Author's note: I don't own anything!

Voldemort sat at a Judging table with Bellatrix and Narcissa and somehow Voldemort had bribed Ron Weasley to be a judge. "Right so here is the deal! I'm looking for four to five bootylicious dudes to be in my band. It's gonna be the hottest boy band ever!" he explained

Bellatrix and Narcissa nodded, while Ron was distracted by a delicious sausage that Narcissa was eating. "Can I have some?" he asked.

"No," she icily stated.

He curled up into a little ball and rocked himself back and forth.

"Right so first up it says here that we have Severus Snape!"

Snape entered the judging room wearing shades and a leather jacket and leather pants. "So, who are you?" Voldemort asked pretending to not know who Snape was.

"I'm Severus Snape, and I'm the total ladies man," he grinned as he pulled out a brush and slicked his hair back.

Voldemort was staring at Snape's six pack. "When did you get that?" Ron asked.

"There are many things you don't know about your professor Ron," Snape smiled.

"Okay so if you were in my band? What would you like to sing?" Voldemort asked.

"Anything! I have a voice that is so smooth, the ladies will love it," bragged Snape.

"All right, enough chatter, sing for us Snapey," Narcissa giggled.

Snape took a moment and then broke out into song:

"GIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRL OF MY HEARRRRRRRRRRRT! I LOVE YOU!!!! YEAH BABY OHHHHH!

YOU ARE MY HEART!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE MY LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I LOVEEEEEEE YOU!"

Snape had a smooth voice and it brought everyone to tears, including Voldemort. "That was so beautiful," Voldemort sobbed.

Bellatrix stared at Snape and asked, "Since when could you sing?"

Narcissa was fanning herself because his song set her on fire. Ron was cheering. "We will get back to you asap," Voldemort smiled.

Snape walked out of the room and back to the castle. "I think he made it into the band," Voldemort clapped.

"Who else is up today for auditioning?" asked Bellatrix.

"It says here next is Draco Malfoy!" Ron read to himself.

Draco strutted in and was dressed like he was going to a ballroom dance. He had a nice tux on and had a smile plastered on his face. "Can you resist this?" he asked as his hands smoothed his tux from top to bottom.

"Yeah I can," Ron said.

Narcissa ran up to her son and tried to fix his tie. "You messed it up my little Drakey Poops!"

"MOM STOP! You're embarrassing me!"

The Dark lord was filming the whole thing. "This is so going to be put up on the internet!" he chuckled.

Bellatrix was shaking her head and Ron was trying not to laugh. "Right so Narcissa! We have auditons, can this wait?" Bellatrix asked.

"Sorry," she sat down.

Voldemort stared at Draco and said, "You said I was too old to be in a boy band."

"I apologize my lord."

"Well aren't you a little too young to be in a boy band?"

"No!" Draco pleaded, "I'm old enough! I can be the boy soprano!"

Draco started to sing:

"I LIKE CHEESE! I LIKE CHEESE! I LOVE CHEEESE!"

Voldemort covered his ears, while Narcissa was clapping along with Draco. Ron threw a turkey leg at Draco which hit him square in the head. "NEXT!" Voldemort called.