Swinging Detective Chapter 2.

No thoughts or commentary to be had. We've already said what we had to.

I do not own Naruto which is owned by Musashi Kishimoto(unfortunately), Skullgirls by Lab Zero Games, or any jazz songs, they're all owned by their respective owners.

Recommended listening for this chapter.

Bold for demon speech, Painwheel speech, or similar characters talking.

Bold and Italic for attack names.

Italic for thoughts and flashbacks

Alice Francis: Shoot Him Down.

X-x-X-x-X

It was dark out when he got back to town after spending all day with Miss Fortune and getting a kiss from her to boot. Humming an upbeat song to himself, Naruto had a grin that only turned bemused when he spied a poster on a wall. It showed an attractive woman with dark skin in a deep black gown, black hair worn in a silky bobcut with a golden circlet around her head, and Egyptian features holding a microphone.

"See the amazin' Eliza on stage in town, performing lounge jazz… I do like jazz, but…" He read the poster with a curiously arched brow, then waved off at the poster, "I gotta do my job. Well, I already made money and messed enough with Cerebella-chan, not to mention Nadia… I can't let that kid wait any longer."

He stuffed his hands into his pockets, marching off to a café to settle find proper answers. Namely the Madman's Café, a favorite of late-night denizens like himself. Just the thought of the girl's parents worried faces made him turn serious. Sure, he tried to be upbeat and everything. In the end, reality was never kind. He hated dealing with personal things like that. When it came to it, though, he couldn't say no to any good parent. And he could never turn down a person in need regardless of how bizarre or dangerous the case may be.

Slumping onto a chair next to a girl drinking a milkshake, Naruto slapped some loose change down with a look of exhaustion hiding his worry, "Coffee, black if you'd be so kind. Spare the cream but put in sugar." He pulled a picture from his pocket, "And if you'd like a big tip, please tell me you've seen this cutie, pal."

He ordered from the owner, who shrugged and fetched him a cup of the hot beverage before taking the picture. Resting his elbows on the counter and then his chin on his intertwined fingers, the tired private dick turned his eye when he noticed his companion drinking her milkshake pause to stare at him. His eyes briefly took in her form before he shook his head and focused back on waiting for his drink and answers.

"Sorry, mate, no one's seen her." The owner said, giving him the picture back.

"Worth a try," he sighed before glancing at his female companion.

The girl was cute, he had to admit. Although something felt off the moment his eyes stared at her lovely hat. He could swear something moved inside. Perhaps it was the long day and he really needed his coffee, but bad experiences told him to be careful around any girl.

Thus, he decided to make some light conversation, "None of my business, but this isn't the time for a cutie like you to be here." Her outfit gave her away, even if her curvy and lovingly shapely and plump body could be that of a grown woman's.

"Piss off." Was the reply he got from the girl's side, but the voice was just unfittingly deep.

He would have questioned it, but he had seen weirder things. A girl with a voice to make Pavarotti green with envy seemed normal in comparison to a cat woman whose body was like a living puzzle set. Whatever the case, with that tone and confidence it was sure she could hold her own.

"Sorry then, little lady." He replied with a soft smile, waving a hand, "Long day, so my tongue and brain aren't working that well… Threatening as this may seem, I just don't want to see a girl in danger because of the bad company that walks around at this hour."

"Don't you get the hint?" that gravelly voice again went straight to the point.

"I can…" he said as smoothly as he could with the hostility he got, sliding a finger over the trim of his hat, using it to point at the girl's side, "It's this guy dressed like a rooster that may not get the hint."

The guy was obviously in the mafia, and he couldn't keep his hands to himself, "Sorry, dear gentleman, I think the lady here would appreciate more if she had some time with someone who'd treat her nicely. What say you, babe? Want to-"

He recognized the man, and he knew that the guy being a lothario would bite him in the ass. Probably much sooner than he thought. He kept track of everyone in the Medici Mafia. If the man was in his right mind and not thinking with the head below, he'd recognize Naruto was here too.

"Sorry, Ricardo, but if she said no to me, what makes you think your straightforward approach will do?" Naruto asked, tilting his hat down to cover his face and the tired but amused grin on it. "A warning, kittens like her ain't afraid to show their claws."

"Heh, aren't you rude?" the gangster asked smugly, trying to reach for the girl's face, "This pretty thing doesn't need guys like-"

"Don't touch her!"

That deep voice was followed by the girl's hat bursting into confetti. Naruto took a moment to blink when he saw a face with sharp fangs and yellow eyes on the other side of her head. He understood what moved in her hat when seeing her pitch-black hair wiggled around like living tendrils.

Before he could ask a thing to the girl, she had already grabbed the gangster with her living hair and promptly smashed him face first on the counter. Naruto mentally felt a shudder of empathetic pain run down his head; Riccardo would definitely be feeling that tomorrow morning…

Naruto whistled, "She's like the bunny, but actually cute…" he whispered as he walked to her, his hands in his pants pockets, "I guess you're the gentleman keeping the little dame safe."

The yellow-eyed face growled at him, "What's it to you? You think Imma let you near-"

"Samson, enough!" the girl said, using her hands to grab her hair and put it in place, giving the face on the other side of her head a glare as best as she could, "Please, he at least tried to be friendly."

"How do you know he wasn't in cahoots with that punk to-"

"Um, sorry, I'm here." Naruto said, waving his hand with an awkward smile, "I may need my cup of coffee, but I'm awake enough to be emotionally hurt by what you may want to say next."

"Samson! Just stop already…He's not a bad guy… his eyes are too nice for that." she finally tugged on the hair with a grimace. It went silent and looked closely at Naruto with harsh yellow slits.

The private detective held out a sucker with an honest smile as a peace offering, "Want a lollipop?"

The girl looked down at the innocent looking lollipop in her hands, curiously unwrapping the shiny gold paper to reveal an innocent looking silvery colored sweet treat. Just as she meant to put it in her mouth, Samson snatched it from her. The girl yelped in shock before he crunched it in his mouth with a suspicious look at Naruto.

"…The Hell?! Mint?! Blagh! What the hell kind of sucker tastes like that?!" He spat out the lollipop stick, gagging as bits of candy came from his toothy maw.

The stick was picked up by Naruto who grinned at them as he pulled out another, unwrapping it. "Sorry about that, I keep many different flavors with me. I usually keep mint in case my breath… Anyway, sorry, I didn't think you wouldn't like it."

"Who the Hell has candy that tastes like friggin' toothpaste?!" Samson roared. His tendrils pulled Naruto towards his face, and made the girl feel embarrassed at the fact she had the blond on her back.

"Hey, sorry, I just grabbed the first one I could. I got other flavors if you want another."

Samson snarled as Filia looked at him reproachfully before smiling at Naruto, "So what kind of guy are you Mr…?" he smiled sheepishly due to her cuteness, though he still seemed tired.

"Uzumaki, Naruto Uzumaki. Private detective. On a much more cheerful subject, what's your name?"

"Filia. Just Filia." she was surprised by the sheer friendliness around the blond, like the detective wished to avoid fighting at all costs. Even Samson was a little curious about why the man was just so… peaceful.

Adjusting his tie with a chortle, Naruto gave them a shrug, "I can tell your partner doesn't like me much. Worry not, I mean no harm. Unless someone else does. For the most part, I just enjoy the music this city has to offer."

A pause later, and she asked, "So, you're a detective, right?" she fidgeted but looked him in the eye.

He gave her a curious look, scratching his whiskered cheek, "Yeah? Need some help, lil' lady?"

"You're looking for someone right now, aren't you?" She had paid attention, "Sorry if it sounds rude, but I heard you talking to the owner."

"Yeah, there's a missing girl from a school, her parents asked me to look for her since no one else was willing to do it. The police got really cagey when they begged for help and told them their daughter's name. Carol was her… do you know her?" He keenly noticed Filia's gasp and guilty frown as they lingered on her face for more than a few seconds.

"That name…" she breathed out, a dazed look on her face as she tried to focus on something but couldn't.

Something did manage to click for her though, he had guessed as much when her eyes seemed to focus again, the synapses in her brain firing up and feeding her fragments of memory.

A brown-haired girl who although she was kind and happy didn't possess too many friends. An image of Filia herself but with straighter blonde hair reaching to her or trying to. All of this flowed into her brain and overrode it briefly with feelings of guilt, worry, anguish, so many thoughts and feelings rammed themselves into her very core in the span of a few seconds and made her head ache terribly. The memories she had stopped just when she saw the brunette once again before the brown-haired girl ran off in tears, leaving her only with guilt and worry that she did something cruel to the girl.

The private detective stopped suddenly and unwrapped a new lollipop. He shoved a dark brown candy in his mouth and chuckled to himself when he tasted delicious cocoa. He turned to Filia with a serene look on his face.

"Hey, if you know what happened or what this Carol was like, I'd appreciate if you told me about it. I want to bring her back where she belongs. If she's been nabbed by the Medici, if she's involved with a gang or something, if she ran away from home because of bullying at school… I'm listening right now because you look like you need a listening ear."

When he dropped his tired man façade, he looked genuinely caring and mature. Nadia told him that he became more like the kid she met when they were younger. She called it being true to himself, he thought it just made him look sappy and hated how he could get soft at times.

Filia closed her eyes and clenched them tight, emotions and thoughts warring across her face until she snapped them open, the determined red eyes staring resolutely up into his blue orbs. "Okay, I'll tell you everything. Just, please… promise me. You'll let me help you find Carol!"

Naruto looked surprised by her request, then looked her over in a more serious light. Despite her pleasant and plump body, he could tell behind her kind heart and sweet face lurked the will and desire of someone who wanted to atone for something they did wrong. He mused that if she hadn't met him that night, she might have done something drastic and ruined her life down the line. He had seen too many people make the worst of choices and become irredeemable monsters. So, he nodded at her with the necessary gravitas to show he agreed with her desire to help him.

'What the heck? Nadia is always telling me to make more friends anyway.' He nodded, "Alright, agreed. Welcome on board. Let's find somewhere a little more private so we can discuss this in full."

"Just don't try anything funny, private dick." Samson said, "Kid's got it bad enough with or without me, I ain't letting you hurt her."

"Fine by me." He said with a genuine smile, feeling like Samson was more of a real man than most men in the city.

Leading her on, he led her into a private park, before sitting down next to her on a bench. He inwardly thanked the fact parks were some of the few places kids could be safe even at night. Grasping her hands tightly, Filia bit her lip for several tense seconds before she begun talking and talk, she did.

"Carol was a classmate of mine. I wanted so badly to reach her, she needed help the most, but something happened. I don't know what it was. Knowing that I never helped her and that she's missing, I now know I need to act. Mr. Detective, thank you. At last I remembered something…"

Filia truly looked upset with what she may have done or not done to help Carol, until Naruto reached out again to pat her shoulder gently. The detective looked at her with a sad smile.

"Don't you worry about what you did in the past that you're ashamed of, the present's the best time to do the right thing." His words came from experience, and he talked from the heart too. Then, he frowned, "Although, amnesia, huh?"

"Yeah, it's part of the reason I'm wandering around at times..." she confessed.

"You're just trying to sound cool…" Samson said lowly but remained calmer than before.

Filia tried to reply but Naruto just gave her a small grin.

His blue eyes looked into hers with as much truthfulness as he could show, "I think I found a good way to pay you, little lady. How does finding your missing memories sound?"

"Mr. Detective…" Filia started until his face broke into a grin.

"I'd say we had enough moping around." He got up as he turned to Filia with a lazy grin. "Let's go. We need to trace your and Carol's steps and find out just what happened to the two of you."

Filia walked beside the taller man, a few seconds passed by before she asked him with a somewhat naïve tone as he gave her a smile, "You think she was kidnapped Mr. Detective?"

"Carol was kidnapped any way you look at it. She's not the first though, my logic is that it was by someone who didn't care who they got, only that they were young and female. Now for what reason you got me, but whoever did it was more than likely nasty." He explained in a serious tone, sounding truly mature.

FIlia clenched her fists tightly, her red eyes focused with even more determination than before, "Do you think it's the Medici?" she asked.

Rubbing the back of his head, he sighed, "Even they can't get away with child slavery without crackdowns. Last time they did, many of their higher ups got slammed by the media for that, worse they caught the eyes of the Canopy Kingdom, had to go underground and lose a lot of money lest they risk Princess Parasoul coming down on them with the Black Egrets at her heels. They'd be a little more discreet for this. Kidnap a few kids right out of Maplecrest? That gets bad attention fast. Kidnap one girl and no one knows where she went? Easy to explain away, kids do stupid stuff for any reason."

Samson filled Filia in on Naruto's train of thought when he noticed her looking a little lost, "What the private dick means kid, is that your friend Carol was kidnapped because it's a really easy thing to lie and say she ran away or somethin'. One girl missing suddenly won't be noticed for a while except by her close friends and parents. That's why Carol hasn't been found yet. No one knows nothing and anyone who might know somethin' is shushed more than likely, amirite there private dick?"

"Right on the rent money, I even fear someone is blocking my investigation big time. Leads to where she was go cold, the police don't help, not like they ever do, and whenever I look into things I get dead ends. Something's definitely fishier than the piers."

Filia was able to fill in the details on her own from there, and the conclusion she came to had her blood boiling, "You think someone's keeping her away from her parents? Why? What do they get out of this?"

"Now that's the million-dollar question, isn't it?" Naruto said and suppressed a sigh.

Filia nodded with a firm look, allowing him to continue. "I know this is not what the Medici usually do in comparison to what kids they'd target. They look for big money, a single little girl like Carol isn't even pocket change for those guys."

As much as she liked being kind and didn't like fighting people, Filia knew that whoever was responsible for Carol's disappearance wasn't someone she'd hold back against. What made her heart hopeful and her mind calm was that the tall man at her side felt exactly the same.

X-X-X-X-X

The two of them looked into the matter late into the night, going all over the deserted streets to find any shred of clues they could make use of to find a path to Carol's whereabouts. It then became a pattern as time passed by in any attempts to encounter hair or hide from the girl. Of course, Filia had her own life to attend to as a schoolgirl while Naruto kept working whenever she was in classes.

"Excuse me, but what is your business here?" asked Filia's teacher, who Naruto recognized.

"Mrs. Victoria, right?" he asked with a lollipop on his mouth. A true stunner of a dame in a double-breasted white suit, a black business skirt, and high-heels. The fact she had a baton and her hair done in a large bun made him slightly envy the kids who'd see her every day. Her voluptuous body and statuesque presence put other women to shame. And she topped it all with a pair of reading glasses.

"Answer my question, please." She replied with her arms crossed under her large bust.

Ruffling his hair, he let out a lazy chuckle, "Picking up a partner. One of your student's helping me with a little business involving a missing girl."

"Carol, right?" she asked more at ease, "Do you..." she paused, eyeing him carefully.

Pulling out his lollipop, he answered truthfully but with a tired smile, "I'd like to say I have a solid clue on where she's at, but you could see I'm lying. Doesn't mean I'll give up easy like the cops here."

"I wish you the best, then, but just to be clear..." her baton cut his lollipop's stick before he could blink, a shocked expression on his still placidly smiling face, "...I will hold you accountable for my students."

"Heh, wouldn't dream of making them cry." He said and held his lollipop by the half stick he had left.

"Good." She said and closed her eyes, "However, I do have a clue, Private Detective Naruto Uzumaki. I'm aware of a few things as a teacher should. Carol was a healthy student who often visited the nurse."

"Huh...you think there's something off with the nurse here?" he asked, pulling out a notepad.

"A substitute arrived here before her disappearance and did constant checkups, until she left one day. I do recall she often had Carol visit her, which wasn't an issue since she seemed sickly."

"But only looked sick after this nurse arrived, right?" he saw her train of thought.

Mrs. Victoria nodded with a bitter expression, "Sadly, it was all under the government's paperwork and we can't hand out profiles to anyone. One of the downfalls of being a public school."

"Tell me about it." He remembered his childhood not being the best for several reasons. "Thanks for the tip, though. Looking into this could be easier if you had any idea on what this nurse is and looks like."

"I have no memory, regrettably. Nor does most of the staff here." She sighed irritably, "We're all told to man our positions and the government just sets whoever's needed here. But that nurse wasn't even with us in meetings or even around the halls. Everything we heard from her was from the principal, and he'd never talked to or seen her."

"And since this isn't something you can talk about with the big wigs breathing down your necks, telling a new friend of odd things you've seen helps...calm your nerves, doesn't it?"

"I am glad you've studied people well."

"Comes with the job, teach."

"That's Mrs. Victoria, young man."

He chortled and adjusted his hat, "One more question, though. Any other students affiliated with this mystery lady?"

"Only Carol visited her often."

"It's as good a lead as any, speaking of..." he smiled when seeing Filia exit class for the day, "Hey, ready to hit the town?"

"Y-yes, I've talked to my classmates of where they saw her last!" the plump cutie beamed.

"Good, because this will take a while."

He walked off with Filia in tow, the girl's shy and faltering steps being just behind the tired yet confident stride of the private detective. Mrs. Victoria stared at them sadly, feeling a pang of guilt enter her heart. Softly whispering to herself, she clutched one arm tightly.

"You better treat her right detective. Filia's a sweet girl, and she's been through so much pain for her young life." He shocked her by raising a hand when he was just a step from exiting the school, he turned his head and tilted his hat in understanding at her request.

"He heard me. What kind of man are you, Mr. Naruto?" she asked herself, unable to stop a smile from crossing her face, she could trust a man like that. He would do Filia a world of good. As her teacher, Mrs. Victoria felt unable to help the poor girl.

She'd trust that Naruto, regardless of her initial misgivings towards his responsibility, would be good for Filia's self-confidence.

X-X-X-X-X

Feng was Cerebella's best friend and worried sick for her. Her busty bruiser was thickheaded and quite a lovely girl, but her temper was her weakness. Also, she didn't think things as well as she pretended to do or attempted to. Perhaps that was why she wanted to genuinely help her. However...

"I'm not sure if this is genius or insane." Said the petite Chinese girl as she held a letter from Vitale, explaining what was to happen in short order.

They were to stay put during Naruto's excursions into Maplecrest, and not interfere with the detective's work. Vitale had always been wary of the blond man, nearly ten years since he arrived in New Meridian, and to this day they still hadn't figured out how someone with such a unique set of skills had slipped under their noses for so long.

A competent detective, a brilliant mind, and an excessively powerful fighter all in a disarming swing-loving exhausted package. Naruto was a member of the one in a million. A one in a million was slang among the underworld. It was used for someone who was otherworldly powerful and remained under the radar until without warning they burst onto the scene and became a game changer. They were among the most feared of that dark world since they often had no allegiance to anything but their own convictions. Which meant that doing business around them was a risk should they consider such actions intolerable.

Hating and suspecting the detective, Vitale was attempting to reign in his most treasured instruments burgeoning infatuation with the detective. Five years he hadn't paid attention to the blond detective, and in that time, Cerebella had begun to express some form of doubt towards her work. In the Medici Mafia, a tool that didn't do what it was supposed to was discarded.

All this Feng knew but didn't have the heart to tell Cerebella who had been knee-deep in this slime for so long she had since rationalized the reality in any way she could. Believing that the Medici's were just misunderstood and were doing their jobs. Denying and blocking out the discrepancies that told her heart the truth, refusing to see the reality and blocking out her genuine good nature with her loyalty to the only family she had ever known.

Feng had seen Cerebella grow from a teenager at 18 to a young woman at 23. Naruto had come into their lives at 20. Five years had seemed to pass by in the blink of an eye. The odd detective still looked the same for them. He changed things entirely just by meeting them. His fists dented Cerebella's impenetrable armor of self-assurance, and now she was coming to a crossroads.

Feng knew that her best friend might have to make a harsh choice one day. Staying loyal to the Medici. Or following her own budding sense of morality.

On that day, she'd make her own choice. But it'd be the same regardless of what Cerebella did. She'd follow her best friend to the ends of the Earth if that's what it took to remain at her side.

"And he didn't come to tell me?" Cerebella asked in shock.

"More like he's...busy." Feng didn't believe it, but told it as it was said to her. "With those disappearances from some of our men, he doesn't feel like taking a risk."

"And why send me after Whiskers?" Cerebella asked her.

"He...didn't." Feng corrected her, surprised by the hurt on her friend's face, "What's with that look?"

"I...I really wanted a rematch with Whiskers, is all." The girl sulked again, to which Feng became sterner.

"Cerebella, you know that Vitale hates you seeing him. Why do you like fighting him so much?"

Cerebella looked away, mumbling something while gripping her arm in frustration, "isnotmnpshanl."

Her mumbled voice made Feng raise an eyebrow, "Is not what?"

"It's not personal! Whiskers fights me because he likes challenging me! For once I don't feel like I'm being asked to do something! He's a real challenge. Someone who pushes me to my limit and who I push right back! And he's great company!" Her outburst was heralded by her face turning a bright red. She looked to the side quickly, poking her fingers together, and said, seeming dreamy at the end, "Besides… Whiskers always give me one hell of a time. I've never been so alive as when on the edge of my rope, fighting him to a standstill… Five years and he's given me the best fights of my life."

Feng coughed, a little embarrassed by the fact that Cerebella had her hand on her very lovely breast and a bit frustrated with how she missed the point of their assignment entirely to focus on her obsessions, "Our target is a woman sighted near the missing members of the family." She handed her a picture of a woman with a ponytail, "As far as we know, she's been at Maplecrest on the lookout for Vitale's men."

"Hmm...Whiskers does have a knack for finding targets, right?" Cerebella grinned.

"W-what's with that face?" Feng grew worried.

"Well, what Vitale doesn't know won't hurt him, right?" the acrobat beamed, "And I want to face him, so all we gotta do is kill two birds with one stone."

Feng gave her best friend a concerned stare, "And your plan is to just tell him?"

"Yep!" that smile said it all, and the Dragon Empire girl rubbed her temples in response.

"Okay." That said it all, and with that the two of them got to writing a note. It didn't take long to do, and together the two switched their hand writing, alternating lines to mix up the flow and make it impossible to trace back to them.

Cerebella snuck it underneath his door while he was away from the apartment, snickering to herself before she crept away again. Feng waiting for her at the entrance.

"You're done?" she asked, Cerebella giving her a happy little nod, "Whiskers will do all our dirty work for us! Aren't we just the smartest little mafia women in the room?"

Wincing, Feng flashed Cerebella a strained grin, "We are, of course."

Holding her hands together behind her back, Cerebella whistled a jazz song to herself playfully.

The table was set, and she knew what'd happen next would be one exciting sight.

X-x-X-X-x

Next chapter will be up shortly.