Full Summary: Have you ever imagined being "isekai-ed" before? Well, she's kinda too old to fantasize about that shite. She was still, however, thrown into the world of Naruto unprepared... whilst also being in the body of her game character, which, FYI, is the opposite gender and more than a little crazy in the head.
Warning(s): Slash/Yaoi, Isekai shenanigans, Necrophilia, Disturbing themes, Killings/Murder, Child soldiers
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, obviously. Lol.
When she woke up this time around, she didn't even have the energy to cuss out loud. Her poor head, unfortunately, felt like someone had just finished playing smash the watermelon with it. Not to mention her eyes. Oh, how they teared up at the sheer brightness of everything even behind closed lids. With what little strength she could find, she threw an arm over her eyes, exhaling in relief when her headache softened ever so slightly.
She didn't know what kind of shite she had drank to deserve such an intense hangover, but she swore up and down she had not touched any liquor for close to a fortnight. Work had taken up most of her days, and she would rather watch anime or play games then go out and get drunk on her lonesome. That would be just too sad, even for her low standards.
With a rather unladylike snort, she kept her eyes closed whilst trying to push herself up. Trying was the keyword. Her body was trembling with the effort to even move an arm. It was as if all her energy had been sapped out of her; which was very worrying... She feared having been drugged. When she finally managed to plant her hands on either side of her, she faltered. Her palms came into direct contact with grass rather than her soft mattress. She disregarded the warning bells in her head and pried her eyelids open, only to close them immediately after with a pained hiss.
Ever had the experience of watching a movie in 8K ultra HD for an extended period of time when you're only used to 480p graphics? Multiply that by ten. Then you'll get the gist of what she was experiencing right now.
Everything was too sharp and focused, causing big fat tears to continuously roll down her cheeks. It strained her eyes so badly that she couldn't help but let loose a whimper. Her trembling hands continued to feel around her, her breathing getting more and more erratic as she felt nothing but grass and pebbles underneath her fingertips.
She didn't know how she came to be sleeping outdoors. And she doubted that she had been kidnapped since she was neither rich nor attractive. As for this being a dream? She has never had such a realistically painful dream before.
With a hand on her chest, she took a deep, calming breath... only to falter when her palm brushed against nothing but a very FLAT and HARD chest. She bit her lower lip as she tried to think of a plausible cause as to why (and how) her boobs were missing. She needed them! Those two soft lumps of fat allowed her to lay flat on her stomach and use them as pillows to steady herself whilst watching movies on her laptop.
Before she could fall into massive hysteria, she heard something akin to a switch being flipped in her mind. She felt her rising emotions get cut off, a whisper of something telling her to calm down and think logically. Shinobi shouldn't allow emotions to cloud their judgment. They needed to be rational.
... But when did she ever become a shinobi?
And as if she had stepped on some sort of forbidden landmine, memories of a life not her own came to the forefront of her mind. They were sparse, but she was getting to a terrible theory of what has happened to her.
This body she took over was named Uchiha Shiki - her game character. And what little of the memories she had unknowingly triggered gave her nothing but chills. Especially when she 'experienced' them as if she were him. And that wasn't all. She found out that the half-arsed backstory she created for him warped him into something... different. Disturbed. The obvious plotholes she left due to her 'whatever' attitude were filled by him with something even a terrorist would shy away from.
Shiki was a downright cold-hearted killer. He has never once felt remorse, only sick pleasure. He was broken and ugly on the inside. He enjoys challenges; especially near-impossible and outright suicidal S Rank missions that could (would) potentially turn into a bloodbath. He was also obsessed with mirrors, having been vain since childhood. Not to mention his... perverted taste in bedmates (and she uses that term loosely).
To sum it up in a few short words; Shiki was a bloody narcissistic necrophilic psychopath.
She and he, however, have a few common traits that disturbed her more than they reassured her. What could be said about her when she and he were so alike in their characteristics? She did, after all, create him with the very intentions of putting herself in his shoes since he was supposed to be her roleplaying character.
The most recent memory was of Shiki having an exhilarating (nausea-inducing) trip through the 'final dungeon', slaughtering any person he encounters, before meeting the Rikudō Sennin. And after humoring the old man, a black hole opened up and sucked Shiki inside as the final boss said words that made her want to curse him to hell and back.
"You are destined for great things, my successor and descendant from another world. Once again, I can not thank you enough for accepting the role of being my world's peacekeeper - and protecting it from the hands of my mother."
She couldn't help but curl into herself.
It can't be...
Had she...
Been...
Isekai-ed?!
Coming to terms with the (revolting) memories almost gave her one hell of a mental trauma. Or maybe it already did and she lost one too many screws to give a fuck.
For now, she should ground herself to 'reality'. Talking out loud might help. She wasn't able to do anything else, anyway, what with her body feeling like jello.
"Oi oi oi... Did that geezer really 'entrust' me with the future of 'this world', as well as allowing Shiki - a deranged psychopath - to be a peacekeeper, of all things?" She - he - deadpanned as sh- he lay on her- his back and stared gloomily at the clouds floating freely in the sky.
How sh- he envies those inanimate objects. So fluffy and free from bothersome things...
"As much of a Naruto fan I am, I don't feel like saving the world at all. I mean, I'd rather go back to playing with corpses- no, I meant, I'd rather go back to helping the police solve homicides by performing autopsies. Or, rather, I'm not a hero. I'm more of a 'watch the world burn' type of girl- uh, guy." S- He groaned.
This gender thing was going to be such a pain in the arse. She paused. Not in a literal sense, of course. Just figuratively. She has never had anal sex before and wasn't too eager to try it... As for sticking her... Uhh...
Ok, stop. She didn't want to think about the change of genitalia right now. It was time to switch topics. It would be better if HE made a list to go through. Just to bind himself to the present and not lose any more of his sanity. He seriously couldn't afford to.
1. Name? Yan- No. Shiki. Uchiha Shiki.
2. Age? 35. Uh, 21. Shiki's 21.
3. Gender? ... Male. He. Him. His.
4. Location? In a forest somewhere.
5. Game? There's no such thing as virtual reality nerve gears just yet.
6. Occupation? Forensic medic-... uh, shinobi.
7. Hungry? Famished.
Once again, he groaned in despair. This was definitely a stupid 'isekai' scenario. Shouldn't a teenager be the one who took his place? Why a middle-aged oba-chan of all people? This makes no bloody sense! And that old man...! He called Shiki his successor and descendant. He was 100% sure that that was the result of his Title; God of Shinobi, and his character's Indra design.
Wow. Ok. Take a deep breath... and out. In... and out...
For now, he should check to see if any of the gaming mechanics had followed him here. And then he needed to see if he could defend himself in this 'kill or be killed' world.
"Status." He said out loud.
...
Uh... Ok.
That was severely disappointing.
He should try other words just in case, though.
"Menu. Settings. Commands. Options. Friends. Contact GM. Message. Skills. Equip... Inventory?"
He mentally ticked out gaming mechanics from his list whilst grumbling out loud.
"Bugger. What kind of incompetent isekai shite is this? At least give me something... It's stupid that I don't even have an item box- hn?!" His half-lidded eyes widened comically as a memory suddenly popped to the forefront of his mind.
Who would've guessed that the game inventory was actually a tattoo-ed storage seal?! It was no wonder he had to spend months of none stop grinding for his Fūinjutsu Skill to advance into Master level in order to upgrade his inventory space! He almost shed tears of happiness when he learned that useful fact.
He was quick to roll up his left sleeve (haha it took him about 10 minutes), his right palm hovering unsteadily over the huge arse QR code tattoo that covered the entirety of his inner wrist to his elbow. It prompted a list of items and equipment to appear in his mind's eye. He couldn't help but sigh in relief when he saw that everything from the game had traveled along with him. He chose a box filled with a few military ration packs and a bottled water.
This body was unfamiliar, but instinctively, he knew that he was out of chakra (depleted, no wonder he was so weak). Perhaps even due to the weird black hole thingy. So the first on his to-do list was to eat and rest. Then he would practice his chakra control and familiarise himself with this body. Afterward, he would find out where and when he had been dropped off... and play it by the ear.
He wasn't getting involved if he could help it.
Nope.
Like hell he would 'save the world' or whatever peace crap the old dude wanted him to accomplish. Leave it to the main characters, yeah? If Naruto and co could defeat Madara and the Rabbit Goddess without any interference from nosy outsiders for the first time around, why should he bother with changing anything? He knew that his shishou[?] (a small memory of an older looking Naruto ruffling Shiki's hair flashed by) was a monster in his own right.
It would be wise to let the events play out without changing a single shite. Besides, 'Shiki' was a psychopath, anyway. 'Shiki' wouldn't care about anything but his own power and looks... the narcissistic bastard.
Nodding sagely to himself, he tore a pack open... only to grimace at what was inside. It looked like minced meat that was jellified - or cat food, to simplify it. Never before has he smelt such a horrid stench before. And he has no choice but to consume it, too!
... He pinches his nose and ate it like a traumatized POW victim.
It took him a whole month to (somewhat) familiarize himself with this new body of his.
The first time he walked, he tripped over his own two feet and face planted onto the ground, eating grass and dirt in the process.
The first time he practiced hand seals, he almost dislocated a few fingers.
The first time he molded chakra, he spat out mouthful after mouthful of blood due to almost shutting off all his organs.
The first time he tree walked, he was blasted almost a hundred meters away due to his poor chakra control.
The first time he water walked, he realized that this body couldn't swim and almost drowned.
The first time he did a Taijutsu kata that Shiki had long since mastered alongside his clan members, he smacked himself in the face and gave himself a black eye.
The first time he did a Kenjutsu kata that Shiki had learned since childhood, he almost sliced his own arm off when the katana flung out of his grip.
The first time he performed Genjutsu, he (somehow) trapped himself in a 72 hours nightmare(?) which he later learned was the fucking Tsukuyomi.
The first time he performed Ninjutsu, which was the Great Fireball Technique, he almost burnt his vocal cords and made himself mute for a whole week.
The first time he activated his clan's Dōjutsu, his world became 12K ultra HD and almost blinded himself when he panicked and scratched his eyelids.
Well, let's just say that even now, he often than not misjudges the distance due to the longer limbs and became somewhat clumsy even though Shiki in his memories has never once flailed like a penguin before even back when he had been a toddler. He would, eventually, grow out of his clumsiness (he hopes), though.
With an emotionless face, (s)he... has finally accepted being Shiki. Although he was into all that self-acceptance (and the occasional self-denial) crap, he still didn't know if he would feel guilty after a kill. A small part of him didn't want to find out, afraid of the result of the discovery, whilst a bigger part of him only felt excitement at the thought of spilling blood.
That deadlier part of him was the one he tried his very best to control. He named it Shi-chan. And yes, he knew that giving it a name would encourage a split personality to form, but it got confusing after a while, ya know? So he named his dark passenger - his primaral instincts - Shi-chan to make it sound cuter and less deadly. And no, he wasn't giving it a gender because he didn't want to humanize it.
... Moving on.
He was currently bathing in a river nearby and decided that it was high time he explored this world. And hey, maybe he could work as an autopsy doctor again? The Uchiha clan was supposedly the 'police' of this world, weren't they? Hopefully, they hadn't been massacred yet. It would be inconsiderate of them to die whilst he was searching for a job.
After dressing himself in his usual set of clothing and mittens (he found out that his equipment still gave him an extra boost in stats, even though he couldn't quite open his stats window), he wrapped his forehead protector around his left bicep and shrugged on a black trench coat.
Back when Shiki was merely a game character, the forehead protector could only be equipped on the head slot, but now that this was the reality, he could wear it anywhere and still have the boost in stats. Nukenin head protectors gave a lot of benefits, but the cons truly outweigh the pros... So he was lucky that he could hide it underneath his coat.
Using Shi-chan's 15 years worth of ninja intuition, he navigated his way out of the forest and onto a dusty road path. He wasn't sure of which way led to Konoha, or if this road was even connected to the hidden village, but he knew that the Fire Country was filled with a never-ending amount of trees. So the hidden village must be around, ya? For now, he walked the path like a normal civilian, his gaze not once leaving the sky as he cloud watched.
He realized, after a whole month, that cloud watching soothed him and Shi-chan. The bloodthirsty urges disappear when this mundane activity was in play. This was something he got from her, he supposed - her relaxed nature. Shiki wasn't one to idle, after all...
The other reason why he didn't travel via trees was simply due to his (clumsiness) uncoordinated limbs. He wouldn't be able to keep his balance whilst cloud watching. And he suspects that Shi-chan was silently crying rivers of blood at how awkward this body was now - thank god he didn't know where Shi-chan's consciousness has gone to. Maybe character-Shiki has already disappeared entirely, or maybe they merged. Thus why he was having a hard time distinguishing between Shi-chan and himself.
He hoped it was the former. Merging with a psycho wasn't something he wanted. But it explained so many things...
"Look, boys. A lone traveler. And no forehead protector - ain't a shinobi!" A shrilly male's voice spoke as a group of bandits moved to surround Shiki in a circle, far enough to keep out of reach, but close enough to intimidate.
Oh great. Just as he was about to have an epiphany, he gets interrupted. He reluctantly tore his sights away from the fluffy clouds and stared impassively at the man who spoke. He waited with bated breath, expecting to feel some sort of denial and/or distress since, on the inside, he was still a civilian woman who only has experience with cutting dead bodies open.
Nothing of that sort happened, even as his eyes took in all the crude looking men.
He felt no fear.
Only anticipation.
Fuck.
Shi-chan was yelling for their blood.
He bowed his head and worried his bottom lip, trying desperately to contain his dark passenger. It was difficult. His facial muscles fought to keep a neutral expression, to prevent a demented grin from splitting it in half. That ugly thing wanted to be let out.
"What's this? Scared? Hahahaha! Let's teach this pretty boy a lesson, eh?! I'm sure some pervert would pay a great price for him." The same person crooned as the men laughed and leered.
... Slave traders. Filth, the whole lot of them.
As he wasn't in the right mind to pay attention to his surroundings, he didn't realize that one of them had gotten close. As soon as he felt a hand touch his forearm, he lashed out.
He didn't realize that his soft features had twisted into an ugly smile with too many teeth.
He didn't realize that his half-lidded eyes were now wide and full of bloodlust - his pupils blown to hell and back.
He didn't realize that Shi-chan's urges had overwritten him.
His body moved with muscle memory alone, reaching into his inventory seal and smoothly sliding out a katana that was known to be the best in the game (a present from shishou). It danced through the air and beheaded the bandits within seconds. There was no epic Ninjutsu or fancy moves. Just pure and lethal Kenjutsu.
The 'fight' (if it could be called that) ended within moments of him pulling out his blade. Blood painted the ground almost beautifully. His crimson red eyes (when did he activate them?) were wild as they took in all the bodies in with a perverted sense of detachment; as if wanting to burn this carnage into his memory permanently.
And then his breath started to hitch, lust coursing through his veins and stirring his lower region. His left hand still held his katana loosely, but his right had already started to palm his crotch. He dropped to his knees and moaned lewdly, his half-lidded eyes not once straying from the bodies littering the floor.
Nimble fingers freed his dick from its confines, already rock hard and slick with pre-cum. He didn't hesitate to crawl over to the nearest corpse. And like an animal, he licked and nibbled at the body's neck, his teeth grazing the jugular vein in an overly teasing but dangerous manner if the person had still been alive - especially with how sharp his fangs were.
This was his ritual. A way of claiming what he considered to be his.
His hands, which were now free of mittens, roamed the unmoving body as if a lover's caress. He enjoyed the feeling of skin that was slowly but surely losing its warmth due to the cold embrace of death. It was all so intoxicating.
He all but tore the clothing off the corpse. He wanted to feel more skin. He needed to.
More more more more!
minemineminemiNEMINEMINEMINE-
"Mmnnh..." His spine arched as he released another groan of pleasure, his hips doubling its speed to gain more (sweet, sweet) friction, rubbing aggressively against the cooling body's thigh. He was close. Oh very close. The pressure building in his lower abdomen was maddening. His head, full of nothing but desire, was then recklessly tossed back, neck bared and pupils dilated as he came with a euphoric expression on his face. He didn't mind the drool that dribbled down his chin, too caught up with riding out his orgasm.
It was only a few minutes later did he come down from his high to realize what the fuck he had done.
His pupils were still blown from pleasure, but his expression was twisted into something unidentifiable. This was a frightening eye-opening experience for him. To see first hand how disturbed Shi-chan's mind truly was. To be at the mercy of this body's lustful needs was too scary. His throat released a strangled sound. And without further delay, he scrambled off of the (sullied) corpse to tuck himself in before he all but ran from the scene of the crime, his mittens, coat, and face all splashed with the blood of the bandits.
And he felt no guilt.
This was now his reality.