A/N: Well, here we go. The 3.02 post-ep. Seriously guys, 3.02, shippiest episode of the show for me. Because I am strange. I'm not sure exactly what I think about this one. It feels almost erratic, in a way, uncontrolled. It's certainly not exactly what I was going for, but I'm also not sure how to change it. Hope it's alright.

xxxxx

Family, extended and unexpected

xxxxx

Patrick Jane parted from his criminally-minded, though happily non-murderous, brother-in-law at the edge of the cemetery. Danny drove off to flee fraud charges, Jane himself to brood over his family's deaths. Not because he wanted to exactly, but because it was inevitable. He didn't actually need another reminder obviously, and the graves of the two women he'd loved certainly didn't make him feel closer to them. But being confronted by the headstones for the first time in years inevitably conjured up even sharper feelings of guilt and inadequacy.

He was relieved to leave the cemetery, and was secretly happy that its sombre atmosphere combined with a conman's inadequacy at expressing genuine emotion allowed him to escape another tête-à-tête with the man who was the closest thing to a little brother Jane had ever had. He and Danny may have reached an unspoken understanding in the end, but Jane wasn't quite up to more conversation. Not even after Danny tried to make him feel better by reminding him that men like the two of them, master con-men raised in a world apart, shouldn't feel guilt.

Only one problem with that theory though. His wife, the very woman whose death he felt guilty over, hadn't wanted him to be that type of man. The two of them had tried to flee that life. Unfortunately the cons had clung to him so hard that not even she could shake them off in the end. It wasn't something Danny would understand, even if he ever bothered to open up his ears wide enough to let Jane tell him about it.

Instead Jane watched Danny drive off to disappear back into the underworld. Then it was time to wend his own way back to the CBI building, where he got to play the clever fox trying to camouflage himself in amongst all the loyal protective sheepdogs, similar in some ways, but never quite the same. He passed the bullpen quickly, not wanting to attract attention, and headed straight up the attic stairs. He needed to think.

Jane tried to turn his attention to the details of the all-too-familiar Red John case, hoping to use the images of his family's graves to spur him on. But memories of the events of the past few days kept taking precedence in his mind. Racing with Lisbon to see who could finding Danny first, abandoning Lisbon with Pete and the elephant, finding the body in the dark office-building, the many times Lisbon'd caught up with him (or nearly caught up with him), his fake death, having to put Danny's fate into her hands in the end...

Lisbon certainly hadn't let him down there either. She'd stuck to her side of the deal to the letter. Actually, she hadn't just helped clear Danny of murder; she'd turned the other way on the fraud charges as well. He'd just assumed Dan could get off on those. The grounds were weak anyway. But as soon as Lisbon'd started speaking Jane'd known what she was up to. She was going to let Danny walk away. For some reason Jane wasn't surprised. But then the question became, why wasn't he? Why had she let Danny go so readily?

She was the cop after all. They were both always verbally making that distinction clear. "Oh, I'm not a cop." "He's just a consultant." "No one is calling you a hero." She was the one who tackled and handcuffed suspects, who cared about the law. She was the one who lived by that code. But she let Danny walk away. Had he secretly always known that she would?

But more to the point, why had she let Danny go? Danny was nothing to Lisbon, and she was already out of favour with Detective Reese, and the rest of the Sacramento PD. Sure she didn't actually need to, but she was the one who was always saying they needed to cooperate with local authorities. Why not get back some good-will by turning Dan over to them? Besides, Danny was hardly likely to walk the straight and narrow from now on. He was almost certain to re-offend. Lisbon knew that. Part of Jane's brain suggested it was for him. But Lisbon didn't need to do that sort of thing for him. Forget Danny's relationship with Lisbon, what was Jane to her really anymore?

Her teammate, maybe a friend, former lover, (though who knows what that meant). He was a man who'd lied to her more than once, who was still lying to her. He'd saved her life sure, but she'd saved his way more times. She owed him nothing. He almost certainly owed her on any type of balance sheet imaginable.

Yet Danny had walked out of that house without even a hint of a hindrance.

Why?

Jane sat up suddenly. The question was gnawing at him now. There was only one way to unravel it. And it couldn't be done alone in the attic.

He wondered if Lisbon was still in her office. It wasn't that late. It was certainly possible.

Jane wandered downstairs past the rest of the SCU bullpen where only Van Pelt sat, finishing up some report or other. He didn't disturb her, heading directly towards his real target.

He was slightly surprised to see all the lights were off and the blinds were closed in Lisbon's office. It seemed the team leader had gone home for the night at something approaching a reasonable hour. So much for sharing a cup of tea with Lisbon on her couch while he teased out of her why she' d let his brother-in-law flee so easily.

Jane frowned. He realized he'd actually been looking forward to that, for several reasons. He supposed he could always see if she was at home (and where else would she be at this hour if she wasn't at the office?). But that got... complicated. Sure, he and Lisbon were still friends. He'd already considered the benefits of cultivating a real friendship with her. He'd also already spent the odd evening on her couch, even since the dissolution of their previous... understanding. But it was always a bit awkward. It was different, not uncomfortable exactly, but strange. Like there was something out of place.

And when he did end up outside her door it was usually for a better reason than, "Want to have a cup of tea?"

He was sure she'd let him in; what he wasn't sure of, was what it meant.

Jane shook his head slightly. But why should it be complicated? She popped up to the attic to chat about personal-ish things from time to time. Why couldn't he drop by her house just to talk? She was always trying to get him to talk. She might even like it.

Knowing her she was probably already worried about him anyway. This might ease her mind a little.

His resolution made, Jane slipped from the building without a backwards glance, afraid that if he paused for a moment he might change his mind and skulk back up to his attic to hide.

xxxxx

Despite his utter confidence that Lisbon would let him into her home, Jane was still vaguely nervous as he knocked on the door (though he couldn't have said exactly why). He'd come here before, when he was desperate for human contact. But this felt different. He wasn't coming because he was he'd become temporarily disgusted with lying alone in an attic or because he was frustrated over Red John.

He'd come because he wanted to have tea with a friend. He did want to ask her something, but he also wanted tea. He was even armed with cookies. Shortbread, which always seemed to go particularly well with tea. Lisbon liked shortbread; he liked tea. It was perfect.

Before he could think too hard about anything else her door opened and he was faced with Lisbon herself. She looked confused but also a bit relieved by his presence. He'd been right, she had been worried.

"Jane?" she asked. "What are you doing here?"

Jane smiled a lazy smile, pleased that her tone was more surprised and amused than accusatory. "I thought you might like some shortbread," he told her, holding up the bag. "And I thought I'd come see how you were doing," he added.

Lisbon tilted her head in mild confusion. "You thought you'd come see how I was doing?" she asked dryly, her tone pointing out the absurdity of the statement given the details of their last case.

Jane froze momentarily. For some reason he hadn't quite expected to be called on his excuses, hadn't expected her to, however indirectly, point out that if he was showing up at her door for the reason he said, it was a change. He smiled again, but it was a second too late, and they both knew it. The silence needed to be filled quickly, before awkwardness set in. "I can't stop by just to talk?" he asked playfully, determined to turn the conversation at least for a second, from himself.

This time it was Lisbon's turn to hesitate. Then suddenly, she smiled, dipping her head slightly. "Of course," she said. "Come on in."

"Thank you Lisbon," Jane said cheerfully; now that he was actually across the threshold he felt the worst was somehow over. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

Lisbon raised an eyebrow and gestured significantly to the black track pants and baggy tee shirt she was wearing.

Jane grinned and nodded, acknowledging the point. "Thought I'd better at least check," he admitted. "Out of politeness if nothing else."

"Because you're always one to observe the social niceties?" she asked.

"I'm as capable of observing foolish social morays as anyone else," Jane reminded her.

"But you often don't," Lisbon retorted. "Making people suspect an ulterior motive when you do."

"Just have a cookie, woman," he said, his tone amused. "I don't suppose you have any tea to go with it," he added casually.

Lisbon huffed, but did take a cookie. "Ah, the real reason for your visit comes to light."

"Yes Lisbon," Jane said sarcastically. "I dropped by expressly to con you out of a cup of tea. because I couldn't get it anywhere else. Not at one of the two hundred coffee places I passed on my way here, not in the break room of the CBI where I came from, not even in my own house."

"I thought so," Lisbon said with a grin.

"Does that mean you're going to give me tea then?" Jane asked.

As if on cue Lisbon's kettle whistled.

"Well, that's a little creepy," Jane said after a brief pause.

Lisbon rolled her eyes and padded across her kitchen. "I wanted a hot drink myself, and was actually just making tea before you dropped by," she explained. "Chamomile okay?" she asked. "I don't think caffeine at this hour is such a good idea, at least not for me. I'll never get to sleep."

"Chamomile would be lovely, Lisbon," Jane assured her.

Lisbon sent him another smile before turning to prepare the tea. She wondered why Jane was really sitting in her apartment that evening. Oh, she was sure part of it was because he just wanted to talk; someone like Patrick Jane who was used to being the centre of attention must get awfully sick of sitting alone in an attic. But Lisbon was also sure that a desire for company and conversation wasn't the only reason he was here. She'd have to be an idiot to think that it was. And he'd paused when she'd called him on it, even though she'd done it playfully.

Besides, his brother-in-law had just been cleared of a murder charge.

The last few days had been full of constant reminders of her consultant's old life, old friends at the carnival, old issues with Danny, fresh guilt over his wife. Lisbon knew she didn't know the half of it. She wasn't sure that she wanted to. All that she knew for sure was that, now that the case was closed, she was no longer the adversary in trying to find Danny, no longer being avoided by her consultant, no longer 'Pepper' to be abandoned at the circus at will. She was Lisbon again, friend, boss, maybe one of the few people Jane trusted a little, even if she couldn't hope to ever rise to the status of someone he really considered family.

But maybe that didn't matter. He was in her apartment now.

In the end he'd chosen the new life, not the old. Lisbon supposed she could take some comfort in that. She would have to, were it not for the fact that Red John loomed in the new life. She knew without having to be told that the serial killer was the driving reason that Jane did what he did, not anything else. She'd tried to explain to his old friends, but they hadn't believed her. And why should they? Who would? Not when Jane was so good at putting on a mask.

So why was he here? Did he really want to talk? The idea was surprising. She was unlikely to be given details about the Jane/Ruskin family connections. What snippets she'd heard earlier had already told her more than she'd ever hoped to know.

What then?

Was he looking for... for comfort? And if he was, what kind exactly? She was terrible at refusing Jane, but she was getting better. Especially when it was for his own good, or even for hers. She couldn't afford to take a step backwards now. Besides, falling into old patterns tonight wouldn't help anybody.

Not when things were as undefined between the two of them as they'd ever been. She'd offer her friendship, her support, as she always did. But she couldn't go any further, even if she... even if he...

Well. It didn't matter. It wasn't a viable option right now. Maybe not ever again.

Instead she decided to keep things light as she carried a pair of cups over to the couch, and handed him one before sitting in the chair opposite him. "I suppose I should be flattered," Lisbon told him with a grin, amused when Jane looked at her in mild confusion. "You don't come down from that attic for just anyone," she explained.

Jane shook his head slightly. "I'm not that bad, Lisbon," he assured her, though he was beginning to wonder if maybe it was. "Don't let it worry you."

"You're half-living in the attic of the building where you work, Jane," Lisbon exclaimed. "Of course I'm worried."

"Is that why you're always coming up to visit me then?" Jane asked.

Lisbon frowned briefly. That question wasn't light, for all that his tone was. That sounded like he was fishing. The only question was, why and what for exactly? Lisbon shook herself and answered him, "I told you, sometimes I feel like playing board games."

"Of course," Jane replied.

"And everyone needs a break," she continued.

"Naturally."

"Plus, you have good chocolate up there," Lisbon finished. "Rigsby'd be up there in a second if he knew."

Jane smirked. They both knew that he kept the chocolate up in the attic for her alone. And if Rigsby ever did venture up, Jane would never offer the man any of Lisbon's favourites. The consultant took a sip of his tea, watching her over the rim of the cup. She seemed almost nervous. Well, maybe not quite nervous, but not quite at ease either. She was probably wondering exactly why he was there, what he expected of her. He didn't expect, or want, anything she wasn't willing to give. He realized that while he'd love answers to a couple of questions, he could content himself with sitting and talking to her over a cup of tea for an hour or so.

On the other hand, if she was willing to talk about Danny...

"It's been a strange case," Jane said after a moment.

Lisbon lowered her tea in surprise. "It has," she agreed, wondering where he was going with this. Because whatever he was leading up to, Lisbon was sure he wasn't making idle conversation. She was probably about to find out exactly why Jane was in her apartment with his shortbread (which unsurprisingly was of the melt-in-your-mouth variety).

"I hadn't ever expected to see Danny again," Jane admitted.

"Why not?" Lisbon asked softly.

He looked at her gently. "You know why," he told her, his tone non-accusatory.

"I can guess," she admitted. "I'm also guessing that you don't want to talk about it." She was surprised he'd told her even that much.

Jane hesitated. Did he want to talk about it? Maybe he did. Just not right now. "Not really," he said. "At least I don't think so." Lisbon was startled by his uncertainty. Maybe she really was wrong about his reasons for being in her living room. She let him continue." Still, it was strange," Jane added. "He looked good."

"Minus the whole murder suspect thing, of course," Lisbon interjected.

Jane smirked, "Ah, but he wasn't guilty. Danny has a knack for getting out of the worst of the trouble he gets himself in," he murmured.

"Family trait," Lisbon remarked.

Jane winced. "Most of the time," he agreed.

Lisbon didn't say anything, knowing all to well what he was thinking.

"Of course," Jane added more cheerfully. "This time he had a little help getting out of a spot of bother."

Lisbon scoffed. "A little help?" she asked incredulously. "Jane, without you concealing him we'd have had him in an interrogation room hours earlier."

"Where you'd have never gotten anywhere near the truth out of him," Jane countered, smiling when she didn't object beyond a scowl. "I am sorry about all that Lisbon," he added. "I'm sorry that you got caught in the middle. Again."

Lisbon shrugged. She expected it to a certain extent now. At least this time he had a better excuse than he usually did. "You did what you had to," she remarked. "He's family. I get it." She really did. And Danny Ruskin, a con man and a fraud was always going to be the type of person Jane considered family. That's just the way it was.

Jane frowned. He didn't like something in her tone, though he couldn't quite put his finger on what it was exactly. "I did..." he said slowly. "But Lisbon... I..."

"Don't worry about it Jane," she repeated.

He grabbed her wrist suddenly, searching her eyes.

His concern surprised her. She softened. "It's fine," she told him quietly. "I get it. He's your brother."

"Brother-in-law," Jane muttered, releasing her hand. He wasn't sure what he wanted from her, what he expected to see, or what he expected her to say. He wasn't sure what she thought. And though that bothered him, he wasn't about to ask. It probably wasn't flattering, and hearing her tell him how much she expected him to simply disregard her feelings might just break him tonight.

"Whatever," Lisbon said with a wave of her hand. "A close family member. You did what you felt you had to."

"So why'd you do what you did then?" Jane asked.

Lisbon paused mid-sip of tea. "What?" she asked.

"Let him walk away," Jane clarified. "You let Danny walk away and we both know it. I... I don't understand... You certainly didn't have to. He's not your brother-in-law after all."

"Obviously. I don't have a brother-in-law," Lisbon said dryly. "Nor am I likely to ever have one."

"Then why?" Jane asked tenaciously. "There was nothing in it for you personally. You didn't know him. I know you like giving people the benefit of the doubt, helping people out. But you have to draw the line somewhere. Besides hard as fraud may be to prove, we both know Danny was guilty of it."

"Jane..."

But Jane pressed on. "It's not like he was your fam..." he stopped speaking abruptly. The incompletely spoken family hung in the air between them.

Lisbon shuffled awkwardly in her chair, nibbling on a shortbread cookie as an excuse to occupy her hands (and her mouth).

Once Jane managed to get his mind working again, it started jumping in so many directions at once that he almost couldn't deal with all the questions that arose. Did she think of Danny as some sort of extended family of her own? She'd told him recently that he was part of the CBI family, implying he was part of her family. Did that somehow make Danny family by extension? Because if that was the case, and her little speech about the CBI, and cops being a family hadn't been just for effect, to help drag him out of his recent reclusive tendencies... If she'd genuinely meant that... If he meant that much to her...

Jane's breath caught in his throat.

He stared at her, uncaring what she might see on his face. Lisbon met his eyes briefly before hers flicked to a picture on the bookshelf. Jane followed her gaze. He'd seen the picture before, though he'd never paid all that much attention to it. It was of a young girl, surrounded by three even younger boys, all dark haired, all smiling. Lisbon and her brothers. He jerked subtly in his chair.

He might not know much about Lisbon's relationship with all three of her brothers, but he knew enough. He knew that she'd spent her teenage years protecting them and bailing at least one of them out of trouble. She probably still did from time to time, albeit from much farther away. Had the troubled Danny Ruskin, a man who'd lost his own big sister too early, remind her of the younger Lisbon siblings? Was Danny another mildly troublesome family member who needed rescuing? Did she sympathize with Jane in that respect? Was that why letting Danny go had seemed so second nature to her?

"Lisbon..." he whispered.

She got up quickly. "I need more tea," she said. "Do you want some?"

"Sure," he agreed after a second.

Lisbon nodded, taking a minute by the teapot to collect herself. She walked over with the still half-full pot to fill up his cup.

"Thank you Lisbon," he said, meeting her eyes and holding them.

She nodded quickly. Then she settled back in her chair.

"Will you tell me why?" Jane asked quietly.

She looked up. "Does it matter?" she asked after a moment.

"I think so," Jane said seriously.

Lisbon frowned. "Why?"

Jane searched for the right words, "Because... because I don't understand."

Lisbon rolled her eyes. "And everything should be explained to you," she said sarcastically.

Jane shook his head. He wasn't explaining this well. She was taking it all the wrong way. "Of course not," he assured her. "But I'm curious."

Lisbon raised her eyebrows, "About me?"

"Always," he admitted.

Lisbon scoffed. "Because I intrigue you?" she said dryly.

"You know you do," he told her softly.

"Yes, I'd imagine I'm an interesting study," Lisbon said almost playfully. "Something to keep the great Patrick Jane's mind occupied."

Jane looked up in shock. "No..."

"No?" she smirked. "So, a distraction then? A curiosity?"

"What?" he asked, getting lost in the confusion she was causing.

"Or are you fishing for information should this particular need arise again," Lisbon wondered, her frustrations with him making her crueller than she meant to be. "As you said, Danny Ruskin's hardly the type to stay out of trouble. Knowing a sure-fire way to get me onside might prove useful."

"Stop," he ordered desperately.

"What?" she asked, trying to sound nonchalant, but the slightest break in her voice gave her away.

"Please just stop," Jane repeated, running a hand through his hair. Then he met her gaze, her eyes harder than he liked. "I would never..." he insisted.

"Good god, you mean that," Lisbon said in shock.

He exhaled in relief, "Of course."

She stared at him for a moment before asking more gently, "So if not idle curiosity, why does it matter so much?"

Jane was frustrated now, and his frustration made him incautious. "Because you matter!" he hissed.

Lisbon froze.

Jane figured since he was already in for it he may as well continue. "Why else would it matter that you've done such an obvious personal favour for me, Teresa? Especially one with such an obvious possible cost to yourself?"

"Family," she murmured absently.

"Danny's not your family," he reminded her again.

"You look out for your family, I look out for mine. Is that what you wanted to hear Patrick?" she asked softly.

Oh yes, he thought to himself. Oh yes. "Teresa..."

"I wasn't about to let you throw away your job," she told him defensively. Especially since it was all he had. He'd even admitted it to her once.

Not quite germane to the point, Jane thought idly, but he let it pass. After all, if he lost the job what would he do with his time? And if he lost the job, he probably lost her, the only person he could count on. He lost the one person he could drop in on for tea and cookies. It scared him a little how important that was becoming. "Yeah, Pete mentioned your second visit to the fair," he admitted. "Appreciated the concern for me, but wasn't too pleased about your holding him at gunpoint and handcuffing him to his own truck though."

"I released him afterwards," Lisbon muttered. "And if he'd just told me where I could find you and Danny in the first place..."

"Not likely with that badge at your waist," Jane reminded her.

Lisbon sank back into the chair. "Right, forgot I was the enemy," she muttered.

"You're not the enemy," Jane assured her.

"Sure," she agreed unconvincingly.

"You're not!" he insisted.

"In the end I had to threaten you both at gunpoint!" Lisbon snapped.

"I had to make sure he wasn't guilty first!" Jane shot back.

Lisbon sighed. "I know," she said softly. "I just wish you woulda trusted me even a little first."

"I do trust you," Jane assured her.

"Obviously," she said sarcastically.

"Lisbon..."

"You don't trust anybody," she reminded him.

"I trust you with my life," Jane told her. "I'm just not sure I trust you with Danny's."

"Hm."

Jane sighed. He was going to have to tell her. "And I thought he was probably guilty," he admitted.

"What?" Lisbon asked in surprise. That was unexpected.

"I thought he was guilty," Jane repeated. "Pretty much assumed he was actually. So obviously I couldn't let you find him first. He called me out the blue, first time in years. And I assumed the worst."

"Even though he didn't have any violent priors?" Lisbon wondered.

"Logic doesn't always come into it when family's involved," Jane reminded her.

Lisbon had to give him that one, "That's certainly true."

"Plus I owed him after I got his sister killed," Jane added with an attempt at ease.

Lisbon looked at him in concern. "Jane..." she warned gently.

He ignored her, choosing instead to try to explain, "Angie was the only good thing in Danny's life."

She shook her head, refusing to accept his attempted justification of his guilt, "That doesn't mean that you..."

"You're hardly one to preach against protecting the undeserving Lisbon," Jane reminded her, though to her shock his tone was affectionate not judgemental.

"Shut up," she replied almost as affectionately.

"No," he told her with a grin, one she thought she saw reach his eyes for just a moment.

She rolled her own eyes because she knew he'd expect it, was looking for it even. "Course not."

Jane smiled at her. Then he sighed, glanced to the side, and the smile slid slowly off his face. "I him told he should try and forgive me," he said after a moment.

"Maybe he already has," Lisbon suggested tentatively.

Jane sent her a look which told him what he thought of that idea.

Lisbon shrugged. "Hey, you did just get him off a murder charge," she reminded her consultant. "It is possible."

"I suppose," Jane said slowly.

"There you go!" she replied cheerfully.

He glanced at her again, his eyes amused this time. "When did you get so optimistic?"

"One of us has to be," Lisbon told him. "Otherwise this conversation is going to get depressing fast. And I have a feeling it's not going to be you that talks about glasses being half full tonight."

"Maybe next time," Jane promised her.

She nodded.

He played with his cup. Lisbon knew there was something on his mind, but she didn't want to press for fear that he'd just shut down. So she waited, and she had another cookie.

"That's why I told Danny to let go," Jane admitted. "So that he could try and be happy, maybe a little less traumatized. Holding on to anger isn't healthy. It'll destroy him. He needs to let go."

Lisbon bit her tongue just in time.

Jane smirked, knowing what she was thinking. "Hating me is a waste of energy anyway. I'm not worth it."

"Jane..."

"I'm not," her consultant explained. "Far better to devote his energies to something productive."

"Like what?" Lisbon asked almost curiously. Who knew what Jane might suggest to someone as a way to move on from the loss of a loved one?

Jane shrugged. "Well, I suggested finding someone to love," he admitted. "It might make him happier, give him something to live for, maybe even make him less reckless. Though Danny wasn't sure he could ever do that."

Lisbon felt an odd constriction in her chest, and couldn't speak.

"Though of course, Danny's also a bit of a sociopath," Jane added. "So that may be part of it."

"Of course," Lisbon added absently. "Still, it's not a bad idea, to find something that makes it worthwhile to get up in the morning."

Jane sighed. "I might even consider it myself, if I had that luxury," he added jocularly.

"Yeah," Lisbon agreed, her heart beating a touch faster than it should have been.

Jane glanced over in alarm and took her hand. "No," he said desperately. "You, you can," he assured her. "You can find someone Lisbon."

She looked at him, with an expression almost amused by his statement. "Sure I can," she said.

Her sarcasm had never been so unwelcome to him. "Who wouldn't want you?" he asked, with a smile.

Her eyes widened. She glanced down at their still-joined hands to hide their expression, squeezed gently, and withdrew, reminding herself why nothing was ever defined with Jane. "Guess I just work too hard," she said finally.

Jane nodded, and ignored the near-perpetual urge to touch her. "And I've got the attention of a serial killer."

Lisbon's lips quirked up into a half-smile. It was the best she could do.

"I'm sorry you got caught in the middle," Jane told her again, not sure exactly what he was referring to, as was more often the case with her.

Lisbon chose to believe he was talking about the situation with Danny. "You said that already," she reminded him.

Jane followed her lead. "I didn't know what to do," he admitted.

"I can understand that," Lisbon repeated.

"I thought you might," Jane admitted in relief. It made him feel better, knowing for sure that she wasn't mad at him. She very rarely was, but it was always something that he liked to check.

"Well, like I said, I've bailed little brothers out of trouble more times than I can count," Lisbon reminded him.

Jane almost laughed, "So we've got that in common then."

Lisbon returned the grin, "Who'd have thought we'd ever find common ground?"

"I'm sure if we really thought about it..." Jane said teasingly.

Lisbon cut him off with a mini-glare, "I was kidding Jane."

"I know," he admitted.

"I've bailed my brothers out more than once, though it was only legal a couple times, and often minor. Individually they were each less trouble than Danny apparently was," Lisbon admitted. "Thank goodness."

"Though you did have three of them," Jane pointed out.

"Yeah," she smirked.

Jane watched her face, saw the nostalgia. "Part of you misses it," he said in surprise.

"I guess I do, in a way," she admitted.

"Explains why your default state is to protect the men in your life," Jane said cheerfully.

"You already knew that," she reminded him.

Jane paused. "You want to talk about it?" he asked gently.

Lisbon shrugged, oddly reminded of the start of their conversation, "I don't know."

"I won't push you if you don't," Jane promised her.

That caught her attention. "What's gotten into you tonight?" she asked in surprise.

"I like talking to you," he told her with a cheerful grin, one that even she could tell wasn't actually masking a lie. Not in the usual way at least.

She grinned, pleased. "Oh."

"So you think of me as a troublesome little brother then?" Jane wondered.

"Not exactly," she admitted.

"Good," Jane said emphatically without thinking.

She froze, suddenly feeling the odd tightness in her chest a second time.

Jane took a breath. "I'd like to think I'm on slightly more equal footing than that," he told her, trying to break the tension.

"You wish," she replied with a shaky laugh.

"Hey!" Jane objected a little too loudly.

But his exaggerated objection brought her back to herself, out of danger. "Someone's sensitive tonight," she told him.

"Someone's taking great pleasure in mocking me," he shot back.

"Obviously."

He grinned, "Cruel woman."

She quirked her head to the side, "Maybe."

Jane watched her, assessing.

"Oh just ask whatever you want to ask me," Lisbon finally ordered impatiently.

"Can I come by from time to time with cookies?" He was smiling, but she thought she could detect a hint of nervousness in his eyes, in the way they scanned her face. So Lisbon decided to keep things light.

"In spite of my cruelty?" she wondered.

"Yes," Jane told her. It was always a risk, being this open with her, but deep down she was feeling frustrated and uncertain, and he needed her to know she was valued. That he was a friend.

"I never turn cookies away," Lisbon replied. "Especially ones as good as these."

"Speaking of cruelty... Or maybe that's just gluttony," Jane mused.

Lisbon touched his wrist gently, "You know I'd never turn you away either."

He wanted to take hold of her hand and keep it, but didn't dare. "You're one of a kind Lisbon," he said instead.

"Oh come on," she said, obviously disbelieving.

"You are!" Jane insisted. "Even Pete likes you."

That surprised her. "He does?"

"He heard you let Danny go," Jane explained. Actually, Jane had told his old friends what had happened himself. Figured Pete and Sam deserved the truth. And he didn't want either of them to get the wrong idea about her. It wasn't fair. "Said you were some kind 'a cop. He's even decided to forgive you for handcuffing him by the way."

"That's nice of him," Lisbon sputtered awkwardly.

"You're very likeable," Jane assured her.

She didn't quite know what to say to that. "Well..."

"Yeah," Jane agreed. "Seems you managed to convince him you cared about yours truly."

Lisbon winced, "I..."

"Though did you really have to mention that this job was all I had?" Jane asked in mock-irritation that had a hint of truth in it "I'd already told Sam I was fine."

"You're not fine," Lisbon reminded him.

"Yeah, well now they're worried," Jane said petulantly. "It's annoying."

Lisbon grinned. He really was a child sometimes. "People worry when they care," she explained a little patronizingly.

"It's less annoying when you do it," Jane muttered.

"What?" Lisbon asked, wondering if Jane had put something in his own tea. He was being oddly... forthcoming.

"I don't know why," Jane continued as if she hadn't interrupted. "But it is. Maybe I'm just used to it. Even if I think you shouldn't. Worry that is."

"I'm glad you've come to terms with my concern, at least in your way," Lisbon told him. "But Jane?"

"Yeah?"

"You ever drive away and abandon me on my own again, I'll kick your ass into next week," she promised. They'd had enough of a heart to heart that evening. She had a feeling neither of them could take much more.

"Duly noted," Jane told her with a smirk.

"So..."

"So!" Jane said brightly.

"Have you relieved your curiosity for the evening then?" Lisbon asked, after a slight pause.

"Believe it or not Lisbon," Jane told her. "I didn't come over simply to interrogate you, as you seem to often think."

"Really?" she asked.

"Really," he promised.

"Then why did you come over," she wondered.

He rested his elbows on his knees and clasped his hands, grinning. "Simple idle conversation," he told her.

"You're not serious," she said.

"Why not?" Jane asked. "What could be more natural than chatting with a friend over tea and cookies?" he wondered. "People seem to do it all the time in novels."

"Yeah, novels set at least a hundred years ago!" Lisbon replied.

"Oh that's not true," Jane said with a wave of his hand. "And even if it was, doesn't mean it's a bad idea."

"I suppose not," Lisbon said grudgingly.

Jane smirked. "So?"

"So?" Lisbon repeated.

Jane raised an eyebrow in expectation.

Lisbon sighed, realizing that he expected her to start. Then she smirked. "So," she said slowly. "Seen any good movies lately?"

Jane let out a huff of laughter and let his chin drop to his chest. When he raised it a moment later Lisbon could see his eyes were twinkling. "You know I haven't," he accused. "But well played m'dear."

Lisbon settled back into her chair, "What about books then?" she wondered.

"I'm not discussing whatever manual on techniques of good leadership you have on your bedside table, Lisbon," Jane warned her.

She smirked. "Worried you might start taking a hint?" she taunted. When he started to object she continued. "Fiction only," she promised.

"Fine," Jane said as he settled back onto her couch. He needed to get comfortable after all. He didn't think he'd be leaving for a while.

xxxxxx

Jane's premonition was right. An hour (and another pot of tea) later the two of them were still in Lisbon's living room, the cookies almost gone.

Lisbon was listening to Jane finish up a story about the time he and Pete had almost gotten themselves arrested in San Diego when she raised a hand to subtly stifle a yawn.

Jane noticed anyway. "Bedtime," he said softly.

"I am a little tired," she admitted.

Jane nodded. "Then you should get your sleep."

Lisbon stood, stretched, and carried the teapot to the kitchen. "You wanna stay?" she called over her shoulder.

"Do you mind?" Jane asked from his place on her couch.

She glared at him.

He let out an almost inaudible breath in relief. "Thank you."

Lisbon walked over to her closet and tossed him a pillow.

"This is new," Jane mentioned absently as he caught it.

"Yeah, it is," she agreed sarcastically.

Jane instinctively tightened his grip on the pillow. She'd bought it for him. She'd bought it specifically for him. He watched her for a moment. She always seemed to be able to show him he mattered to her, but he never seemed able to reciprocate. Not in the way he wanted to at least. She didn't seem to see that she was the only one in the world that he would have trusted to help him with Danny. Anyone else he would have flat out run from. But not Lisbon. Not forever at least. And she needed to know that. She... she just did. "You're second," he blurted out.

"What?" Lisbon asked in confusion.

"After Danny," Jane explained. "You're second."

She was staring at him now, comprehension dawning. "Jane..."

"I want you to know that," he told her.

She stood frozen in her kitchen for a second longer. "I'm here if you need me," she said eventually.

"Okay," he said.

With one last smile she went upstairs.

Jane watched her go, ever the protective big sister. The woman who would protect those she considered family with her last breath.

He guessed maybe Danny was fated to always be saved by big sisters. Even if they weren't always his own.

She was something else. Maybe Danny would find a Lisbon of his own one day. Jane hoped so. She was exactly the type of woman who might be able to help him forget his anger. Help him find forgiveness. Someone like Lisbon would certainly have the strength necessary for the job. And if someone like Lisbon could teach Danny to forgive his brother in law, maybe one day someone like Lisbon could teach...

Jane lay down on his pillow. The one she'd bought him. She deserved a little happiness of her own. She deserved someone who would devote his life to making her happy, who...

Blind fury welled up inside him.

He'd kill Red John when he found him.

The bastard was hurting big sisters, and leaving those who cared for them feeling ineffectual and guilty.

xxxxxx

The End