Little personal note - condolences to all people that had ever lost somebody in a plane crash... I am sorry guys, so so much. My thoughts are with you. Now more than ever. :'o((

A/N - Episodes mentioned - The Sentinel, Meridian, Revelations, Redemption, Descent and tiny little reference to Frozen

Chapter 2 – Apology

Daniel knew that he was supposed to go home and try to get some sleep but there was something he had to deal with first. As he knew Jack, he would still be in the gym or either hiding somewhere. Luckily for him, he had already found all Jack's hiding places.

He really needed to talk to him.

After his years in the SGC he had already figured out what to bring when he wanted to talk to Jack. So on his way he stopped by the commissary and picked two bowls of jell-o and slice of pie. Everybody knew that Jack liked pie. Not so many people on the other hand could tell that he had also fallen for jell-o. It was one of those things.

Everybody had these things that would help to deal with a particularly difficult mission. And Daniel knew that this one, to Lantona, was a difficult one. Losing SG-9, getting caught and almost killed by the jaffa, the whole communication fiasco and two other people dead could be considered as a very difficult mission. Not to mention some obvious personal issues that had resurfaced and remained unspoken of. Luckily they managed to save the planet but they had lost all the possible contact. On their way home they had to promise not to ever come back. And this time they all knew that this promised would be kept.

Daniel sighed. He so didn't want to think about all that. There was one thing, much happier thing, to be dealing with now.

He found Jack at the third possible place. He closed the door behind himself and without saying a thing just sat down into the corner next to him. The old bed moved strategically so they could prop up their feet on it was a good idea. Daniel noticed the yo-yo placed in his friend's hand and had to grin a bit despite all the odds. Some things about Jack O'Neill were just … so damn crazy. But he had to admit, they all had sort of grown on him. Jack was his best friend.

Now he had to smirk. Who would have thought, huh? But it was the truth. Of course that he had other friends but Jack was the best friend. Daniel knew that it was the same for Jack and he also knew that this simple fact meant something. Jack was not the guy to have best friends. And yet here he was. And yes, he could doubt it… after all he would most probably never come to him to talk or something like that… but here he was.

Daniel knew where to find him, he knew what to bring him and he knew that he would be there with his yo-yo, staring at the wall, at the small strip of light coming from the little space above the door. He offered him the jell-o and Jack took it without saying a word. He knew he didn't have to say anything.

Jack was a private man. And sometimes he needed a little place to hide. Daniel had discovered them all long ago. And he knew that Teal'c knew about them as well. Luckily the big guy would just wait and then confront him somewhere else. Daniel used to be asking questions, he used to be trying to get him to talk… but not anymore. He would just be there and they would just sit and stare together, play with yo-yo, sometimes play cards and sometimes they would just leave the mountain, get a beer and so… It actually felt good to have a friend.

Sometimes it was difficult to have Daniel as the best friend. There were things Jack didn't want him to understand or to know at all. It used to feel strange but not anymore. Now he was able to admit that he cared for the archeologist that used to drive him crazy. Well he was still driving him crazy. Anyway, somehow Daniel had understood that there would always be things that Jack would never admit, say out loud or share with him. And he could name it only as overprotective. But it was actually cute. Jack was glad that Daniel had stopped asking questions about those things. It was getting harder and harder to stay silent and not to confess.

Then there was Carter. Thinking about Carter would always end with headache, heartache and desire to run, get drunk, resign and do something stupid and reckless. He knew that she knew about his hiding places as well. She most probably knew even about the only one Daniel hadn't managed to find so far. Jack knew she knew. Somebody had miraculously disabled the camera in there and also updated his access code to the panel. But she had never followed him there. She knew him that well.

Being here in this room meant that he hadn't been in such a desperate need of some solitary. No, he knew that he was just being stubborn and himself. Besides sometimes Daniel would need to talk… then he would usually try to find him, get him to talk and then end up talking himself. So Jack was actually hiding in the sake of their friendship.

He smirked then, laughed a little. It was incredible what his strategic military head could sometimes come up with. Really. He decided to blame it on the time he was spending with scientists. And aliens.

"So… how late it is?"

"Don't know."

"Don't know?"

"Actually, don't care…"

"Actually… me neither."

"Listen, Jack… there's one thing I wanted to talk about."

"Work related?"

"Sorta…."

"Sorta? What kind of answer is that?"

"It's about Sam…"

"Daniel, I swear, if you are going to ask anything about…." And he would never understand where that had come from. Luckily, Daniel didn't let him finish.

"Nope."

"What?"

"It's about her birthday."

"Birthday?"

"Yep."

"Oh…. Yeah, birthday."

"I know there's still time to plan everything… but I talked to Cassie and she had this amazing idea about a birthday party."

"By birthday party you mean actual birthday party or are we talking about some movie-marathon, lots of eating and desk games … oh and cards?"

"Where's the difference?" He asked, big smile on his face.

"You are a bad influence."

"Tsss… look who said that…" Daniel shot back. And Jack had to admit, he was right.

"So… you are planning a birthday party?"

"Yes. We don't want anything big because … well she doesn't like that. Maybe Jacob will be able to make it, he, of course, doesn't know yet, but … you?"

"Me?"

"Yeah, you wanna know what it is so you can join us?"

"Okay Daniel, fill me in. But if your words have more than four syllables…"

"Smartass…"

Jack tried to pretend being offended but couldn't actually keep it up. Soon they were talking quite easily about the planned birthday party. They had lots of time to finish everything. And it would be pretty good in the end. Jack knew that Carter would be thrilled about some things and he would have to try to talk his friends out of some…. cause it was obvious that she would hate those. But he had time to take care of that.

He thought that it would be all but Daniel had another question prepared for him.

Daniel knew that Jack would most probably just shrug it off and leave him there but maybe he would be lucky and Jack would give him an actual answer. Well, he could hope. He wasn't stupid. He knew about all those small things Jack had done through the years. He knew about the flower he had given Sam the year ago.

Well he had been surprised back then, sure. While they were leaving the planet, one of the locals had stopped him and asked him about the real reason why the flower should be named after the blonde woman. Daniel had really difficult time trying to explain. As he knew Jack, he had been thinking about something while suggesting they should name it after Sam. Then he took a look and saw them standing there together, hands resting on the guns clipped to their vests, talking. Jack said something back then and Sam grinned at him. And then he understood. And so he told the man about the resemblance between the color of the flower and eyes of one certain person.

He was surprised to see SG-4 bringing the flower among other samples back that Friday. But he could only wait and see what the outcome would be. And then he noticed the flower in Sam's house and could only smile. Jack could sometimes be really cute.

So he knew for sure that Jack had already figured out what to give her for her birthday this year. He just wanted to know what!

"Any ideas yet?"

"For?"

"What to give her, Jack."

"I'm not sure… what are you guys planning?"

"Hmmm so let's see… Teal'c said something about a surprise."

"Hmph…"

"I know… well, Cassie and Janet are planning on something girly… guys from the lab want to give her some new tools and one of the things she's missing to finish the bike she's sorta building."

"That's nice."

"Yeah, I agree. I didn't have a chance to talk to Jacob yet. And General Hammond suggested that I should keep my nose out of his presents."

"They got you."

"I know."

"So what do you have for her?"

"You remember the day on P2 … something when we talked about the childhood stories? She said she used to have this fairytale book."

"Yeah, she told us some of the stories… whatever was in that drink made us talk a lot."

"Don't remind me… " And Daniel had to feel a bit embarrassed again. Telling the guys about some of the not so pretty things from his childhood and high-school years was very … humiliating. Truth, they were talking about practically the same things but geeez….

"So I found the book. It's in the edition she had talked about… with the original cover and the ornaments around the page numbers."

"Wow, Danny… that's pretty good! She's gonna love that one…"

"So what do you have for her?"

"Nothing special…"

"You haven't forgotten, have you?"

"Of course not!" And they both knew that.

"So?"

"It's not that easy, Daniel."

"Of course it is. She is your friend. She has birthday. You give her a present."

"Not the one I would want to…" Jack uttered just like that, silently. But Daniel had heard him. He knew how to push his friend's buttons by now… hopefully Jack would just tell him.

"Look I had a present for her, okay? But I can't give it to her."

"I wasn't asking."

"Yeah… sure…" and the irony there was palpable. He wasn't asking very loudly, huh?

"Why can't you give it to her?"

"Come one… you know how it is."

"Celebrating birthdays must be okay even with the Air force rule book."

"Daniel…"

"Sorry…."

"Nah, that's okay. Look, I think I have an idea. But I gotta think it through."

"You're opting for secret surprise present and officially acceptable one again?"

"What? How do you…?" He was really shocked.

Daniel didn't even bother with answering. The look he was giving his friend was speaking for itself. Yeah, he knew him that well. Jack could only suppress the grin then. Of course Daniel had figured it out. Hopefully he hadn't figured out the rest of it.

They knew that they should get up and leave the room before somebody would notice the door being unlocked, slightly opened and what more, anybody could hear them. Jack finished his pie and silently they left the room. Even secret base could have a secret hiding place. Yep, it was good.

At home Jack had to think about it, of course. Finding the originally planned present hidden among his very private things made him go visit places in his mind he hadn't visited in a very long time. Why everything had to be that complicated?

He knew that they had agreed that till the war would be over, they would stay like this, try to keep the status quo in place. They knew they had to be careful not to slip. Not because their careers and lives would be at stake but more because slipping would mean losing sanity and it would be like tasting something that had been forbidden since … ever.

So he put the box back where it belonged and went to his living room. He had a phone call to make. He had a friend to call and a favor to ask. Hopefully he would manage. He had to. It was about Carter's birthday after all!

"Montgomery."

"Hey, it's Jack."

"Hey! How are you?"

"Fine, can't complain."

"Not even about your knees?"

"Naaah, not even my knees."

"Wow, that's new…" His friend could tease him as well as Jack could tease him back. Old friends would usually have this ability.

"I wanted to ask you to do me a favor."

"Hmm… what can I do for you?"

"I need your help, your skills and talented hands."

"Huh... what for?"

"Present..."

"You know, I'm pretty busy but you know that I can always find time for you."

"It's for someone special, someone I care about." And it surprised him how easily he could admit it. It made him smile.

"In that case I will find time for you." He knew that if Jack was saying 'someone I care about' that it had to be something... somebody important to him. And he was his friend so of course he would find time to help him out!

"There's no rush..."

"So… you're gonna stop by?"

"Saturday okay?"

"Sure thing. Should I tell Kate to bake the raspberry pie you like so much?"

"Tell your lovely wife that I will bring her the supplies she asked about last time."

"She's gonna be thrilled."

"Yeah… and she still can bake the pie…"

They ended the phone conversation with few other jokes, both at ease, as old friends could be. Jack knew that Ryan would help him out. He had the perfect gift for Carter on his mind… he just needed a bit help with it. And Ryan would help. Especially when it was going to be such a challenge. His wife would try to get some information from him, he knew that. So as he saw it, he had time till Saturday to figure out what to tell her.

Everything went well and soon there was another mission planned. While leaving, nobody could have known that this mission would be one of those that would change their lives like forever.

At first it all sounded so beautiful. Some new technology, lots of old technology, unknown mineral and the name, Kelowna. As Daniel told them, Kelowna on Earth was a marvellous place. Irony, huh?

Losing Daniel was one deep cut in their hearts. The pain was too big for them to deal with it. Cassie was crying almost constantly. Janet was like a ghost, just existing but not living. She wasn't actually even surviving. She just was. Some of the people from the base had brought flowers to Daniel's office. Daniel Jackson was dearly missed.

Nobody could tell the difference between being dead and ascended. He wasn't there with them anymore and nothing could change that. So yeah, he was being missed, dearly, constantly.

Teal'c and Jonas could find help in talking to each other. It was one of the strangest things for them but it was surprisingly working.

General Hammond allowed them all some time before trying to bring the base back to full life. But with pain in his own heart it was difficult on him to be a grieving man, understanding commanding officer and in the same time running the whole base.

Sam was grieving at home or at her lab… or at Daniel's lab. The rumour mill was busy discussing her reaction to this whole thing. And sometimes they were getting pretty close. She didn't like it. She actually didn't know how to deal with everything. She needed help. She needed a friend to talk to. But Janet was a mess herself and Daniel was the reason of all that. She had to wonder about his relationship with Janet. Her reaction was … drastic. Sam knew how it felt to lose a friend. She knew how it felt to lose Daniel after all… She hated herself for not being able to be there for Janet when she needed her. But luckily they both knew the other needed space and time. It hurt anyway.

The worst case was Jack O'Neill. He was used to losing man. He was used to losing friends. He was used to losing family. All would leave scars on his soul and marks on his heart. He knew that, he had been put through all of that before. But losing Daniel was different. It was even worse than years ago. Back then it was terrible, thinking that he had let him out there and he died… thinking about fire and water and dead friend. But this was worse.

And so there was tension and awkward silence and many other things hanging in the air. Hammond knew that at this rate his base would collapse soon. His best people were so overwhelmed by emotions that he couldn't be sure about their abilities. Well of course he knew they would never fail him but he knew the feeling of losing somebody close to your heart.

He could see the struggle among those that used to work with Doctor Jackson the most. And frankly, it scared him to see SG-1 being in such a… shape. He knew that those people could overcome anything and everything, he had learned through the years to trust them, to rely on them, he knew that those four would always find a solution and surprise him. But suddenly one of the key elements was missing and he could see the pain and desperation settling in.

Sending SG-1 to a mission was both the best and worst possible idea ever. They managed before just right after losing Daniel but then they parted. There was no team night, nothing. They just parted. And it broke his heart all over again to see them like that. Then the whole Anubis thing happened and he thought that it would bring them closer. But then he got the news about certain canceled birthday party. And he knew that they still weren't okay. So sending them to another mission seemed like a good idea. He knew that with Jonas Quinn as the fourth member their chances were better than before but he also knew that his people were still having some serious troubles with accepting the death of Doctor Jackson. It still seemed strange to see them all geared up and ready to go without him. But somehow he could get used to seeing Jonas there with them.

Jack couldn't believe any of it. Having another alien on his team was crazy. Damn crazy. He knew that he was still fighting his own battles of pain and guilt over Daniel's … fate. And he was glad that the Ha'tak appeared on the orbit. Maybe it would help them all to be a team once again. They needed something to … become SG-1 again. He could tell that even after they managed to save the Earth, they still were more co-workers than friends. And he hated that. The tension was there, all the pretending and pregnant silent moments. He just really really didn't like that... so being on this particular mission seemed like a good thing to him. He ha deicided some time ago that he would do something to break the tension, that he would get his team back. There was no way he was willing to let it all go. He could picture it easily, in a few months, maybe half a year, they would parted definitely. And that was simply not an option. Not now. Maybe not ever.

But well, everything had to go wrong, huh? And suddenly he found himself in a very small space, trapped with Carter, with the water rising rather quickly. And he knew that they would die there. He could focus only on the woman there with him, about a million thoughts running through his head. One part of him was glad that she was the one to be there with him and the other one, much more powerful one, was pretty angry that she would die there with him. Especially like this. And especially now when he had finally gathered enough courage to fix the broken friendships.

Before he managed to process it, they were saved. And he just knew that this was yet another chance he was given by life to make things better and to settle some others.

Seeing Sam there and then with Jacob, he understood some other things. And this strange insight made him decided to do what he should have done a long ago. And truth to be told, even seeing Jonas made him understand and see some new possibilities and scenarios.

He knew he had hurt Carter, he knew that when he was supposed to help, he had failed her. And he knew that they were really close to dying practically on every other mission and after losing Daniel he just didn't want to leave any bridges broken. No, he would mend them and make things right. And then, maybe, just maybe, Carter would smile at him again. She was smiling, of course she was, but not as she used to.

Back on the base Sam went to her lab early in the morning. She couldn't sleep. Besides her dad had left them just few hours ago and she missed him. She had to be doing something. And there would always be something to be done in her lab. Actually, things seemed to be settling back into a routine, she felt calmer and more focused again. Time could really help and heal, right? And her lab would always be her place, her kingdom. She loved the place.

This time, however, she found a box and envelope there on her table. She knew she hadn't left it there before leaving... so somebody had to put it there. She closed the door behind her because she recognized the box then. It was the same design, the same blue, the same material as the one she had in one of her drawers in her bedroom, right next to her mom's jewellery.

She sat down and with shaking hands opened the envelope.

"Happy birthday! I haven't forgotten, don't worry. Really, I haven't. I was just being an ass… I'm sorry. Forgive me? Please? Make-up jello and talk later? Don't let me beg…"

There was no signature but she knew who had written that. There were not many people still writing by ink-pen. And his handwriting she would always recognize. She placed the note back to the envelope and took the box into her hand instead. There was a pretty ribbon over it. She unwrapped it and opened it.

"Oh my God… oh my… Holly Hannah!"

She didn't manage to suppress the grin and tears. She was just… surprised. Overwhelmed. Happy. She didn't know. She wanted to jump and run and scream and laugh and cry, all at once.

There was a bracelet in the box, carefully placed, shining and delicate. There were small pendants attached to it. And other ones were placed in the box. She could add some or take some away. It was perfect. There were little stars, similar to those she had gotten last year. So this bracelet was matching the earrings. It was beautiful. Breathtaking.

When she took a closer look, she gasped. Among the pendants there was one that looked like the symbol of Earth from the Gate. Then another one looking as her wings, one that looked like a bike and then the last one, carefully hidden, looked like a heart. All small and delicate, decorated with little stone. Her guess would be a diamond but she could have been wrong.

She felt silly but she just had to think about it. It all together could mean only one thing. There was only one man that would give her stars, heart, bike, symbol from the Gate and give her the chance to pick those she wanted to have there and also the chance to change them whenever she wanted.

Yeah, he was being an ass. But she could understand it. He was asking for forgiveness. And he was apologizing. He really cared about her deeply. She felt something warm spreading through her veins and something tugging at her heart.

She placed the box into her bag and took it home then. She just had to see the bracelet next to the earrings. She was missing words to describe the feelings and the view itself.

Few days later she was getting ready for the surprising mission to Antarctica. She was thrilled to go and yet… Jack visited her in her lab then.

"So, getting ready?"

"Yeah…"

"I thought you would be more thrilled…"

"Sorry to disappoint you, Sir."

"You? Disappoint me? Never." Yep, he still knew how to make her smile.

"It's just that…."

"It's Antarctica."

"Exactly."

"Don't worry… I have extra clothes packed, some extra supplies and I am not leaving without taking a GPS locator with me. I'm also planning on stealing some extra thermo-blankets…"

"Cool because I have already packed some more batteries, lights, some of ... my tools, oh and extra warm and large sleeping bag."

"I like the way you think, Carter."

"Yes, Sir..." She was grinning by then.

"So, we're gonna share, huh?" And the way he said it almost made her blush.

"But this time you're the one to climb up…"

"Ha…"

Well, she could make him smile as well. They had it in themselves, they could tease each other, have fun, whatever.

Sam wanted to finish another conversation. She took a deep breath and looked at her CO.

"By the way, Sir…"

"Yeah?"

"There might be no jell-o on Antarctica but well… what do you say about rain-check after we get back?"

She would never forget the way how his eyes lit up, the smile on his face becoming brighter and warmer. She made him happy then. And that made her proud… and happy as well. It scared her a bit as well but she was already used to that.

"And I know we're actually not talking about it but if it means anything, you are forgiven. And … I'm sorry as well... And thank you, thank you so much."

"Carter…"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

And she smiled at him and nodded. This was so damn difficult. Jonas found them standing there in her lab, grinning at each other, gazes locked, only few minutes later.

And so they left. Official as a team. Not juts co-workers but friends. In a team. They could all tell the difference. It was just there... and it felt good.

And Antarctica was cold and not pleasant at all. Nobody commented the extra luggage, only Jonas asked about it. But Teal'c in his own unique way told him not to think about it because that was the matter of past experiences and many private jokes between the two officers from the team. That confused Jonas even more. And made Jack and Sam blush and smile.

Before they got ill, before everything went to hell once more, Jack was enjoying the way his team worked together, he was glad and happy and especially the way Carter was smiling was warming his heart. Apology could really be powerful, huh? Little voice in his head added 'and diamonds, they can be powerful too' but he knew that in this particular case the apology was the key, not the present. The present was … just a little bonus. Lovely one indeed. But still... he was sure that the apology did the trick.

A/N: I hope it wasn't too much... I know they appeared rather fine after Revelations but I just figured they would be struggling a bit longer... besides I needed them to struggle, evil me... I just liked these particular episodes - they seemed to fit this chapter perfectly. Other opinion? Lemme know...

I know I know… there might be a question about the time. So in Sentinel, Meridian and Revelations there was nothing to suggest the time of year. In Redemption there was a hint but I decided to understand it as a weather from early December - mild winter, no snow... Ha :o) So then Sam could have had her birthday... and they could all be a bit off from the whole Daniel / Jonas thing. And then in Decent we can be anywhere past December - you can settle for early spring if you want to :o) And the small hint about Frozen - there is no time specification either so it can all fit, huh? :o)

And during writing this chapter I noticed some deep moments worth more than just few paragraphs. So yeah, I might be planning on writing more separately about some particular moments if you are interested - Jack/Daniel friendship, reactions to some of the mentioned missions... and I think there will be more wasted potential in the following chapters. So ideas are welcomed and dearly appreciated! :o)