Chapter Two
Thermopolis came over today and I discovered what she and Lilly were talking about yesterday in G&T. Thermopolis Mom has a date with Mr G and Thermopolis was none to happy about it.
I found this out via my parents. Not that they directly told me, no, I overheard them trying to psychoanalyse Thermopolis (they're fourth favourite person to psychoanalyse after each other and us, Lilly and me, their two children. Mia is, in their books, basically their third kid; the nice one, the one who doesn't cause them any trouble and is moderately normal, unlike their two biological freaks. Yes, Lil and I feel the love.). I swear that psychoanalysing people is more than just a job for my parents; it's like their favourite past time.
Lil and I, when we were younger deduced that the reason our parents actually got married, was not so much because they loved each other but more that they thought that they would have twice the fun of psychoanalysing people if there was two of them so as to compare and discuss their discoveries.
Anyway, I was overhearing my completely unsubtle parents asking question after question, working their way up to the one that they're obviously been dying to ask the moment Thermopolis walked through our front door.
It's rather sad, really, just how desperate they've become to psychoanalyse someone at home since Lil and I had figured out our system to keep our privacy safe and secure. The Don't ask, Don't tell system and it's been working a dream!
Though it has now left Thermopolis to their mercy, but come on, we have to put up with them twenty-four seven, question after question after question… argh! It'd drive anyone mad! God, I can't wait for college next year!
Anyway, I was walking out to kitchen where my parents were still working their non-so-subtle way of getting the answer to their question out of Thermopolis. She was playing boggle with Lilly and I'm guessing was loosing pretty badly, if her little pout was anything to go by… ah, crap. Don't look at her mouth; focus on annoying, over-bearing parents.
Good, right, wait… what did Mom just say?
"Mia, how do you feel about your mother starting to date your algebra teacher?" Wait, what? Mr G asked Helen Thermopolis out on a date! Wow, he has gut, especially after what I heard happen to Helen's last boyfriend after she found out he was a Republican. She apparently she just dumped him right in the middle of their after she found and walked out of the restaurant without looking back. Which is rather cold, especially since Helen (even though she is Thermopolis mom and I have no interest in older woman), she really is hot. Every time Felix sees her, he goes kind of ga-ga and you can't get a straight word out of him until she's out of eye sight. But hey, good luck to him! Mr G, not Felix because that's just wrong.
"I feel fine about it." Yeah, right Thermopolis. That's why you look like you're going to be sick. No, seriously she was so green in the face, that it was so obvious that she was lying, that I couldn't help but start laughing because seriously she looked so damn cu…
Every head in the kitchen spun in my direction, where I stood in the doorway to the kitchen. Ah crap!
"Your Mom is dating Frank Gianini? HA! HA! HA!" Oh yeah, I am so going to hell for this. My parents looked at me all disapprovingly like, well Mom at least did, Dad looked more kind of curious. Guess he was wondering why I was acting like such a jerk all of sudden. Don't worry, Dad, I'm wondering the exact same thing.
Lilly looks ready to kick me and Thermopolis looks like I've kicked her! Great, just great…
"Please, Michael," she started out in this real squeaky voice that she only ever uses when she is seriously freaking out over something. This whole Mom dating her teacher thing is obviously causing her more issues than I originally thought. "Please, don't tell anyone." Yeah, like I was going to. Who the heck was I going to tell who was actually going to care? No one! Ok, maybe possibly Felix but like I'm going to tell him.
But it is kind of cute seeing her beg… going to special level of hell now! But even though I'm thinking this, it still doesn't stop me from saying.
"What'll you do for me, huh, Thermopolis? What'll you do for me?" for a moment she looks completely and utterly confused, like she is actually trying to think of things that she could actually do for me. But then she just starts frowning about something before offering to walk Pavlov and empty out Mom's Tab cans back to Gristedes for the deposit money (which is further proof that she has been Lil friend for way, way too long. I mean, what normal friend actually offers do stuff like that? What normal friend actually knows about the whole emptying your mother tab cans back to Gristedes for deposit money? None of my friends! Definitely not Felix whom I've known since the sixth grade and have been friend with for almost as long as Lilly and Mia have been friends!)
I gave up after that. I mean seriously, what the hell had I thought I would gain from this little exercise? Beside making Thermopolis go bright red.
"Forget it, ok, Thermopolis." I sort of growl, before stalking back to my room though not before I heard Thermopolis asking Lil what she had done that had made me so mad and my darling sister simply replied that I had been sexually harassing her.
Lovely! Great, thanks Lil. And all I bloody wanted was a bowl of cereal.
The parental unit went out a bit after this, before Thermopolis had gone home, but I decided since the parental unit was gone and the girls had moved to the den, I was now free to get my bowl of cereal without hassle. I serious don't want to be bombard by my parents in the demand to explain myself for my rude behaviour towards their favourite child.
I was walking past the den with my bowl of cereal. I could hear Star Wars playing and no matter what my mood I might have been in previously Star Wars always makes me smile… well the original do, not those new ones; the Phantom Head Case and the Attack of the Digital Affects!
Anyway, I was leaning again the Den's entrance, out of sight to the girl. I couldn't see the screen from where I was standing but I could still hear what was happening and I've watched them so many times, that I can close my eyes and still see what is happening.
"You don't think he'll tell, do you?" I open one eye at the sound of Thermopolis voice. "Your brother? About my mom and Mr G?" I hear Lil give a snort.
"Nah. Seriously don't worry about it. I told you before, for Michael to tell anyone about it, he'd actually need someone to tell and he has no friends, so, hence he has no one to tell." Thanks a lot Lil. And you've met Felix too, though that hadn't been the brightest of ideas due to Felix leaving my house with a close to broken ankle from one of Darling sister charming kicks.
"I don't get it though."
"Get what? Why your mom is dating Mr G or why my brother social life is non-existent." Lil replied in this bored tone. Lil isn't a huge Star Wars fan anymore; don't ask me why or how, she just doesn't enjoy it anymore, so for them to be watching it must mean that Thermopolis really is upset about her mom and Mr G.
"No, not that." Thermopolis started, she sounded like she was losing her nerve about whatever she was trying to say.
"Mia, spit it out." Lil growl in frustration.
"I don't understand why he is being so mean to me all of a sudden." Thermopolis literally spitted out. She had to repeat herself so that Lil and I, from where I was eavesdropping, could hear. I, admittedly, felt a little winded.
"Is that seriously bothering you?"
There was no reply, but I was guess that Thermopolis was nodding because Lil, in and this is a rare thing for her, a gentle voice and said. "It's fine. It's just a phase. He's been like that with everyone, its not just you, so don't worry about." Which is a complete lie because I haven't been acting like this with everyone, I've been acting normal with everyone else, it just her that I've been a jerk towards.
"Really?"
"Yeah. He's just being a big dope. Ignore him and he'll get over whatever it is that making him so jerky." God, hope so Lil.
I went back to my room after overhearing that little conversation. Star Wars for once not making me feel better.
I felt all churned up in the gut at what I had overheard, or rather the tones that I had heard the conversation being spoken in, in particulars, Thermopolis.
She actually sounded genuinely hurt by my… jerkiness towards her. I hadn't exactly thought that my behaviour towards her was actually hurting her feelings, I was just… I smacked the back of my head against my headboard, groaning. Dammit, I hadn't wanted to hurt her!
About an hour later, I heard Lil say bye to Thermopolis and the front door closing behind her before, unsurprising, actually I had been expecting it, the pounding of Lilly's fist upon my bedroom door.
"Open up, you Dope."
"If I say no, are you still going to break the door down?" I called back even though I was already up and off my bed and walking in the jaws of death that goes by the name of Lilly Moscovitz.
I open my door and looked down at my extremely short sister; it really is surprising at times that we actually come from the same gene pool.
"Why are you such an arse?" Lil snarled angrily up at me.
I shrugged, because seriously I was not about to explain my problems to her.
"Look, I don't care if you're an arse to everyone else outside this family or even an arse towards me, but leave Mia alone. She doesn't need your crap, what with all her other issues."
"She's fourteen years old, what issues could she possible have?" she kicked me for that one.
"Just leave her alone and stop perving on her. Seriously, go find someone your own age, you paedophile" I just gagged at her, what the fuck? Which is exactly what I said to her.
"What?" she said sounding suddenly defensive. "Isn't Mia good enough in your books to perv on? What, only blondes with big boobs do for you?" What the fuck? Which I repeated to her again though I failed to mention that Thermopolis was a blonde too, I didn't think that would sit too well with her, what with the mood that she was currently in. How the heck do I get in these situation? Seriously?
"Lil," I started, trying to remain calm, "what the fuck are you on about?"
"Nothing," she said suddenly smiling this really bright, freaky smile up at me. I hate it when she does that, "I'm just messing with you. And, ok, trying to figure out if your gay, but details."
I gagged at her again. "Gay? I'm not gay? Who thinks I'm gay?" God, did Thermopolis think I was batting for the other team?
"No one." Lilly said, patting my arm. "I just wanted to check that's all. You know, what with the fact that your last girlfriend was, hmm, what the seventh grade?" She eyed me searching as if waiting to see if I let anything slip as to my sexual preference. "And not to mention the fact that you've been kind of a jerk of later, so I was thinking that maybe you were acting out because you realised you were…"
"Lil, I'm not gay." I interrupted her quickly, "I'm just haven't been interested in dating." She kept giving me this searching look that caused me to groan, "Would you believe me and leave me alone if I said I just haven't found the right girl for me yet?" God, it sounds like I'm waiting for my flipping soul mate or something.
"Actually," she said slowly, "I would because you're weird like that. Ok, so good luck with that, whatever side of the bed you find your right "one" on." I'm seriously going to kill her one of these days, "but while your at," I looked back at her. Just go away already, I begged silently, god where the heck is the Force when you need it? "Stay away from Mia and stop being such a jerk towards her." The warning look was very clear and I felt like she had grabbed inside of me and had pulled out all my insides.
Brilliant. Just brilliant.
But I managed to keep my features under control as I promised (ok I admit it, I did cross my fingers behind my back when I did.), that I would stay "away" from Mia in my search to find my "right" girl. Then I closed my door in her face.
Fuck I hate my life!
I hate my life! I hate my life! I hate my life!
I hate my life! I hate my life! I hate my life!
I hate my life! I hate my life! I hate my life!
Pavlov, my sheltie, just howl with agreence with me, though it might have also something to do with Lilly's insanely loud music. Oh great, Destiny's Child, now I just know she's doing this to piss me off.
I hate my life! I hate my life! I hate my life!