2. The Girl Has a Day Out

Sasuke had known she was doomed. She'd only made it to the next street when she found Kiba, Akamaru, Shino and some Neji-lookalike Hyuuga walking towards a training ground. She stood stock still on the edge of the intersection, hoping that the three wouldn't see her; wishing she could be invisible right now. All the wishing in the world didn't help. The three stopped and stared at her.

There was a tense silence between them for a moment. It was usually impossible to see what the look on Shino's face was but Sasuke was sure that the expressions Kiba and the Hyuuga had were disappointed and distrustful. Luckily, she could only see blurs and vague details where their faces should be. Even though she was right about the Hyuuga, Kiba actually looked very confused and Shino had a raised eyebrow. Of course, they were upset about the actions the young Uchiha had taken in the past few years and not only were they confused about why she was out of gaol; there was something about her that they couldn't quite put their finger on.

"Morning Uchiha," Kiba finally said, startling Sasuke with the lack of hostility but at least he wasn't being very familiar because that would just be too weird for Sasuke to handle. "You seem different."

"It's probably just because you haven't seen me in a while," she replied.

"No, you're different-different."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, masking her mortification over the notion that Kiba may have already found out her secret. A bug landed on her shoulder and she went to swat it but it darted out of the way quickly and buzzed away to land on Shino's finger.

"This bug seems to think you smell different too," Shino said. "Have you undergone any physical changes?"

Sasuke fought the blush and stared impassively, not trusting herself to give them an answer with a straight face.

"I'm sure Akamaru's nose is slightly more accurate," the Hyuuga said, ignoring the dismayed tilt of Shino's head at the comment. "Kiba-san, can you two do an analysis?"

"Sure thing," Kiba said, approaching Sasuke with his huge dog. Sasuke didn't flinch when Akamaru's big, wet nose bumped and prodded her during the investigation but her nerves were bundling up inside her. Kiba stood in front of her, looking down. Now that was strange. "You shrank."

"I think that's rather redundant at this point," Sasuke snapped, giving him a defiant glare. "And who is that guy? I don't recognise him," she added, gesturing to the Hyuuga with her eyes alone.

"Che! You're so frickin' rude. We ran into him at the Hyuuga compound and he agreed to come train with us since Hinata has something else." Sasuke narrowed her eyes. That did not answer her question.

Akamaru finished his examination and stepped back, communicating his findings with a few quick barks. Kiba's eyes widened.

"No way, Akamaru, check again. That can't be right."

"What did he say?" the Hyuuga asked.

"He's trying to tell me that Uchiha somehow turned into a girl."

"That's not possible," Shino said. "In Konoha it's illegal to get sex reassignment surgery until the patient turns twenty-one. Not only is he not old enough but he was definitely male when he was imprisoned."

"Tokuma-san, you can confirm it with Byakugan, can't you?" Kiba said.

He shook his head. "I'm above such vulgar things."

"Oh come on! It's the best way to be certain."

Tokuma sighed and reluctantly activated his bloodline limit. He looked only for a few seconds before his eyes widened and he deactivated his ability. "It's true!"

"What! No it's not, you liar!" Kiba shouted, unzipping Sasuke's shirt and throwing it open. He nearly had a mental shut down when two bare boobs were revealed. Somehow, Sasuke thought they looked bigger than they were the last time she looked. Tokuma and Shino both looked stuck for words as well.

"You pervert!" someone screeched, making Akamaru howl. A woman, who just so happened to be walking past, threw a high heeled shoe at Kiba's head. It hit its mark. She lunged at him and pushed him to the ground before she began to beat him with her other shoe. "You lecher! You creep! You sicko! Molesting a girl in public like that. Don't you have any decency?!"

Sasuke took a deep breath through her nose and zipped up her shirt. She decided to use this opportunity, while Shino and Tokuma were still shocked and Akamaru was barking at the civilian lady, to take her leave. However, she was stopped by Tokuma. She turned around and squinted at him, trying to discern the expression on his face as he held some bandages and balm out to her in one hand.

"I noticed you were injured," he said. Sasuke blinked. She must have been seeing things, but it looked like he was blushing. "It must have been from the chains in prison. In any case, you should try to heal them."

Sasuke narrowed her eyes slightly. Was he really thinking what she suspected? She held out her arms to test him. "You can put it on."

He seemed taken aback and the blush that he must have been trying to fight flared up. "Um... okay."

They sat down on the side of the street and Sasuke took off her shoes to allow Tokuma access to her ankles. They weren't quite as raw as her wrists. Tokuma tenderly rubbed the pale green balm on the sore, red flesh and bandaged it. When he was done, Sasuke quickly stood up, uttered a curt thank-you and walked off quickly. She couldn't believe it. She hadn't been a girl for even twenty-four hours and someone already had a crush on her. She took a deep breath. It would pass. She didn't believe in love at first sight, it was just a mild infatuation borne from the fact that Tokuma had had a chance to see her boobs.

She turned a corner and froze again. There, at Ramen Ichiraku, were Shikamaru and Chouji. She skirted around the shop and tried to walk past as quietly and normally as she could but couldn't hold down the surprised grunt when someone ran into her. They both tumbled to the ground. The commotion caught the attention of both Shikamaru and Chouji, who turned around to see what had happened.

"Ah, sorry! I was trying to do three hundred laps around Konoha on my hands while pulling this boulder with my teeth and I wasn't paying proper attention to the path."

Sasuke's eyes widened. She recognised that voice and that type of ridiculous trial that only two people in Konoha would even try. She turned around and found Lee picking himself off the ground and offering her a hand before even dusting himself. Behind him on a slackened length of rope was the boulder he was trying to pull... and boy, was it a large boulder. Lee's eyes widened in shock horror when he realised who he'd run into.

"Uchiha! That's not even possible! You're meant to be in prison for your heinous deeds!" Lee shouted.

"What?" Shikamaru and Chouji exclaimed, jumping out of their seats and taking a battle stance.

"What are you doing here?" Chouji demanded.

"I was released," Sasuke answered, picking herself up and dusting her clothes. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get to the supermarket."

"Hold on a minute!" Lee interrupted before Sasuke could leave. "What in the name of all things youthful are you doing out of prison? This is rather confounding."

"I know," Sasuke replied. "I was let out on the basis that I'm not really Uchiha Sasuke."

The three boys blinked at her.

"Like we'd believe that!" Chouji snapped. "You must have broken out somehow."

"Maybe it is true," Shikamaru said, looking Sasuke up and down. "You have a slightly different physique to the Uchiha Sasuke we know, although that could be attributed to muscle atrophy due to the disuse while you were locked up. You are a bit smaller too and I can't think of an explanation as to how you managed to shrink yourself unless you used a transformation technique. Your voice also sounds very different. But I doubt a simple transformation would be enough to trick the guards at the prison – they're ANBU level ninja."

Sasuke made a sound that was like a grunt crossed with a laugh. "I was kidding. I am Uchiha Sasuke. However, I was serious about being released from prison."

"That makes no sense," Chouji pointed out. "You are Uchiha Sasuke but you claim you were released on the basis that you're not."

"I must admit, looking at you gives me a weird feeling," Lee said.

"We must all be feeling it," Shikamaru said, "because Uchiha is now a girl."

"Eh?!" Chouji and Lee yelled.

"You don't believe me?" Shikamaru asked, walking over to Sasuke and opening her shirt to reveal her breasts again. Lee and Chouji blushed vibrantly. Shikamaru also stared. "It must be troublesome," he said to Sasuke.

"What are you doing?!" Ayame shrieked. She had been around the back and hadn't heard the conversation. When she came back all she saw was Shikamaru holding open the shirt of a bare-breasted Uchiha Sasuke-lookalike girl. She grabbed a random utensil (which happened to be a ladle), leaped over the counter and bashed Shikamaru over the head repeatedly. Lee and Chouji had their eyes closed and were blushing furiously. Sasuke zipped up her shirt again and made her getaway.

Sasuke ran through the streets at top speed, hoping a speeding blur would deter anyone else she knew from spotting her. She skidded to a halt, realising that there was a reason why super fast movement was usually reserved for battle purposes. She couldn't really see where she was going and ended up standing in front of the mall. She sighed. She'd taken a wrong turn. She turned around about to run back but she stopped. Time seemed to slow down and the air suddenly felt heavy and thick like water. Right behind her was Haruno Sakura. The two stared at each other wide-eyed.

"Sa-Sasuke-kun?" Sakura whispered. "Am I dreaming?"

"Unfortunately not," Sasuke replied. "I am really here."

"But why? You're in gaol!"

"Under the circumstances, it seems that I'm not really myself."

"I don't get it... but I'm glad to see you Sasuke." Sakura rushed forward. Sasuke's eyes widened but some part of her couldn't bring herself to deny Sakura a hug, just like the time he had walked away from her. She would allow the pinkette to wrap her arms around her long-lost friend, but that was it. It was enough, though, to make Sakura realise one crucial difference. She jumped back in surprise, unzipped Sasuke's shirt and held it open. She gaped at the sight of breasts where pectorals had once been.

"Oh my god!" Sakura gasped. She grabbed Sasuke's injured wrist and dragged her into the mall. "Ino! Tenten! Hinata!"

The three girls who'd been waiting just within the mall's doors looked away from their conversation as Sakura thrust a bare-chested Sasuke in front of them. "Sasuke-kun turned into a woman!"

Hinata fainted. Ino looked like she'd seen a ghost and Tenten looked like she had just sucked on a lemon. Sasuke sighed and calmly zipped up her shirt. "How many times are people going to unzip my shirt to stare at my boobs? Yes, I have turned into a woman. Now excuse me, I took a wrong turn and I need to get to the supermarket."

"Huh? Wait, Sasuke-kun, you haven't been here for a while," Sakura replied, since she was the only one who could still speak. "Konoha has already been destroyed and rebuilt. The supermarket was moved to be behind the mall. For convenience, you know."

"Oh? Well that's good then. I need to purchase some food and new clothes."

"Shut up both of you!" Ino screeched. "How can you just sit there and pretend there's nothing wrong with this situation? Sasuke-kun... h-how?"

"Ask Tsunade," Sasuke replied. "I would bet my inheritance that she has something to do with this. And knowing her, I would probably win."

"Tsunade-shishou?" Sakura said.

"You have an inheritance?" Tenten piped up.

"Of course. Since I'm the last member of the Uchiha clan, all of the clan's finances automatically get passed on to me."

"And exactly how much is this inheritance?" Ino asked.

"Eight hundred million yen."

A shocked silence was slammed down between them. The girls gawked at him with their jaws hanging open. Ino and Sakura looked like they were about to cry. Sasuke figured they would want to. After all, the moment the ninja who was considered to be the most handsome in the village gained an enormous inheritance was also the moment he became female.

"In any case, it'll get me off the ground so that I might be able to start working," Sasuke continued.

"Eight hundred million yen will do more than 'get you off the ground'!" Ino pointed out. It was about this time that Hinata was starting to wake up and pick herself up off the floor.

"Wh-what?" she murmured. "Eight hundred million yen? Who has that?"

"Sasuke-kun does," Ino told her.

Hinata looked at Sasuke with the dazed and faraway look of someone who wasn't quite awake yet. "R-really? That's funny that we mention Uchiha-san now because I just had a strange dream where he turned into a girl."

"That was no dream, Hinata," Sakura said. "Somehow, Sasuke-kun is now a girl."

Hinata blinked and looked between Sakura and Sasuke several times. Her body started to shake a little bit. Tenten quickly turned her around and started to fan her and mutter soothing words to get her to calm down. Ino sighed. She supposed there was no other real choice than to accept it because this was obviously a dream. There was no other explanation for it. She was still in bed dreaming about going shopping with her friends in the morning.

"I suppose we're going to have to help you with your shopping then," she said, earning a startled glance from all of the other girls. "You'd be uncomfortable with going into the girls' sections by yourself otherwise, right? And we'll have to help you co-ordinate the outfits properly since boys are always bad at doing that."

"I don't need your help," Sasuke snapped.

"But don't you see? You do," Ino insisted, putting her hands on Sasuke's shoulders. "You already don't get it. One of the biggest things about being a girl is: shopping outings are quintessential social gatherings. Therefore, we cannot allow you to shop by yourself."

"That's not a law," Sasuke retorted, pushing Ino's hands off. "I'll shop alone."

"Not a law?!" Tenten exclaimed. She and Sakura both stood beside Ino, backing her up. "Of course it is! It's an unwritten, unspoken law!"

"Which only further denounces the reliability."

"Sasuke-kun, whether you want to or not, you have to shop with us," Sakura reasoned. "There are many things about a woman's world that a man will never experience. Women and men have different bodies and different needs. I guess it will be okay for you to shop alone in future, but for now you need us to show you the ropes. Now, let's do some shopping."

Sasuke sighed but the argument had won her over and she relented.

I think Sasuke's boobs have now been seen by more men than any of the other kunoichi and things will only get more absurd from here on out.

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