Chapter Two: Heard of the New Game Yet?

The fight was on.

Completely unexpected, Sonic and Tails had run into three Egg Pawns out in the forest. The robots reared before them and shook their weapons, while both hedgehog and fox were tensing for the battle to come.

Minutes passed.

"...so tell me again why I don't just spin-dash them?"

Tails sighed. "For the last time, this is turn-based, Sonic. We wait for everyone to choose their attack and their formation, then we exchange blows."

"…this is so stupid."

"Figures you'd say that, hedgehog. Patience was never your strong suit."

"Knuckles?!" Sonic had left his battle stance and blinked at the echidna that had just appeared and was standing there, crossing his arms in front of his chest and smirking. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm helping you save the world, what does it look like?" the echidna replied, frowning.

"But what about the Master Emerald?" Tails asked, one hand scratching his ear in confusion.

For one minute the Guardian just stared at him, seemingly not comprehending. Suddenly, though, he snipped his fingers.

"Oh yeah, that thing!" Shrugging, he added: "Well, so far I've completely ignored it for everything post SA2B, so I guessed it could take care of itself after all. Makes sense, doesn't it?"

A hundred miles away, a giant flood wave completely destroyed Station Square a second time.

Fortunately, it also drowned Chris Thorndyke in the process.

"No, I mean, why are you here at all?" Sonic asked, oblivious like the rest of them, that somewhere far off the greatest of all threats had already been eliminated. "Knuckles, in 'Sonic Chronicles: The Dark Brotherhood' you're supposed to be kidnapped."

"What?!"Knuckles stared at him, horrified. "That's not possible! That was never in the contract! Only female characters get kidnapped! Oh, and Tails," he added as an afterthought.

"Then either you get a butt-propeller or start wearing a dress. I've already out-gangsta'd you anyway." a haughty voice announced, coming from their right.

"Spending twenty hours alternately whining and running into walls due to wonky cameras is called 'retarded' and not gangsta, hedgehog." Knuckles shot back without missing a beat at the Ultimate Lifeform who had just materialized in a flash of Chaos Control. "Besides, your game got voted 'family game of the year.'"

"…I hate you."

"Uh, are you quite finished?" Sonic asked, raising his eye ridges as both Mobians glared at him. "I mean, if we could just get back to the game at hand…"

"No, we're not." Knuckles interrupted, "Who made up this stuff about me being kidnapped?"

"I think it's Bioware. They wanted to try something original." Tails replied, leafing through a version of the game script.

"Oh no, I've lost Froggy!"

Everybody's expression had frozen. The Mobians stood stock-still, possibly hoping that if they didn't move, they wouldn't be seen. Somewhere in the distant bushes, something large and purple scrambled past.

"What was that?" asked Shadow a few moments later as the threat had passed, the only one that had never seen nor grasped the utter horror of the Fishing Levels.

"…nothing you'd want to know about. Nothing anyone would have ever wanted to know about," Sonic muttered, thoroughly spooked.

"True. Why they decided to bring him back for this game is beyond me." Tails shrugged, going back to his script. "Anyway, the story for this RPG is really interesting. The mysterious enemies that are behind Knux' disappearance are called the Marauders-"

"What, you mean those guys?" the Guardian interrupted him, pointing to the right. A little bit further off stood four other anthropomorphs, the group consisting of a wolf, a dog, a stag and a rat, all of them wearing school uniforms and waving cheerfully. The wolf had his nose in a yellow book entitled 'Echidnapping for Dummies'.

"…it says here we should first blame a person called 'Sonic' for stealing the Master Emerald and then try to trick him, guys."

"Yeah great, Moony, because I'm sure that would work. Geez, I wish we at least could have kept our wands…" the black dog had crossed his arms in front of his chest annoyed, while the rat was apparently trying to hide behind an amused stag for protection.

"This is a joke!" Knuckles muttered, his hands before his eyes. "Any reputation I had left is ruined…"

"Great. We have four cosplay villains and one traumatized echidna. Oh, and Big. Anything else that's so great about this game, Tails?" Sonic asked, wondering why on earth Secret Rings 2 had to be postponed for this.

"Lemme guess, it'll be something revolutionary like finding the seven Chaos Emeralds. Ooooh, and maybe Eggman won't be the main villain in the game, because that hasn't happened before!" the hedgehog rolled his eyes, while everybody ignored the four strangers now dragging a desolate Knuckles into the woods. The echidna seemed to be too depressed to even struggle.

"Uh, well…" Tails was still leafing through the booklet, "As a novelty, the second part of the game will take place in a much darker world. You will turn into a wolf and have a strange midget riding on your back."

"What the hell?!" Sonic looked pale. He liked being a hedgehog, thankyouverymuch.

"Whoops, wrong game series. Sorry." The two-tail gave an embarrassed chuckle, re-arranging the booklets. "Though that with the dark world for part two is true." He cleared his throat and started again, his face breaking into a smile as he read the next words: "No, actually, you'll find out about your father!"

"My father? Mobius to Mr. McCloud, this is SEGA. I don't have any parents in this continuity."

"If this is SEGA, then this isn't Mobius. Get your sonicverses straight and cut the references." Shadow scowled.

"Yeah, and you can't have an RPG without the hero finding out about his father." Tails replied, looking irritated. "That's just weird."

"Fine, then I'll find out I never had a father. How's that for an exciting, last-minute plot-twist? Now where's Knux gone?" Sonic asked, scanning the area impatiently. He was already starting to think he didn't like this game at all.
"And besides," he grated at the black hedgehog (who was starting to look just a bit too smug for his liking), "there's no reason for you to grin. Heard of the new character 'Shade' yet? I bet my spiny behind that's some long-lost twin of yours or something…"

Shadow's eyes widened, his expression now as terrified as any character who had just been told that his canon was about to turn as bad as his fanfiction.

"Uhm, excuse me…"

"Now what?!" all of the Mobians snapped, turning around to the speaker.

"We have now finished choosing our attacks," The Captain of the Egg Pawns announced, "Can we roll the dice now to determine iniative?"

Sonic Chronicles - coming 2008

Heheheh, the funny part is that this is all true.

Well. Except for the father bit, but I agree with Tails. Without any 'No, Sonic…-wheeze-…I am your father,' I'll be thoroughly disappointed. Then again, I already wanted to beat my head against the wall when I heard about bringing Big in again. Wth? There should only be one cat about, and she might roast frogs but doesn't befriend them.

Seriously though, I am looking forward to this thing. I might even buy a DS. :D Agree/disagree? Favourite parts? Please review!