Nicholas' Note:

Sorry for the late update! Thanks for those who favorited this and those who commented! This one was edited as of December 12, 2010, I decided to go over it again before finishing and posting the next chapter.

The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
Gets stronger then your pride
The trouble with love is
It doesn't care how fast you fall
And you can't refuse the call
See you've got no say at all

(The trouble with love is by Kelly Clarkson)

Title: Bookworm

"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."

Two Weeks Later…

Wolfram was reading The Prizoner of Azkaban from the Harry Potter set Yuri brought with him from his recent visit on Earth. Anissina gave him the translating reading spectacles that allowed him to understand it completely just like all the other books he read in Shin Makoku.

He easily got hooked up with the first two series; was deeply moved by it that he became immovable himself. He rarely went out to eat and bathe. Sometimes he would order the maids to have his meal brought up to him in the King's Chamber. There were times when he won't even take a bath for days and Yuri did not become conscious with it until the blonde advise him to move away to the far edge of the bed so he won't smell him. At first, Yuri was dumbfounded and responded in his usual wimpy 'Eh!' while retreating as far as possible from the blonde. But in the middle of that night, Yuri awoke and found himself hugging the blonde again and he realized the smell hadn't changed at all. He didn't have to inhale deep to smell it; the enchanting sunflower and baby powder scent still lingered on his young bedmate. Sometimes Yuri thought that maybe Wolfram was merely joking so he could have the bigger space of the bed for himself. Wolfram von Bielefeld smells so good it was enough to cradle the Maoh back to sleep.

Yuri liked the unintentional result that the Harry Potter brought about. He had been able to shut the blonde's mouth for a week. Yes, he was feeling the peace and was celebrating it internally and thought of bringing more books for Wolfram. A good deed outside with a hidden selfish agenda. But when a week had passed, he was beginning to miss the blonde's shadowing, nagging and seizing him. He found himself wishing he kept away from Wolfram those books. He actually meant it for Greta because she would certainly find the Wizarding World of Harry Potter as interesting as in Anissina's books. But when he returned to his room to pick the set, he discovered that it was already in the hands of the curious and noted bookworm ex-prince.

Yuri didn't argue about it seeing the advantages earlier than the disadvantages of Wolfram's book worming mode. One disadvantage was that he was receiving the growing blame from Gwendal (who also saw the advantage at first). Apparently, Wolfram continued to neglect his errands and refused to report back to his duties. There was another time when the blonde even pretended he was sick (a façade that wasn't tolerated by Gisela, but when the blonde promised her not to do it again while giving her his cute chibi look, she decided it wouldn't hurt her pride to go with the idea and let this one pass). Yuri never imagined his blonde friend could be so lazy, stubborn and irresponsible but at any rate, he found the mischievous acts utterly cute.

Tired from the day's work, Yuri was relieved to know he was finally going to bed. He peeked through the door before entering, wanting to see how the blonde was doing. Wolfram was lying on his stomach, his legs swinging up and down like a child on the playground's lawn. A small orb was dancing on his index finger, illuminating the book he was reading. Yuri blushed when he saw the lower part of his friend's nightgown slid down and crumpled down on his hips when he did another brisk swing of his legs. Now the skin way up from the knees was so revealed, but since the blonde was too immersed in his reading, he didn't noticed what his legs had done.

Yuri swallowed back the lump that risen to his throat. He took a deep breath, dismissing the unknown feeling that just heated his body again. Relax Yuri. Remember, you're looking at a man.

He went inside the room with careful yet heavy footsteps and closed the door with a soft thump. He wanted to make his presence known so that he wouldn't look like he was trying to shock the blonde again. One experience was enough to teach him never to fright the blonde when he was seriously reading.

Wolfram quickly glanced towards the doorway and gave him a sleepy warming smile, taking away all the exhaustion Yuri had a while ago. Yuri thought the blonde looked cuter with those big spectacles on; somehow the blonde resembled a cartoon character he just couldn't recall at the moment.

And with a blink of an eye, Wolfram returned to his reading.

Yuri was a bit used to this silence greeting him every night after a long day's work. It somehow felt lonely and boring. It was as if Wolfram was barely there when he goes to bed and would suddenly come out when Yuri was already in the middle of his sleep and then the featherweight blonde would send him his habitual painful blows and in worst cases, knocking Yuri totally off the bed.

"How's your day?" Wolfram asked, not taking his eyes off the book.

"Tiring as usual," Yuri replied in a weary voice. "Gwendal doubled my paperwork and he was goading at me to force you to attend back to your responsibilities."

"And what did you tell him?" Wolfram asked, his eyes going back and forth, taking in the book word by word. He suddenly chuckled to himself that made Yuri cringed a bit. Let me guess, it was probably Fred and George, Yuri grumbled to himself.

"I apologized on your behalf, as usual," Yuri said sighing. It was a pain in the ass— Gwendal's scolding, and as much as possible he didn't want to stress himself again by merely remembering it.

Yuri inhaled deeply before letting his well-rehearsed enlightening speech out. You can do it Yuri. Here goes nothing.

"Wolfram, why don't you just do your reading during your spare time? You know… I never thought you could be this irresponsible…" He paused for a while before continuing, "Again, you're being impossible."

Wolfram grunted and immediately closed the book with a thud and threw a dangerous look at Yuri but his body remained immobile.

"It wasn't my fault you brought these books here," Wolfram spat.

"Actually, I brought it for—" Yuri stopped on his words, thinking it wasn't a good idea to make the blonde feel it wasn't for him, again. But he was too late and the first words of his sentence were as sharp as Wolfram's hearing, the flaxen one caught them clearly and he was not an idiot not to know how to fill in the blanks.

"For whom? Do you really think I'm not aware of that?" Wolfram said indignantly. "Well… I'm sorry for happening to see them and since I'm a book lover, I got curious over it… Of course I knew you brought them for our daughter to read. And please don't cut off your sentence thinking I wouldn't want to hear it or shouldn't hear it. Do you really think I'm that selfish and spiteful?"

"No, I—" Yuri wanted to kick himself for saying the wrong things again. He knew Wolfram had always been selfless and was not that tightfisted to even feel jealous at their daughter.

"As long as it's for Greta, there's no problem with me."

Wolfram hastily placed the book on the bedside table that was within his reach. Yuri felt that he strike something within his blonde friend again. In their years of being bounded together by the accidental engagement, he got so used to Wolfram's nagging, hurting and he knew better now than cowering from all of it. He was accustomed to facing them boldly and was keen to solving them right away. He knew Wolfram's weakness, how to calm and sway him. Sometimes Yuri felt he was being unfair and taking advantage of the other's feelings for him. So when he finished putting on his pajamas, he walked towards the side of the bed where the blonde wasn't moving except for his emerald eyes that were following him.

Then all of a sudden, Yuri's eyes were drawn back to the half-exposed hips of Wolfram. He carelessly blushed that the blonde saw it and trailed where Yuri's stare had fallen onto. Realizing it was his bare hips that distracted the double black, Wolfram turned crimson red and immediately shifted his position and pulled down his nightgown.

Did Yuri just blush because of my exposed hips?

Wolfram fought to keep his heartbeat as normal as possible. Suddenly, the air around him felt hot and he was starting to sweat. He averted his gaze from the double black and looked down instead on the blankets, pretending he was fixing them. He didn't want Yuri to see him blushing as well. Embarrassment was swelling inside him and he didn't know why. Why am I being so damn conservative? In of the corner of his eye, he could see that Yuri was already moving slowly and closer.

"Um… Wolf…" Yuri's voice was dry now unlike before. He couldn't fight off the blush that was caused by the beautiful person before him. But there's something in the way Wolfram hid his lower body that made Yuri flush even more. That was very cute…

Yuri reached the edge of the bed now. His right knee was bending on the mattress with his hands firmly grasping the bed covers now, supporting his weight in climbing to the expansive bed. Wolfram didn't look up at him, he was afraid to do so. Yuri's movements were obviously up to something he wasn't confident he wanted now.

Unsure of what he was doing with curiosity and a strange urge rousing him, Yuri was gradually leaning towards Wolfram. The sunflower scent quickly grew strong in his nose.

No! I shouldn't be doing this! I couldn't possibly want this! I should stop this!

But his face was already inches from the right cheek of Wolfram now. Wolfram shut his eyes, fearing Yuri's advancing. He could feel Yuri's hot breath brushing against his pink cheeks. He knew he had been wishing for this moment for years— for Yuri to kiss him willingly, but why was he feeling confused and uneasy now that it was coming?

Yuri saw his blonde friend's reaction and it disturbed him quite a bit. He was sure Wolfram would want to be kissed by him (now that's quite an arrogant thought), knowing well that the other boy loved him so much. But why the heck was his fair friend cowering like this? Yuri's strong urge to continue on ignored it and next moment, he was grabbing the blonde by the right arm with strength that made the smaller body turn and face him. Even still, Wolfram didn't look at him. With his other hand, Yuri touched the beautiful face. It was then Wolfram was convinced of Yuri's intentions and got the courage to look up at his fiancé. Questioning emerald eyes met aggressive black ones. Both flash a hint of indecision.

Without a word, Yuri rapidly pressed his lips against Wolfram; Wolfram's eyes widened in shock albeit he already expected it. The event of their first kiss flashed back to him, when he wasn't even aware it happened. Blame it on the Original King Shinou who always sticks his nose on others' businesses. Wolfram would have wanted his first kiss to be made out of love but unfortunately for him, it turned out to be one of the Original King's pranks. Sometimes, Wolfram would wonder how Yuri had responded to it and how did the double black find it. He never dared to ask so he never got an answer. He was a bit grateful to the Great Sage when the other double black slipped something about the incident in a teasing one night when they were dining. According to him, Yuri closed his eyes fearfully when Wolfram was leaning closer onto him and when the kiss took place, he swore he saw Yuri stopped protesting and even kissed back in a blink before they were separated. Yuri blushed at the other double black's tall story back then, retorted a bit and changed the subject. It was one of those moments where Wolfram felt somehow a spark of hope and now… I almost forgot! Yuri's kissing me!

The kissing was chaste and Yuri preferred to keep it that way or maybe he could only hope so. He had rushed into this and now he was stuck; totally captivated by his gorgeous blonde friend. At first, he didn't know how to start it, but now that he was in it, he found out that putting a stop to it was harder than he thought. His heart was hammering inside his chest, a strange sensation came tinkling into his nerves, and he was sweating profusely as the air grew tighter around them. With every twist of his lips locked against the other's, a shock of pleasure ran through his spine.

Wolfram was clutching tightly on Yuri's unbuttoned shirt. Their kiss was becoming more passionate. Yuri was quite alarmed at himself when his hands instinctively began to search and caress everything it came across with on the blonde's upper body. His hands went looking for the perfect spot were he could undo the nightgown and found that the answer was still beneath the blankets. Wolfram then moved his hands and rubbed Yuri's exposed chest. Yuri's body was more muscled than before, very stiff and matured almost like that of Wolfram's older brothers. He had become manlier than ever, making the blonde want him more. Wolfram on the other hand was not making so much progress unlike him, yet Yuri observed that his blonde friend's body was developing into a more feminine shape than before. Indeed, the blonde had grown muscles too, but his muscles were placed perfectly like that of a woman's. These were the grounds that spark Yuri's interest and longing.

Wolfram…

Oh Yuri…

Yuri slowly did away with the blanket covering the lower body of his bedmate. His aggressive hands traveled up within the frilly gown grabbing the sexy hips he was longing to feel on his hands the moment he had a peep on them. Wolfram flinched at the intimate move as Yuri's hands finally came at the edge of his underwear. Then the double black increased the pressure of their kissing, trying to force the smaller one into a French kiss. Wolfram moaned fervently at the contact yet did not welcome the more lustful signal.

Now Yuri was completely kneeling on the mattress between the blonde's spread-out legs. He felt himself growing half-hard and when his body leaned closest against the smaller body, he felt that Wolfram was growing hard too. His erection perked up when it began to brush against the other's hardness.

Then, all of a sudden, the confusion returned to haunt him.

What the hell am I doing? Why am I kissing Wolfram...? He didn't even ask for this! What's happening to me? No! I shouldn't be doing this! This is wrong! But why do I feel like I want this so badly? What's this creepy feeling? Arggghhh. It feels so damn good… Kissing him feels so good… Feeling him against me was so pleasurable! But wait! I'm not gay! I like girls! Well…maybe I was never attracted to one…But I know I'm a straight guy! This is wrong! I should not be kissing another man… and I being the one who even started it! What's gotten into me? Blame it on these sexy hips… yes! This isn't my fault! It's Wolfram's! He was being so terribly cute these days!

But no… even still this is wrong! Shouri would laugh at me for falling for a guy! My friends would tease me! Society would look down on me! I'm not gay!

Darn you Wolfram for being so damn beautiful! You came into my life all of a sudden and effortlessly taking the position of the prettiest person I've ever come across with!

Those green honest and beautiful eyes… these golden curls…this milky moist skin…this perfectly molded hot body that looked so feminine…this sunflower scent…this beautiful soul…

But I'm not gay! I should stop this! Noooooooo!

DARN YOU WOLFRAM VON BIELEFELD!

Yuri broke away with such force that had the blonde thrown back against the mattress. He heard Wolfram's surprised voice cried an 'Oh!' and he immediately looked at the blonde, worried if he had hurt him. Wolfram was lying on his back with a flushed face mixed with confusion and shock. He wasn't looking at Yuri; his eyes were fixed at the canopy of the bed as he tried to breathe back. Yuri's heart was still pounding as he was panting for air too. He was angry at himself, for being such a wimp that could not even make up his own mind. His eyes examined the blonde, who was now looking down at him. Wolfram's hardness was so obvious with his position but the blonde was too flustered to move just yet. He didn't mind that Yuri sees it and even fix eyes on it. He was also having it anyway. Yuri's eyes examined it for a few more seconds before roving up to Wolfram's glossy lips that were shining by the little light coming from the moon outside. Its baby pink color had turned into a shade of reddish pink and Yuri noticed the lower one was a bit swollen. Did I kiss him that hard?

"Yuri…" Wolfram breathed tensely.

"I… I'm sorry," Yuri swiftly defended, thinking about everything he had just done. "I didn't mean to… I know… It shouldn't have happened…"

Is this wimp trying to deny what he just did to me?Wolfram's thoughts churned from confusion to fury. Oh I knew it! He broke away because he was of course… still as clueless as he was! Because we're both men! With that soiled mindset of his… I shouldn't have let myself get carried away like that. Now, I'll end up getting hurt again…

He's making a fool of me again!

Wolfram didn't move. His arms were still spread out, his position- a cross, as if he was shot straight at the heart. That was just another joke, and a grave one from the dim-witted Maoh. Wolfram wished he could turn back the time… so instead of submitting himself to Yuri's kiss, he would be the one to push him away. But all happened in a spur of a moment and now, he was the one being pushed away again… and worst, was thrusted away by the king like a wasted whore.

"Did you enjoy it?" Wolfram asked softly in a mocking voice. "Or the more probable question was: do you enjoy it?"

Yuri merely stared at him, not getting Wolfram's words at all. He was currently battling the urge to go over the vulnerable blonde and kiss him again. Yuri knew Wolfram wasn't seducing him, yet he was mentally undone by the other young man's current position. His eyes were transfixed at the flat chest slowly rising up and falling down, taking back air.

"What are you staring at?" Wolfram asked acutely. The question snapped the double black back to his senses. Yuri lifted his gaze to meet the emerald eyes narrowed in infuriation and despise.

"Um…I… I…" Yuri found himself completely at a loss for words.

"I asked you if you enjoyed it. Do you enjoy it?"

"Wolfram… I…"Yuri wanted to say 'yes' but held it back because he continually refused to believe it himself and he wasn't sure if the follow-up question Wolfram threw at him was actually meant to offend him. "Wait… What do you mean I enjoy it?"

"This," Wolfram gestured towards the two of them. "Your silly game of pull and push… You see, you pull me towards you…like what you just did… and then push me away…"Wolfram gave a quiet laughter laced in sarcasm. "And then you want me to play the fool and believe that nothing happened… Anyway at the every end of this game, I'm not really the loser dupe, because I'm not the one fooling myself and full of pretensions. Drown in lies, Yuri Shibuya."

Wolfram smirked after his dialogue of truth. He was amused at himself, for being able to let out in order the exact words the wimp king needed to hear. AK.O.for you, Your Majesty.

Yuri looked squashed at Wolfram's words but did not counter the accusation since there was nothing but clear truth that had spitted out of the blonde's mouth. So clear there was no taint left for him to stir. And eventually, truth hurts.

"I don't… I didn't…" Yuri mumbled to himself, totally whacked.

"You're pathetic," Wolfram said sharply. Yuri was struck hard by the comment and his fists clenched at that. Anger was starting to brim in him. The attraction and desire he felt strongly before abruptly ebbed away. The blonde sat up and crawled to the edge of the bed to retrieve the blanket.

No, this shouldn't have happened. Yuri, you pushed him away again. How could you find happiness when you keep on doing this? Pushing the one who is the source of your joy?The Maoh in him spoke for his conscience. Then, the wimpy voice echoed next. But he's a man like me; I shouldn't blame myself for feeling confused and pushing him again.

But I have to be real. Damn... I really have no idea of the real me… the real feelings I have.

It shouldn't end this way, I shouldn't have broken away… it only made things worse for him and for me… I have to fix this fast…

Wolfram was busy fixing the blankets when Yuri suddenly lunged forward and seized him by the waist. What the? Wolfram was surprised at the sudden move that easily strike home at the beating organ in him again. Nonetheless a glint of fear ignited in him, fear that he had angered Yuri that much to attack him. But after a few seconds, he realized the action was apologizing and affectionate.

However the anger in him was still so fresh and unwavering. He grabbed the double black's hands and heaved them off of his waist. He thought Yuri would make it hard for him but thankfully, the grip hadn't gone that tighter that Wolfram was able to break free from them easily.

"Please don't—"

He turned and looked at Yuri, not being able to contain his mixed emotions and thus revealing to the other boy his aggrieved face. Yuri's thunderstruck face registered more distress and obvious hints of guilt and remorse.

Tears were starting to form in the corner of the blonde's eyes but he fought to hold them back, putting him into a slight nauseous state. He backed away as the confounded double black remained speechless and rigid.

"No," Wolfram whimpered weakly, turning his back on the other boy. "I had enough, Yuri. It's getting late. Go to sleep."

He was a bit relieved as he said this; he was finally able to put a stop to this damn ruckus. He cared less what Yuri would do next, but he was certain the other one would not make any move forward now that he was making it clear that he didn't want it. He moved to his part of the bed, stuffing his head in between pillows and covering himself with the blanket. He sensed no sign of movements by Yuri, who was probably still disconcerted, but he cared no more and so he didn't turned back to check on him. Wolfram felt the coldness beating him. He was like a blazing fire extinguished suddenly by a hailstorm. The ice daggers pierced through him— the water bearer did it. Yuri had caused him to feel so many diverse feelings in just less than half an hour. He had had enough. He felt so feeble now, his heart was so fractured it might break if he decided to push through the night. Now, all he wanted was to rest and to heal it again. He wanted to close his eyes and let the tears fall silently and out of Yuri's sight. He didn't want to wrinkle his face more; it would ruin his cherished beauty.

He decided it would be best for him to go back to his new-found comfort zone. He suddenly longed to be back to dreaming about Harry Potter and his adventures. He wanted to hold onto the story's theme where the so-called 'love' was said to be the strongest weapon of all. After all, all he could do was to hope again, that he could stay as strong as Harry Potter, holding onto the power of love 'til the very end.

To be continued…

P.S.

My other songs for this chapter: That's What You Get and I Caught Myself by Paramore, I Love the Way You Lie by Eminem and Rihanna, Do You Know What You Want by M2M, I Hate That I Love You by Rihanna and Ne-Yo, and a lot more of the same kind! Just wanna share it cause these songs reeeeaaaalllyyy fits the two!