Author's Rant: I really appreciate you guys. I hope you enjoy this next update ^_^

Preparations

Naruto didn't think it'd been smart in using his off day to prepare for Sasuke. He'd thought over and over again about his approach, the way he should respond and the skills the young folks used now and days to attract other. He'd gotten frustrated around six thirty in the morning after reading seventeen straight pages about wooing a potential partner in his daughter's magazine. It wasn't supposed to be this difficult. It would've been easier getting someone to fuck and leave.

But. . . Naruto didn't want it to end with a 'see ya later' this time. He wanted a morning after, some breakfast and then the discussion of where it went from there. With Sasuke, he wanted it to be different. Naruto sighed, flinging the sinful romance article to the other side of his dinner table and reached up to squeeze the nasal pressure between his eyes. This was too much. He remembered, once upon a time, when all his daddy had to do was bring home some flowers, a box of chocolates and a kiss to get his mama going.

The shit ain't the same in this day and age. Just look at this shit. "Fuckin' ridiculous," he grouched, snatching the magazine back. You have to take into consideration the person's emotions, the way he sits, if he turns to the right he's into you, if his eyebrows lift up he finds you strange and just—Naruto concentrated hard at that particular part, "How the hell they gonna know if a man's horny by studyin' his kneecaps? The fuck they get this shit?"

See? Too damn complicated.

And those were just the basics. That didn't even include preparing for the main event. You had to pick a specific color shirt, chose the right flowers, pick out candy, cologne, "Shit, we might as well get married."

Sakura entered the kitchen to hear the last bit of her father's words. She saw his face angled down into her magazine, chin perched on the back of his knuckles and a hard frown on his face, "You still readin' that Daddy?" She said, going to the refrigerator for eggs, turkey bacon and orange juice. "I recommend page 119."

Naruto lifted his head to respond, and chewed back his words after seeing Sakura's current school attire. He lowered the magazine, closed his eyes and counted to ten twice before saying, "Sakura."

"Yes Daddy?"

Naruto looked again to be absolutely sure of what he was looking at. Here was his fifteen year old daughter wearing a blinding lime green mid drift tank, some daisy duke shorts with a print of Mickey Mouse on the right pocket of her ass, a pair of striped neon pink, black and white, knee high socks, low top black Air Forces, and all of her long pink hair in a high ponytail to show the three black earrings in each ear. Naruto blinked and sat back stunned. Was he drunk the last time he allowed his daughter to go shopping?

He shook his head, "Sakura what are you wearin'?"

"What? Oh this? Jus' somethin' I found in the back of my closet."

"Well shit, where's the rest of it? In your room?"

"Daddddddy ugh," Sakura slapped a piece of butter in the skillet before cracking the eggs in with it. "Everyone's wearin' Punk now. Get with it. Why are you so old?"

Naruto looked offended, "I'm not old and you've lost your damn mind if ya think you're walking outta here like some dime store hoe. Go change."

"Why the hell I gotta change?!"

"Cause' my foot's gonna find a new place in your ass if you don't. Go change Sakura. Now!"

"Fine, cook your own breakfast!" Sakura smacked the spatula on the countertop, and stomped out of the kitchen grumbling.

"Whatcha' say?" Naruto shouted.

"Nothin'!"

"That's what I thought, badass lil' heifa'," The magazine reading would have to wait. Naruto went to take over the cooking of breakfast, making enough for himself and his children. The bacon was lift to sizzle in the pan and the eggs placed in a side plate while he went to knock on Sakura's door to hurry up and to go wake his son.

Getting this child to wake up for school was hell. Kyuubi Uzumaki was playful, adoring, sweet, and charming. But when it came to waking up from his beauty sleep, this boy took frustration to a whole new level.

Naruto opened the door to his son's room, a personal land of football, race cars and basketball, the overwhelming traditions of a toddler boy. Toy trucks and cars littered the red and white checkered carpet, installed by Naruto himself and crayon drawings were scattered everywhere. There was one drawing of Kyuubi feeding apples to a puppy and another of him, Sakura and Naruto holding hands under a green sun.

That's his boy. Imaginative as ever and sweet as can be. Naruto sat on the edge of Kyuubi's twin bed and lightly reached out to push back his head of long red hair. Just like his sister, he came out another surprise when he'd been dating Karui. Sakura had been around eleven at the time and instantly took to Karui. She and Naruto had a comfortable relationship, nothing to stressful, nothing too serious. She had her life together and they, in a way, fit. That and the fact Naruto had gone through a couple of years of having a crush on the dark skinned beauty. She had gorgeous long red hair and amber eyes like a feline that glowed when up to no good. Oh and what a firecracker she was in bed.

Naruto had had a world of fun with her until they'd realized that they suited each other better as friends. By then, it'd been too late. She'd called Naruto a couple of weeks later to confess she was pregnant. It hadn't mattered to him. Naruto planned to be there from start to finish, just like with Sakura. He was a done deal when he held his red haired son. As soon as he opened his bright blue eyes, that was all she wrote. Naruto didn't have a problem signing his name on the dotted line as the father of Kyuubi Kurama Uzumaki.

As he grew his skin darkened, his face angled more like his mother's and that hair refused to stop growing. But that smile, that bright sunny smile, yeah, that was all Naruto.

Karui had moved on with her life, one that couldn't include Kyuubi as often as she wanted. Being an inspiring dancer came with sacrifices, but she did what she could to check on her son, Sakura and Naruto's wellbeing whenever the chance was granted. At least Kyuubi knew his mother. That was enough for Naruto at least.

"Come on son, time ta' wake up." Naruto gave the boy a little shake and nudge on his feet. "Ya gotta eat and get ready for school."

"Hmm," Kyuubi flipped on his other side, burying his face against his pillow. "Noooo."

"Yes son, get up." Naruto turned his son around and lifted his shirt. Before Kyuubi knew what was going to happen, he woke with a shout and squeal. Naruto pressed his lips against his tummy and started blowing loud, squishy raspberries.

"No Daddy no! S-s'op it!" Kyuubi squealed again and again, smacking his palms against Naruto's head to shoo him away. "S'op it, s'op it! Quit it Daddy!"

"Nope, ya gonna wake up?"

"Daddy, quit it! I wakie, I wakie!"

Naruto showed mercy after one final blow and sat up. "Get up lil' man." Naruto stood, had barely gotten away from the bed when he heard a soft snore coming from his son. "Son of a gun," Naruto should've known that first attempt would fail. It always ended like this. He pushed off the blankets and picked up his son. Kyuubi tucked his face in his daddy's neck, sound asleep.

Naruto knocked on Sakura's door. "Sakura, you decent?"

"Yeah!"

Naruto went in, and felt better at this new outfit. A grey and yellow wide neck sweater, some torn blue jeans and a pair of white flip flips, "Can you get your brother ready for school?"

"Sure, he fell back asleep huh? Told ya you should've tickled him like you did me," Sakura whispered, easing Kyuubi from Naruto. "I'll get him ready. Is breakfast almost ready?"

Oh shit. Naruto nearly forgot. "Yeah, lemme go check." He tried not to sprint back when the smell of burnt bacon started breezing through the house. "Please don't be burnt, please don't be burnt." He chanted all the way down the hall, through the living room and into his kitchen.

Well.

Good news was he didn't find the food burnt. What he did find were two extra bodies, one at his dinner table and one at the stove, enhancing the size of breakfast for five instead of three. The thump in Naruto's chest relaxed. The father inside him was about to run back to his bedroom for his 9mm, but the best friend and godfather inside said to kill his family later.

"Damn, could'cha knock before helpin' yourselves in? You almost caught a bullet in your asses."

Naruto's partner at All American Homes Construction, drink buddy and best friend, turned bored red eyes in his direction. There he stood, tall, lanky as a popsicle stick, short gray hair and chewing a toothpick in the corner of his mouth. He was wearing a pair of dark blue jeans and a black t-shirt tucked in and some tube socks. Naruto had been friends with Hidan for nearly ten years, after the man helped him get a job at the construction company to support Sakura. Since then Naruto clung to the man like glue so he could learn as much as he could. Then there was the thing with Hidan having a child of his own from a previous marriage, the young man currently sitting at the kitchen table reading a novel.

Naruto knew the marriage between Hidan and Tsunade didn't stand a chance. The two were too wild and high stung. He remembered Hidan saying the only reason they lasted as long as they did was for the sex. Otherwise, it was a meltdown waiting to happen.

Hidan switched from the pan of eggs to the other cooking hot sausages and more bacon, "Ya outta be happy I came over here to visit, ya ungrateful asshole. Kakashi go get ya sister and brother ta' school 'fore I knock your teeth out!"

The eighteen year old took his precious time, leafing through three pages of his book before a hard look from Hidan had him standing and leaving. "Must you threaten me for every little order Dad? A simple go do it would suffice. Pop said you should cut me some slack."

Hidan held up a blade, "You still here?"

"No, I'm gone," Kakashi stood up, slow as a molasses and went towards the hall, lifting his head to Naruto before disappearing to Sakura's room.

Naruto couldn't stop the chuckle from coming, "Why ya givin' Kakashi such a hard time?"

"'Cause the lil' shit's got a boyfriend and he won't tell me who he is. I tried to have that talk wit' 'em ya know?" Hidan's frustrations were leaking out bit by bit and when this happened, he tended to go overboard with whatever project he was doing. Like now, not only were there going to be bacon, eggs, and hot sausages for breakfast, there were going to be Belgian Waffles, buttered toast and grits. "Guess what this lil' motherfucka did? Go on ask."

Naruto retook his seat at the table, folding his arms across the surface, "What'd he do?"

"He went and told Zabaza what I said!" Hidan flipped a couple of pancakes around in the frying pan, before dramatically waving around the spatula to tell his story. "He was pissed about me trying to teach my son how to use a condom, talkin' about how Kakashi was old enough to know how a dick worked or some shit. Well if the motherfucka knows how to fuck, then he knows how to get the fuck outta my house! Ain't paying a bill in there anyway."

"That's rough man."

"Tell me about it. All he does is eat, sleep, shit and go out all hours of the night. And does he offer to pay anything? Hell no," By now there was a bowl of oatmeal being poured in five separate bowls. "Ya know what Kakashi said to me? Said I was too old to know how to fuck. And I'm like, boy don't you know your scrawny ass was swimmin' around in my nut sack before you knew how to spell dick?! How the fuck you think you got here? The fuck outta here. I almost caught a case." At the end of his rant, Hidan set the table for five, five plates of hot delicious food, smoking wonderfully in the air. Naruto got up to fish out some orange juice and apple juice for Kyuubi.

Kyuubi came running down the hallway making air plane noises with his lips, twirling in circles and spinning and dropping and laughing. "Sakura, Kakashi, get your asses in here!" Hidan hollered.

The pair came out, Sakura rolling her eyes and Kakashi's face still buried in his book. Everyone sat down to have the southern style breakfast, making small talk and discussing a little bit of everything there was to talk about with school, work and other things. Most of the conversation Naruto and Hidan couldn't relate too when Sakura and Kakashi talked because it involved a lot of events at school. Kyuubi was too busy making a mess with the maple syrup.

After breakfast Sakura and Kyuubi kissed their father good bye and left so Kakashi could drive them all to school. Now alone Naruto could pinch the older man's ear for some advice. When it came to relationships, especially with men, Hidan knew enough to help. Especially since him and Zabaza had been married for nearly twelve years. Obviously they knew something about making their relationship work for this long.

"The fuck is this?" Hidan grabbed the Cosmopolitan Magazine from the corner of the table, where it was saved on Ten Ultimate Signs He's Into You. Hidan looked at the magazine, then at the younger blond, a little freaked out. "Now I know Sakura's pretty much a pussy kisser so this can't be for her. That either means Kyuubi's comin' out earlier or," Hidan read over it again. "You're learnin' that a man's into you when his what? His eyes twitchin'?" Hidan threw the magazine across the room like it revealed a strand of AIDS. "Hell naw that means he ain't got any business bein' outta a strait jacket. Why are you readin' that?"

Naruto wiped his hands over his face, "Sakura said it'd be an easy way to get back into the datin' game."

"What's there to know? You ask, you screw, they go home, the end."

"No, no, not this time around. I like this guy and I wanna have something different." Naruto sat back in his chair ready to let it all out. He retold the whole story about meeting Sasuke at the meeting to talk about Sakura, and how he practically told his daughter's whole history and even asked the guy out. Since yesterday all Naruto's done is think about the man's seductive smirk and the way he flirted right back with him. Those eyes were made for clouding up with lust. And that pale face? Just like an undisturbed bowl of milk. Naruto vaguely wondered what Sasuke's face would look like scrunched up when his spot was hit just right.

Damn he needed to get laid.

"So lemme get this right, you wanna date this man, yeah?" Hidan concluded after reading the entire story.

"Right."

"And ya think it's romantic to see his eyes twitch and, what else that thing said? Watch his knee caps buckle?"

Naruto dropped his head on the table, "I don't know what the hell I'm doin'."

"You sure as hell don't if ya gettin' turned on my knee caps and shit. Look, this is gonna sound like a corny ass line, but why don't you try bein' a lil' traditional. Ya know, candies, flowers, the whole nine." Hidan threw his thumb at the discarded magazine. "All that's gonna teach you is how to scare the man across town. He ain't gonna care about you starin' at his knee caps and thick eyebrows and whatever the hell was in there. Just be you."

"I don't know if being me is gonna cut it with this guy. You haven't seen him Hidan. He looks like crystal china. Skin smooth as silk, a face like a super star and damn he had an ass outta this world. I wanna settle down. I'm sick of playin' the game."

"Yeah, I know how that is," The forty five year old sunk down in his chair, rubbing under his nose. "I remember when I realized I was in love with Zabaza. It scared the hell outta me ya know? I thought I was sick 'cause my stomach kept hurting, my face got hot and all I thought about was his violent ass."

In love? What? No Naruto wouldn't call it that. Well not yet. It's just . . . when he saw Sasuke it was something to that effect. Maybe the explosions of fireworks, dynamite and flowers blooming . . . close enough.

Damn. "What happened when you told him?"

Hidan paused, and then chuckled, "Man, Zabaza kicked my ass. No, I'm serious. He beat the hell outta me for taking three years to say it to him but after that whew lord have mercy. Babe went all out. I couldn't walk, he couldn't walk. We just laid in bed and chilled. We had our dicks so far up—"

"Yeah, Hidan damn, TMI." Like he wanted to know how a couple of old men got down.

"Anyway, all I can say is be you. Your eyes were all shiny when you were talkin' about this guy you know? Like he did some voodoo on ya or something."

He might have. Because now, all Naruto did was think about Sasuke, what Sasuke was doing, where he was doing it, was he as nervous a Naruto was for this Saturday, would he want to continue the relationship on from there?

And what's crazy . . . Naruto never had this strong pull for there to be a after morning with any of his previous flings. With Sasuke, it was different. He wanted to wake up to see those sleep black eyes open, to see that tired smile, to feel his warm curled against his body.

"Shit," Naruto covered his face with his hands. "I'm done Hid'."

Hidan patted his friend's back, "It happens to the best of us, kid."

Why had he called them over again? Once of them was a block of ice with no eyebrows and red hair. And then there was the other one, nosily going through his belongings. The second one, Sasuke had to ask himself more than once why he'd called him over when all he'd done thus far is reject all of his ideas.

"How's this?" Sasuke emerged from his closet dunned in a pair of jet black dress pants and a cashmere cream sweater.

Gaara kept his eyes glued to the television watching the reruns of Matlock. That was the first obvious rejection. Now for the other. Sasuke turned in circle for his other, difficult-to-please friend and waited until his bright blue eyes came up from the fishing magazine he had stored in his dresser drawers.

Deidara tossed the magazine God knows whether and let his single visible eye look Sasuke over. As expected, an automatic snort blew from his lips, "You do know it's about eight five degrees outside? Unless this Naruto person's into heat casualties, hey, I say go for the gold. Heat stroke victims have been known to turn on the dead."

Ok strike five. Sasuke flipped the sweater off and into the pile with the rest of the discarded clothes. "A few ideas would be appreciated."

"Just as soon as you let me in your closet sport, we're in there." Deidara called from the bed.

Bad idea. Sasuke wouldn't mind allowing the wild blond access into his walk in closet. No really, he wouldn't mind at all. It's just when Deidara went through anyone's clothing, he had a tendency to believe everyone needed to go through the exact same fashion treads as him. This guy changed fashion more than a woman went through a pair of panty hoses. Today everyone was lucky to see the blond actually wearing a shirt AND some bottoms. Today he was decked in a sleeveless tiger print mid drift, some leopard patterned shorts and cobra print sandals.

Those poor animals hadn't stood a chance.

Sasuke remembered coming home to his own person Africa in his closet and the day after that, he might as well had gone blind from all the neon t-shirts and highlighter beach shorts for men and women.

No. No. Never again, "I'll pass." As much as a fashion tyrant Deidara was, he had the best fashion and dating advice next to Gaara's nonverbal honesty. Sasuke was going to need a little more than a nod or shake.

Sasuke pulled down another set of clothes, put them on and came out to display.

Gaara didn't bother to turn around, so this was also a no.

Deidara lifted his head from one of Sasuke's sock drawers and rolled his eyes, "Someone call the Fashion Police, Madonna's trying to go gangster. Serious meltdown Sasuke. If you walked out of wearing that, I'll never let you walk next to me again."

"Whatever," Sasuke grumbled. What exactly was wrong with what he was wearing? He tugged at is grey pin stripped vest and glanced around at his black dress pants. The long sleeve button up was a little much, but he didn't want to come off as too late in his age. Then there was the fact of getting his place ready.

For goodness sakes he lived in a single bedroom apartment with mostly dark colored furniture, onyx colored counters and tiles in the bathroom and kitchen, and black cabinets. So what was wrong with having mostly black surroundings? He found the color transfixing and dashing. The first time Deidara had saw it, he'd threatened to run to the paint store and pull a Wonder Woman on everything.

Sasuke's wardrobe was no different. Nearly everything was white, grey or, of course, black.

Well, except.

Sasuke went back inside his closet to change. Later, he came out in a powder blue V-neck shirt, some khaki cargo shorts, and sky blue sandals, all of it an outfit courtesy of his brother in law, a fashion psycho on the DL. Sasori had insisted he buy Sasuke an outfit for a trip to Disney World last year and came back with this. It was an outfit Sasuke hadn't minded wearing, except when he arrived, his older brother Itachi was wearing the exact same thing.

This time, Gaara looked away from the TV, actually muting the show to have a faceless stare at Sasuke's outfit. His eyes switched from side to side, up and down, than focused on Sasuke's face. Sasuke held his breath, "This one's good," Gaara said before going back to the television.

"Hm?" Deidara came back from the kitchen eating a bowl of green grapes and nearly dropped the bowl. "Well," he looked Sasuke up and down. "This is new. Yeah, seeing you out of the death scene works wonders. I like this. Turn around."

Sasuke did.

"Hold out your arms."

Sasuke did.

"I like it, not bad," Deidara thought circling Sasuke, poking him in certain places. "Lemme check something."

He turned Sasuke around, keeping the dark haired man oblivious to what was about to happen.

Deidara raised his hand and slapped his palm against Sasuke's butt, hard as hell too. Sasuke rose to the tip of his toes and scrambled away, horrified and violated.

Deidara opened and closed his palm, looking at the center like there was a written message inside.

"What the hell was that for?" Sasuke said.

"Well I had to see if those things kept your butt from the Jiggle Twitch."

"The jig-what?"

Deidara sighed, face palming, "The Jiggle Twitch. The Jiggle Twitch. If your pants aren't tight enough no one can see the bounce of your ass. Read Sasuke. It's in Cosmo Girl. No man wants an ass that doesn't move a little. How do you think I keep Neji coming home? It sure as hell ain't my home cooking! You should see him in the bedroom. You'd never guess with that face he was so bloody savage. I swear the man's a fucking animal. He loves to slap it, smack it, rub it, I mean damn. We might as well be making pancakes . . ."

Gaara turned off the TV, grabbed his keys, his wallet and left the bedroom.

Sasuke dropped on his bed and covered his face with his pillow, trying his hardest to drown out the rest of Deidara and Neji's freaky sex life.

There were only two days before the date and Sasuke was nowhere near ready. All he had was a mute friend, a sexual explosive blond friend, and no clue how to impress Naruto. This guy was a walking lust machine. Sasuke wanted so bad in that class room to pull that shirt off to see if the man was truly tanned all over and built like the shirt emphasized. He could imagine everything. The contrast of Naruto's darker skin against his pale skin, the way he might taste, the scent of his body beneath his, just, just damn he was flawless.

And a little older.

Sasuke had no idea how he was going to impress the single father nor how to keep the relationship flowing.

That part he wanted more than anything after meeting Naruto. Seeing him seemed to awaken that old side of Sasuke that figured he'd have to be the traditional man who had to marry a woman and have children that way. With Naruto, he came with the whole package.

Sasuke wanted more than a one night stand. It was strange, thinking about this man as often as he'd been doing since yesterday. Whenever Sasuke saw the sunshine, he immediately thought of how the heavens would be jealous of the natural brightness Naruto possessed. He was real, he was perfect, had a smile worth seeing every day and—damn Sasuke had it bad. What the hell could he do?

His cell phone—flip phone—started buzzing from the nightstand. Sasuke patted around until his fingers brushed against the little tool and pulled it around to eyeball the screen.

That's when it hit him like a ton of bricks. Why hadn't he thought it before? If you wanted to impress an older man, why not ask one?

The screen flashed Itachi Uchiha several more times before Sasuke opened the phone and answered with his first smile since yesterday.

TBC: Guys the pairing positions is in the summary. I'm NOT going to write it in every chapter when its out in plain view. That'd be redundant.