She makes me feel so ugly
My heart is really on its knees
But I keep a poker face so well
That even mother couldn't tell
Seth felt suffocated. The Cullens would no longer leave him alone in fear that he would somehow get his hands onto another knife. He couldn't even shower or brush his teeth without someone standing in the bathroom with him. The only time one of the Cullens weren't breathing down his back was when he was at group therapy.
In fact, group therapy was the only time when Seth felt like he could truly breathe. And it wasn't even because for once no one was following him. No, it was because of that small, short, stubborn girl named Pyro.
Seth felt like Pyro was the first real friend he ever had in a while. She was the only person who he talked to at group therapy sessions, and he even let her take on wild adventures through the hospital after the sessions. She made him feel alive, and it was the first time in a while he felt something warm inside of him.
Pyro leaned over the small table they were sitting at so that her face was only centimeters away from his. Seth couldn't help but close his eyes and inhale the deliciously sweet scent that wafted over to him. When he opened his eyes, her lips were pulled back into an effortless smile that made the corner of his own lips begin to tug upwards.
"Burke is boring," Pyro whispered as the doctor encouraged whatever it was that Leonardo was painting. "Let's go to the kitchens." Seth raised an eyebrow at Pyro, but allowed her to pull him up.
"Mrs. Burke," Pyro announced loudly. "I'm hungry, Seth and I are going to go to the kitchens; we'll bring back some snacks for everyone."
Without waiting for a reply, Pyro dragged Seth out of the room before taking off down the hall. Seth wasted no time in following her as they moved through the long hallways before stopping in front of an abandoned janitor's closet. Pyro opened the door slowly only holding it open long enough for Seth to slip inside.
"Welcome to my humble abode," Pyro whispered as she flicked on the lights. They both sat in silence while their eyes adjusted to the light before Pyro grabbed a wire coat hanger and a cooler. "You want to see something cool?"
Seth grinned as Pyro pulled out a lighter. His facial expressions were all she needed to continue what she was going to do. He watched as she untwisted the wire coat hanger before twisting one end of it to be shaped like a swirl. She opened up the cooler revealing a large amount of ice water which only intrigued Seth even more. Pyro sent Seth a confident smile before clicking the lighter and allowing the fire to heat up the hanger until it had a strange glow.
"Are you branding yourself," Seth asked raising an eyebrow as Pyro pressed the metal against her shoulder.
"Yeah," Pyro replied wincing at the burn that began to form on her arm. After what seemed like forever, she pulled the hanger away and dipped it into the ice water. "How does it look?" She showed Seth the brand and he whistled lowly.
"Tuff," he muttered leaning in to get a better look.
"You want one?" She asked grabbing another hanger. "We can get a matching brand on our arms."
"I'm in," Seth immediately scooted closer to her in order to get another whiff of her scent.
Pyro tilted her head to the side as she assessed the boy in front of her. She had expected him to get antsy or even nervous, but here he was completely calm about everything. Without meaning to she smiled again, and just like last time he was eager to return it.
Seth watched while Pyro twisted the front part of the hanger into a heart shape. He noted that she was amazingly skilled at this before she held it up in front of the lighter. Before he knew it, both of their arms were pressed against each others, and she pressed the heart shaped hanger in the middle of their arms.
"Best friends," Pyro muttered as the room began to smell like burning flesh.
"Best friends," Seth repeated.
Esme hissed as she looked at the brand that Seth had on his arm. It looked like half of a heart had been burned onto the edge of his forearm, and she was positive that he had not left to go to that therapy session with that brand mark on his arm. The only way it would've gotten there was if someone had put it there.
"Seth, are you branding yourself?" Esme asked staring at the half heart. When he stayed quiet, she called Edward in. "Seth, who did this to you?"
Immediately, Seth began reciting the alphabet in his head over and over again. But when he got to the letter 'P' his thoughts began to drift towards Pyro and what they had done in the janitor's closet at the hospital. Before he could get a grip on his thoughts, Edward had recited what had happened to Esme.
"I can't believe you branded yourself!" Esme dropped Seth's hand angrily. "I'm going to call the hospital and–"
The phone that Esme had been reaching for disappeared off the cradle and when Esme turned she saw Seth holding it his hand. Esme pursed her lips at the boy who she began to think of as her son, but she stopped when she realized how desperate he was beginning to look.
"Don't take Pyro away from me too." He whispered. Esme paused unable to say anything. "What if they kick her out of therapy? She's my friend. I can't do this without her."
"Do what? You haven't gotten better. You're the same as you were a month ago!" Esme's yelling caused Seth to look down. "What is it about this girl?"
"She's his imprint." Edward whispered. The word imprint sounded foreign to Seth's ears, yet he knew that Edward spoke the truth. He had indeed imprinted on the little pyromaniac in his group therapy sessions.
"You imprinted and you didn't tell us."
"You would've taken her away from me!" Seth cried. With a sudden flash of anger he threw the phone at the wall cringing when it smashed into five different pieces. "You're taking everything from me." he whispered.
"Seth–"
Esme's words were cut off when Seth held up his branded arm for her see. "Now you can't take her away from me. She's always gonna be with me and nothing you can do is going to change that."
"We're not trying to hurt you, we're trying to–"
"You're trying to what? Help me! Just like taking away my knife is helping. You're not helping."
"Seth, please," Esme's words fell on deaf ears.
Seth and Pyro sat in a hallway of the hospital staring up at the white ceiling. Neither of them spoke after deciding that simply being next to each other was contact enough for the both of them. They didn't need words to communicate. A simply brush of the hand or raise of the eyebrow was enough to get the point across.
"Tell me something about yourself that you've never told anyone else," Seth whispered never breaking his staring contest with the ceiling.
"My real name is Alicia, like the singer Alicia Keys." Pyro replied. "What about you?"
"The reason I'm here is because my family walked in on me cutting myself."
"I accidently burned my arm once."
"I think I'm the reason my dad died.
"I burn stuff because the warmth of the fire makes me feel like maybe I'm not as cold on the inside as I think I am."
"I cut myself because pain is the only thing I feel anymore."
"Fire used to be the only thing that kept me warm."
"Pain used to be the only emotion I thought was real."
"I hate myself," Pyro whispered. There was an awkward silence and she swore she heard Seth whisper something that sounded dangerously close to, "I hate myself, too," but she couldn't be sure.
Together they sat in silence each of them wrapped up in their thoughts. Neither of them willing to admit that the only reason they felt anything anymore was because of the person they were sitting next to. Neither of them willing to admit that just sitting here alone was better therapy than talking to that Dr. Burke lady. Neither of them willing to admit that they depended on each other.
When Seth left to go home, his mind was still focused on Pyro.
Two weeks later, Pyro pulled him aside after another long boring lecture from Dr. Burke. The two of them stayed quiet for a while before she pulled out a black switchblade a lot like the one Seth had before the whole bathroom incident. She hadn't said anything except that she thought he should have one again.
"I didn't get you anything," Seth muttered as he flicked open the blade pausing to admire the way it shined in the light. "I should get you a lighter."
"Don't worry about it," Pyro shrugged. "You could take me to get some pancakes tonight in that amazing car of yours."
Seth lay in bed flicking the switchblade open and admiring the blade before flicking it closed. Sitting there holding that knife made him feel in charge again. It made him feel like there were still parts of his life he could control. Such as Pyro, the blade, and the branding on his arm.
At some point, Seth realized that he hadn't felt the need to cut himself anymore. It was like Pyro had made him forget about the feeling of relief cutting gave him. Pyro was like his substitute blade.
Later on when he looks into a mirror, he'll see his eyes are now almost halfway brown.