Disclaimer: teen wolf is not mine - just a few cute/fluffy/angsty/whatever one shots I felt like writing to tie in with my stories I'm no werewolf and deadly intentions, hope you like. And thanks for those that reviewed last chappie x
Kayla wasn't the type of person to feel much shame or embarrassment. She was blunt and straightforward and usually could make people feel embarrassed by one word or phrase. But looking onto Scott's and Stiles' face right now you would think she had just announced world war three was about to take place, like imminent death was about to happen.
Honestly, what drama queens.
She cocked an eyebrow at them, hearing Lydia snort behind her, "did I slip into Spanish?" She asked slowly as their gob smacked expressions stayed in place, "or should I spell it out for you too?"
"Uh... No... No, I think we, um, I think we got it" her boyfriend gulped nervously, a hand raising to scratch the back of his neck awkwardly, "pick up some... Some of those... Things"
"Yes Stiles, 'those things'" she rolled her eyes good naturally, hiding a smile by biting her lip, "they're six isles down, do you think you can manage?" She asked teasingly because she loved making those two squirm.
Stiles blew out a long breath, his eyes darting to the side to share a 'oh crap' look with Scott, "s-sure" he stuttered though he looked very unsure if she did say so herself, "a box of tampons... I can pick up a box of tampons, easy, no problem" he waved his hand nonchalantly even though his his voice was borderline panicked, "I can totally do that for you" but he stayed still, not moving an inch.
Kayla just sighed quietly, a chuckle threatening to break free, "never mind Stiles, if it freaks you out too much then I'll just-"
"No... No, no freaking out going on here" he took a hold of her arm before she could pass him down the isle, "there is a no freak out zone, all of this" he pointed his free hand to himself, "see? No freak outs"
Even though he looked about ready to faint, "Stiles, you don't have to prove yourself to me" she smirked, "loads of guys don't like buying tampons, it's not the be all and end all"
"It's-it's chill... I can totally get them" he did seem like he wanted to prove himself, "I'll just-" he jerked a thumb behind him, "-go... And get them... From the tampon Isle"
"Toiletry Isle" she corrected with a small smile - she could tell this was going to go great.
"Right, yes, that Isle... I'll definitely go" he sounded so nervous it was actually kind of cute, "right now... Right this very second" she raised her eyebrows as he just stayed still but his hand did curl around Scott's upper arm and poor Scotty looked like a soldier about to get pulled out into battle, "I'm your boyfriend, boyfriends do these types of things right?"
She snorted as he started pulling Scott with him, "some I guess-"
"Then I'll be one of those boyfriends" he nodded his head adamantly, "I'll just... Go..."
"Stiles what're you doing, I'm not-" but Kayla heard Stiles shush Scott urgently as they both flapped their way down the isle and round the corner, disappearing from sight.
"You're trusting your feminine health in the hands of those two?" Lydia's disbelieving voice floated to her ears as Kayla held back a laugh, "they'll come back with cotton buds or something equally dumb"
"Eh, my period is not for another three days, I have some time to kill, not quite surfing the Crimson wave yet Lyds"
"Hmmm" she hummed back in response, "still... Those two? I'm surprised they haven't dropped dead from heart failure yet"
"There's still time" she chuckled lightheartedly.
"Stiles I'm not your back up" Scott whispered to him as Stiles dragged him down the isle, his fingers tightly clenching the werewolf's sleeve, "you're the one on the front line, not me"
"War analogy? Oh god... Is that what buying tampons is like? Am I putting myself in physical danger? Is that why she sent me to get them?"
Scott just sent him this astonished gaze, his brown eyes staring at him like he had lost the plot, "no Stiles" he said obviously, "and she probably sent you just to make you squirm"
"Me, squirm? I'm not squirming. No squirming going on here" Stiles shook his head, "I'm positively calm"
"Yeah, sure" Scott smirked at him, jutting his head down a long Isle, "go on then, they're just down there"
"You are not leaving me" Stiles almost shouted out in panic, "I have no idea what to get"
"You can read can't you?" Scott smirked, crossing his arms over his chest, "I'll wait here, be your silent back up" and damn him for looking so amused by this.
"I hate you" Stiles grumbled, "I really hate you right now"
"No you don't"
"Do so" Stiles shot back, "and when we get home I'm going to roast your little werewolf ass over the fire" he pointed an accusatory finger in Scott's face, "then chop you up into a gazillion tiny little bite size pieces"
"A lot of talk going on Stiles" Scott smirked, "I thought you said you were 'positively calm'?"
Oh god dammit.
"I-I am" he stuttered, gulping nervously, "I'm really calm, super calm even, in fact I'm so calm I'm going to walk down this Isle and get my girlfriend a pack of tampons you know why? Because I'm calm" he nodded his head, "hm mmmm see? Walking... I'm walking" he started walking backwards, nodding quickly as Scott smiled at him, obviously realising the lie Stiles was telling, "in fact I'm so calm I don't need your help so go on, shuffle on back to the others and I will will prove to you all how calm I am"
He shouldn't have said that. Oops. He needed his trusty back up.
"Okay" Scott nodded, "you're by yourself now Stiles... Good luck" Scott let out a burst of laughter as he turned around to walk away, leaving Stiles well and truly alone.
"Oh crap" he whispered to himself, wincing as he stared ahead of him at all the feminine products that lined the isle, feeling like he was searching for a needle in a haystack.
"Okay, okay, you know what? You can do this, you can" he murmured to himself, eyes zigzagging across the shelves, "it's just a box of tampons, you've fought off werewolves and gigantic lizards, tampons are not that big of a deal, you can do it... You can" he was pep talking himself keeping his eyes diverted from the various females that shot him suspicious and confused looks.
"Uh... Okay, Uh..." He finally reached the section of the shelves, his eyes widening at the sheer amount of products, "oh my god... How many different things do girls need?" He whispered to himself, "I thought it was just as simple as sticking it up your hoohaa?"
Clearly not.
He reached for a packet, turning it over in the palm of his hand.
Medium length. Mid flow. Cardboard applicator.
Okay... Okay that seemed right didn't it?
He picked up another packet with his other hand, frowning down at the writing on the blue box.
Small. Heavy flow. Plastic applicator.
... Oh sweet Jesus.
Low absorbency. High absorbency. Cardboard applicator. Plastic applicator. No applicator. Short. Long. Super. Ultra. Heavy flow. Light flow. Each packet was different and by this point his head was spinning.
He speed dialled Kayla, well aware he was drawing a bit of a crowd.
"Yes Stiles? Did you get lost?" She asked amused and was sure he heard people chortling in the background.
"I don't understand" he stated, "they're all different sizes and materials and everyone is looking at me funny"
"You're just being paranoid"
"I'm not being paranoid" he stage whispered, "there's an old lady giving me a dirty look, I think they think I'm a pervert and I don't lie them thinking I'm a pervert when I'm not a pervert"
She laughed loudly at that, "Stiles stop saying pervert and just make an educated guess... My periods are heavy, go with that option"
He gulped, glancing again at the packets, "Uh... Ultra or super?"
"Super" she smirked.
"Oh okay, Uh... They're somewhere... Here... Okay Uh size?"
"You should know that better than most" she purred seductively and his cheeks turned bright red, blood rushing to his face.
"Uh... Okay um... M-medium?"
"Medium is fine" she sounded so amused by this it was unbelievable, "you got it now?"
"Oh god... What about applicators? There's so many like what is an applicator even? And where the hell do you put it?"
"Oh gosh... Stiles you're funny, just go for the plastic ones"
He reached for the box that had been selected, reading the instructions, "it says you... Holy crap" he exclaimed loudly, his eyes widening, "you have to... With that... And that goes... Oh my god" he felt like fainting, "and you go through this every month?"
"Without fail" she smirked, "is that sympathy I hear in your voice?"
"That's sympathy times a gazillion" he exclaimed, "oh my god... Oh my god that is torture, how do you do it? Does it not hurt? And how does it stay there? And what are those dangly little strings for-"
She interrupted him with a laugh of amusement and he could just imagine the way her nose would crinkle, her shoulders shaking, "how about you get that cute ass of yours back here and I'll give you a lesson and then maybe then you'll know why every month I want to scratch someone's eyeballs out"
"On my way" he nodded, "definitely on my way" he ended the call, holding the box of tampons and almost running head first into a woman, long blonde hair and suspicious brown eyes, her eyes narrowing at him.
"Uh... Um" he scratched the back of his neck, well aware he was in the female Isle and probably looking like some sort of deranged pervert, "I'm not... I wasn't... This isn't... I was just... I'm not a pervert" he said louder than he meant, causing a few people to stare at him in disgust, hell they looked about ready to call security, "you know what? I'm just going to..." He jutted his head in front of him, carefully manoeuvring himself around the woman, "yeah okay, yeah... Uh..." He didn't know what to say next, his cheeks flaming, his palms sweaty, "have a nice period"
Oh god... Stupid, stupid, stupid.
A/n) just rattled it out haha hope you all liked and please please review see you next time x