My Way, Chapter 2
Life comes from physical survival; but the good life comes from what we care about. - Rollo May
We haven't been speaking for very long, but Doug's already brought me over to show me his alarm system he's built. It's a bunch of bells all lined up together and tied together with some string, and he said they'll go off when someone's coming close to the inn.
These people here are lucky to have someone smart. Not that the others didn't seem smart, but... Still... "This is really nice," I say, smiling at him a little. I'm still scared, and I don't think I can really pretend to be happy at the moment.
These guys have a pretty great set-up. At least, compared to what me and Travis and David had... The wall that separates the inn from the outside, actual beds to sleep in inside, this big RV so that if something goes wrong they can leave, food, actual FOOD! Not a lot of it, but it's there...
"Thanks," Doug finally says, though he shakes his head a bit, "Anything I'd like to contribute needs batteries or tools I just don't have...I feel worthless on watch because I'm not wild about guns, and I just wish I was more helpful."
I frown a little. Did they not value intelligence here? "On watch?"
"Yeah. Every night one or two people sit on the RV and look out for walkers," He says, turning his attention back to the little system for a few moments, "Most of the time we don't see much of anything. Kenny, Lee and Mark try to thin out the number of walkers when they go hunting."
That makes sense, I guess. "Who needs to do the watch tonight?"
"Me."
The answer comes out a bit begrudgingly. I get it. I'm not really into guns either. "Could I join you then?"
I don't really know why I'd ask. I guess it just seems unfair that he'll be alone and with no one to talk to. He stops what he's doing and looks up at me, turning around and standing up and scratching his head in confusion, his light brown hair rustling gently at the touch of his hand. "I guess," He says, more surprised than against the idea.
"I mean, if they let me stay," I say in turn, looking anxiously over at the others. I see Lee helping that woman with David's leg. That woman...what was her name? Katjaa?
A weird name, but Benton is too.
"They'll let ya stay," He says, standing next to me and looking over as well, "Only Lilly and her dad don't want you two here, the rest of us'll ignore them. Besides, who would just abandon a teenager and his hurt teacher? How old are you, anyway?"
"Nineteen," I say. I didn't want to say I'd been held back a year when I was little, most people assume I'm stupid when I tell them. "How old are you?"
"Twenty-four."
Oh.
Well I was close.
We're sitting atop the RV now, at the back of it. Lilly's nearby at the front, on 'daywatch.' It doesn't seem like that big of a deal compared to 'nightwatch' which, I guess, is when you really need to look out. Her dad and that other guy Mark are building up the wall to keep the walkers out, and Lee and Kenny are talking a few feet away, occasionally looking over at the kids.
I don't really know for sure but I think that little girl Clementine was either abandoned or lost her parents, and kind of just clung to Lee when she found him. She doesn't really look much like him, but maybe he's her uncle or something. The boy's name's Duck and he looks a little older than her, maybe ten or eleven. He reminds me of myself when I was younger. He's Kenny and Katjaa's son. Looks a lot like Kenny.
We're sitting there watching Katjaa trying to help David. I think it's going well, but I can't tell. He doesn't seem to be bleeding anymore... "Do you think he'll be okay?" I ask Doug, who's sitting right next to me.
He shrugs a little, "I don't know," He said, "I would trust her to help me if I were in his position. But I mean, I know about computers and that doesn't mean I can fix a calculator..."
A few moments pass before he chuckles a little and adds "But I probably could!"
Even though it takes me a second to understand, it's a comfort. "He's my best friend," I hear myself muttering, "he's the only one left." And after a moment Doug puts his arm over my shoulder, I guess trying to help.
"Everything will be fine," he says, trying hard to reassure me that everything will, in fact, be okay.
We're quiet after this and simply watch. Lee goes over and starts to help Katjaa, who is...I guess...sewing the wound? I dunno, how do you fix an amputation? Just...sew it up?
Weird.
It's funny. If David hadn't gotten hurt and that girl - What was her name? Lilly? - and her dad didn't want us gone, I would be so excited about being here. Even with Travis gone.
...Wow, is that horrible of me? I mean yeah it'd be better if Travis had come. Of course it'd be better if Travis had come! But even with him gone, if these people were a little less... Angry, I'd be really happy.
Really though is that horrible of me? I was never really good friends with Travis, and even when it was only the three of us we weren't friends...
Whatever.
Some time goes by and we're just sitting there, but it isn't an uncomfortable quiet. It's the kind of quiet where you can think and glance around without wondering what the other person is thinking or worrying that they're bored. At one point the two kids came toward us, asking if I wanted to play with them.
They seemed so happy to have someone new nearby. The little girl, Clementine, drew a picture of me. The boy, Duck, holds a soccer ball and seems eager to play with an older kid.
Though his attention is quickly taken up by the fact that his mother is sewing up some guy's leg, and he goes closer to watch her. I see as he reaches out, like he's about to touch David's leg, and jump slightly along with him when she yells out "Kenneth James Smerton, what do you think you're doing?!"
Looking over at Doug it's obvious that he's a little startled too.
I've now learned a couple of things. One, Duck's named after his dad, and two, don't piss off Katjaa. She seems really nice, but I guess everyone who's nice loses it sometimes.
Duck turns away and looks back up at me, and I tell them I can't play right now. And they walk away, looking disappointed until Kenny and Lee agree to play with them.
And we're quiet again, until I feel Doug shaking me by the shoulder gently, pointing down toward Katjaa. She's standing there and waving a bit for me to come down, and isn't screaming, and he's not one of those...things... So...
So... is he going to be okay?
Doug jumps down first and I follow a moment after, walking over to Katjaa more slowly than I probably should have. "So...?"
I don't really know what my question was, so I don't finish it. I hear footsteps behind me and turn back to see Lee and Kenny standing there, the kids a few feet back. Lilly's still up on the RV, Mark and Larry still working on the wall. Mark looks over at me after a moment with a kind of grudging obligation, and after that I look back at Katjaa, who's said nothing yet. She isn't annoyed or anything and seems to understand. I like Katjaa, I'm glad that she's here.
"He's your teacher?" She asks, looking back at him.
"Yes," I say, pausing awkwardly for a moment and thinking about it, "Well no. He was my band director. But he's an English and History teacher."
As I think about it I realize how stupid that was. Who cares what subjects he teaches? What difference does any of it make?
But Katjaa doesn't seem to mind. She's smiling at me like a mom smiles at their kid or a teacher smiles at their embarrassed student. "How old is he?"
"Thirty-one."
"Is there anything wrong with him?"
"Well, his leg is missing." After another moment I realize what she means and shake my head, "No, not as far as I know..." He doesn't have any kind of disease or anything. That's what she meant, right?
I don't look at the others for a few moments and just look down, my face feeling like it's on fire and my stomach tying up into knots of embarrassment.
Stupid, stupid, stupid!
But they don't say anything, and I feel a kind of pity - or maybe annoyance - coming off of them. Doug puts an arm over my shoulder again like he had before, and he smiles a little, but I don't look at him for long, and just wait for Katjaa to say something.
"I can't really tell what will happen," she says, and as she speaks I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding in. "I've never had to do anything like this before..." She turns and shows us his leg. Or rather what was once a leg and was now a knee. It's bandaged up tightly, and the bleeding seems to have stopped, but I can't really tell. "It wasn't easy to seal the wound since it wasn't exactly done properly," she says, not in an unkind tone, "But the bleeding seems to have slowed."
So he's alive... He's alive. "Do you think he'll be okay?" I hear myself asking.
She pauses, looking back at him, "I don't want to tell you he will and get your hopes up, but-"
"But he survived the worst of it," Kenny says assertively, "Lee and I'll head into Macon tomorrow and when we look for supplies we'll try and find a pair of crutches."
I look back at the older man for a moment gratefully, and then to Lee, whose expression is a little more skeptical. "Ken," he says in the calm tone he'd tried to use when he first found us, "We don't know if this guy'll-"
"No. He's not gonna die." Kenny says, "He's gonna live."
And I'm grateful for those words.
Doug stays quiet, looking from David - who's still out cold - to Katjaa and back again, as if to make sure. Katjaa continues, "I've done the best that I can. Lilly told me that we can only use one bottle of painkillers for him if... Well, we can only use one. And no antibiotics."
"But without antibiotics he'll just get sick!" Doug half-yells in protest, not angrily but almost offended at the idea. Doug hasn't spoken up to the others about anything up until now, and it seems to throw the other two men off.
"I know," Katjaa said, "Some studies have shown that pouring sugar over a wound works just as well as antibiotics. We have two bags of that left, and it's not like we have anything to do with it. For now," she said the last part with a bit of a bite. "Ken, I need you to look for some more sugar when you go to town with Lee."
What? How on Earth does sugar...?
I guess it's better than nothing, right? At least he's alive. "What do we do now?" Doug asks.
Katjaa looks at us and back at David, "Get him onto one of the beds inside," she says, looking between me and Doug, as well as Kenny and Lee. Lee turns and calls out to Mark, who comes over to help too. "He probably won't wake up for a while, but if he does have him eat some sugar." I didn't question the reasoning and grabbed hold of him by one of his arms and started to carry him with the others, Clementine running ahead and opening the door to the nearest room.
And now here we are. David's asleep slash unconscious on the bed near the bathroom and I'm sitting on the one near the door. Doug sits next to me. It's dark out, and the lights in here don't work, so it's hard to see either of them.
"You should probably stay with him," Doug says, "I don't mind doing the watch alone."
"No," I say, too nervous to leave David - who's at least breathing - but not wanting Doug to go away, "Stay with me. Can't someone else take the nightwatch?"
He's quiet for a moment and turns to the door, stepping out and saying something to Lilly, who yells something I can't really understand. Then he's back. "I'm covered." He says.
And then he stays with me, and we wait, sitting next to one another in silence. And I guess that he didn't mind watching David, because eventually I fall asleep. I wake up at one point with a nightmare - David was dead, Travis was gone, I was alone...
But I see Doug sitting there. And I'm okay again...
Doug...
Why didn't everything go right?