I shut my truck's door with hardly a touch, and walked up the front steps. I stepped through the door and kicked off my boots. Realizing I'd messed up the entry carpet, I bent down to straighten it out – a gesture I wouldn't have bothered with two months ago… I shook my head, forcing the tears back where they belonged.
"Bells?" Charlie called from the kitchen.
"It's me." I said as I walked through the wooden frame to see him reading today's paper at our small kitchen table. October 31st. Halloween, it said.
"I bought some candy for the trick or treaters, in case we actually get any this year," he said with a harrumph. "Would you mind answering the door in case anyone comes knocking?" he eyed me as he spoke. "I've got some paperwork that needs filling out down at the station. You don't mind being alone, tonight, do you?"
"No dad, I'm fine. I'll get the door."
"Okay… do you want me to order pizza tonight?"
"No, I'll get it now," I walked to the fridge and took out last night's stir-fry pasta. I carefully unwrapped the plastic wrap, grabbed a fork and pushed the contents of the leftovers into two microwavable bowls. I stuffed them both into the microwave and hit the timer. While that heated up, I grabbed two glasses from the cupboard and milk from the fridge, and poured us both a cup.
"Thanks, Bells." I just nodded to myself.
We ate dinner in silence, there was nothing to say about my day, and not much to tell about his, probably. I'd woken up, skipped breakfast, gone to school, and come directly home. I hadn't spoken to anyone, I hadn't been called on in class, and the lunch table had seemed other worldly to me. Had I even eaten lunch?
I pushed my food around aimlessly, and eventually packed it back up as leftovers for tomorrow. I drained my milk, I did feel a little dehydrated, grabbed my back pack and ran up the stairs without a word to Charlie. I sat down at my desk in my room, a place where I'd spent multiple hours of time as of a little over a month and a half ago. I grabbed my textbooks out, dug for a sharpened pencil, and went to work.
It was a little over an hour later when Charlie called up, "Bella, I'm leaving now. Don't forget about the trick or treaters." The door shut about thirty seconds after I didn't respond.
The first knock at the door came around seven thirty. It was a couple of two year old caterpillars in the arms of their parents, little jack 'O lantern buckets in their laps.
"Trick or treat!" their parents said enthusiastically. I took some mini snickers out of the bowl Charlie had left out, and tossed them into their buckets.
"Say thank you, Tommy." One mommy said, waving her baby's hand. It moved its lips, but the only thing that came out was goo. "Well, thank you Bella, anyways." Then with that, they turned around and left.
I ran back up the stairs to be by myself. I tried to keep my mind off of things that I knew would lead to tears and more aching in my already shattered heart. I stuck my chin out and crossed my arms as I started my computer. I waited patiently staring at the grains on my desk, trying to see patterns through nothing.
The doorbell rang.
I groaned and pushed myself away from the desk. Hopping down the stairs too fast, I lost my footing and crashed into the wall. I longed for the arms of steel that used to catch me there. I pushed back some more tears as the throbbing of the empty hole in my chest grew.
I clutched the door handle and heaved back, grabbing the bowl of candy from the side table. I opened the screen door to see who was next in line for an awful dentist appointment.
What was standing there sent the air whooshing back through my lungs. I flew myself at the figure in the frame of the door, and felt their arms twine around mine, holding me tightly against their chest. I began to sob, to let out all the pain that I'd been holding back, not just that night, but for over a month.
"Bella," Edward whispered into my hair.
"Edward, Edward. Oh Edward," I pulled back the smallest amount to look at his glorious face, "It's really you. You're here…" I paused and sucked in another breath. "Why are you here?" I threw myself back into his arms despite myself, not caring if he was only there for a brief moment, I couldn't bear it if he left in thirty seconds.
"I couldn't do it, Bella. I just couldn't." he whispered to me, and he sound like he wanted to cry too.
"Do what?" I sniffed into his neck.
"I couldn't stay away. I couldn't do it. I told you I didn't want you. I lied. I love you, please, please forgive me, Bella. Please."
"Of course," I mumbled and clutched him closer.