By the way, Pam is supposed to be Pamela the Psychic from season 4, and in this universe she is not blind.
Warnings: Tiny bit of profanity and some discussion of homophobia.
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Chapter Two
When Cas got to Pam's, Dean was already there, sitting in a booth in the back corner, the most private spot in the restaurant. He waved Cas over with a smile, and Cas thought yet again that Dean Winchester might be the most beautiful human being on the planet. His smile just lit up his whole face, and those eyes …
Careful, Novak, he chided himself. You haven't even had your first date, and you're already dangerously close to falling head over heels in love with the man. Have a little dignity, dammit.
When Dean saw Grace padding at Cas's side strapped into her yellow vest with the words Service Dog printed on it, Cas saw the question on the tip of the other man's tongue, and then he saw Dean bite it back.
"I'm not blind," Cas said as he slid into the seat across from Dean. Grace crawled under the table and put her head on Dean's knee by way of a greeting.
"I wasn't gonna ask," Dean said. He rubbed Grace's neck gently, and Cas found himself feeling jealous of his own dog.
"I know. That's why I'm going to explain. I sustained an injury to my inner ear when I was a child. It doesn't affect my hearing, but I get occasional bouts of vertigo and fainting spells. Grace is trained to catch me if I start to fall." It wasn't the whole truth, but the rest of it really wasn't a first date conversation.
Dean accepted the explanation with a nod and didn't pry any deeper.
At that moment Pam came over to take their order. "Usual for you, sugar?" she said to Cas.
"Yes, please. And —"
"A raw patty for the dog. I know. You're my favorite customer," she said to Grace. "I could do your order in my sleep."
The dog grinned up at her. Grace worshiped Pam, partly because Pam always smelled like food.
"And what'll it be for you, Deano?"
"I'll have a burger. Thanks, Pam."
"You got it."
"So you're a regular here," Dean said when Pam left them alone again.
"I was about to say the same to you," Cas chuckled. "How is it we've never been here at the same time?"
"How do you know we haven't?"
"Oh, I'm pretty sure I would have noticed you."
Dean blushed and made a noise somewhere between a laugh and a cough. "I, uh … I actually don't eat here very often, but Pam is an old friend. When I was growing up, she was kind of like a big sister to me."
"You've lived in Sioux Falls your whole life?" Cas asked, pleased with how easily the conversation was flowing. He'd been prepared to deal with some awkwardness after confessing his disability, but Dean genuinely didn't seem bothered by it.
"No. We came here when I was fourteen. Before that we moved around a lot." A shadow passed over Dean's face, and he abruptly said, "What about you? You from around here?"
"No. I grew up in Boston, but I left home at seventeen, and I've never been back. My family and I are not on speaking terms except for one brother who unfortunately lives in Europe. I don't see him much."
"Oh." There was a brief, slightly awkward silence, but Cas would have sworn the other man looked grateful. Cas had allowed the conversation to turn away from Dean's past and simultaneously hinted that he had secrets of his own and would probably understand when Dean felt ready to open up. "Was the gay thing a problem for them?" Dean asked after a moment.
"That was part of it, but I always knew they would take that badly. I told them before I left because I knew it would discourage them from looking for me. It wasn't the reason I left."
"Yeah, my dad wasn't too happy about it either, but that was the least of our problems. As far as he was concerned, I'd never done anything right." There was a slight edge of bitterness to Dean's voice, but mostly he just sounded sad.
Cas decided that it was time for a change of subject. "So you're a mechanic."
Dean brightened up immediately. "Yeah, not the most glamorous job, I know, but I love it. An engine is like a puzzle. You can't force it. You gotta be patient, and sometimes it's really frustrating, but then there's this moment when it all fits together, and everything just … works. It's a great feeling."
"Sounds a lot like sex."
Dean choked on his water. He was still coughing when Pam returned with their food. "You okay, hon?" she said, patting him on the back.
"Yeah," he managed to rasp, shooting Cas a look.
Cas just smiled back innocently, thinking that flushed and breathless was a good look on Dean Winchester even if he wasn't flushed and breathless for the right reasons.
They let the conversation lapse for a moment while they tucked into their food. Cas was well aware that he had a habit of making vaguely sexual noises when he bit into a good burger, and Pam's burgers were very good. Dean's pupils dilated with what was unmistakably lust when Cas let a muffled moan escape his full mouth. Cas met the other man's eyes, swallowed, and very deliberately licked the grease from his lips.
"You really like burgers, huh?" Dean said, his voice still a little hoarse, though probably for other reasons now.
"Oh, yeah. I'm a carnivore through and through. All kinds of meat."
Dean stared at him. The innuendo was obviously deliberate, and for a moment Cas was worried that it had come off as coarse or creepy. But then Dean put a fry in his mouth, his lips pursing around it in a very sensual manner, and said with his mouth still full, "Me too."
Cas was suddenly very tempted to break his firm no-sex-on-the-first-date rule.
Grace finished her plate of raw ground beef and began eyeing the humans' food covetously. Cas ignored her, but he also pretended not to notice Dean slipping her fries under the table.
"So what do you do?" Dean asked when the burgers were gone and they could talk like civilized people again.
"I own a gardening store," Cas said, "and I raise honeybees." He took a fry from Dean's plate since his own were gone. He didn't ask permission.
Dean's eyes followed the piece of potato all the way from the plate to Cas's mouth. He didn't complain. "Honeybees?" he said.
"Mmm. Honeybees are essential to the ecosystem. If they go extinct, humans won't be far behind. Plus, they're just fascinating creatures. No one tells the bee which flowers to pollinate, and yet its path is anything but random. There's an underlying structure to nature just like one of your engines, only far more complex. It's beyond human comprehension, and yet the bee, whose brain is smaller than the tip of a baby's pinky finger, understands it instinctively." He noticed a slightly glazed look in Dean's eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm boring you. I should have warned you that once you get me started on this subject, I can talk your ear off."
"No, it's fine," Dean started to say. "It's—" And then he was interrupted by a tinny electric guitar riff coming from his pocket. He pulled out his phone, and his eyes widened when he saw the screen. Cas could see the name of the caller — Sammy. "Oh, crap," Dean muttered under his breath. He answered the call, and instead of hello, he said, "Sorry, sorry, sorry."
Cas couldn't hear the other end of the conversation apart from an indistinct male voice. "Yeah, I got … distracted," Dean replied to whatever the man had said. "I can still get there. You don't have to take a cab. I'll be there in an hour. Just … go shop in the duty free. Buy something horrendously expensive, and I'll pay you back for it."
Cas did his best to hide his disappointment. It didn't sound like Dean was making this up, but obviously the evening wasn't going to end with ill advised first date sex.
"I'm sorry," Dean said, addressing Cas this time as he slipped his phone back into his pocket. "I forgot that I promised to pick my brother up from the airport. I'm not making this up to ditch you, I swear."
"It's okay," Cas reassured him. "I believe you. Can we pick this up another time? Because I was really enjoying your company."
Dean blushed. Cas loved how easy it was to make him do that. "Yeah, I'd like that. Here." He grabbed a napkin, fished a pen out of his pocket, and wrote down a phone number. Then he slid the napkin across the table together with a fifty dollar bill.
"Dean, that's too much," Cas protested. It would pay for both their meals and then some. He'd been planning to split the bill since he had no idea how much a mechanic made but he couldn't imagine it was a lot.
"Get dessert on me," Dean said, already standing up. "And tell Pam to keep the change. You can pay next time." He gave Grace a parting pat on the head, and then he was gone.
Grace put her head in Cas's lap and gazed up at him as if to say, I'm not going anywhere.
"Well, at least I won't be sleeping alone tonight," he muttered, scratching her behind the ears the way she liked. He wasn't sure if that was comforting or just more depressing. Grace was a wonderful companion and certainly more than just a pet. Sometimes it felt like she was a part of his soul. But he would much rather have Dean Winchester in his bed. Oh, well. Maybe next time. There had definitely been a spark. He hadn't imagined that.
He was transferring Dean's number from the napkin to his own phone when Pam came back. "Did he ditch you?" she said with a thunderous expression when she saw Dean's empty seat. "Oh, I'm going to kick his pretty little ass."
"That's not necessary," Cas assured her with a small smile. "He had a previous commitment that he had forgotten about. We're going to reschedule, and" — he held up the fifty — "he paid."
Pam's expression softened. "Always a gentleman, our Dean. Can I get you anything else? Dessert special's cherry pie."
"That sounds perfect. With ice cream?"
"For you, sugar? Of course." Pam started to turn away, but then she stopped and gave him a serious look. "Cas, maybe this is out of line, but I care about Dean a lot. He's like a little brother to me, and I know he comes off all cocky and self assured, but underneath all that he's really kind of fragile. And if you break him, you'll have a lot of people to answer to. A lot of people in this town love Dean Winchester, and if you're not planning to join the club, then you better get the fuck out of his life." Before he could do more than stare at her with his mouth open, she smiled sweetly and said, "Be right back with your pie."