Well here it is…the much
awaited second part of 'Twisted Love'
But I must say,
this is rather hard to do, considering my current situation…
Picture this;
My computer is
on a very low coffee table…I can't afford a bigger one.
I am sitting on
my inflatable chair, in order to type. Unfortunately, my grandmother's Siamese cat has punctured said chair, so
it deflates as I sit here.
Needless to say,
I am experiencing extreme frustration, and back pains.
WHY?!
Oh well…
At least I have
my health!
~ Wannon-chan
pauses to cough and splutter ~
Nuts…
But I digress…on
with the fanfic! Yay!!
~ Wannon-chan ~
Twisted Love- Part Two
Seifer trudged back to his room, ignoring all the hateful glares he was receiving.
He was too wrapped up in his thoughts.
In fact, he was so absorbed in thought, that he forgot to be angry at Squall…for a little while, anyway.
"Baby! There you are!" Squall cried, walking towards him. Seifer's head shot up at his voice.
"Squall…he's…he's gone, and he never said goodbye…he hates me, and…it's all your fault!" he yelled. Squall quickly dragged Seifer into his room, which was thankfully very close.
"Shh! Don't make such a commotion!" Squall hissed. Seifer turned and lunged at him, tackling him to the floor.
"This is all your fault, you son of a bitch! You ruined my happiness, Zell's happiness…now I'm gonna ruin yours!" Seifer snapped, emphasizing each sentence with a punch. He dared to look at Squall's face, and saw that his eyes were filled with anger.
Seifer paused for a second, giving Squall time to connect with a punch of his own, and the two engaged in battle, oblivious to anything else around them.
All they knew was they were fighting once again.
No friendliness.
No smiles.
No happiness.
Just rage…
Eventually, the two broke apart, breathing heavily, and eyeballing each other.
"Why did you have to do this, Squall? You could have told me so much sooner…before Zell and I happened. Why do you have to destroy everything I build for myself?" Seifer asked, gasping for breath. Squall sneered.
"I could ask you the same thing…" he said. Seifer looked confused.
"What?" he asked. Squall frowned.
"Don't act so naïve Seifer…you know what I'm talking about. Remember back a few years…to that night…you remember, don't you? How you crushed my self confidence?" he asked. Seifer felt his stomach twist as he remembered.
"I…I'm sorry…" he said. Squall nodded solemnly.
"I'm sure you are…Why didn't you tell ME sooner, huh? I mean, I'm pretty sure you must have figured out that I wasn't exactly straight by the way I threw myself at you that night, and you shoved me away. That made me withdraw even further into my shell. I closed myself off to everyone, promising to never reveal my feelings again, for fear of being hurt. But I still loved you, regardless of what you did…that's real love, Seifer. Where you'll go to the ends of the earth for someone, without a single thought of your own safety…" Squall confessed.
"I thought you withdrew because of Sis leaving…" Seifer said, mainly to himself. Squall shrugged.
"That was part of the problem…her absence made me grow used to being alone, not to withhold my feelings…" he said.
"I thought you weren't into guys, until I heard about you and Zell…that's what hurt me the most. You never told me…"
"So you decided to have your revenge by screwing with our lives?!" Seifer snapped. Any sympathy he had been developing for the other teen had quickly evaporated. Squall shook his head.
"Not exactly. I'll admit that that was part of the plan…but mainly, it was to get you to be mine…I love you. Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to say that to you after what you did?! Yet I continue to say it…" he said with a sigh.
"…Like you're trying to convince yourself that it's true, Squall. I'd have to say that if you really did love me, that it's a twisted kind of love…an obsession, or infatuation. Not true love" Seifer snapped. Squall looked shocked.
"Wh-what? Am I…really doing that? No, it's true…I love you, I know I do…I don't have to convince myself! It's true!" he said. Seifer raised an eyebrow.
"Then why are you trying to convince yourself now? Face it, Squall…you've deluded yourself into loving me…but in reality, you don't." he said. "Anyway, I thought you and Rinoa were together…"
"Rinoa?! No, she was a control freak…she convinced herself that I could love her…oh no…" Squall trailed off. Seifer nodded knowingly.
"Kind of similar to you, don't you think?" he said smugly. Squall was in shock.
"I've…I've become just like that witch! Oh, god…" he gasped, flinging himself into Seifer's arms. "I'm so sorry…I've ruined everything! I hate myself so much…" he cried uncharacteristically. Seifer patted his back, emotions conflicting.
I don't know what to do…I'm still mad at him, but he's seriously sorry…and he's a friend. He needs this support…I guess I could put the anger aside, for now… Seifer thought. He wrapped his arms around Squall, as he began to cry remorseful tears.
I just hope Zell can forgive me…both Squall and Seifer thought.
~ * ~
Zell stormed into the cockpit of the Ragnarok, and stood there, fuming silently. Quistis noticed her good friend's upset expression, and walked over to him.
"Zell?" she asked quietly. The small teen's head shot up in surprise.
"Quistis, hi!…'Sup?" he asked nonchalantly. The willowy blonde sighed, shaking her head.
"Quit hiding, Zell…I know you're upset about something. Tell me…" she said. Zell's features scrunched up in frustration.
She already hates Seifer's guts…if I tell
her what happened, she'll hate him more…but I need to tell someone! He thought.
"It's Seifer…"
he began. Quistis frowned angrily.
"What has he
done to you?!" she demanded. Zell was
unsure if he should continue, but knew he would end up being pressured into it
anyway. Sometimes Quistis thought she
was doing the right thing, but she usually ended up making the problem worse.
"He…I caught
him cheating on me…with Squall…" he said. Quistis raised an eyebrow.
"Are you sure?
That doesn't sound like Squall…now Seifer, on the other hand…sorry, Zell. I won't say anything more." She said
seriously.
"Yeah,
Quistis…I'm sure that's what I saw. Squall was hugging him…and he was only wearing his boxers…" he said,
frowning at the picture of the incident burned in his mind. Quistis closed her eyes, digesting the
information.
"I'm so sorry,
Zell…it must have been terrible for you…" she said sadly. Zell snorted.
"Yeah…I'm just
so angry with him right now!…he told me he loved me, Quisty…" he said. Quistis' expression went quickly to one of
surprise.
"He did?!" she
exclaimed. Zell nodded.
"Uh-huh" he
said sadly, tears beginning to form. Quistis hugged him tightly.
"Oh, Zell…you
love him too, don't you?" she asked quietly, as Zell cried softly on her
shoulder. He nodded, and Quistis felt
her overwhelming sisterly instincts kick in again.
I swear…I'll make sure Seifer pays for
this! I've never seen Zell so upset before…poor thing… she thought.
Quistis
continued to hold and comfort her long-time friend, when the feeling of the
Ragnarok landing pulled them away from each other. They looked into each other's eyes, mouths set in a grim
smile. They knew it would be dangerous,
but they also loved the thrill of battle.
"We're here!"
Selphie announced.
"OHHH YEAHHH!
LET'S KICK SOME ASS!" Zell yelled.
"WOO-HOO!"
Selphie added. Irvine sighed.
"Isn't she
great?" he asked Quistis, who simply giggled in reply.
Maybe I can forget about Seifer for a
while, and enjoy myself…Zell
thought.
~ * ~
Squall left
Seifer's room, feeling stupid. They
were on uneasy terms…Seifer couldn't bring himself to forgive Squall just yet,
and Squall didn't blame him.
How could I do this?…oh, Zell…I'm such a
lousy friend…he thought. He caught sight of Nida watching him from
down the corridor, and felt a blush rise to his cheeks.
Why is he always watching me?…those warm
brown eyes of his…they never leave me alone…he thought, as he smiled at the other boy.
"Hi Squall…how
are you?" Nida asked as Squall neared him.
"Uh…hello,
Nida…I…I'm okay" Squall stuttered. Nida
smiled warmly.
"No, you're
not…something is troubling you, my friend…" he said knowingly.
How the hell did he know?! And why can't
I talk normally around him?
Squall mused.
"…H-how did you
know?" Squall queried. Nida's eyes
twinkled with his smile, and Squall had to stop himself from gasping at the
sight.
His eyes look really nice when he smiles…huh? What am I thinking?!
"Well, your
posture is suggesting something is wrong, and your eyes told the rest…" Nida
explained. Squall blushed.
He can read me too well…that thought
should make me feel uncomfortable, but somehow…it doesn't…he thought.
"Oh…" was all
Squall could manage. Nida put his hand
on Squall's shoulder, and gave him a concerned look.
"Do you need to
talk about it?…I know you're not exactly the best at discussing your feelings,
but…I will listen" he said. Squall felt
the warmth of Nida's hand seeping into his bones, erasing the cold darkness
that was previously there.
Could…could I be attracted to Nida? Squall thought incredulously. He looked deep into the other SeeD's eyes,
and realised that the answer was yes.
Since when?!…I don't understand this! He thought, noticing that Nida's hand was
still on his shoulder. He raised a dark
eyebrow, and it was Nida's turn to blush.
"…Sorry…" he
mumbled, taking his hand back. Squall
smiled (shock, horror!) and shook his head.
"Don't be. You know, I think I do need to talk…" he
said, putting that beautiful smile back onto Nida's face.
"Really?
Anywhere specific you would like to go to talk?" he asked. Squall thought about this for a moment.
"My room?" he
asked, watching for a reaction. Nida
blushed slightly, but smiled.
"Sure…" he said
shyly.
"I can't thank
you enough, Nida…" Squall said softly, and Nida's hand once again found it's
way to Squall's shoulder…not that he really minded.
"Please…don't
feel like it's a favour. I'm doing this
because I want to help you" he said. Squall nodded, smiling.
"Okay…thanks,
Nida"
"No
problem…let's go" he said.
I made a bad mistake. I wasn't in love with Seifer…I hope he can
forgive me someday…I'll miss his friendship…Squall thought, as he and Nida walked side-by-side
down the hallway.
~ * ~
The quartet of
fighters burst out from the Ragnarok, scanning for any Hexadragons…technically,
those were the only monsters they were supposed to kill, unless it was
unavoidable.
"Bingo!" Irvine
cried, pointing over to the left.
"CHAAARRGE!"
Zell cried, and they ran towards the very puzzled Hexadragon, swinging weapons
and looking threatening.
"Woo-hoo!"
Selphie whooped, as they began to battle every Hexadragon they came across.
"How many are
we supposed to kill again?" Zell asked, when they had stopped for a break. Quistis looked at him, after cleaning the
blade on the end of her whip.
"About fifty…I
think" she said. Selphie nodded.
"Yep, fifty! I
remember Squall saying so!" she cried.
"Well, here
comes number thirty-five!" Irvine yelped, pointing in front of them. A Hexadragon was charging straight for them,
angry as hell.
"Ahhh!" Selphie
screamed, casting Stop on the monster. Zell cast Triple on himself, then Aura on everyone else. Quistis used Gatling Gun, Zell used Duel,
finishing off with My Final Heaven. The
Hexadragon was dead. Zell wiped the
irritating beads of sweat from his brow, and let out a sigh. This was letting him release all his anger,
and he was feeling a little better. Quistis smiled at her friend.
I'm glad he's cheered up a bit…looks like
he needed to release some of his energy…she thought.
They battled
for a few more hours, until they had killed fifty Hexadragons. Zell collapsed on the grass, panting
heavily.
"Hoo-boy…that
sure took a lot out of me!" he said cheerfully. Selphie giggled.
"Come on, Zell!
Let's go eat! To the Ragnarok!" she cried, pointing to the large dragon-shaped
ship. Zell's stomach clenched painfully
at the mention of food, growling loudly. He grinned.
"OHHH YEAHHH!
I'm starving!" he yelled, staggering to his feet and glancing at the distance
he had to walk.
"Oh, man! Why'd
we have to walk so far away?! I'm too tired to walk that far!" he
complained. Everyone else was way ahead
of him. He sighed, and began walking
rather painfully back to the airship. His muscles were worn out from all the fighting he'd done.
As he was
slowly walking, he heard a roar from behind him.
Uh-oh…that doesn't sound good…he thought, as he spun around slowly and
saw a Ruby Dragon approaching.
"SHIT!!" Zell
screamed. He wasn't exactly prepared to
fight this monster…it had a very powerful Breath attack, and Zell wasn't
fire-resistant.
Despite the
protests of his aching muscles, Zell began to run, quite literally, for his
life. He saw the three people in front
of him staring wide-eyed in shock at him.
"RUN, ZELL!!"
Selphie screamed hysterically. They
drew their weapons, and began to run towards him, prepared for battle. They stopped suddenly when they saw
something that they were dreading…
The Ruby Dragon
was using a Breath attack.
"ZELL, NO!!"
Quistis screamed, feeling tears spring to her eyes. Zell was lying motionless on the grass. She felt anger seep through her veins, and began to run towards
the dragon once more. Irvine and
Selphie joined in the chase.
The Ruby Dragon
roared triumphantly, even as Selphie was summoning Eden.
It wasn't
enough. The Ruby Dragon still stood.
Irvine cast
Aura on himself, and used his Pulse ammo to blast away at the Dragon, which
finally fell and died.
Quistis was
already at Zell's side.
He wasn't
breathing…
"Here! Use this
Phoenix Down!" Irvine cried, kneeling by Zell's side. Quistis grabbed it, placing on Zell's body. Nothing happened.
Selphie shook
her head.
"He's gone,
Irvine…he's gone…" she said sadly, her voice catching. She began to sob loudly, and Irvine wrapped
his arms around her, letting his own tears of mourning fall into his
girlfriend's hair.
Quistis was
silent.
She simply sat
there, holding Zell's limp hand in her own, staring at his face. She wished that he would open his eyes, and
flash that horribly enchanting grin at her. Or that this was a dream…and she was about to wake.
But it wasn't a
dream. And Zell wouldn't open his eyes,
or smile ever again.
Zell was
gone…and Quistis finally realised it.
She began to
cry, her heart feeling like it was in pieces.
My friend…Zell…you're gone, you're really
gone…she thought, as the
painful sobs wracked her slender body. She buried her face in his cooling chest, and cried. She felt someone hugging her, and looked up
to see her best friend.
"Selphie…he's
gone…I…I never got to say goodbye…" she sniffled, hugging Selphie tightly. The other girl was too upset to even talk,
and just hugged Quistis.
Irvine picked
up the fallen body, and they made their way back to the Ragnarok in silence.
~ * ~
Seifer waited
excitedly for the Ragnarok to land. He
had missed Zell terribly, even though they had only been apart for a day.
Finally the red
ship had landed, and Seifer strode purposefully to it, waiting to see his
smiling, beautiful boyfriend once more.
The first
person out was Quistis. She fixed
Seifer with a glare even more venomous than the usual, before slapping him
soundly on the cheek.
"Zell told me
what you did, Seifer…and now he's…" Quistis trailed off, unable to say it. She turned quickly and ran off, leaving a
puzzled Seifer standing there, a hand on his stinging cheek. He looked at Selphie and Irvine, who had
just stepped out.
"Where's Zell?"
he asked of them. They looked at each
other sadly, and then turned their gaze to him. Seifer felt his heart drop.
"No…" he
whispered. Selphie's eyes filled with
tears.
"Uh-huh…he's
dead, Seifer…" she whispered. A harsh
sob broke through from Seifer mouth, and he fell to his knees, crying
unashamedly. Selphie put aside all
prior hatred she had for him, and knelt down, hugging him gently.
"I'm sorry,
Seifer…We all miss him terribly…he's…in there, if you want to see him, and say
goodbye before the funeral…" she said quietly. Seifer looked at her, eyes filled with pain.
"Thankyou,
Selphie…" he said. She smiled sadly,
and let him get up. Seifer felt a hand on
his shoulder, and looked behind him to see Irvine, his face twisted with grief.
"Seifer…I'm
sorry" he said, and Seifer nodded. The
two men hugged briefly, before Selphie and Irvine left together, leaving Seifer
alone again.
He entered the
Ragnarok, and gasped.
Zell lay there,
a peaceful look upon his face. Seifer
rushed to his side, touching his cheek.
It was cold.
Seifer began to
cry again, nuzzling into the chest of his beloved.
Zell…I never got to explain to you, I
never got to say goodbye…why? Why did you leave me? I'll be forever lonely
without you…he thought, as he
stroked the outrageous hair of Zell's…he'd always loved his hair.
He sat there,
simply absorbing the feel of Zell for a while, his sobs residing, turning into
anger and hatred. Anger for the fact
that he never got to say goodbye. Hatred for Squall, who caused this whole mess.
Seifer felt his
hatred for Squall reach bursting point. He stood, kissing Zell's cold cheek, before running to Squall's room,
kicking the door open. He took in the
scene before him. Squall and Nida
locked in an embrace, Squall crying into the other SeeD's chest. Seifer grew angrier at this sight. He knew Nida was a good person, and he didn't
want him being anywhere near that…thing.
He stalked over
to Squall, and punched him square in the jaw. The younger boy collapsed onto the floor, a hurt and puzzled look on his
face.
"Hey! What do
you think you're doing?!" Nida snapped, helping Squall to his feet, and
observing his face. Seifer ignored
Nida, and looked Squall directly in the eyes, and punched him again. Hard.
"Stop it,
Seifer! Leave him alone!" Nida cried.
"He's dead,
Squall. He's dead, and he died thinking
that I was cheating on him! I never got to explain, I never got to say
goodbye!…whose fault is that?!" Seifer cried. Squall's eyes widened, and he hung his head.
"Mine…it's my
fault…it's all my fault…" he sobbed. "Zell…I'm sorry…I can't believe you're really gone…" he said to
himself. Nida hugged Squall, whispering
comforting words. He paused and looked
at Seifer.
"Seifer…I'm
sorry to hear of your loss, but Squall's not doing so good…he feels really
sorry for what he did…he needs to just be comforted right now. Zell was his friend, too…" Nida whispered. Seifer nodded. He understood…but he could never forgive Squall. Never.
"Nida, I know
you're a gentle-hearted kind of person. All I want to say is be careful…don't trust Squall too easily" he said
coldly. Nida's eyes showed how hurt he
was by that statement.
"I think I can
trust myself to make the right decisions, Seifer" he snapped. Seifer was taken aback by the fierceness Nida
was showing.
"Fine." he
said, and left quickly to avoid hitting Nida too, tears beginning to pool in
his eyes again.
He went into
Zell's room, curled up on the bed and wept.
He fell asleep
soon after the tears stopped.
~ * ~
Morning came,
and Seifer was still in Zell's room. There was a knock on the door, and upon opening it, he saw Fujin and
Raijin, holding flowers.
"Hi, Seifer…"
Fujin said softly, handing him the flowers, and hugging him gently. Seifer looked at the both of them, a puzzled
look on his face.
"Hi guys…where
have you been?" he asked. They smiled
briefly, the smile quickly dropping back into a frown.
"We were on
vacation, ya know?" Raijin said. Fujin
nodded.
"Yes, but we
came back last night. Squall told us
about Zell, and we immediately thought of you…how are you holding up, Seifer?"
Fujin asked, as they all entered Zell's room and sat down. Seifer sighed, pushing the threatening tears
back.
"I'm…I'm doing
all right, Fujin, considering…" he said. Fujin nodded understandingly. Raijin looked at Seifer sadly.
"We just wanted
to help you out a little, ya know? Make sure you were okay, say hi, give
condolences…all those kinda things, ya know?" Raijin said, scratching his head. Fujin elbowed him hard in the ribs.
"IDIOT" she
commented. "Sorry, Seifer…Raijin's not
very good at this kind of thing. Neither am I, but I still know when to shut my mouth…ya know?" she
said, shooting a scalding glare at Raijin. Seifer smiled.
"Well, it was
nice to see you guys again…we're still a posse, right?" he asked. Fujin smiled, placing her hand on Seifer's.
"Always. We're always a posse…"she said. She shot another glare at Raijin, and the
two got up.
"If ya need
anything, just ask us, ya know? We'd be happy to help!" Raijin offered as they
exited the room. Seifer waved.
"I will, and
thankyou…" he replied, before snuggling back onto Zell's bed.
The covers on
the bed still smelled of Zell, and Seifer breathed the scent in deeply, wanting
to remember it.
He looked
around Zell's room, scanning every inch of it. His eyes settled on a picture in a photo frame.
It was of him
and Zell…smiling happily. Seifer sighed
sadly, tears re-appearing.
I miss you so much, Zell…I miss your
smile, your kiss…your infatuation with hot dogs…he thought, snickering slightly at the memory of Zell
choking on a hot dog.
But still…you're gone. I don't know how I'll cope without you, I'm
all alone for real now…
Seifer felt
terrible. He decided to sleep until the
funeral.
~ * ~
Seifer gave the
eulogy for Zell's funeral no more than an hour later. He was tired, listless and just wanted it all to end. He couldn't even walk two steps without someone
blaming him for Zell's passing. It was
too much. He couldn't take it any more.
"It's your
fault he's dead, Seifer! If you hadn't seduced him he'd still be alive!" a
nameless voice cried.
Your fault, your fault…all your fault…the voices sang in his head. They wouldn't even leave him in peace when
he was trying to say his last good-byes to his beloved. They rang out stronger, mocking him, tearing
him apart. Even Zell's voice appeared
in the midst of the others, cursing him, renouncing his love. Seifer felt his heart tear into pieces, as
he once more looked upon the still, lifeless form of Zell. He seemed so peaceful, but his spirit was
restless…
And it's all your fault, you worthless
piece of trash! Your fault! The
voices screamed again. It sent Seifer
over the edge. He let down his walls,
sobbing hysterically, before kneeling in front of the coffin, clawing at his
head. He felt someone's arms around
him, and saw Selphie's face come into view. She helped him to his feet, wiped away his tears and sighed.
"Seifer…this is
too hard for you, I can tell" she said. All childishness she once held on to was gone, a matured woman
replacing it. Seifer hugged her,
letting out his grief.
"They're yelling at me, Selphie…my fault…my
fault…" he whispered. Selphie rubbed his back.
"Shh, we should go…you won't find any
comfort here…" she whispered
back. They broke the hug, and Seifer
nodded.
"You're
right. Let's go." He replied, casting a
harsh glare at the assembled Garden members. Quistis looked guiltily at him, mouthing the words 'I'm sorry' over the
voices. Seifer's eyes widened, but he
nodded in acceptance, as Selphie grabbed onto his arm, and Irvine's, leading them
out of the service.
They returned
to the Garden.
Seifer decided
he would leave the Garden, and go to live in Dollet, where Fujin had an
apartment. But he wanted one more
chance to see Zell's room before he left.
He entered the
room, taking the picture of them together, before anyone else destroyed
it. He looked at the ceiling, a sad
smile on his face, before he began to talk.
"I still owe
you an explanation…there was nothing going on between Squall and I, I promise
you. Squall thought he was in love with
me, and tried everything to make me feel the same. Unfortunately, you walked in on one of his attempts. I don't love him, I never have, and I never
will. I love you, Zell…I hope you're
happy, wherever you are…I'll never forget you" Seifer whispered, feeling a huge
amount of guilt lift from his shoulders.
And from
somewhere above, Zell smiled.
I should have trusted you, Seifer…I'm
sorry. I love you…
The End.
Well, there's the end. Sorry if
it was really corny or crappy.
I hope at least you have the decency to tell me what would have made it
better.
After all, this is only my second attempt at a FFVIII fic. The first being 'Hot Dogs and a Mischievous
Imp'
Hope you liked it…review!
~ Wannon-chan ~