A growl of aggravation left you as you had trouble saddling your pony. The stupid buckle just did not want to go into place. Now matter how much you fought with it, it just wouldn't seem to work and you were getting very frustrated. Closing your eyes you let out a heavy sigh trying to calm your growing anger. "Here let me help you with that," a voice said behind you. Turning around you spotted Fili. Every since you had joined this quest he had been nothing, but helpful.
If there's a prize for rotten judgmentI guess I've already won thatNo man is worth the aggravationThat's ancient history; been there, done that
You gratefully accepted his help a smile on your lips, but when he walked away you scolded yourself. It didn't matter how kind he was or how good looking. Men were all the same. You knew in the end he would only end up hurting you like your last lover had and so you refused to admit that you felt even just a little bit drawn to him. No you would keep your heart locked away.
Who d'you think you're kiddin'?He's the earth and heaven to yaTry to keep it hiddenHoney, we can see right through ya (Oh nooo)Girl, you can't conceal itWe know how you feelAnd who you're thinking of
That night as you made camp you watched Fili move around. He was so graceful and so good looking that it was hard to keep your eyes off of him. "Why don't you just tell him how you feel? It's clear to everyone you like him, Y/N. We can all see it no matter how you try it hide it," Balin told you as he walked up beside you. You huffed and turned away from him going to set up your bedroll. That old dwarf obviously didn't know what he was talking about.
No chance, no wayI won't say it, no, no(You swoon, you sigh)(Why deny it? Uh-oh)It's too clichéI won't say I'm in love
The next few days were filled with almost the entire company minus a select few trying to get you to admit your feelings. Of course you kept denying that you had such feelings. No Fili was a friend to you and that was it. You refused to admit you felt anything more than friendship for the blonde prince. Even if your heart did flutter every time you looked at him. "Just stop guys. It's not gonna happen. Give up already," you told them when Kili for the tenth time that day asked when you were going to become his sister.
I thought my heart had learned its lessonIt feels so good when you start outMy head is screaming "Get a grip, girlUnless you're dying to cry your heart out"
That night when Fili offered you his spare blanket you had felt butterflies in your stomach. It was such a sweet gesture and you had almost admitted to him right then that you had more than friendly feelings toward him, but your brain stopped you. It reminded you of what you had went through in the past. The heartache you had suffered and how it wasn't worth it to go through it again.
(Ohhh...)You keep on denyingWho you are and how you're feelingBaby, we're not buyingHon, we saw you hit the ceiling(Oh, no)Face it like a grown-upWhen you gonna own upThat you got, got, got it bad?
Today as you rode Thorin came up beside you. You looked over at the king curiously. He had never said more than a few words to you in passing so you found it odd that he had brought his pony up beside your own. "It has come to my attention that you have feelings for my nephew." You let out a groan and looked at him. You couldn't believe he was now a part of all of this. "I just wanted to tell you that once you get the courage to admit it, I approve. You would be a good match for him," he said before riding off not giving you a chance to say anything.
No chance, no wayI won't say it, no, no(Give up, give in)(Check the grin; you're in love)This scene won't playI won't say I'm in love(You're doin' flips)(Read our lips: "You're in love")
Once again you were watching Fili. This time he was sharpening his blade meticulously. Something about the way he moved the stone in such careful movements made you wonder if he was that careful with everything he found important. Bilbo sat down next to you startling you from your thoughts. "I don't know why you won't admit it. Fili is a good guy. I know he would never hurt you," he said. You looked over at Bilbo with a raised brow. "I don't know what you're talking about. There is nothing to admit," you denied once more.
You're way off base, I won't say itGet off my case, I won't say it(Girl, don't be proud!)(It's okay, you're in love)Ohhh...At least out loudI won't say I'm in love(Shoo do, shoo do, shoo do, shoo do)(Sha-la-la-la la la, ahh)
You were panting as you had just escaped the goblin tunnels. "Y/N, you're hurt," Fili said pointing to a small cut on your cheek. He tore a piece of cloth from his tunic and got it wet with his water flask. Gently he cupped your face and began washing the cut clean. You gazed into his dazzling blue eyes seeing nothing, but caring and honesty. Maybe he wasn't like all other men. Maybe he wouldn't hurt you after all. In that moment you decided to at least admit to yourself that you loved him. And maybe one day you would get the courage to tell him as well.