Title: The Wombat Series
Chapter: 2
Pairing: House/Wilson, microscopic mentions of House/Stacy, Wilson/Amber.
Rating: G for total fluff.
Warning(s): Totally AU: a kid!fic where the Ducklings are House & Wilson's kids. Chapter Three/Four: slight mentions of House's dysfunctional family, general backgrounds.
Disclaimer: House, Wilson, Cuddy & respective ducklings are not mine. I wish, but alas, they aren't.

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The entire day had been unbearably hot and the only thing the air conditioner was actually doing was hanging out in the garbage can. It had a dramatic death the night before, sounding more like a 747 rather than a home appliance. James had every intention of making his husband buy him a new air conditioner when he got out of work. Until then, he grabbed his clothes for work, and dressed after taking an ice cold shower. He made their son's lunch, made House's lunch, and made his own before rousing the elder doctor from his sleep.

"Wilson, turn on the damn air conditioning..." House groaned from the bedroom. "It's hot," he whined petulantly after his request went unnoticed.

"For the fifth time, you were there when the air conditioner died. If you're really that uncomfortable, get up and take a cold shower." James answered from the kitchen, with his hands on his hips.

"Will you take one with me?" The smirk on House's face was more than evident in his voice.

"House, I don't want you talking like that in front of Robbie. Get ready for work, we have air conditioning there. I don't want to be late."

With a groan, the elder doctor did as he was told and hobbled into the bathroom. Soft knocks sounded on the lower part of the door, signaling Robbie's entrance.

"Hiya Daddy!"

"Hi Wombat, are you ready for kindergarten?" his Daddy called over the shower curtain and the falling water.

"Of course, Daddy. I just need to brush my teeth. Papa said he didn't want me to have any cavities. What are they?"

"Cavities?"

"Yeah... what are cavities, Daddy?"

"A figment of your Papa's imagination." House smirked as he finished washing his hair.

"What's a figment?"

"Brush your teeth, Wombat." His Daddy chuckled before turning off the water. He wrapped a towel around his waist and eased himself out of the shower. Walking by his son, he mussed the bright blonde locks of hair and went to go change.

"Okay!"

By the time that House was ready and walking into the kitchen, Robbie and Wilson were both waiting with their lunches in hand. Wilson grabbed House's lunch and the keys to the car off of the island in the kitchen. House walked over to Wilson and kissed him softly before heading over to Robbie for a hug.

"Alright, Wombat. Daddy's going to have to stay late tonight. Aunt Cuddy called a few minutes ago and said I have a big case to work on. Papa's going to pick you up after day care and you two can have dinner together. Sound like a plan?"

"Okay, Daddy!"

"Good. Save me some dinner," House smiled and grabbed the little one's hand. The two of them walked outside to the car, followed by Wilson.

--

Wilson was excited to have some bonding time with his son. They often had dinner together if House was busy with a case, but he had planned hair cuts for the two of them for this evening. He had a bright smile on as he drove towards the day care provider.

Robbie was waiting excitedly for his Papa at the door. When Wilson walked into the building, his little Wombat jumped right into his arms with a resounding, "Hi Papa!" Soon, the pair were seated in the car and driving towards the centre of town.

"We need to get our hair cut before dinner, alright sport?"

"Okay, Papa! But my hair isn't long, why do I have to get my hair cut?"

"So it can grow."

"Why do I have to cut it so that it can grow?"

Wilson smiled back at Robbie through the rear view window. "I don't know, Wombat. Sometimes, things are silly."

"Oh. Okay. Can I have spikes in my hair?!"

"Spikes? How come?"

"'Cause Riley and his brothers have spiky hair! It's really cool, Papa!"

"You're just like your Daddy, you know that?"

"It's really, really cool! It just stands up in the middle!"

"I suppose your hair can grow back in, and your Daddy will be quite amused with your hair..."

"Can I, Papa!? Please?! I'll be really good! I'll brush my teeth so I don't get cavities!"

"You should brush your teeth anyway. But, yes, you can have spiky hair," he chuckled.

--

The hair dresser knew exactly what Robbie wanted done to his hair -- a mohawk -- and although Wilson would rather his son have a crew cut, he allowed it. Just this once. Once both men were done, Wilson took a picture of his son's new haircut with his phone and sent it to his husband for approval.

It was no surprise, that while Wilson and Robbie were walking through the pet store right next to the salon, Wilson received a text message saying, "Can't believe you let him. Totally my kid. Get Chinese food. See you tonight."

--

Wilson wasn't exactly ready to head home yet, so he ordered the Chinese food to be delivered, which wouldn't arrive for another 30 minutes. He took his son over to the Walgreen's to pick up a few things for home, and a pint of ice cream. The two walked outside and sat on the bench, sharing their moose track ice cream - Robbie's choice - and talked about the animals they had seen at the pet shop.

Once the ice cream was gone and the mosquitos were coming out to bite, Wilson cleaned the two of them up, and drove back home for their dinner.

"Papa, why did we have ice cream before dinner?"

"Because ... 'life is uncertain, you should eat dessert first'."

"But... you never let me eat dessert first!"

"Sometimes it's okay," he smiled once again.

"Like when?"

"Like today."

"Why today?"

"Because I'm your Papa and I said so."

"Okay, Papa!"

--

They arrived home with plenty of time before the Chinese food arrived. He and the little Wombat ate their dinner and watched Spongebob and The Fairly Odd Parents. Robbie managed to curl up against his Papa and giggled through his evening programs. Wilson soon put the boy to bed and started to heat up dinner when House got a ride home from Cuddy. She opened the door and walked into the small apartment.

"So, I hear my nephew has a mohawk?"

"Yeah. You can sneak in if you'd like to see, I just put him to bed."

"I will, though House needs your help outside," she smiled and walked into the other room.

Wilson went right out and House was leaning against the trunk of Cuddy's car.

"What do you need help with?"

"I can think of ten different things you could help me with," he leered at the younger doctor, "Though there is a rather heavy box in the trunk that I can't carry."

House turned around and opened the trunk, revealing a large box.

"Is that what I think it is?"

"A box. Yes. You're so smart, that's why you're my Boy Wonder." House rolled his eyes.

"Bastard. I meant...," James picked up the box with a little effort, and answered his own question. "Oh House, you got us an air conditioner!"

"Correction. I got myself an air conditioner. You happen to sleep in the same bedroom as I do, so you get to use it, too." He smirked, before his face brightened up. "Oh, by the way, I do believe this," he pulled a thin plastic card out of his back pocket, "is yours."