A/N: This is just for fun, a humorous take on Godric's mental breakdown that eventually led to True Blood's S2 events. I figure even a vampire going through a moral identity crisis would possibly have some pretty bizarre behaviors that went along with it over time… Why not indulge in the insanity?
I own nothing. I'm just playing!
*El Vampiro Loco*
The incident was a repeat of much the same thing that had happened many times over the years, one that Godric normally shrugged off with great aplomb.
Isabel, Godric, and Stan stood in their local Best Buy discussing the purchase of a new flatscreen television for their nest. It was certainly not Godric's idea as he had always preferred reading over the novelty of televised programming, but his nestmates insisted it should be a group decision since it would affect the aesthetics of the residence they all shared.
Particularly, Isabel insisted.
Stan didn't care who went. He just wanted to watch Texas A&M football in high definition.
As always, before investing in the purchase of anything, Godric had researched into the various models and specifics of all types of flatscreen televisions and arrived at the store equipped with vast knowledge and a great many questions for the sales person assisting them.
When the sales person mistakenly asked if Godric would be keeping the television in his room or if it would be shared with his parents in a living or family room, all three vampires became completely still until the eldest finally said, quite calmly, "I am not a child. I am a vampire."
The purchase was made, and they left the store, the incident seemingly forgotten.
A few nights later, Godric walked into the newly designated 'TV room', stood watching the screen long enough for Isabel to notice the "No. I was NOT born yesterday." t-shirt he was wearing then turned around and disappeared again.
She wrote it off as part of his recent mood swings and irritability, and said nothing.
After nine straight nights of Godric appearing in the same t-shirt, Isabel could take it no longer and confronted him, finding him in his study, once again reading.
He looked up as if quite curious to her reason for being there.
"Can I help you, Isabel?"
She felt a bit like a mother coming in to chastise him like this, but she had already decided it must be done.
"Godric, how long do you plan to wear that same shirt? That is disgusting!"
His expression seemed passively amused.
"It is not disgusting. I wash it every day."
With that, he picked his book up and continued reading like she was no longer in the room.
Isabel stormed out, muttering to herself quietly in Spanish about Godric apparently going crazy.
Three days later, Godric wandered into the TV room to find Isabel watching "Dancing With the Stars", no longer wearing that same t-shirt.
This shirt stated in bold lettering: Don't Annoy The Crazy Person.
A/N: Please review! I have several more ideas for Godric's phase of sarcastic t-shirt insanity that is about to make Isabel lose it too! If you have any ideas, please share!
BTW, if you didn't already know, "el vampire loco" is Spanish for "the crazy vampire".