Lily grew withdrawn from her mother and sister after that day. The cheerful, eager Lily had vanished. She did not mention her father. Despite this, it was clear that she took the longest to move on from his death.
As they now lacked a place to live, their mother took the initiative. She sold all of the ranch's animals and used the money to buy a small, rundown house in Neverwinter. From there she and Violet found work. Lily did not look for work, being told that she was too young by everywhere, so instead found another, less honorable way to help her family. And so it went on like this for over a year. Lily was now thirteen; Violet, eighteen.
Despite the fact that Lily was the only one who did not have a job, she was coming home with food almost every day, sometimes coming home with money as well. Her mother was often not home when Lily returned, or too preoccupied to question it. If she wondered, she did not voice her concerns.
Violet, however, did notice and did question. She suspected that she knew exactly where the food and money was coming from, and was not keen to let her little sister continue it. One day, nearly eighteen months after the death of their father, she decided to confront her sister about it.
"Lily," said Violet as her sister returned, carrying a bag filled with bread. "I need to talk to you."
"What?" asked Lily, walking past her to the kitchen. She took the bread out of the bag and moved it to the larder.
"Where are you getting all the food and money?" asked Violet.
"What does it matter?" asked Lily innocently, turning to face her sister.
"It matters because I don't want to hear that my baby sister is doing anything illegal," said Violet, narrowing her eyes.
"Then I won't let you hear it," said Lily dismissively, walking past her.
Violet grabbed her arm as she passed. "You're stealing this stuff," she said. It was a statement, not a question. "You need to stop. Now."
"Why should I?" demanded Lily. She had a defensive tone now. "It's keeping us alive, isn't it?"
"We can stay alive without stealing from other people," said Violet.
"Sure we can, but you can't pretend this isn't helping," pointed out Lily.
"It won't help us if you get in trouble for thievery," retorted Violet.
"But I won't get in trouble if I don't get caught," said Lily. "You're not going to report your own sister, are you?"
"N-no, of course not…"
"Then I fail to see the problem," said Lily. "You're working and helping in the only way you can. Nobody wants a kid around, so I'm helping in the only way I can."
"That's not the point," said Violet patiently. "Stealing is a crime, and if you get caught, you'll cause a lot more problems than you'll solve. I don't want to see you punished."
"I'm trying to help!" said Lily indignantly.
"Your help is misguided," said Violet. "Please, stop it."
"You can't tell me what to do!" shouted Lily.
At that moment, the door to the kitchen opened and their mother and a man entered.
"What can't your sister tell you to do?" asked their mother curiously.
"She's trying to get me to cook dinner tonight," said Lily without missing a beat. "But I don't want to because she's better at cooking than I am, we all know that."
Violet felt a twinge of worry at how readily the lie slid off her tongue. In an effort to move away from their interrupted conversation, she said, "Mom, who's this?"
"This is Oril," said their mother warmly, turning to him. "I met him at work. He's staying for dinner."
"Hello," said Oril, smiling pleasantly.
He was tall and muscularly built. He had dark eyes and darker hair. There was an air of comfort and strength about him. Overall, he looked like a nice person. However, there was just something about him that seemed off. Violet smiled at him and greeted him, but Lily simply looked at him. She couldn't figure it out, but there was something about him she didn't like. He finished greeting Violet and turned to Lily.
"And what's your name?" he asked kindly.
"Lily," she said in a tone that betrayed that she would really rather not have told him.
"Lily," said her mother sternly. "Be nice."
"Yes, ma'am," she said automatically. "It's nice to meet you," she added to Oril in very convincing sincerity. He smiled at her. She noticed his eyes stray to her hair.
"Such pretty red hair," he commented. "You got it from your late father, I presume?"
"Yes," said Lily, almost defiantly. Who did he think he was? He walks in there and almost immediately brings up her father? "Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go."
Lily pushed past the others and left the kitchen. She wasn't even sure what it was she had to do; she just wanted to get away from the kitchen. She was halfway to her bedroom when she stopped and thought about what she had just did. She knew she shouldn't have been rude like that. He clearly made her mother happy, and that was what was important. Still, there was just something about him that made her nervous. Maybe it was the fact that when he smiled at her, it looked more like a leer…
Dinner that night was a tense affair for Lily. While the other three seemed perfectly at ease, she couldn't help the feeling of Oril's eyes on her whenever she looked away. She felt exposed in a way. The way he questioned their old life before her father died, and her father himself, made her uncomfortable. She hid it as best she could, but was always grateful when her mother or Violet answered instead of her. Oril seemed politely curious, but each minute they spoke of the life they had left behind, her dislike grew. Every now and again she would catch him watching her, and he would quickly look away.
After what seemed like an eternity, Lily was finally excused. She immediately went upstairs to the room she shared with Violet and threw herself on her bed. After another hour or so, the door to the dark room opened and Violet walked in, sitting on the opposite bed.
"Are you awake?" she asked, softly in case she was not.
"Mhm," said Lily, pushing herself up and sitting to face her sister.
Violet lit the lantern on the bedside cabinet between their bed and said happily, "He seems nice."
"Mm," said Lily noncommittally.
"You didn't like him much, did you?" asked Violet softly.
"Not particularly, no," said Lily stiffly.
"How come?" asked Violet. "He was nice enough."
Lily hesitated. She was not sure if she wanted to confide in her sister. All of a sudden, she blurted out all the things that were bothering her. "I wish he hadn't talked so much about all we lost," she said. "And is it just me, or was he looking at me a lot? I tried not to notice it…"
"Well, he looked at all of us," said Violet. "That's what you usually do when you talk to people. You look at them."
"Violet, I'm being serious," said Lily.
"Well, yes, I suppose he did glance over at you a bit more often than the rest of us," she said. "But I don't see what your issue is."
"I didn't like the looks he gave me…"
Violet sighed. "Look," she said. "I'm truly sorry that you don't like him very much, but mom does. She's been all alone since dad passed away, and she deserves this. So, could you try to make an effort, for her?"
Lily nodded. "I know," she said. "I'm being silly. It's probably nothing to worry about. I'll just avoid him as much as I can in the future and maybe I won't have to deal with him too much."
As it happened, this plan was much harder to execute than it had originally seemed. Oril always seemed to be at their house, even when their mother was not. It was always a nasty shock when Lily believed she was alone in the house, and then she went downstairs to see Oril at the kitchen table. She also found it extremely hard to get away from him once he had cornered her. He always seemed to want to talk to her, and when he cornered her when they were alone he would flatter her extensively, telling her that she was beautiful and the like. Instead of their deisred effect, they made her want to get away from him. More than once she was tempted to point out that he was twice her age and dating her mother, but never did for her mother's happiness.
Completely ignoring her sister's warnings, which came quite often, Lily continued to steal. She got quite good at it very quickly, keeping guilt at bay by telling herself that this was to help feed her sister and mother, and that it was necessary for their survival. She didn't believe the latter part truly, but it helped her psyche to tell herself that. She knew very well that if she stopped taking food today, they would survive, just become a bit thinner than they already were.
Oril stuck around for several months. Lily's original unease around Oril had turned to fervent dislike, and a need to get as far away from the house as possible when he was near. About two months after Lily's fourteenth birthday, she and Violet received the news she had been dreading.
"We're getting married," said her mother excitedly over dinner.
"That's wonderful!" exclaimed Violet. "Congratulations!"
Lily looked down at her plate. Cold dread was gripping her stomach. She had kept quiet about her dislike for this man for months for her mother's sake, but she had always been hoping that they would break up. Now she had to deal with this stalker for much, much longer than she had originally intended.
"Lily?" asked her mother. Lily looked up at her. "Aren't you happy?"
"Y-yeah!" said Lily, forcing some enthusiasm into her voice. "It's great."
Lily felt rather than saw Violet glance at her quickly. She wondered if Violet knew how she was feeling. She couldn't identify why, but something that was undeniably fear was twisting her insides. She saw Oril look at her and their eyes met breifly. She felt another twinge of unease at his smile. Did no one else see his leer? She couldn't help but feel that one way or another, this was going to end badly.
"I guess you'll be calling me 'dad' soon, Lily," said Oril.
Something snapped inside Lily. "No," she said in quiet fury.
"Sorry?" he said, and Lily thought she could hear his polite façade crumbling slightly.
"No," she said, standing up. "I won't be calling you 'dad.' You may be marrying into this family, but you will never, never, replace my father!"
She walked briskly from the room and ran upstairs. She heard her mother apologizing for her in the kitchen, but that only made her angrier. This man deserved no apology. She hadn't mentioned her father since his death because it hurt too much, not because she wanted to forget and get a new one! Who did he think he was? She threw herself facedown on her bed and lay there fuming until she fell asleep.
The wedding was so small it was almost laughable. The four of them, the priest, and one or two others. The whole time, Violet stayed comfortingly close to Lily, who desparately wanted this event to be over. She had not confided her fears in Violet, and was regretting it immensely, especially because there wasn't a crowd to lose themselves in so she could do so.
"Girls," he said when the wedding was over. "Your mother and I want to be alone tonight. You'll understand, of course, if I ask you two to stay away from the house tonight."
"Of course," said Lily, eager for any way to get away from him.
"Have fun," said Violet. "Come on, Lily, let's leave them alone. Let's wander for a bit and then go to the inn."
"Done and done," said Lily, grabbing her sister's hand and pulling her along as she left Oril behind.
They did exactly that, wandering around Neverwinter together. Initially throughly enjoying spending the day with Violet, not to mention being away from Oril, as night fell Lily began to feel that something was terribly wrong. It happened very suddenly. One moment she was laughing with Violet, the next there was a horrible sinking feeling in her gut.
"Violet?" she finally asked after they checked in at the inn. "Do you feel that something…bad might have happened?"
"What?" asked Violet. "No, why?"
"I just feel like something might have happened," she said. "Do you want to…to go home and check and see if everything is okay?"
"Lily," she said in exasperation. "This is their special night. Let them be. Everything is fine, I promise. Don't you dare go out there by yourself," she added sternly, seeing the look on Lily's face.
"I wasn't going to," she said. "Sorry, I'm worrying for nothing…"
Violet fell asleep before she did. She lay awake until nearly midnight, trying to shake the feeling that something had happened. Eventually, however, the feeling got too strong. As much as she didn't want to, she had to go home. She had to see that everything was okay.
She kept completely silent so as not to wake Violet as she crept from the room, using skills she had picked up while thieving. As soon as she was outside of the inn, she started running. She didn't stop until she was outside her house.
The door was locked, but she picked it easily. She crept silently through the house until she got to her mother's bedroom door, which was cracked open a bit. She looked through the crack and let out a noise between a gasp, a scream, and a whimper.
Oril was standing over her mother, who was lying on the bed, holding a knife dripping with blood. The white sheets under her mother had crimson spreading over them. Upon hearing Lily's cry, Oril swung around. He walked over and pushed the door open, laughing as he saw Lily on the floor, as she had backed away so rapidly that she had tripped.
"Well, well, well," he said. "If it isn't my favorite girl."
"How could you?" Lily demanded, scooting backwards.
"How could I murder your mother in cold blood? Well, it was quite easy, really, I've been doing it for years," he said conversationally. "I pick a target, marry her, then I kill her and take everything she owns. You are exceptionally bright, Lily. You knew from the start that I was not to be trusted, but not even you could have suspected that I would do something like this. But herein lies the problem: I have a witness. I do like you, Lily, and I don't wish to kill you. However, what must be done…"
He held the knife out, pointing it at her throat. "Let this be an important life lesson to you: You can't trust anyone except yourself."
Lily swung her legs sideways and knocked his feet out from under him, causing him to fall heavily to the floor with a grunt of pain. She scrambled to her feet and ran as fast as she could, intent on getting as far away as possible as quickly as possible and alert someone, but as she reached the wall and started to turn, the knife hit the wall in front of her, inches from her face. She froze.
Before she could turn around, she felt a hand close on the back of her neck and forcefully push her down to the floor. She fell to her knees with her forehead pressed to the stone floor. She tried to struggle, but Oril had an iron grip on the back of her neck.
"Good news," he said. "I was going to break my personal code of not killing children, but now that you've pulled that little stunt, I don't have to break my code and I don't have to worry about you telling anyone."
"What are you talking about?" asked Lily, her voice an octave higher due to fear.
"I've just said that I don't kill children," he said. "I don't, however, have any issues with silencing women."
Lily felt him pull her dress up past her waist with his free hand. Icy terror was twisting her intestines and she began to struggle violently. She felt him grip the back of her panties and she cried out.
"Stop!" she cried. "Please, you don't want to do this, I'm only fourteen, I'm half your age!"
"That doesn't matter to me," said Oril, pulling up on the fabric of her panties a bit. "I've wanted to do this for awhile now. My only regret is that once you're a woman I will have to kill you."
"I'll scream," she said, her voice positively dripping with terror.
Oril laughed. "Scream all you want. No one will hear you and it's more arousing to me."
He pulled her panties down agonizingly slowly, ripping them off once she was exposed. Lily pressed her legs together, but in her current position it did nothing to hide herself. He moved his hand briefly from her neck to her mid-back, putting his full weight on it to keep her down, in order to get a better look at it.
"Haha. I can tell just by looking at you that you'll be the tightest I've ever had," he said. "You're not torn at all. I don't envy you right now."
Lily struggled as hard as she could, making small cries of terror. She heard the rustle of clothing behind her and felt his hand move back to the back of her neck. She began to plead.
"Please! No!" she screamed, tears filling her eyes. "Don't do this! Stop! I'll do anything, just don't do this!"
"I'd stop struggling right now if I were you," he said with a smile in his voice. He knocked her knees apart with his own. "It's going to hurt a lot more if you struggle."
"Stop! PLEASE!"
He thrust into her up to the hilt in one solid, piston-like movement. She wasn't even wet.
"AAAAAAIIIIIIIEEAAAAAHHHHH!"
It was the worst pain she had ever experienced. Pain beyond pain. It felt like she had just been ripped in two. There was no lubrication and she felt her passage tear as it pushed in as deep as it would go. Her scream echoed off the walls. She pounded and clawed at the floor, unable to relieve the pain in any other way.
"Damn, you are so tight," he grunted. "Try to get yourself wet; that'll make it more enjoyable for both of us."
"It hurts, it hurts, pull it out!" she sobbed, tears of agony and terror falling from her eyes onto the stone an inch from them.
To her shock, she felt him pulling out. This move caused her quite a bit of pain, but not as much as when he slammed back in hard.
"Eeeeeiiiahhh!" she screamed.
He thrust into her again and again, each one met with a scream. The rough movement was tearing her more. The pain was too much; she was going to pass out or die, she just knew it. She felt something warm rolling down her legs and she looked down as best she could. She got an upside-down view of her legs, liberal amounts of blood running down her inner thigh and dripping from between them. She also got a view of his legs and his movement, but quickly found that it was worse to watch and see it coming.
"Good girl," said Oril. "Do you feel that? It's moving more easily now. You're getting wetter by the minute."
"No!" she wailed, but she could tell that Oril was right; his movements weren't as rough as they had been before. Whether she was getting aroused or if her body was trying to protect itself from further injury, she didn't know, but she did know that the place where she had torn inside started to sting more. "Aaaaaahhhhhhhng!"
He took this as an opportunity to thrust into her as hard as he possibly could. She tried to struggle again but found with a stab of annoyance that he had been right again. Struggling hurt more. She could only wail and claw at the floor as he brutally raped her.
"I'm gonna cum," he suddenly moaned.
"Wh-! No! Not that! Not inside me! NOOO! KYAAAAAAAHHH!"
She felt him stop moving while he was deep inside and felt something burning hot coat the end of her passage. He pulled all the way out of her and she released one last whimper of pain. The hand on the back of her neck vanished. She shakily pushed herself up and crawled over to the wall, her groin protesting sharply at every movement. Using the wall for support, she pulled herself to her feet. Her hand connected to Oril's knife, still in the wall, and she grabbed the hilt without thinking, using it for support.
Oril was buttoning his pants back up. "Let me just say that you were probably the best I've ever had," he said. "A young, tight virgin with a beautiful screaming voice. If your father watching over you saw that, what would he think of you, you dirty little slut?"
It happened very quickly, and years later it was only a blur whenever Lily thought back on it. She remembered very vividly, in the years later, the scene three minutes after that quip. She was standing over Oril's corpse, the knife clattering to the floor from Lily's violently shaking hand. There was blood on her face from the spray, and blood coating her hands and arms up to the elbows like long, crimson gloves. Her dress was permanently stained all over. Tears were streaming down her face thick and fast, mixing with Oril's blood to leave red streaks down her cheeks. She fell to her knees and cried.
"Lily? I woke up and you weren't in the inn. Are you he – Oh, Gods!"
Lily looked up to see Violet standing at the end of the hall, staring in horror with her hand over her mouth. Lily had no emotion in her eyes.
"Mom is dead," she said hollowly. "He killed her, and he wanted to kill me too, so I killed him first." Fresh tears filled her eyes as the reality of this statement hit her. "I killed him, Violet," she whimpered. "I don't even know what happened, one minute he was hurting me, and the next minute he was dead and I was still stabbing him…"
Violet ran over and hugged her sister tightly, heedless to the fact that she was kneeling in a puddle of blood. She made shushing noises and said "It's okay," over and over.
"I'm a murderer," choked Lily, crying onto Violet's shoulder.
"You were defending yourself," said Violet softly. "Did he hurt you?"
Lily nodded against Violet's shoulder. "So much," she whimpered. "Violet, it hurt so badly."
"What did he do to you?" asked Violet gently.
Lily shook her head violently and let out a sob.
"Shh, shh, you're okay now," said Violet soothingly. "You gotta pull yourself together now. We're all we've got. Come on, get up. We'll get you to a doctor, and then we'll go far away from here. Come on. Get up."
Violet pulled Lily to her feet and took her hand, leading her on. She was so covered in blood that it was impossible to tell what was hers, but Violet immediately noticed that Lily was limping badly, with both legs. There was blood on both her thighs and there was a steady drip onto the stone below her. At first she thought he had cut or stabbed both her legs, perhaps so that she couldn't run, but then she noticed that the drip was coming from between her legs, and that there was some thick white fluid dripping out with the blood.
"He didn't," said Violet furiously. "He did NOT do that to my baby sister!"
Lily followed her gaze, and nodded dejectedly. "He forced my face down and took me from behind," she whispered. "It hurt so much…I thought I was going to die…I wanted to die…"
"I'm going to find him in hell and kill him!" spat Violet. "Did he tear you inside?"
Lily nodded. "I think so. There was one place inside that hurt worse than the rest and it feels like it's still bleeding," she said in a small voice.
"Here, lean on me," she said. She took Lily's arm and wrapped it around her shoulders. "We're getting you to the hospital."
As much as she hated that man, Lily did take one thing he said to heart: You can never trust anyone except yourself. You ever notice that she doesn't really trust anyone? Like trust trust anyone? Yeah, this one man is why. Trusted by her mother, and well, he knifed her and raped her daughter. That worked out well. Good call.
I'm going to hell for this scene. I'm going to the special circle of hell for thoroughly enjoying writing it. I am way too mean to my characters. One that sadistic note, horray for doggy style! The position which I thought would cause the most pain because you can go in the deepest with that one. And if anyone thinks I'm wrong and wants to correct me on that, I might need more lemon material x3 So tell me the name of the position and I guarantee I'll look it up.
It's kind of cute in a way. Lily became a Rogue to help her family. Old habits just die hard.
So if her first sexual experience was that bad, how did she become such a whore? Stay tuned. We may or may not answer that question in the next chapter. Probably not.
Speaking of whores, is it bad that I cannot picture her as a virgin? Like it was so hard to write the first chapter and the first couple pages of this one because she was still innocent and...un-Lily-like.