Disclaimer: I do not own any of the original characters or plot lines of the HTTYD movies or books.
Having received his promised ink, wrestled from a giant squid by Trader Johann himself, Hiccup made his way through the village, making sure to keep an eye on the time bomb just waiting to explode that was Snotlout and Ruffnut. Apart from seeing Snotlout becoming more and more uncoordinated as time went on, there was nothing too alarming going on. It was now mid-afternoon, and Hiccup had overheard Tuffnut telling Gustav in the Dragon Arena that Ruffnut was only forced to flirt with Snotlout until sundown, so he wasn't to interfere. Tuffnut told him that he had made Ruffnut wait until this day to flirt with Snotlout because of celebrations of Bork week that would begin late afternoon, giving her plenty of opportunity to annoy him. Snotlout, of course, didn't know this and probably feared that this new development in Ruffnut's behaviour towards him was permanent.
Almost tempted to jump in and stop the madness because of that, Hiccup hesitated as he saw Snotlout trying to wave Ruffnut, who was trying to make him go with her to the celebrations, off in the village square, telling her that he just wasn't interested, before promptly walking into a pole next to the forge that was in plain view, right in front of him. Serves you right, Snotlout, he thought with a smile, all thoughts of telling Ruffnut to give him a break gone. How do you think Astrid's felt all these years with you flirting with her? At that thought, Hiccup remembered his agreed rendezvous with Astrid and Fishlegs in the arena to discuss Fishlegs' new idea about the book of Dragons.
Snotlout, meanwhile, was most certainly not having a good day. Ruffnut had reached a point that was beyond annoying. Hiccup had told him to mess up, and so he had. Badly. His fall count for the hour was already seven, but still Ruffnut wouldn't stop.
But he was free now, at least for the moment, having muttered an excuse and then quite literally sprinted away from Ruffnut and towards Hookfang, who had seen his obvious distress and was for once cooperative.
And so, as he flew away from Berk as fast as he could, Snotlout pondered for the millionth time how he could get rid of Ruffnut. Hiccup's tactic wasn't working, and he only had a few hours before the celebrations that he was expected to be at to figure out a new one before he had to head back to Berk.
Telling Ruffnut he simply wasn't interested wouldn't work – he had already tried that multiple times. He could ignore her, but he doubted that would be any more successful than telling her.
It was time to take drastic measures.
Snotlout found himself, once again, in the presence of Ruffnut. He hoped this plan was going to work – constantly acting uncoordinated was beginning to ruin his reputation, but even that was going to look like nothing after this.
"Erm… Ruffnut… there's something you should know before, ya know… anything becomes official or anything." He hated himself for sounding like there was a chance at anything between them, for letting her hopes raise when there was nothing to hope for. Even he wasn't completely heartless (though he'd never admit that, especially as hearts were for girls).
They were in the village square, and being mid-afternoon and the time some people began to return from their fishing trips or other jobs around Berk to prepare for the celebrations, it was quite busy.
"Yeah Snotty-poo? What is it?" Ruffnut seemed unconcerned.
Well, she might be more concerned once she hears this.
"Well… I'm not quite sure how to say this…" Snotlout said, turning away and covering his mouth with his hand as if to hide a yawn but instead blowing a raspberry onto his palm, making a horrible sound as if he farted. "Um, ya see, erm… There's this thing I've had for a while… I have this problem where I really gotta go. A lot."
And with that Snotlout bolted in the direction of the outhouse, hoping Ruffnut would fall for this façade.
Snotlout had hidden in his outhouse for over an hour before Ruffnut came knocking.
"Snotty-poo? Are you in there? Are you okay? I was wondering if you wanted to come with me to the square? It's nearly dark, and you should join in. Everyone's there." She said, her voice sounding strained, almost as if she really didn't want to be there. Snotlout felt a ray of hope as he heard this. Maybe one more humiliation on his part would do it.
He blew a loud raspberry onto the palm of his hand again and called out to her, "Just a minute Ruffnut, I'm a little… busy… at the moment. Why don't you go ahead?"
Ruffnut didn't say anything, but Snotlout could hear her trudging away towards the square.
Snotlout almost felt bad about the way he had treated her, but she wouldn't give up any other way.
And so Snotlout walked to the square alone in the near dark. When he reached it, Ruffnut and Tuffnut seemed to be arguing about something as they walked towards the hall where most of Berk had gathered.
"… But it's practically dark already! Do I still have to?"
"We've gone through this already, dear sister. You lost. You have to keep going. Until the sun goes down. Completely."
Snotlout could see the annoyance on Ruffnut's face as she took in this information. Whatever she had to do for – he glanced at the rapidly sinking sun before he entered the hall – the next ten or twenty minutes, she wasn't impressed.
He grabbed a plate of food and sat down at one of the tables at the end of the hall, away from the celebrating Vikings. Ruffnut made her way over to him and he inwardly cursed. At least, he thought grimly, Ruffnut doesn't judge people very easily.
"Look, Snotlout, I want to be more than friends with you just about as much as Hiccup hates Toothless," she said, all business like and nothing like the earlier, flirting her. Snotlout was taken aback. While he was quite happy she didn't seem to be trying to flirt anymore, he was quite surprised. Apparently, she did judge people.
"Nor did I ever. But the idiot over there," she jerked her thumb over her shoulder at Tuffnut, "made me flirt with you all day. I have to do it until sunset, which is about ten minutes, so I thought I'd tell you anyway."
Snotlout was quite surprised at this news. Not only had Ruffnut claimed to not even like him the slightest bit (which was, of course, a first with any girl), but she was also incredibly good at acting, something Vikings of Berk were not renowned for, because of course she liked him, even if she was acting on Tuffnut's orders.
"What?" He asked, not too politely, "But – all day – that was Tuffnut trying to annoy me?"
Ruffnut nodded. "And me. He wants revenge from when he lost a bet and I made him flirt with Meatlug for a day." Snotlout was actually quite offended by this comment. Apparently the Tuffnut saw him as a worse potential partner than Meatlug, of all possibilities. Obviously, he reasoned, he was insane.
"Well, never mind about that," he said hurriedly, wanting to see if Ruffnut would agree with him about Tuffnut needing punishment for what he did. "So, I assume you're gonna want revenge on him for his revenge on you?" he said this slowly, figuring it out in his head. Ruffnut nodded. "Well then," Snotlout said, "I think I have an idea."
Hope you all enjoyed this chapter. There will probably be one or two more after this… hopefully up sooner than this one was. As ever thanks to Hermione'sDaughter who was responsible for beta-ing this chapter.