DISCLAIMER: Don't own anything associated with the show… I just like playing with the characters in it from time to time. Dance Monkeys! Dance!
RATING: Teen/PG
SPOILERS: Season 8
PAIRINGS: Nick/Mandy and a glimpse of GSR
SUMMARY: In the aftermath of Warrick's death and his friends moving on, Nick ends up losing so much more when he makes a life altering mistake.
A/N: Finally made some progress on the ending, so here's the next chapter. All's I can say is, at least there weren't any death threats. My betas, on the other hand, were rallying up the death squads when I gave them that first chapter.
REVIEWS: Reviews are the way I know if people are enjoying the work or not. So, if you leave one, THANKS! And if not, I hope you found at least a little something to brighten your day, and thanks for taking the time to read.

Chapter 2

Mandy never came back. When he tried to find her at the lab, to tell her he was sorry, to beg for her forgiveness, she wasn't there. He must have called her cell phone a hundred times that night, but she never answered.

Finally, he went to Henry, to ask him where she was, and to try to get a message to her. They had been great friends over the years, and he knew Mandy probably went straight to his place the night before. But Henry wasn't there either.

For three days he tried to reach both of them, with no luck. On the second day, he came home to find all of her things moved out of the condo. After the third day, he staked out Henry's place, but there was no sign of them. They were gone.

His mind raced with a million scenarios, but he simply couldn't believe that Mandy had run off with her best friend like that. It just didn't make any sense.

On the fifth day, he had his answer. Walking past the toxicology lab, he found Henry back at work, just like nothing had ever happened. His gut immediately tied itself up into a thousand well executed knots, and he quickly hurried away from the lab. By the end of the shift he couldn't wait any longer. He had to know.

As he entered Henry's lab, the tech didn't even break his eyes away from his microscope when he said, "Don't."

Nick stood there gaping like a well landed bass as he tried to process what was happening. "Don't even ask me. It won't do you any good." Henry finally looked up from the lenses and Nick saw the pain in the man's eyes. "She's gone, Nick. That's all you need to know."

He watched as Henry retrieved his slides and slipped them into an evidence bag. When he sealed them up and rose from his seat to leave, the tech gave him one last parting shot. "And that's a hell of a lot more than you deserve."

Henry was right. He didn't deserve anything. Not after what he did.

He wasn't thinking clearly, but it was the only thing that made sense to him at the time. He couldn't leave, but he couldn't bear to watch her wasting away, waiting for him to see what was there all along.

He didn't need Las Vegas. He didn't need the Crime Lab. His only real loss, up until that moment, was in Warrick's death. And even that never changed his friendship with the man. Nick still cared about him like a brother; he simply wasn't physically there anymore. But Warrick's memory and their friendship would always be with him.

Slowly, he began to realize he hadn't really lost Sara and Grissom either, they just weren't in Vegas. They were together, and they were happy, and they were still a part of his life, even if they weren't close anymore.

The weeks and months that followed Mandy's departure quickly added up, but he felt like they were an eternity. His life with her felt like a different time, a different era, a different life, and tore him down more and more every day. He wished more than anything that he could go back to that place and time, and change it all.

As he started packing up his office for the last time, he realized everything was for naught. He was leaving Las Vegas, and there was nothing to show for the sacrifices he had made. Greg was gone, off living the life he had been afraid to grab onto. Catherine had her daughter, her mother, her freedom, and her career. Sara and Grissom were off enjoying their lives together. And he was packing it in and calling it quits.

Catherine didn't even flinch when he gave her his notice. She nodded solemnly and said she had seen it coming. After Warrick's case was solved, all the drive simply vanished like so much dust in the air. There was just nothing left of the things that made the job his anymore. He didn't care about the justice of it. And when he couldn't even muster any sympathy for the victims, he knew he was done. When he didn't feel anything, he knew he needed to walk away. But what was he going to do?

When he first thought about turning in his notice, he just wanted to go home to Texas. But the more he thought about it, the more he came to understand that he didn't have a home to go to anymore. His father was gone, and his mother was caught up in being a widow and a grandmother. The old homestead just wasn't home to anyone now.

The first couple of weeks he just stayed home. He tried packing, but the half finished boxes scattered throughout the condo only sat there mocking him. What did he have to fill them with? Trinkets of achievements long past? A few photographs of people gone forever? He felt even more empty and alone staring at those boxes. There were no fights over how much crap had been accumulated over the years, no taunting about the old clothes that should have been thrown out, no worrying about getting everything to fit in a new place, and no one there to share any of that with him.

In a fit of drunken melancholy, he snapped at Greg, who had called to see if he wanted to come out to L.A. for a visit after he learned of his resignation. Nick lashed out at the younger man and told him, "I don't want your goddamn pity. Just let me wallow in my own mistakes in peace."

The next call he got was even less pleasant.

Jim Brass was at his door bright and early the next morning, pounding so hard Nick was sure it was the hangover from hell, come to take him away. When he finally realized it was actually the door, he stumbled to it to find the stoic detective standing there with a very serious and determined scowl on his face.

Giving him the disappointed once over, he simply growled, "I don't give a rat's ass what you've been doing until now. Go take a shower. You're getting out of here."

Nick didn't have the clarity or the energy to argue with the stern man barking out the orders, he simply followed the instructions. Before he knew what was happening, he was in the front seat of Jim's car as they were pulling up at McCarran.

Nick turned to the man in confusion, but he only handed him the plane ticket and told him get out. "I don't understand."

"Neither do I, but Sara still seems to think your sorry ass is worth saving. So, get on the damn plane and listen to what she's got to say." Brass was a little more gruff than normal, and he could only assume he knew about his blow up with Greg. As much grief as the old detective liked to give Greg he knew Brass liked the kid a lot.

He looked down at the tickets in his hands and finally nodded his head. "Yeah, okay."

"You don't get a lot of chances in this world, Nick. And you never know when it's gonna be your last. So, stop fucking it up and listen to what they've got to say. All anybody wants is for you to make it through this rough spot. Even me." Nick finally looked back up at the man with his admission. "Otherwise, I would've just shot you. Nobody should be that miserable. It would've been a mercy killing."

Nick chuffed at the man's attempt at a joke, and nodded his head. "Thanks, Jim."

Walking through the airport, Nick finally understood he did have something to show for his time in Las Vegas; his friends. He only hoped it was enough to keep him going.