A/N I don't know if it's any good, hope you like it. Charliespike18x
The morning dawned cold and grey. Raymond had left after I had finished stitching his face and Bobby had gone an hour or so later. My thoughts kept drifting back to what Raymond said, had he really meant it? I sat in Nonnatus houses' kitchen mulling over that question and eating a piece of toast when Cynthia entered and took the seat next to me.
"Are you alright?" She asked taking a piece of toast for herself.
"He'd be good for you, Bobby I mean. It's obvious that he likes you." I replied, not answering her question. Cynthia was about to answer when Jenny rushed in.
"Trixie, help. Help, please," She begged. I stood and went over to her.
"What's wrong?" I replied.
"It's Jimmy. Francine has gone it to labour. He wants our help." Jenny said, panic rising in her tone.
"Come on then," I said, following Jenny to the bike rack.
…
When we arrived and Francine and James Wilson's house 20 minutes later I was still thinking about Raymond. Jenny had rapped on the door and Jimmy had shown us up to Francine's room. Her room had bright white walls and a large double bed, the duvet was the colour of the sea. There was a small table next to the bed, it had a crime novel – Taken at the Flood by Agatha Christie- splayed open on Raymond just wouldn't leave me alone, especially when I saw Francine Wilson and realized what her maiden name was. Francine Wilson, nee Spencer, younger sister to Antony Spencer and twin sister to My Raymond. No, not my Raymond, he hadn't been by Raymond in a long time.
Jenny was outside talking to Jimmy when she first spoke to me.
"Beatrice Franklin, what a surprise," She exclaimed "I don't want you here," Francine said quieter. Her voice was just like I remembered it.
"Why?" I said, feigning ignorance, as Francine screamed out in pain as another contraction gripped her.
" Bea…. I think….. you do," She panted, gritting her teeth.
"Don't call me that," I whispered, angry now.
"Why not….." Another contraction hit her. "Is….. that what he….used to call…..you? Bea?" A single tear dripped down my cheek. I wiped the tear away, there was no point crying. It wouldn't get rid of the past; it wouldn't excuse what we did to each other.
"You ripped my family apart," Francine managed to say. "You may as well have killed him Bea, and I haven't seen him for five years. He won't ever forgive Tony…."
"Stop,"
"He should never forgive you… either. Out of everyone you had too chose his brother. You had to choose Tony" She continued regardless of my plea.
Jenny came in and I stood up. "Can't Jimmy come in?" Francine asked. She was scared; I'd know her long enough to realize that.
….
The day I met the Spencer family sits in my mind with clarity that none of my other memories have. I was thirteen years old, and my house at the time had been on the edge of a beach. It was so close that if you walked out of the backdoor, you were on sand. I've always liked the feeling of sand between my toes, and how a beach looks in the dark. It was dark the night I met them.
I had gone out of the backdoor, trying to find Bobby. He had gone out earlier to read on the sand. I could see the shadows of three boys splashing in the waves. I could tell instantly one was my brother, the other two I didn't recognise.
I watched them lark about in the water for a few seconds longer, a smile dancing on my face at their fun. I had just set off across the beach when a girl ran flat into me. We both fell to ground. It was then I heard her laughing. "You Bobby's sister?" She inquired, once we had returned to standing. We were watching the boys again.
"Yes, I'm Bobby's sister."
"He's nice." I nodded, then realised that she couldn't see me in dark.
"Yes. He's nice. Are they your brothers down there with him?"
"Yep. Ray and Tone." She evidently had better vision than I had; as she saw my eyebrows shoot up in confusion. "Raymond and Antony, Tony for short. Hence Ray and Tone."
"Of course."
"We've just moved in next door. The first thing the boys noticed was that the house opens up on the beach." I laughed.
"That was the first thing that Bobby noticed as well."
"How long have you lived here, then?"
"Three years."
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" She asked.
"Yes." It definitely was. "It's even more beautiful at sunset." I informed her. We watched the boys in silence, for a few seconds longer. We watched them tire of the waves and start to walk towards us. That was when I asked her what her name was.
"Francine. Francine Spencer."
And that was the first time I ever met the Spencer's – Francine, Raymond and Tony. I didn't know how my future would be so intertwined with theirs.
…..
It took quite a while but Francine Wilson had just given birth to a beautiful baby boy. Jenny had gone to congratulate Jimmy,
"You know, I still can't believe you did it. You seemed like such a nice girl." She said, using what little energy she had left to shrug. The words stung me, but I didn't let it show.
"I made a mistake,"
"You got what you deserved." She commented. Her words reminded of a poem I had read while at school;
Everyone makes mistakes,
Mine kept me awake,
Thinking about what I'd done,
I'd lie there for so long,
I tried to make it better,
I tried to write a letter,
But trying never did any good,
Even though I thought it should,
I could have left it all behind,
But you see, I declined,
You took my heart,
When you went for a new start,
And left me with a heart that was about to break,
But I guess that's what I get for my mistake,
….
I felt numb, sitting at the kitchen table in Nonnatus house. I refused to believe what Dr Turner was telling us. It was late, near midnight when he had arrived. He had that look on his face, we used to joke it was 'bad news' face. How right we had been. Jenny was occupying the seat next to me. We were both silent.
"I'm very sorry, but she lost too much blood, there was nothing you could've done. She wasn't meant to be one of our patients, you weren't to now she had Haemophilia." He said, sombrely. I hadn't felt so guilty, since I'd broken Raymond's heart. You see, I knew she had Haemophilia.
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