OK. Now. My initial intention was to post the whole fanfic on 31st of August, the twins' birthday. However, my schedule at work made me reconsider. Plus, I write painfully slowly. Now I'm not even sure I'll be able to finish it by the end of the week. But I'll try.
Ferealty, Dexay - guys, thanks a lot for you reviews, it means so much to me. I hope you'll like this next update. To the other readers - please review, feedback is extremely wellcome.
Furthermore, to any of you kind readers who can speak Greek - I'm sorry, I tried. What you'll eventually see was supposed to be Ancient Greek, but I myself doubt it is what I meant it to be.
08.31.16. 09:50 a.m.
Grabbing the party supplies, the four friends quickly made their way from the van to the Shack. Inside they caught up with Soos, Candy and Grenda. Melody probably was in the kitchen.
"Morning, guys," - Wendy greeted the team-mates briefly. - "The cake?" - she asked Grenda. The Rubenesque girl mutely pointed to the museum.
"The stands are in there too, dawg," - Soos assured her.
"Same for the presents," - Candy said.
"Great, now, get the table, get the stands in here," - Corduroy urged her friends. - "Move, people, daylight's burning!"
Robbie and Thompson brought specifically prepared table to the gift shop, while Grenda and Soos wheeled out the stands from the museum. Wendy and Tambry meanwhile unsheathed two large placards and were posting them up on the stands. The first placard had neatly organized and systematic frames with text and images, connected with each other by lines of different colours. The other placard had a lot of glitter and shiny stickers on it, and text and photographs were adorned with frilly thingies and beautified with floral motifs. When the placards were in place, the girls joined the rest of their friend. A deliciously-looking brownie cake baked by Candy and Grenda was in the honorary place in the middle of the table. On the right of it a present for Dipper was placed, while to the left, Mabel's present was. The rest of the table was taken by plates of cookies and sweeties, framed photographs of twins' most spectacular moments of the summer and several bouquets of flowers, including one severely depleted bouquet of butterflowers. Working together, the seven of them set the table in a very short time. They stood back, examining their handywork.
"Well, I'd say - good enough," - Robbie finally stated.
"Dood, looks fantastic," - Soos agreed.
"I'd be on heavens nine if I found such a table prepared for my birthday," - Grenda grunted.
"Can't wait to see their faces," - Wendy said. - "OK, guys, at ease. I think we did a good work. I'll go see Melody," - she added. The rest of the team went their respective ways - Thompson and Soos headed to the kitchen together with her, Robbie and Tambry left to the living room, Candy and Grenda went outside.
Melody was indeed found in the kitchen, she was making pancakes.
"Hi, Wendy," - she said, as the ginger entered the room. - "Hi, Thompson. Hi, honey"
"Hi again, sweetheart."
"Good morning, Mrs Ramirez."
"Hi, Mel," - Wendy responded. - "You've been here all morning?"
"Yeah, sure," - the woman responded. - "Doesn't it look like it?" - she pointed to the table that was bending under the weight of plates with sandwiches, fried corn, buffalo wings and hotdogs. - "Hungry?" - she inquired. Wendy, feeling her mouth water, could only nod. - "I thought as much," - she laughed.
"Dipper said we're part of the crew and can help ourselves with the food," - Corduroy said, not taking her eyes away from the table.
"Oh, and if he didn't say that I would totally make you starve to death," - Melody laughed again. - "Come on, I already figured you guys must be hungry. I made hot dogs specially for all of you." - she gestured at the plate that was standing in the corner of kitchen counter.
Several minutes later Wendy returned to the gift shop with a satisfied smile, licking last drops of mustard and catchup from her fingers. She looked around lazily, wondering what should she do to pass the remaining time before the twins come down. Ginger's wondering gaze fell upon the table, and something caught her attention, although she couldn't quite place it. She came closer, examining the table with diligence. Something was missing, she thought. Something important. And then she realized it, and ran cold. The set of brushes wasn't there.
Wendy looked over the table one more time. The brushes had to be there. They couldn't have fallen anywhere, as they were laying almost in the middle of the table. She looked under the table, just in case. Of course, it was empty in there. What if someone took them and- And what? Just brought them somewhere else? Who could have done that? Thompson, Tambry and Robbie knew that the brushes were a present to Mabel, although you can never be sure with Thompson. Although he was in the kitchen together with her the whole time. Still - Thompson... Soos or Melody? Not Melody, she was in the kitchen as well. Grenda or Candy? Nah, they wouldn't do anything like that. So, if there were any suspects, it were Soos and Thompson.
First, she found Thompson. He was still in the kitchen, drinking milk.
"Dude, did you take Mabel's brushes?" - she asked straightly.
"No, why?" - he said, parting from milk.
"They're missing, that's why," - Wendy said, leaving the kitchen. Soos was in the living room, watching TV together with Tambry and Robbie.
"Hey Soos, or you guys for that matter, have you possibly seen Mabel's present, the set of brushes?" - she asked.
"Sure thing, dawg," - Ramirez smiled, - "They're in the gift shop, on the table for the twins' presents."
"No, Soos, they're not there," - Corduroy shook her head. - "And we have to find out where did they go, real quick."
Returning to the gift shop, she saw a curtain that covered the entrance to the museum waggling slightly - somebody must have passed through there just a moment ago. Wendy then tossed a quick glance at the table, subconsciously hoping that the brushes somehow would be in place again. However, what she saw made her freeze in dread - the birthday cake was missing.
Wendy rushed to the museum. Turning behind the corner rapidly, she caught a glimpse of a picture that would have made her laugh any other day. Three tiny, the size of a gnome, roughly humanoid creatures with rotund round bodies covered in brown fur were running away, holding the tray with a cake and cackling fiendishly. Another one of their kind was awaiting for them further beside the wall, holding aside one of the wall planks with a piece of wallpapers. When the creature with the tray ran inside the hole, it quickly followed them, adjusting the plank back in place with quite some skill. Despite running on the top of her speed, Wendy failed to catch any of them, and when she tried to move the plank, it proved to hold in place unexpectedly firmly. Letting out a cry of frustration, the ginger slammed her fist on the wall, but that did not help either.
"So, what the hell happened?" - Valentino questioned. When Wendy came back to the gift shop, the whole gang was there, exchanging worried looks.
"Some sort of boggarts stole the pie," - Wendy groaned.
"So that's the reason behind my socks missing all the time," - Soos said.
"Apparently," - Corduroy continued, - "they've taken the brushes as well. Now they are hiding inside the wall, and we need to extract the cake and the brushes as quick as possible, before the twins come here."
"But they must've already changed, they can come here any minute," - Grenda reasoned.
"Then somebody, make them busy!" - gingerhead gritted her teeth.
"I can distract Mabel," - Candy suggested.
"Wendy, you go delay Dipper," - Robbie laughed. - "It's your job."
"Screw you Valentino, it's too early in the morning for your jokes."
"Dudes, don't argue, I'll go and make a small talk with him," - Soos said. - "I'll make sure he stays in his room while you'll go and search for the cake and Mabel's present."
"What did we miss?" - Dipper said, entering the gift shop. He was dressed in a dark grey check suit with a dark brown tie. His hair was combed, displaying the birthmark on his forehead at its finest. Following him, Mabel came into the room. She was wearing a floor-long formal dress, dark-blue with star motif. Atop her head, a circlet of blue and violet forest flowers was laying. There were asters, lupines, bachelor's buttons, fleabanes, and they were all fresh, although Wendy didn't see the circlet earlier that morning, or didn't see the Pines girl gathering the flowers. What was even more surprising, there were blue violets and blue-eyed Marys that naturally flowered in spring, and not in august. Corduroy decided that it is not the most uncommon thing about Mabel. All in all, the girl looked quite gorgeous.
The crowd of their friends let out a simultaneous sigh. Wendy stepped forth.
"Dipper, Mabel," - she began. - "We gathered here to give you somewhat of a surprise party before you go to the ceremony. We prepared presents for you, decorations and a pie. But when we all left the room for just one minute, the present for Mabel disappeared. And then we accidentally left the table without oversight for one more minute, and the cake was stolen. I think I saw whoever - or whatever - did this, it looked like a bunch of tiny creatures with brown fur, the size of gnomes. They ran to the museum carrying the cake with them. I couldn't catch them, but I saw where did they make their- lair, or whatever."
The twins in front of her were standing still, and their faces were absolutely deadpan. They were like marble monuments. Wendy was about to say that this was worrying her, when she noticed that Mabel was very slowly raising her grappling hook.
"Hold on, cake," - the girl said. - "We're coming."
Exactly one minute later the gang was standing in the museum at the spot where Wendy saw the creature crawl inside the wall.
"Wait here for a minute, dawgs," - Soos said. - "I'll get a crowbar and remove a couple of planks."
"That would hardly bring any results," - Dipper responded. - "And this is not necessary. Mabel?"
"On it," - the birthday girl flew off to the upstairs.
"Where is she going?" - Tambry frowned.
"Soon enough you'll see something entertaining," - Dipper smiled. In less than a minute Mabel was back with a tiny edgy bottle of dusty glass in her hand. A dark-purple liquid was vaguely visible inside. As soon as she was back at the place of presumable entrance to the tunnels, Mabel, suddenly turning dead-serious, opened the bottle.
"ἐλευθερία," - she said, making her friends twitch in surprise. - "ἀλογέω ἄβροχος." - Then she brought the bottle to her lips and drank the liquid down in one gulp. - "Ah," - the Pines girl said contentedly.
"Don't ruin your hairdo," - Dipper warned. His sister waved her hand at him before turning to the wall and slamming her head on it. Or at least, she made the exact move to crack open her skull against the wall, making Wendy hold her breath in surprise. But Mabel's upper half simply went through the planks and disappeared from sight inside the structure.
"Dude what the fuck!" - Robbie shouted. Pines guy shrugged.
"Aha!" - came Mabel's muted exclamation from behind the boards. Shortly after, a surprised and terrified squeak came from out there, and then Mabel retracted back to the hallway, holding a small and peculiar creature in her hand.
"This shit is totally fucked!" - Valentino said.
"What the hell is this?" - Wendy asked, pointing at the creature. It was the size of a gnome, sturdy and rotund, covered in brown fur. Its short arms and legs were flailing helplessly in the air, while its head with what looked like something between muzzle and human face rotated from side to side, scrutinizing surrounding with small black eyes and sniffing the air with a big meaty nose.
"Ew," - Robbie grimaced.
"Aw!" - Mabel brightened. - "So cute!"
"Whoa, rad!" - Soos shouted.
"What is this thing?" - Tambry asked, peeking from behind Robbie's shoulder.
"A brownie," - Dipper explained.
"So it was a brownie that stole a brownie pie?" - Wendy asked mistrustfully. - "Why does stuff like that always happen when I think that Gravity Falls can't surprise me with anything anymore?"
"You'll get used to it," - her boyfriend sighed. - "Again. Mabel, what's in there? Did you see your present - what was it, by the way? - or the cake?"
"Nope and nope, there is no lair inside the wall. Instead, there's, like, a system of tunnels and passages, or something like that. Cosy. I wouldn't mind living inside the wall for some times."
"Practically 'the Rats in the walls' by HPL," - Dipper murmured. - "OK, let's go, we have an interrogation to run."
The brownie never stopped screaming on their way to the gift shop - luckily, it didn't take long. There Mabel put it on the floor, however, maintaining her hold on the creature so it couldn't run away. Dipper took a small sweetie from the tray on the birthday table and gave it to the brownie. It went silent that very moment. Its tiny fingers started swiftly unwrapping the sweetie. Then the creature tossed the wrapper away and began eating the treat, holding it with both hands in front of its muzzle, like a mouse or a squirrel.
"Will you talk now?" - Dipper asked.
"More," - the brownie squeaked, reaching with his Lilliputian hand.
"What's your name?" - Mabel asked.
"Brownie!" - the creature said.
"Is he asking for food again?" - Wendy whispered.
"Is that your name?" - Pines guy suggested.
"Yeah," - the creature squeaked excitedly. - "Brownie. More!"
"Are all of your kind called this?" - Mabel frowned.
"Yeah! More!"
"They don't have names?" - Dipper said. - "That's peculiar."
"I'll call you Mr Fluffston- stein!" - Mabel exclaimed decidedly. - "Esquire."
"Look," - Dipper explained patiently. - "Do you want any more sweets? If you do, please bring us back what you took from here- somebody, what was Mabel's present again?
"Brushes," - Tambry said.
"OK, brushes. Bring them back here. If you do that, I'll give you more goodies."
"And the cake!" - Candy and Grenda said in unison.
"Girls, I'm sorry, but I fear the cake is in no shape for us to eat anymore," - Dipper reasoned. - "I mean, do you really think these creatures will restrain themselves from eating the sweet cake once they bring it to their lair?"
The girl exchanged looks.
"We'll make you a new one," - Grenda promised.
"Deal. So," - he turned back to the brownie. - "Do you understand me? We will give you a lot more candies and sweeties-"
"Nomnoms," - Mabel interrupted.
"-if you bring us back the brushes you took. Are we clear?" - Dipper asked hopefully. The creature started nodding ardently. The gang around started smiling at the sight of brownies adorable manners, but they soon started to frown when they realized that it was still standing before them, showing no intention to go anywhere. - "What are you waiting for?" - Pines asked.
"More!" - the brownie squeaked. The gang let out an almost simultaneous groan.
"Fine," - Dipper said appeasably, taking another sweetie. - "I'll give you one more, but you'll go to your friends and tell them what I told you. Bring back the brushes." - The brownie snatched the treat from his hand and ran away. The guy could only shrug.
"Do you really think that'll help?" - Robbie asked. Pines guy shrugged again.
"OK, everyone," - Wendy called. - "Now as all we can do is wait for the tiny guys to bring us back Mabel's present, let's not waste time any longer. We still have a couple of twins to celebrate!"
"Happy birthday to you!" - a somewhat discorded choir started to sing, putting stupid blissful smiles on twins' faces.
"Guys!" - Dipper smiled once they finished. - "Guys!"
"You're the best!" - Mabel shouted. - "Every single one of you!"
"So, OK, to the presents now," - Corduroy said. - "Dipper, this is for you. A compass," - she handed him a simple round black box with a flip cover. Opening it, he saw a sidereal 32-point wind rose and a couple of diminutive spheres, red and blue, that hovered over diametrically opposite sides of the disk. He closed the box and shook it slightly, and, opening again saw the spheres still in places. He rotated the compass so that the spheres would be over the North and South, respectively. - "And it's not just any compass," - Wendy continued. - "It's made of some spare parts salvaged from the- that secret thing under the valley only you, me, Mabel, Dr Pines and McGucket know about."
"This is frustrating, Wendy never told us where did those tiny beads come from," - Candy complained.
"Neat," - Dipper lowered his head in a respectful manner. - "Certainly didn't expect that, good job, guys."
"Dr Pines did most of this," - Robbie said, - "So it's not much of our service anyway."
"But the idea was ours," - Candy pointed out.
"Moving on!" - Wendy announced. - "Material possessions are one thing, but memories - something completely different. Check out how much remembrance of you we could gather," - she pointed to the placards. The twins exchanged looks before coming closer and examining them. Dipper's placard was an elaborate diagram of his photos, schemes or photographs of his most notorious mysteries solved and adversaries defeated, and even his quotes. In the centre of the sheet, on a spare place some list of several entries was prined. Dipper started to read aloud:
"Dipper Pines is so badass that gremoblins see their worst nightmares when they look into his eyes
Dipper Pines is so badass that he haunts ghosts
Dipper Pines is so badass that he could teach manotaurs to be manly, but he has better things to do
Dipper Pines is so badass that he opens Universe Portals wherever he wants with his left hook
Dipper Pines is so badass that that he single-handedly defeated Gideon-bot with his bare hands at age of twelve
Dipper Pines is so badass that stars formed the Big Dipper constellation to resemble birthmark on his head"
The guy shook his head.
"Now we have to add: 'Dipper Pines is so badass that he defeated a monster gnome without even lifting a finger'," - Thompson meekly said.
"That's not worth mentioning," - Dipper waved his hand. - "But still, guys. OK, Mabel, what you've got?" - they proceeded to Mabel's placard.
"Mabel Pines is so cute that even her pet pig can win a beauty contest.
Mabel Pines is so cute that kittens want to pet her
Mabel Pines is so cute that twelve-years old girls want to wear braces to resemble her
Mabel Pines is so cute that her painting and photographs are soft as softer then chinchilla's fur
Mabel Pines is so cute that everything that is good in the world wants to be knitted on one of her sweaters
Mabel Pines is so cute that vampires are enchanted into submission by the power of her gaze."
"Hey, that one actually happened," - Mabel cried.
"Yeah, Mabes," - Tambry said. - "We know. That doesn't make you any less cute."
"More!" - sounded from behind them. When the gang turned around they saw a small crowd of brownies gathered in the gift shop and reaching out to them with their hands. The one in the front held a set of brushes in his minuscule paws.
"Oh microdudes, you already!" - Soos exclaimed.
"And there's so many of them," - Candy hemmed.
"A deal's a deal," - Dipper shrugged, picking up a handful of sweeties while Mabel took brushes offered to her. Receiving the sweets, brownies quickly retreated back to the museum.
"That's what I like," - Mabel beamed, raising the brushed above her head. - "Plus, I get to know the brownies, all the perks!" - she looked at the brushes more closely. - "Wait, why are they already colourful?"
"They are made of unicorn hair," - Candy explained.
"What?! No! Seriously?!" - Mabel gasped. When her friends nodded, she raised her head to the sky (or to the ceiling that substituted the skies in the gift shop) and let out the most excited squeal any of them had ever heard. - "Unicorn hair! Now I need a palette of paints made of unicorn blood and fat, and I'm set!"
"OK, pretending you never said that," - Wendy murmured.
"Guys, just how much time did it take you to prepare all this?" - Dipper asked.
"That's not important," - Robbie laughed.
"Dude, it was our pleasure," - Soos said.
"How much time did it take you to save Gravity Falls?" - Candy responded.
"Um- which year?" - Dipper rubbed the back of his neck. - "In any event, we're probably the two luckiest twins in the world, having friends like this," - he said.
"And each other," - Grenda added.
"Hey, lucky twins," - Melody said, - "hate to brake it to you, but shouldn't you be going now? The ceremony starts in twenty minutes."
"True," - Pines checked his watch. - "Heh, no way around that. Mount up, people, and let's all pray the ceremony wouldn't be too tedious. Although, whom am I kidding..."