them. Or they stayed quiet like I did. Actually I was the only quiet one.

"Ah, Finn, Jake I'm so glad to see my two best friends. There is someone here I would like you to meet."

He stepped aside so I finally had a view of the hero the girls praised so much. What I saw was a boy and his dog. The boy had on black shoes and ankle high socks. He was wearing blue shorts and a light yellow sweeter. On his head he was wearing a white hat like what I had on but instead of bunny ears they were bear ears. The little guy looked no younger than thirteen or fourteen years old. In his grasp was a green samurai sword. The dog was standing on its hind legs. He had orange fur and floppy ears with a big black nose set in the middle of his face. They both stared at me in shock.

"Fionna, meet Finn and Jake," he pointed to the boy then to the dog, "Finn, Jake, meet Fionna your counter part Finn."

They were speechless for a couple of seconds, "You mean the girl from your stupid fanfiction that you made my man listen to," the dog said in a surprised deep voice.

I was surprised that the dog could talk but what surprised me even more was the Ice King.

"My fanfiction is not stupid," he yelled angrily putting on the scariest looking face I ever seen, then he flew up.

Let me repeat myself because I don't think your reading this right if you're not shocked yet. The man. Flew... With. His. Beard. Like how a bird flaps its wings. Then he started shooting icy beams from his hands at Finn and Jake. Finn ducked, jumped, tucked and rolled. The boy was amazing with that sword, he cut through the ice like it was butter. It was funny when he made sculptors from the ice, he did a rabbit, a duckling, and a copy of his head. Jake was just as amazing, he grew ten times his original size and tried to swat the Ice King like the way you would a fly.

All of this was over whelming me so much that I had to grip the bars to keep myself from collapsing. Taking a couple of deep breaths I dug out my knife from my backpack. Slipping my arm through the bars I forced the knife into the lock. After a couple of failed attempts I finally unlocked the door. I signaled the girls over to me.

"What is it Crystal," Princess Bubblegum asked.

I swung open the door with a smirk.

"All right girl," Slime Princess congratulated as she passed me.

"Great job," Princess Bubblegum continued.

"I could of done it myself if I wanted to," Lumpy Space Princess stated.

"Thank you," said Wildberry Princess gratefully.

Raggedy Princess gave me a nod.

"Yes, thank you," Doctor Princess added.

I watched them file out of the room while Ice King was distracted. I was about to follow them out but then a stray ice bolt flashed by me and broke the icicle bars sending me flying back as well. I hit my back hard against the opposite side of the cell wall, hitting my head against it. I only passed out for a second; I know this because they were still fighting each other when I woke back up.

Getting up I grabbed a piece of cell door. When I was standing outside of the cell I saw that the Ice King's back was towards me. He was yelling at the boys saying something about defending the honor of his fanfiction character. With the icicle still in hand I walked up to the Ice King from behind. Then in a batting stance I swung the icicle bar with all my might and made contact with the back of his head, breaking the bar in half. Making a very satisfying cracking sound. Then the Ice King slumped to the floor like a sack of potatoes.

Looking up at the boys their faces were full of surprise and shock. The dog returned to his normal size and the boy's sword disappeared under his sleeve sweeter. Looking back down I grabbed the crown off of the ground and sat it on top of my head. Then I gave Finn and Jake a quick nod and a smile and walked out of the room whistling a tune while swinging the broken bar in a circle.