Because I'm having a hard time getting through a particular point in a story, or had a random funny situation pop in my head, these are various one-shots. Stuff that would normally never see the light of day (or leave my hard drive) until now. Beware, they are typo-ridden, fluffed up and mostly OOC.

Disclaimer: This disclaimer is srs bsns. If I really was Stephenie Meyer, would I be writing fanfiction on this website? I think not.

Edward, Charlie - Banned

I gently pried Bella's warm little fingers away from my shirt. I was still both in exhilartion and shock. Bella was alive and she had came for me. She saved me that day from making the worst mistake of my existence. In my defense, I had no idea she was even alive. How was I supposed to react to what Rosalie said about her?

Ah, Rosalie. My... sister. As old as I was, mentally, sibling rivalry didn't even cover the anger I felt toward her right now. But I promised Esme I'd cool off before speaking to her. Or letting Bella talk to her for that matter. The time in the car ride home didn't count. She was half-asleep.

I brushed a loose lock of hair from Bella's face and planted a soft, quick kiss on her forehead. My lips lingered, inhaling her beautiful scent. I pulled the afghan from the edge of her bed and drapped it over her, tucking her in. I would do everything in my power to make sure she was safe. And I would never leave her side.

That is, if she would have me back. If she had healed, as I had hoped she would.

I rankled when I heard a loud harumph behind me. Of course, Charlie was still downstairs. He was letting me know he was still downstairs, too. I turned to leave her bedroom, closing her door before making my way to the stairs. He stood below, watching the open hallway. He looked straight into my eyes before nodding. Although I couldn't make out exactly what he was thinking, I could understand that much body language. He had a few words for me.

I walked cautiously down, not entirely sure what he would say to me. I could only guess from the tenor of his mental voice. Anger was the predominant emotion.

He directed me to the couch, while reached around, removing the firearm from his belt, placing it squarely on the side table. He then sat in his chair, his eyes murderously furious.

"Before you say anything, I want to get something straight with you," he said, his voice gruff. I knew I was in for it. This was Bella's father and I knew he had every right to be angry with me, the boy who had left his daughter in pieces.

"You left my daughter months ago. You didn't call her, write her or do one damn thing to contact her. Now do you think you can just come running back into her life without paying the consequences, Edward?" Charlie played a scene in his mind of the opportunity of shooting me. Nothing fatal, of course. Just severely damaging.

As much as Charlie hurting me was laughable, I worked hard to hide that amusement. There were consequences that I had to deal with now that I was back here. Or at least, if Bella allowed me back. Charlie eyed me curiously, waiting for my response.

"No sir. I take full responsibility for my actions toward your daughter. I never meant any harm to her, ever. It was," I paused, trying to somewhat be truthful to Bella's father. "a misunderstanding. Entirely."

He rolled his eyes at me then. "Misunderstanding! How can leaving a girl in the woods alone ever be a misunderstanding? I thought I had your whole family pegged. You were such good kids, not a speck of trouble out of you."

I shifted in my seat, dipping my head in shame.

"Then you do this! Now, this may fly with other parents but will not damn well fly with me, boy. Do you hear me?" Charlie's glare pierced me. I deserved this. Every bit of it. I would take my verbal thrashing from Chief Swan and take it a like a man.

I nodded my head, acknowledging that I understood him.

Charlie's hands slid over the armrests of the chair. His left glided to the firearm, which I could see was still set on safety. He cleared his throat. He wasn't finished yet.

"Now I am grateful to your father for helping to bring my daughter back safe and sound, but I am banning you from this house. Do you understand me, son? Not one toe on this premise!"

I looked up at him in my guilt. He stared into my eyes and I could swear that he knew something. Could see something in me I hadn't seen before. A hole in my plan, as it were.

"And if I ever catch you with my daughter again, I will invoke my full authority as an officer of the law on you. And I won't hesitate to call your parents, good as they are to this town. You wouldn't want to embarass them like that."

I nodded again. Yes, a full verbal thrashing from Bella's father is exactly what I needed.

Did I mention how much I loved Billy Burke as Charlie in the movie? He fit Charlie to a 'T'. Seriously. More fanfiction needs Charlie in it.