As she drove back to their home, an apartment in Fep City, Norri ventured, "What does it mean that you want Doug with you, Mellie?"
"I just, I, I do. I can't explain it."
"So you don't want me."
"No, no, I mean, I want you to understand," Melissa tried to explain, "This is horrible, uncharted territory. There are no chances for a happy ending here. They do not exist. Back in '57, when Doug was in the other universe, the other side of the pond, well, he's told me a bit about that. He said that there was no happy ending for him, either. It wasn't until he started to dream about Lili. And then the Calafans found a way to bring him over, and here we are, after a few, I dunno bends in the road."
"The biggest bend was him, as I recall. You did not end it – and neither did I – when he came into our lives. I suspect that could have happened, you know."
"Were you considering it, back in '59 when our arrangement started?"
"I'll admit it crossed my mind, Mellie. I won't lie to you about that. But I've seen; he's been good to you. The entire arrangement is a loving one. Every piece of this puzzle is necessary, in order to make it all work, to make it fit. I, I had thought when Neil was born that the number of pieces would be capped at ten. It was for so very long. Is Kevin the eleventh piece?"
"I think he is," Melissa stated. "I want to at least try to explain, but I'm not even so sure I understand it myself. See, I know there's going to be a tragedy here. The question does not take the form of if. It takes the forms of when and how. I know how badly Kevin is hurting; or at least, I think I do. I am more connected to him than anyone else."
"That may be the case for his entire existence, you know," Norri commented as she parked their car.
"Right; that's not outside the realm of possibility. But for that time period, however long it is, I wanna maintain that connection. However fragile and unreal and hopeless it is, I wanna, I guess, I just wanna see it through, I suppose. At night, when we dream, I connect with Doug."
"Just like Lili connects with Malcolm."
"Of course," Melissa allowed, "and that connection – our connection – I wonder if we could maybe even connect to Kevin. Even if we can't, I want us to try. I want so very badly to, to try. Even if we fall flat on our faces – and I bet your last dollar that we will. But I still want to try."
"Three's a crowd. Hell, six is. I think I can understand, a little bit, about why you might want to try, Mellie. But if all you are going to do for the next eight or so months is try to connect with Doug, then you don't, you don't need me."
They were in front of their open apartment door. Human and Calafan tenants filed past. "I do need you," Melissa replied, "but, uh, not for this. Please don't be mad at me."
Norri thought it over, and waved her key – a bit of plastic with a notch cut out of one side – in front of the door's lock. Once they were inside and the door was closed, she replied. "I'm not, I am not angry. Not anymore. I'm just hurt. I will admit that. But I will not push it or try to make you feel guilty. I can see your mind is made up." She flipped open her communicator. "I wanna talk to Lili Beckett, on Lafa II, just outside of Fep City."
"Yes?" Lili asked, knees cracking a little as Doug helped her up from the floor.
"Can me and the boys stay with you?"
"I was just about to suggest that."
Meanwhile, at the small schoolhouse for humans, the four kids were having so much trouble concentrating that Miss Elenyakiah finally dismissed them early. Empy and three of her brothers walked along, not heading home immediately. "Well?" she asked.
"Well, what?" asked Tommy.
"C'mon; you know."
"Yeah, well, sure I do. But what is there to talk about?"
"How do you feel about it? All of you, I mean," Marie Patrice ventured.
"I haven't been on this end of things; neither has Dec here," Neil said. "Weird; it's weird." Declan nodded.
"Do you remember when Dec and Neil were born?" Tommy asked, "'Cause I sure don't. In a way, this is my first rodeo, too."
"Right," she said absently, "if anyone of us remembers what it's like to get a new sibling, it's Joss." She flipped open her communicator. "Yeah, I wanna talk to Joss Beckett; he's on Earth, at Cornell, uh, undergrad. He's a freshman."
"Empy, c'mon, don't bother him," Neil said, but Empy was already hearing Joss. The three teenaged boys all leaned in closer to be able to hear.
"Yeah?" he asked. She asked him the same question. "Man, well; I kinda remember when all of you were on the way," Joss admitted. "With Empy, I was pretty jealous. I don't remember it too much, but yanno; it was the sibling rivalry thing. I didn't really understand where Tommy was coming from until later. I kinda got the concept of Neil and Dec on the first shot, though."
"What'd you think?" Declan asked.
"I thought it was pretty cool. I also, see, heh, I was happy that the boys outnumbered the one girl. Who," he added diplomatically, "is a force of nature all by herself and doesn't need a posse behind her."
"You're damned right," Empy replied. "And what about Kevin?"
"See," Joss explained, "as a Pre-Vet major, they took us over to the Vet School during the first week. They told us, if we couldn't handle this one thing, then we might as well turn back and get some other major. There's plenty of things you can take at Cornell and they wanted us to be happy and feel like we were making the best choice. You know, all of that."
"What was that one thing?" asked Tommy.
"They showed us this elderly cat. It had multiple myelomas and it was suffering. Of course it's possible to heal at least a part of that, but that's expensive and difficult and the outcome isn't guaranteed. Plus that cat was about eighteen, heh, the same age as me, see? That's kinda ancient for a cat, and this had been an outdoor cat. They, uh, they euthanized that animal in front of us."
"How did people react?" Declan asked.
"Two girls quit on the spot. They just went over to the professor and they got really angry, that that would be done, in this day and age. I dunno what they're studying now. One guy got sick. A bunch of people were angry, or were saddened. I kinda just channeled Dad, I guess. I stayed stoic throughout it. But it did affect me. I remember going back to the dorm and being unable to eat or get any studying done. I contacted the professor and I asked her, see, I asked, because I thought I was too affected. I asked her if I should continue. I love the idea of becoming a vet, but I wanted to know if she thought it would be too difficult for me."
"What'd she say?" asked Empy.
"She said I would become a better veterinarian then, that I shouldn't be so affected that I can't function, but that I should be affected enough that I can feel real empathy with the owners, you know, the people who are really going through it, and are losing a family member."
"What do you think about Kevin?" asked Neil.
"Well," Joss chose his next words carefully, "I can't say as I even knew the name of that cat. I'm not even so sure that it had a name. I can't even recall its gender. I, I love all of you and that means, by definition, that I love Kevin, too. But I can't help thinking that we can treat a nameless cat a lot better than we can treat him – at least sometimes. Makes me wonder how I should feel at all."
"Joss," Neil asked, "why aren't you in class, anyway?"
"I got the same reaction as I did to that cat," their elder brother explained, "I wonder what it means."