Smoke, rubble and filth covered the entire place. There was little wind to even blow away the suffocating air that arose. Sanji stirred, hearing voices near him. It sounded like they were cheering. He groaned and slowly stood up. Suddenly, everything that happened before he lost consciousness came back to him. All he could remember was how Zoro sacrificed himself for the rest of the crew. He had no idea what had happened. He did have an idea, sort of, but he was not really sure.
He immediately stood up and looked around him. He could see that Luffy, Robin, Chopper, Usopp, Robin, Franky, and Nami were having the fun time of their lives as they watched Luffy dance around as if nothing had happened to him. And as his eyes scanned the area, he found the three katanas without their owner.
What the fuck? Where the heck is that shitty swordsman?
He ran away from where he was and slipped away from the eyes of his crew mates. The faster he sees Zoro, the better.
It took only a few minutes before he found a broken swordsman in the middle of an isolated area. He saw Zoro covered in blood. Not only a speck or a handful, but it was like a bucket of blood was thrown onto the man, covering his white shirt and haramaki with the red substance.
He tried to stop the bubble of hurt that was trying to come up in his chest. When he reached Zoro, he asked, "What- what happened to Kuma? Or whatever or whoever he is?"
Silence answered him.
What happened Zoro? Why are you covered in blood? Please. Tell me.
He tried again. "Oi, Marimo, what happened to you?" He tried to make his voice as steady as he could but he was breaking. He didn't - couldn't understand what he was feeling at that certain moment but it didn't matter. At least, for now, it didn't. He'd deal with it later.
"Nothing." Zoro answered, his arms crossed on his chest, struggling to hold his stance.
[-]
His lungs were constricted as if a hand was clutching at his chest, gripping tight - slowly putting pressure on it until... Shit. He didn't know what he was really feeling. He was bothered, scared, and hurt. Yes, hurt. He knew that he could have at least helped the Marimo avoid the scars and blood that he received and lost during his battle with Kuma. But he didn't. Fuck. Zoro was being patched up by Chopper and here he was, smoking his second pack of cigarettes.
He ran his free hand through his hair as he stared at the empty hall, wondering what could have happened if he had helped Zoro. Sounds around them were getting lively but it did not matter to him at that moment.
Nothing mattered - would ever matter - to him until Zoro woke up. He could only think of was how he failed: failed to save the crew; to save Zoro from the strength of the Shichibukai.
He tried to forget about Zoro for a moment since he had two crews to feed. He went aboard Sunny and slipped into more comfortable clothes before he went to the galley. He distracted himself with creating food which always calmed him down.
As he waited for the food to get cooked, he went out and helped the others carry things that were needed for the feast that their rubbery captain wanted. Of course, being able to defeat Moriah and get their shadows back, it was a good time to celebrate. But he suddenly became melancholic. Zoro... He would not be able to drink his sake today; not be able to eat the food that he would be serving.
Fuck. This is just pretty fucked up. Why am I still thinking about that bastard?!
"SANJI! Food!" Luffy shouted.
"Quit your shouting. Get some cheese and that's all I can give you until the food's done."
Usopp goggled at his captain as the rubbery arms held two or more huge slices of cheese, "I don't understand. How can he stand up and eat merrily when he almost died!" He spoke softly, but Sanji could hear the sniper.
He's right. Whatever happened to Luffy that caused him to be energetic like this again is because of him.
Sanji almost dropped the pots and pans that he was carrying when Lola talked to him. He was too engrossed with his thoughts about Zoro and Luffy's changes that he didn't even see the girl pirate.
The conversation he had with the girl passed in a blur. He was only half listening to what she was saying, his eyes staring far away, but not to the extent that he was being rude. It was still a girl that he was talking to of course.
After some time, every one of them went back to check on the people that got hurt along the way. They fixed things up as well, getting ready for lunch.
Sanji looked around and saw that Zoro had been patched up well by Chopper. Good. Then he heard the others asking what had happened.
Two of the Rolling Pirates suddenly spoke, saying that they had seen what had happened to Zoro.
Hearing this, Sanji not so subtly dragged the pirates outside to talk to them without letting anyone listen to their story.
He sat down on a huge chunk of rubble and took a drag from his cigarette. "Tell me what happened. After I fainted."
As the pirates spoke to Sanji, he gave his cigarette long drags to soothe his entire system that was screaming to run back and take Zoro into the boys' cabin.
Damn that Marimo. Why did he have to hurt himself? He would have died in the process of saving them; of saving Luffy. But... God, he was strong. He's still alive and breathing. Though, in pieces.
After hearing what had happened, he asked the two pirates to keep their mouths shut. Or else he would shove their tongues with his foot down their stomachs.
His eyebrows twitched as he growled, low as a tiger, "Never tell this to Luffy or to anyone. You hear me? He didn't sacrifice himself just to be praised."
The pirates whimpered. They really wanted to tell the others of Zoro and his - or almost - sacrifice for the crew.
[-]
The feast was not unplanned. Sure, pirates loved the festivities, whatever the reason was. It was noisy and filled with vigor and happiness. Every pirate in the room gobbled up all the food in front of them.
Luffy and the others were enjoying the company of the other pirates, but he couldn't stay there. He couldn't smile genuinely and have fun while Zoro was laying down and being watched by Chopper and Nami.
He stirred the broth that he was making, checking to see whether it was already good enough to put the ingredients that he needed for the soup as he fought mentally with himself.
His conscience would kill him if he had fun. He wouldn't like it if Zoro enjoyed himself if their roles were reversed. Whoa, wait... Why the fuck did he not want the shithead to have fun if their roles were reversed?!
What did he care about the swordsman? Sure, he was his nakama. They fought together in battles and they even almost had the same wavelength. But they also fought with each other which geared him and gave him something to look forward to the next day.
Sanji's heart thumped loudly against his ribcage. Damn, he did look forward to their fights. He liked the way the Marimo riled him up. He was the best sparring partner in the entire crew.
Fuck, Marimo. Wake up already.
He paced around the galley as he thought. He already finished his cigarette and after lighting up another one, he heard a soft piece of music wafting in the air. Someone was playing the piano.
After double checking the broth, he decided to go back to the festivities and watch.
[-]
That night was unbearable. He could not sleep. He tossed and turned in his bunk only to finally decide to go to the infirmary to check on Chopper. Yes, he thought, I'm going to check on Chopper and not the moss-head. Fixing his slippers, he sneaked out of the boys' cabin and headed towards the infirmary.
Chopper had decided earlier that Zoro needed to be moved in order for him to take care of the swordsman properly without the fuss of their rubbery captain. Luffy tried to give Zoro a full keg of beer earlier to which he almost had a problem convincing their captain that Zoro couldn't drink yet. Luffy apparently thought that beer would serve as medicine to the swordsman.
Walking to the infirmary took him ages. Sanji was on autopilot and when he was already facing the door, his insides churned. What the hell is wrong with me?
Pushing through his resolve, he entered the infirmary, isopropyl alcohol, and other medicinal odors, bursting in his nose. It was suffocating to him, one of the reasons that he didn't want to stay there whenever Chopper treated him.
Shit. I feel such a creep!
The room was dark except for the little illumination from the moonlight coming from the small window in the corner. He could see the features of Zoro in the bed; half of his face was shadowed but Sanji could see the softness of it. Far from the injuries that he had suffered.
As he closed in on the moss-head, he could see that Zoro's eyes were open. Chopper's sleeping body hunched on the foot of the bed. Not wanting to get on the bad side of the swordsman, he turned around and was about to get out of the room when he heard a grunt.
"What are you doing here?" Zoro's voice was quiet and it lacked the menace that he was used to hearing.
Still not turning around, Sanji replied, "Just checking on Chopper."
"Huh," Zoro huffed. "You can take him with you. He needs sleep."
"So you can take off your bandages and pretend that nothing happened?" Sanji gritted his teeth. Anger welling inside him.
"You can stay with me if you want after sending Chopper to the cabin."
Zoro's voice was so little that he almost did not hear the swordsman.
Sanji turned around and looked at Zoro. "Why?"
He needed to know why. Whatever he wanted to know. Or whatever he wanted to hear from the moss-head. His heart was now like a bird trapped in its cage, jumping around.
Zoro didn't speak. The vagueness in his request was apparent. Sanji still didn't understand how the moss-head's brain worked, but he was not going to start a fight. Not tonight. Not yet.
He shuffled to his feet and went to Chopper. The small doctor was light and was easy to carry. As he shifted the doctor's body in his arms and shoulder, Sanji spoke in a hushed tone, "I'll be back."
Now that he did not have to pretend that he was checking in on Zoro, though he was still light-headed on Zoro's request, he felt much better. After all, he did not have to lie to himself that he was thinking about Chopper instead of the swordsman.
[-]
"Let's go back to my question, Marimo." Sanji said as he closed the door of the infirmary. His hands itched on wanting to light up a cigarette. The only place that he was not allowed to smoke was Chopper's infirmary. He did not want their doctor to piss his pants knowing that he smoked in there so, even though he wanted to, he didn't. "Why?"
Zoro laid still, his head facing the window looking at who knows where. "Why what?"
Sanji sat down on the foot of the bed where Chopper formerly slept, his eyes searching the swordsman. He'd start at the basics. He did not want to force Zoro to tell him what had happened between him and Kuma. "Why did you want me to stay here?"
His voice choked. He cleared his throat afterwards. He did not want to show any signs of weakness to the moss-head. "What happened out there is your business. I don't want to force you to tell me what happened. Well, not yet. For now, I want you to tell me why you're letting me stay here."
Zoro still kept silent. Sanji ran his hand through his hair. He was getting frustrated. He was used to the bickering and fighting with Zoro that he could not stand the silent treatment that he was receiving.
He was about to give up and just forget about the one-sided conversation that he was having with the wind when Zoro ended his silence. "I just want you to stay. Is there anything wrong with that?"
Sanji choked on his spit. What was wrong with the moss-head? "It's not wrong, Zoro. It's weird. I can't," he gestured at the two of them, "understand this. Us, talking without fighting or throwing anything."
He could see that Zoro was contemplating what he had said. Zoro shifted a bit. He was now looking at him. His eyes were boring into him that he wanted to run and never go back. He could not understand the meaning behind the look, but it was… something.
"Do you really hate me that much?"
Sanji's eyes widened with the suggestion. Did he hate the swordsman? No. In fact, he just admitted to himself that he enjoyed being with the Marimo. Did he want what they have at the moment? Yes and no. He did not want to get killed by Chopper if he ever cut Zoro's stitches with fighting, but he was still apprehensive with their status at the moment.
"No. But you're being creepy now," Sanji confessed.
oro laughed lacking mirth. "You're weirder, though. Look at those creepy swirls that you call eyebrows."
"Fuck you!" Sanji said, laughing inside. This was his Marimo. What? Wait! When did he ever own Zoro?
Silence once again fell before them. It wasn't stiff like earlier, but it still was awkward. Sanji looked at the half-moon that was peeking in the window and smiled. He never knew that silence with Zoro could be… a little romantic. Shit! Not romantic. Anything but that!
"Sanji."
He immediately turned to the swordsman. It was the first time that he heard his name from those lips that he really had to stop himself from jumping up and down from his giddiness. At least, he now knew that Zoro knew his name. "Hm?"
"What would you do if I told you that I like you?"
TBC